JP: Cmdr Teller, Major Greaves, Lt Cmdr Ukinix - Fool’s Gold [Part 3]

[Wil Ukinix]

((“The Governor Vagh” Bar, Ultima Station - 32.5 hours until QSD recharge))

It was the last ever song to be played live by the Novian Skull Blowers.  They were almost at the end of a twenty-five minute rendition of their most popular song “Screeches of Eternity”, and everything on stage (including the performers) looked to be engulfed in huge flames, thanks to the state-of-the-art holographic stage projection system.

The lead singer was screaming with gusto.

Lead Singer: You’ll neee-veeeer heeeaaar the screeeeeeeeeeeee-eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeech until it’s too-laaaaaa-aaaaaate!!! Nnnnnnooooooooooooooooooooooooo aaaaarrrrrggggghhhhhhhh!

Every member of the band was violently running around the stage while playing their instruments, smashing into equipment and each other.

The floor nearest the stage was swarmed with people and Wes had to elbow a few ribs to make it back to his compatriots with the latest round. Three shots of, probably terrible, tequila in blue and green clear plastic. Finally breaking through a particularly stubborn pack of orions, the Marine finally rejoined Wil and Geoff in time to see an amused Wil turn to Teller with a chuckle.

Ukinix: ::Raised voice:: THEY’RE GOING OFF!  CHECK IT OUT!

Geoff had managed to achieve just the correct amount of drunken enthusiasm to suffer the aural assault with a smile.  It was a hell of a show but the opportunities for conversation were...limited at best.  

Teller: I CAN’T BELIEVE THE LEAD SINGER ATE A TIME CRYSTAL FROM BORETH JUST SO HE COULD BE TEN MINUTES YOUNGER TO DO THE SOLO...AGAIN! 

The music was so loud that reading lips was proving to be a better strategy for communication;  which would have been plausible if the lights weren’t flickering between depths-of-your-soul-black and blinding sunlight every fifth of a second. 

Greaves: NO, NO, NO. HE ATE A TIME CRYSTAL FROM BORETH!

Ukinix: NAH, IT WAS A TIME CRYSTAL FROM *BORETH*.

Teller: I DON’T CARE ABOUT HIS BREATH!

Greaves: THIS IS LEGIT! HE BASICALLY TOLD THE FREAKIN TEMPORAL INVESTIGATIONS TO GO--

The credendo of the singer’s voice drowned out whatever Wes was going to say as the floor literally shook with the intensity. It wasn’t long before the holographic projectors were taking a beating.  Literally.  The band members were throwing anything they could at the projectors.  Flames disappeared from the stage segment by segment as each projector was destroyed.

Teller: NEVER GONNA GET THE DEPOSIT BACK ON THOSE….

Ukinix: IT’S AWESOME!

Next it was the various equipment around the stage.  The music, already heavy and distorted, got even more distorted, much to the cheers of the crowd.  It wasn’t long before a bunch of support crew that were side of stage pushed what looked like a computer core on a grav sled.  The band members were each handed what appeared to be photonic batons.  They each started bashing the computer core.  Smoke began bellowing from the unit, as the former music which could now only be called “sound” got louder and more distorted. Geoff was bemused and incensed in equal measure.  

Teller: THAT IS NOT THE CORRECT REPAIR PROCEDURE FOR THAT MODEL, YOU’VE GOT TO HIT IT HARDER!  

Ukinix:  LET’S GIVE ‘EM A HAND!

Greaves: ARE YOU CRAZY? THERE’S LIKE FOUR NAUSICAANS!

Teller: YOU’RE RIGHT WE’LL BE GENTLE ON ‘UM! 

Wil gave Teller a bit of a push, to begin the forceful foray to the front of the stage through the packed crowd.  Once there, Wil grabbed Teller’s arm to shift the pair a few metres to the left away from the Nausicaan security guard, before giving Teller a nod.  As quickly as he could, Wil placed his hands on the edge of the stage, before grabbing Geoffrey by the arm and taking him up with him.

It was at that moment that Wes realized he’d made a critical error. He was not the most inebriated person in the group. Worse yet, it looked like he was the most sober one. The curse of responsibility that came with being sober was wholly distasteful and therefore he did the only logical thing. Wes Greaves downed all three shots and chased after the others.  Geoff managed to see this out of the corner of his eye from his new vantage point on stage and offered Wes a cheer of support.  

Teller: DAMN THE NAUSICAANS AND FULL SPEED AHEAD!  

By the time he’d fought his way to the stage, Wil and Teller were already up, with at least one security guard moving quickly in from the side. 

Wil stood up, and put his fists in the air in victory, before grabbing a nearby microphone stand, then standing on the computer core and bashing it as hard as he could.  The Nausicaan security person was now up on stage eyeing Wil and Geoffrey, but held back when he saw one of the band members offer his hand for a high five to both of the two former engineers.  Wil recognised “Sigeric,” the band’s guitarist he had met on Donova IV, and he hoped that Sigeric recognised him.   Sigeric then handed Geoffrey and Wil a baton each, before he turned to grab a nearby guitar to belt the computer core with.  Wil looked at Geoffrey, before shrugging, and then began smacking the baton into the computer core as hard as he could.

The slow and violent destruction of the computer core caused an intensely loud, low pitched feedback to blast from the on-stage and venue speakers.  Through the billowing smoke Wil could see that Teller was trying to say something.

Teller: APPLIED….ENGINEERING….IS BEST….ENGINEERING….

Ukinix: ::Waving hand in front of mouth, coughing:: WHAT’D YOU SAY?! IT’S FREAKING LOUD!

Teller: I SAID….

The sound finally died down, and the amount of smoke reduced.  The ex-shuttle’s computer core was finally dead.  As the audience began loudly cheering and applauding the band, the Nausicaan security guard approached Wil and Geoffrey, and politely gestured for them to get off of the stage.

Once on the ground, they joined in applauding the band, who were themselves back to the audience to thank them.  Eventually, they made their way off stage, and the lights of the venue came up - albeit dimly.

Greaves: YOU TWO ARE FULL ON INSANE. 

Ukinix: SORRY, MAJOR, I SHOULD HAVE WARNED YOU GEOFFREY GETS OUT OF CONTROL WHEN WE GET TOGETHER!

Teller: SORRY WES, BEEN A WHILE SINCE I’VE GOTTEN TO RELAX OFF DUTY, HOPE THIS WASN’T TOO MUCH FUN FOR YOU!  

Greaves: NO, NO. IN A GOOD WAY. THE BEST OF WAYS! I HAVEN’T HAD THIS MUCH FUN IN FIVE YEARS.

Teller: WHY WOULD YOU NEED TO BRING A GUN?  

Ukinix: I’M GOING TO GO TO THE LOO.

Geoff stopped and looked at his friend directly, trying to follow his mouth moving.  Even with the concert over there was a thunderous ringing in his ears that was not diminishing at all.  

Teller: I can’t hear a damn thing!  

Ukinix:  A WEE.  I HAVE TO GO TAKE A LEAK.

Teller: Fine, but I’m going with you!  And we’re not going to a zoo!  

Geoff and Wil pushed through the crowd, heading towards what was either a long line for the bar or a relatively short one for the restroom.  Somewhere along the way the crowd separated them from Wes, but Geoff waved towards the bar with a promise they’d soon return and have one, or several, for the road before heading back to the shuttleport.  

((Several minutes later, outside the restroom))

As Wil exited the bathroom, he looked up to see a Pakled male staring straight at him, his face only centimetres away.

Nev: I am ambushing you!

Ukinix: ::Blinking eyes, puzzled:: Um --- ::pointing thumb over shoulder:: Nah, the bathroom’s through that door-

Geoff stumbled out of the multicolored cloud of stench wafting from the facilities and directly into the back of his friend Wil, who had come to a complete halt outside the doors.  

Teller:  If you can call it that, place is basically just a hole out to space and I’m fairly sure I heard screams…

Nev:  You are tiny!  I am ambushing you too!  

Geoff’s addled hearing and alcohol soaked brain didn’t react very quickly and had only gotten as far as wondering why a Pakled was pointing something that looked suspiciously like a frying pan at him before it was bashed into his skull with a resounding gong.  His last thought before losing consciousness was how much the gong of the pan on Wil’s skull sounded like the Skull Blowers last drum solo.  

Nev looked with satisfaction at the two collapsed piles at his feet, certain that Gracie Snorlan would be thrilled he had successfully captured not one but two humans...at least one of which looked like the holoimage he’d been given.  He hoisted both unconscious figures over his shoulder easily and began shuffling towards the nearby entrance to the station's service corridors, scream-singing the last Skullblower tune loudly enough to be heard over the din of the crowd.  

TBC...

=======================================================================

Commander Geoffrey Teller
Executive Officer
USS Thor - NCC 82607
Commodore A. Kells, Commanding
V239509GT0

&

Major Wes Greaves
Marine Detachment Commander
Chief of Security & Tactical
USS Thor - NCC 82607
E239702WG0

&

Lieutenant Commander Wil Ukinix
Starfleet attaché and First Officer
Amity Outpost
V239511WU0