Commander Foster - Tables Turned
Jamie LeBlanc
(( Sol's Apartment - San Francisco District - Starbase 118 ))
McLaren: Sounds like a familiar frame of mind...
His antennae tipped forward, and for a moment his gaze fell upon the tiny reminders that the Borg had left on her body. He knew that she knew how it felt. That was something they shared, painful as it was – it brought them closer together.
Foster: In a way, I think I did die. In that psychologically the old me, the me that wasn’t strong enough to handle it died and a new me stepped forward. One that could handle change better, one that assessed my unhealthy habits, one that admitted I couldn’t do everything alone and was determined to do better with the help of others.
Which was how he was reframing a past that had almost broken him. Almost but not quite. He admitted he had played a role in that past, and a new framework helped him understand how he affected his past decisions and how past events affected him.
McLaren: :: teasingly :: Sounds like some of us grew more than others, Wyn. :: She chuckled. :: I think you handled it well.
He tinted just a shade navy.
Foster: ::he chuckled:: I know that’s a weird, metaphysical way to put it. But life feels different now. Even though there’s more work and the work is more difficult, life itself feels easier.
McLaren: Sometimes all you need is a little perspective.
He chuckled a bit, taking a moment to try some of the tea.
Foster: Or to have the galaxy beat you over the head with a perspective bat a few dozen times. Six of one, half a dozen of the other.
McLaren: So then, with this new perspective, how do you think you’re doing so far with everything?
He sucked a breath in though his teeth.
Foster: Nobody’s died yet.
McLaren: ?
Tipping both antennae and his head forward in a double nod he waved a hand and acquiesced to the point that it wasn’t a very serious answer.
Foster: I think overall it’s gone OK. I’m very proud of the crew, and our mission was successful. That tells me that I’m doing OK, even if I’m at the same time making mistakes. ::he indulged in another sip of tea:: I’m still new at this but I know enough to know all the stuff I don’t know and be humbled by it.
McLaren: ?
Foster: yeah, I’ll take that over being overconfident because I know nothing. Been there, done that.
He would never say he was a wise person in his youth. Being a tremendously smart person wasn’t quite the same as being a wise person.
Then again he might argue that he wasn’t smart either – merely incredibly talented at medicine. Everything else he had to work for.
McLaren: ?
Foster: Honestly, I’d like to hear your opinion. Because if there’s one thing I have learned it’s that every one of us lives in our own heads – and we can’t see ourselves from the outside. So we need to cross check ourselves with people we trust.
And he trusted her, that went without saying.
McLaren: ?
He tipped his antennae forward, listening.
Foster: That is helpful. For sure. I appreciate it. ::he drew in a breath and with another sip of tea turned back to her:: And if the tables were turned – how would you rate your performance as a executive officer. Not as a Director of Intel because everyone agrees you’re excellent at that.
There was no sharpness to his tone, just a playful curiosity, Playful in the tables turning, curious in the rest.
McLaren: ?
~*~
tags/tbc
~*~
Commander Shar’Wyn Foster
Commanding Officer
~Julian Beck
E239010ST0