The Geek Code v0.1 (1/1)
Robert A. Hayden
Suggestions welcome.
Send them to:
Robert A. Hayden: <hay...@krypton.mankato.msus.edu>
GSS d- f-- p--/--p++ c++ m+/* s-/++ g+
------------------- The Code of the Geeks v0.1 --------------------------
So you think you are a geek, eh? The first step is to admit to yourself
your geekiness. No matter what anyone says, geeks are people too; geeks
have rights. So take a deep breath and announce to the world that you are a
geek. Your courage will give you strength that will last you forever.
How to tell the world you are a geek, you ask? Use the universal Geek code.
By joining the geek brotherhood, you have license to use this special code
that will allow you to let other un-closeted geeks know who you are in a
simple, codified statement.
---------------------
Type:
Geeks come in many flavors. The flavors relate to the vocation of the
particular geek. To identify this vocation, us the following codes:
GCS -- Geek of Computer Science
GE -- Geek of Engineering
GM -- Geek of Math
GMU -- Geek of Music
GB -- Geek of Business
GS -- Geek of Science (Physics, Chemistry, Biology, etc.)
GSS -- Geek of Social Science (Psychology, Sociology, etc.)
GO -- Geek of Other. Some types of geeks deviate from the
normal geek activities. This is encouraged as true geeks
come from all walks of life.
GU -- Geek of 'Undecided'. This is a popular vocation with
new freshmen.
----------------------
Dress:
Geeks come in many different types of dress.
d -- I dress a lot like those in Walmart ads
d+ -- I tend to wear trendy political messages like "Save the
Whales" or "Free South Africa".
d++ -- I wear 'proper' business attire while at work.
d+++ -- I wear formal attire (formal gown, tux, etc).
d- -- I tend to wear trendy political messages like "Nuke the
Humans", "Question Authoriry", or "Big Brother's
Watching".
d-- -- I wear jeans to work just to piss off my boss
d--- -- At work, I have holes in my jeans and/or obscenities on
my shirt.
----------------------
Fashion:
Along with dress, Geeks have a widely varried sense of fashion, from the
plain to the unbelievable.
f I tend to look a lot like Walmart advertisements.
f+ I shop at trendy specialty shops at the mall.
f++ I only wear things that have the word 'tres' or 'chic' in
the label.
f+++ I make regular trips to overpriced boutiques in Beverly
Hills in order to be as snobby as possible.
f- My clothes are a few years out of date because I don't buy
new ones, spending my money on more important things like
my computer.
f-- I tend to wear the first thing that I see when opening my
closet in the morning.
f--- I dress to displease. If I don't disgust my co-workers, I'm
not trying hard enough.
---------------------
Politics:
Just as the Geek's sense of fashion is varried, so is his/her political
convictions.
p Politics? I don't give a shit.
p+ Ronald Reagan/George Bush had it right
p++ Rush for pres!
p+++ Pat Buchanan is my hero!
p++++ Pat Robertson is way too liberal for me
p- Clinton has it right!
p-- I'm a 60's leftover
p--- Jesse Jackson is too conservative for me
p---- Anarchy U.S.A.
-p+ Don't label me you moron! Both sides are equally fucked up!
--p++ United We Stand, America!
---------------------
Computers:
Most geeks identify themselves by their use of computers and computer
networks. In order to quantify your geekiness level on computers, consult
the following (consider the term 'computers' synonymous with 'computer
network'):
c Computers are a tool, nothing more. I use it when it serves
my purpose.
c+ Computers are fun and I enjoy using them. I play a mean
game of Wing Commander and can use a word processor without
resorting to the manual too often. I know that a 3.5" disk
is not a hard disk. I also know that when it says 'press any
key to continue', I don't have to look for a key labeled 'ANY'.
c++ Computers are a large part of my existence. When I get up
in the morning, the first thing I do is log myself in. I mud
on weekends, but still manage to stay off of academic
probation.
c+++ You mean there is life outside of Internet? You're shittin'
me! I live for muds. I haven't dragged myself to class in
weeks.
c- Anything more complicated than my calculator and I'm
screwed.
c-- Where's the on switch?
c--- If you even mention computers, I will rip your head off!
-------------------
Music:
Musical interests vary widely, also.
m I like popular, top 40 selections, played softly, in the
background.
m+ Something sorta quiet or low-key, like Enya or Vangelis.
m++ I like good classical compositions and NPR.
m+++ I dig that elevator music.
m- Classic rock, man. Played really loud.
m-- Heavy metal, played even louder!
m--- How about some techno-rave-rap stuff!
m* Play me damn-near anything. I'll listen to it.
-------------------
Shape:
Geeks come in many shapes and sizes. Shape code is divided into two parts.
The first indicates height, while the second indicates roundness. Mix each
section to fit yourself.
s I'm an average geek
s+/+ I'm a little taller/rounder than most.
s++/++ I'm a basketball/linebacker candidate.
s+++/+++I usually have to duck through doors/I take up three movie
seats.
s-/- I look up to most people. Weight is no problem.
s--/-- I look up to damn near everybody. I tend to have to fight
against a strong breeze.
s---/---I take a phone book with me when I go out so I can see to
eat dinner. My bones are poking through my skin.
--------------------
Glasses:
Geeks have traditionally worn glasses.
g I have no glasses
g+ I've got four eyes, what's your point?
g++ I've got four eyes and tape in the middle
g+++ I have coke-bottle classes that I can use to start leaves on
fire in the hot sun.
g- I have contacts
g-- I have colored contacts
--------------------
--------------------
The Geek Code is copyright 1993 by Robert A. Hayden. All rights reserved.
You are free to distribute this code in electronic format provided that the
contents are unchanged and this copyright notice remains attached.
--
[> Robert Hayden ____ <] Black Holes result from God
[> \ /__ <] dividing the universe by zero.
[> hay...@krypton.mankato.msus.edu \/ / <]
[> aq...@slc4.INS.CWRU.Edu \/ <] # include std_disclaimer.h
Clive Jones
>
>Suggestions welcome.
Speaking personally, I find it hard to label myself in some of your
categories. Maybe this means I'm not a geek, but if I were being
honest I'd say I'm probably just a weird one. (-8
I interchangeably dress entirely respectably, in normal casual
clothing, or in lycra (see alt.lycra, which I am largely responsible
for in its current incarnation). Where this puts me on the clothing
scale is hard to decipher, since I try to make a slightly individual
fashion statement, while at the same time not being too worried by how
I look.
The politics category doesn't seem to work for those of us outside
America very much.
I don't think that Vangelis and Enya are in the same league as far as
low-key music is concerned, anyone who reckons Vangelis is low-key
hasn't heard Pulstar or Motion of the Stars, for example. (-8 Where
the heck do I go if I like Vangelis, Negativland, Propaganda, Queen,
Beethoven, Bach, and so on, but am still far too fussy to count as
"m*"?
GCS d-(--) f(---) -p+ c++ m? s/+ g
--Clive.
Alpha
I tend to disagree with this "code" thing, but I couldn't resist. The code
needs some refinement, but this is what I got:
GO d- f-- p-- c+ m* s-/- g+
alpha
May I suggest GT? (Theatre)--that would make me GT instead of GO.
--
Alpha/Spasmodic enthusiasm, sense of infallibility, brusque, neurotic, destruc-
tive, unbridled free expression, perverse self-will, hell-bent, compulsive,
impulsive, suspicious, hyper-vigilant, reactionary, violent, without remorse,
immature, insolent, intolerant, uncompromising--In other words, LUCID!!!
darren the beautiful
can properly relate my status to the world:
darren Chamberlain (dar...@csa.bu.edu):
GMU d--- f-- p-- c+ m* s g
--darren (in a white wine sauce)
Stephan Doyle
>can properly relate my status to the world:
GS GM- d f-/f-- p---- c+ m# s++/- g+
c'est moi steve (doyl...@garnet.berkeley.edu)
m# (new choice since miles wasnt an option)
>