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 THEY laugh
together like old friends as they stroll in the sunshine through a
park. Two elegant blondes with an unusual bond — and an amazing
story to tell.
For both Nikki Kingdon and Sally Farmiloe are
former mistresses of disgraced Jeffrey Archer — and today they lift
the lid on their affairs with the jailed millionaire author.
The beauties formed a bizarre friendship three months
ago after bumping into each other in the powder room of a celebrity
restaurant.
 And later, in
an astonishing dinner conversation, the perfectly groomed pair
shared their biggest bedroom secret — that Archer had told
BOTH of them he had not had sex with wife Mary, pictured
right in 1987, for 13 YEARS.
"I have no trouble believing that," said Sally later,
shaking her head after Mary told the Old Bailey that stories of them
leading separate lives were "complete and utter nonsense".
"Jeffrey seemed starved of both sex and affection. In
my mind it was clear he was referring to sex stopping in 1987 when
Mary gave evidence at the libel trial."
And Nikki, pictured left with Sally, confirmed: "He
told me he had not had sex with her for 13 years when I met him in
February. And I believe it too."
 Then, over
tagliatelle, ribeye steak and green salad, the two women toasted
each other with a glass of chilled champagne before comparing notes
on their infamous ex-lover.
Actress Sally, 47, was Archer's mistress for three
years. She reveals today how he planned to romp with her under a
table at the House of Lords and how he liked to watch dirty movies
as they made love in his luxury flat overlooking the Thames.
And how the kinky peer was thrilled when, at the
height of his campaign to become London mayor, she sneaked into his
home for sex disguised as a man — wearing suspenders and a G-string
beneath her suit, overcoat and trilby hat.
Furious
Married recruitment executive Nikki, 51, was probably
the last mistress Archer took before justice caught up with him at
the Old Bailey. She was pictured holding hands with him in February
on a beach near his South African holiday villa.
In an amazing twist to the saga, she has begun divorce
proceedings against her husband — naming a mystery party on the
legal documents.
 At her dinner
with Sally, pictured right with the peer, she poured her heart out
about Archer's lies.
"They were talking loudly and didn't seem to mind who
heard them," said a fellow guest at the exclusive Belvedere
restaurant in Holland Park.
"Nikki was furious that Archer sent her packing from
South Africa once news of their affair hit the headlines.
"He told her to lay low for a while and promised to
buy her a flat in the block where he had his apartment in London.
"But it was all just fantasy. She even called him a
Walter Mitty character who lived in his books.
"Sally was sat there nodding because she obviously
knew the scenario very well."
Sally knew all the scenarios too when it came to sex
with Archer. He was so desperate for love she had no difficulty
believing he and Mary were celibate.
"I am not a fool, I know Jeffrey might very well tell
his mistress that his relationship with his wife was dead," she
said.
"But the man was rampant. He was incredibly keen just
to be cuddled and told what a smashing chap he was."
He also had a kinky side, she reveals. During his
mayoral campaign his flat was besieged by the press and top Tory
politicians. "We had not seen each other for ages because he had
been so busy," she said.
So one night Sally dreamed up an ingenious disguise to
sneak in for a secret sex session.
 She slipped
into a navy blue lace bra, G-string and hold-up stockings. And then
she donned a dark suit and full-length coat, finishing off the
deception by tucking her long blonde locks under a trilby hat,
pictured left. Sally drove from her home in west London and parked
near Archer's penthouse before walking the final few yards.
She said: "It was great, nobody suspected a thing even
though there were a couple of reporters waiting outside the flat. I
pulled my hat rim over my eyes and walked in. Not even the porter
recognised me.
"The lift to Jeffrey's apartment on the 13th floor
opens straight into the flat so I quickly put on some lipstick on
the way up.
"He was gobsmacked when he opened the door. He found
my man's outfit electrifyingly sexy and was thrilled. Sally began to
slowly strip off. The effect was too much for Archer.
"He just tore his clothes off down to his Y-fronts and
leapt into his four-poster bed with his underpants on to watch me
undress. I got to my underwear, then he said, 'Stop right there,
don't take off another thing.'
"He told me that I was ‘stunningly beautiful' as I got
into bed with him — and then he pounced on me.
"He sometimes used to love having his head and his
feet massaged — but this time he was far too impatient. I kept just
my bra and stockings on as we made love.
"He only managed it once but I didn't mind. He was 60
after all."
Sally revealed how Archer would use dirty movies to
get himself aroused.
"We used to make love on the sofa as he watched TV,"
she said. "I'm fairly broad-minded. I was quite all right about it.
"The good thing about Jeffrey was that he kept his
mind on the job. You never felt he was concentrating more on the
movie than he was on you."
Archer also longed for sex in unusual places —
especially in the House of Lords. "One day I had an appointment to
go to the Lords and he was going to be there too and we thought
‘This is it'," said Sally.
"I was standing outside the chamber when he came up
behind me and grabbed my bum. Jeffrey wanted to make love under a
table, and we looked and looked, but it is a busy place.
"I thought it would be a bit of fun if we could use
his ermine robe. I could lie on it and it would stop me getting
carpet burns."
Unfortunately for Archer, they ran out of time looking
for somewhere to do it.
"Poor old Jeffrey. There we both were, hot to trot and
we couldn't get it together. It was the only chance we had at the
House of Lords and I'm afraid we blew it."
Archer also wanted to make love in the lift at posh
West End restaurant Le Caprice. "He was a strange mixture of kinky
and straight," said Sally.
"But some things turned him off. I once suggested we
have telephone sex one night when I could not come over. His
reaction was ‘Yuk'.
"But I wasn't surprised. When it came to sex the most
the poor old stick ever managed with me was twice — he wasn't a
five-times-a-night stud."
Giggling
It seems Nikki's experiences were similar. When a
guest at their restaurant table asked her: "Well, what did you like
about Archer — it obviously wasn't the sex?", an embarrassed silence
fell.
"Nikki looked straight at Sally and they both burst
out laughing," said a nearby diner. "They were shaking their heads
and giggling, ‘Oh definitely not'."
All the Archer blondes now share is a mutual contempt
for him — and pity for another women whose life he touched — the
prostitute at the centre of his 1987 libel trial.
"I was good friends with Jeffrey's friend Michael
Stacpoole who told me that the politician had slept with Monica
Coghlan more than once," said Sally.
"This was before I had even met Jeffrey — but later,
when we had a relationship, he would refuse to discuss Monica.
"That woman's life was ruined by him and she went to
her grave known as a liar.
"She didn't deserve that. But he deserves everything
he gets."
By LOUISE OSWALD, ROBERT KELLAWAY & GLORIA
STEWART | 
