Lt. JG Om-Zora - Flying into a clear glass window at full speed.
Ace Christensen
((Clean Hall Lounge, Deck 6, USS Ronin))
Beck: Change of subject. When you're not doing whatever it is you do, what do you like to do to unwind? Personally, I am a big fan of the holodeck - there's an endless supply of potential adventures or entertainments to engage the mind. And I don't have the time for it I used to, but I do like writing holoadventures myself.
Holodecks were useful, and at times when there were no other ways to decompress, it was nice. It was also extremely beneficial for work. But Om-Zora found a preference for finding things to do outside of it lest there be a risk of falling under the delusion that a Holodeck was more than a simulation, and that real life was anything like it.
Om-Zora didn’t fault people for having a different opinion about it, though. Holodecks were a part of life in this age, and the association wasn’t a negative one. It was just that Om-Zora didn’t use them as often as some people did. Not to mention that Vulcans didn’t often have holodecks built for recreational use on their ships. Only professional use. In some ways, it was easier now to fill time without it.
None of that was said out loud.
Evinrude: I found a lot of solace in the holodeck, especially growing up on starships and starbases. As a kid, teenager...it let me explore more than just the standard-pattern corridors of the Galaxy class I lived aboard.
Beck: Response
Evinrude: Well, from the perspective of someone who used to create them...I'm aware of the temptation. But, kind of like me choosing to...pick a different path in life for a while, before returning to Starfleet...the experiences we live in the holodeck color and modify our real-world perspectives.
Beck: Response
Robin: ::Looking at Om-Zora:: Anything to add sweetie?
Om-Zora: ::slightly slurred:: Lovely answers, all of you. But I politely decline talkin’ about myself. My interests are no one’s business but mine. Wrong bird if you wanna talk to someone who likes sharin’.
Robin: It would be nice though, right? I mean, I hardly care for the topic Neverrude and Becky are engaged in. I wish to hear your voice more.
Beck/Evinrude: Response
Om-Zora: I mean, with one exception in the room, we’re only colleagues. It’s not like y’need to know about me on a personal level. ‘nd I’d prefer you didn’t.
Om-Zora hated how bad the slurring was getting, and there was a deep embarrassment felt just by being there with people who liked talking. Not because of Robin, of course. Robin was the only one there keeping Om-Zora from showing a deeper anxiety in front of everyone. But that physical anxiety wasn’t helping, and getting up without the dizziness wasn’t possible yet.
And yet, almost of its own accord, Om-Zora’s wing leaned toward Robin’s comforting pat. Maybe staying here wasn’t a completely terrible thing.
Beck/Evinrude: Response
Om-Zora: If it pleases you, then fine. What made you choose your jobs? What kind of people are you? Anything to distract me from the head swimming. And damn, is there any water around here? I… definitely need some.
Robin: ::shouting:: Mother, tepid water please.
Thoné: BARMAN!!!!!!!
A skinny looking barman came rushing from the kitchen with a jug of water and a few clean glasses.
Beck/Evinrude: Response
Robin: Please drink up sour cakes.
Om-Zora was fully capable of drinking the water; however, to keep the peace and not risk dropping a glass, a decision was made internally to allow Robin to help anyway. Embarrassing as it may have been.
oO It’s not like it can get any more embarrassing than this. Oo
The Aurelian decided to listen to what the other two had to say, anyway. Trying to be careful about not chugging the water and simply hearing what people’s answers were. What people’s thoughts were. Maybe hoping no one turned that question back and hoped to hear Om-Zora answer the same.
At least not yet.
Beck/Evinrude: Response
It was intriguing, and a decision was made to take a break from the water to tune in a little more.
But there was also some distraction. The touch to Om-Zora’s neck as that shy droplet of water slid down, and Robin caught it with her finger, was soothing. Om-Zora would blame it on being drunk that there was a lean into the touch.
Robin: Better?
There was nearly a smile.
Om-Zora: ::Softly and with the most genuine feeling shown all evening:: You do know how to make a girl swoon.
Om-Zora didn’t immediately notice the actual words that left. There were a few seconds of just feeling good about it. Genuinely good. Comfortable, almost. And then…
oO Wait… Oo
Beck/Evinrude/Robin: Response
The delay was short as the realization hit in the middle of someone else talking. Felt somewhat like flying directly into a clear glass window at full speed. Om-Zora’s eyes widened, hand covering beak. There were a lot of feelings just then. Relief. Three decades of burden, seemingly lifted in an instant at the admission. Simultaneously, a nearly unfathomable degree of mortification that there were people around for so personal an epiphany.
There was an urge to correct it. But it seemed dishonest to act like it was a joke. It felt like she had been lying to herself for years, and couldn’t quite manage trying to express the concept of a joke about it, anyhow.
And it felt nice to say it. It felt right. Something she hadn’t felt in a very long time. When was she allowed to have a nice, easy feeling? But certainly she did not want to feel any of it in the present company, with maybe the exception of one. The show of vulnerability was simply unacceptable.
She didn’t even know if anyone else noticed. But it didn’t matter at all if they noticed or not, she definitely felt it anyway.
She wanted to be much calmer about it, come up with a “logical” reason to suddenly leave. But the experience was a sobering slap of adrenaline, and a deep need to leave this space immediately. Logic be damned. She would have to consider later whether leaving a meal unfinished when it was very good was a major offence to Klowahkan culture or not, and make it up to both Robin and Zeyva after the fact.
She made sudden, desperate eye contact only with Robin, and it was a look that couldn’t have expressed “I’m so sorry” any better than if she’d said it outright.
Om-Zora: I have to leave. Right now. I-I just… I need a minute.
She would have asked Robin to follow directly, but she was very overwhelmed and didn’t think she had many words to speak anyway.
Beck/Evinrude/Robin: Response
Om-Zora’s only sense of being careful was to make sure she didn’t knock anything over or stumble upon standing. It was surprisingly graceful, though not without some lightheadedness. And while the movement was fast enough, she didn’t actually run. Just made her way out. She didn’t apologize to the other two. She didn’t even look at them. Couldn’t look at them. Not when she was thinking exclusively in strings of curse words that weren’t altogether appropriate for a PG-13 audience as she left The Clean Hall.
Tags / [Ending this scene for Om-Zora. For now.]
—
(OOC 1: This choice has been sitting with me for a bit now for Om-Zora. Multiple months, in fact. Little over 4 months at this point. Freya can confirm. At least half of that was during the mission, though, so it wasn’t the right time to just do it out of nowhere. But Om-Zora is trans. So I figured now is as good a time as any to do a pronoun swap for her, as I’ve been thinking about it for A While. There are one or two sims that I kind of consider as being set “before” this one, that I will still use the other pronouns for until the end of those scenes, because up to this point, those pronouns were accurate to Om-Zora’s experience in the moment. Which might be confusing to some. But as someone who isn’t cisgender either, gender experiences in general are weird and wonky in terms of how people go through it. It do be like that sometimes. Outside of those sims, however, Om-Zora will be using she/her pronouns moving forward in new scenes. If you slip up once in a while, don’t worry about it too much. Muscle memory when typing is real, and I may even be stupid and slip up a time or two while adjusting. Just be aware of it, and do your best as you go. Otherwise, you’ll probably start looking crazy when responding to Om-Zora at a certain point.
OOC 2: Sorry to the other people in this scene for responding this quickly. It’s just that I saw the right moment for it. And if someone else responded first, it wouldn’t have worked.)
Lt. JG Om-Zora
Science Officer
USS Ronin
J239802D12
Pronouns: They/she (player), She/her (character)