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10 Laws

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HVAC

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Nov 14, 2012, 9:59:11 AM11/14/12
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Murphy's Ten Laws for String Theorists:

(1) If you fix a mistake in a mathematical superstring calculation,
another one will show up somewhere else.

(2) If your results are based on the work of others, then one such work
will turn out to be wrong.

(3) The longer your article, the more likely your computer hard disk
drive will fail while you are typing the references.

(4) The better your research result, the more likely it will be rejected
by the referee of a journal; on the other hand, if your work is wrong
but not obviously so, it will be accepted for publication right away.

(5) If a result seems to good to be true, it is unless you are one of
the top ten string theorists in the world. (By the way, these theorists
refer to their results as "string miracles".)

(6) Your most startling string-theoretic theorem will turn out to be
valid in only two spatial dimensions or less.

(7) When giving a string seminar, nobody will follow anything you say
after the first minute, but, if miraculously someone does, then that
person will point out a flaw in your reasoning half-way through your
talk and what will be worse is that your grant review officer will
happen to be in the audience.

(8) For years, nobody will ever notice the fudge factors in your
calculations, but when you come up for tenure they will surface like
fish being tossed fresh breadcrumbs.

(9) If you are a graduate student working on string theory, then the
field will be dead by the time you get your Ph.D.; Even worse, if you
start over with a new thesis topic, the new field will also be dead by
the time you get your Ph.D.

(10) If you discover an interesting string model, then it will predict
at least one low-energy, observable particle not seen in Nature.


In summary, anything in string theory that theoretically can go wrong
will go wrong, but if nothing does go theoretically wrong, then
experimentally it is ruled out. When in doubt, ask Harlow.




--
"OK you cunts, let's see what you can do now" -Hit Girl
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CjO7kBqTFqo .. 变亮
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hanson

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Nov 14, 2012, 12:02:22 PM11/14/12
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"HVAC" <hv...@physisist.net> wrote:
>
[Amened & applied to testable domains]

Murphy's Ten Laws for Relativity Theorists:

(1) If you fix a mistake in a mathematical relativity calculation,
another one will show up somewhere else.

(2) If your results are based on the work of others, then one such work
will turn out to be wrong.

(3) The longer your article, the more likely your computer hard disk
drive will fail while you are typing the references.

(4) The better your research result, the more likely it will be accepted
by the referee of a journal; on the other hand, if your work is wrong
but not obviously so, it still will be accepted for publication right away.

(5) If a result seems to good to be true, it is especially so if you are
one of the top ten Relativity theorists in the world. (By the way, these
theorists refer to their results as "Einstein miracles".)

(6) Your most startling SR/GR-theoretic theorem will turn out to be
valid in all spatial dimensions, even if they are zero or negative.

(7) When giving a Relativity seminar, nobody will follow anything
you say after the first minute, but, if miraculously someone does,
then that person will never point out a flaw in your reasoning
half-way through your talk and what will be great is that your grant
review officer will happen to be in the audience.

(8) For years, nobody will ever notice the fudge factors in your
Relativity calculations, but when you come up for tenure they
will disappear like fresh breadcrumbs being tossed to the fish.

(9) If you are a graduate student working on SR/GR theory,
then the field will be still alive by the time you get your Ph.D.;
Even better, if you start over with a new thesis topic, the new
field will also be still alive by the time you get your Ph.D.

(10) If you discover an interesting SR/GR model, then it will
predict all kinds of hi- & low-energy, observable particles not
seen in Nature.

In summary, anything in Relativity theory that theoretically can
go wrong will be right, so nothing does go experimentally
wrong, since it is theoretically ruled in.
When in doubt, ask Harlow.
--
"OK you cunts, let's see what you can do now" -Hit Girl
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CjO7kBqTFqo .. å ˜äº®
http://www.richardgingras.com/tia/images/tia_logo_large.jpg

a425couple

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Nov 16, 2012, 12:49:26 PM11/16/12
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"HVAC" <hv...@physisist.net> wrote in message...
> Murphy's Ten Laws for String Theorists: ----
> (3) The longer your article, the more likely your computer hard disk
> drive will fail while you are typing the references.

Well, I'll certainly agree with you on this coralary:

The longer, and more thoughtful, and more referenced and
cited a planned post is,
the more likely the computer is to have a 'hickey-up'
and lose it all!

Best wishes!
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