Vaccines R Killin Y'all
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"Rise Up, Patriots!" Rand Paul Calls To Intubated Patients Lying Unconscious
In Hospital ICU
WASHINGTON Rallying patients lying unconscious in the intensive care unit of
George Washington University Hospital, Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) called on those
intubated due to Covid-19 to rise up from their hospital beds and choose
freedom, sources confirmed Tuesday. “To all you brave patriots who have been
imprisoned in this ICU, I say join me and your fellow countrymen in rebelling
against this despotic medical system!” shouted Paul, a non-board-certified
ophthalmologist who represents a state in which more than 1,000 people are
hospitalized with Covid, before going on to urge every patient with acute
respiratory failure to join arm-in-arm and cast off the tyrannical yoke of
fear and propaganda. “Don’t you see? Those ventilators aren’t there to save
you, they’re meant to enslave you. They may look like innocent, artificial
breathing devices intended to provide you with you a steady supply of oxygen,
but they are the shackles of your oppressor. Rip out your breathing tube and
join the resistance!” At press time, dozens of Covid patients had reportedly
died after Paul attempted to reenact the Boston Tea Party by dumping their
discolored, hypoxic bodies into the Potomac.