the advantage of a public forum

[Michael Feir]

Hello everyone. Juliette has raised a point that we should all continue to be mindful of. This group is indeed a public forum. It's like having a mall or coffee shop we're all gathered in and should be treeted the same way. Anybody might decide to drop in. Also, what we write here remains available for public view. A good rule of thumb is to think how you would want history to remember you before you send a mesage. That will keep our worst impulses in check and stand us in better stead. That's why I encourage all of you to be thoughtful about what you write here. This is especially the case when you have more negative things to share. I've been a public figure online for well over a decade now. I published my old phone number, personal address and other information in a magazine I wrote called Audyssey. I've never had that come back to haunt me, but I don't recommend that any of you follow what I did. At the most, you should give out your email address if you want people to be able to contact you privately. Keep any other address information off the group other than perhaps which City you're in.

 

I cringe at some of the things I've read on the ODSP Fireside. If you want prime examples of unrestrained anger and scalding lashing words, look no further than that group. After you've done that, tell me this; Can you imagine you'd want to spend much time hanging around them socially? That's actually a more unfair question than you might think. I pose it to illustrate a point. There are something like eleven hundred people in that group and many of them are very generous people. The problem is that they only tend to show their needs and their perfectly admirable drive to try and effect change. The world needs to see more than that from us though. Having us all lumped together as miserable 24-7 may indeed work better for fundraising. However, it builds a wall of gloom around us which only particularly caring, curious or brave people tend to want to come through. Many people may toss money over that wall out of a sense of pitty, but very few will try to dig through it to reach us.

 

That wall of gloom shouldn't be there. It was unwittingly put there by others, some of whom meant well but don't realise what isolation it throws us into.. Some of us have grown so used to it that we strengthen that wall ourselves for fear of letting others in. Personally, I've seen nothing but good come of standing up publicly with my blog and other things I've published. It is my sincere hope that taking part in this group helps all of us to put ourselves more in the path of people who are too used to turning the other way.

 

I'd love to find people to hang out with who share my interest in documentaries I hear on the Discovery and History Channel. Speaking of Discovery, the space shuttle with that name is scheduled to fly its last mission some time soon. I heard it might be on November 30. I love tuning into the NASA stream on the Internet and hearing the shuttle take off and land through my computer speakers. The folks at NASA explain everything that is happening. One of these times, I'd love to share that thrill with someone else who likes space. However, geting people to take the time to come and visit me here seems to be like pulling teeth. Nearly everyone seems to look at me just long enough to see my white cane and then stop there.

 

What I offer all of you with this group is a chance to put the positive of yourselves out there as well as your hardships so that people don't have to go through as much of their misguided fear in order to get to know you. The more people get to know other aspects of my life than my blindness, the more I believe they'll want to overcome their fear and actually get to know me, the person who happens to be blind. Perhaps, one day, they might begin to think: "Why don't I invite Michael over for dinner or out to an event?" Perhaps, one day, if I'm very lucky, a special lady might come along and find me worthy of love. Perhaps, an employer might actually get to know enough about me to start imagining what I might do for him or her rather than what I might damage. The only hope I have to achieve that is to try and be part of history and not just an observer.

 

The more people from all honest walks of life who we can bring into the fold, the better. The whole point of this group is to share our humanity with each other and undo the world's attempt to keep us tucked away under the neat labels of needy and miserable. I want people to face the fact that we're fully human, capable of compassion and happiness in life despite our disabilities and needs. People have to realise that if they give us an opportunity, we can be valueable additions to their lives.

 

It should never have turned into a case of us and them. We're all people. All of us deserve to have more of our physical needs met. However, there are other human needs like that for companionship in life. We shouldn't let fundraisers and other people trying to help us make decisions in our name which make meeting our need for friendship harder. My friends are priceless to me. I'd gladly give up some extra cash if it meant that I could treet them to lunch somewhere. They've more than earned it by being there for me when I've needed them over the years. Making more friends and building up a network of people in our lives to help meet these needs and let us contribute to society however we're able to requires that these shadows disappear from around us.

 

To make these shadows go away, we have to shine brightly enough to quench them. That means being willing to share the best of yourselves with the world as well as your hardships. I know that for some of you, this is a new thought and it may take time for you to grow comfortable. I can only promise to be the very best host, moderator and guide for you into this new idea as my experience and good character permit me to be. I hope you'll stick around and participate. Juliette had been a terrific example and an inspiration to me. She's right though. We haven't heard much from Robert, Jacquei and Amy. Tell us a little about yourselves. What are your interests? What puts a smile on your faces? What do you enjoy doing? There's no rush if you're feeling a bit nervous. Nobody is going to kick you out for lurking or anything. When you feel safe and comfortable, speak up and share.

 

Michael Feir
Owner of Silver Smiles
Join and share the silver lining in your life.
Group home page: http://groups.google.com/group/silver-smiles
2010--
Author of Personal Power:
How Accessible Computers Can Enhance Personal Life For Blind People
2006-2008
www.blind-planet.com/content/personal-power

 

A Life of Word and Sound
2003-2007
http://www.blind-planet.com/content/life-word-and-sound
 
Creator and former editor of Audyssey Magazine
1996-2004
Check out my blog at:
www.michaelfeir.blogspot.com