Ensign Sera - Dill of the Day
Hope Forster
Sera put on gloves, and picked up the pickle to set it on a close-by table. Then removed her glove swiftly as whatever was coating this pickle burned through it.
Dekas: ::to Kettick:: I think your idea of reviewing unauthorized code is an excellent idea. And we should see who last did maintenance on this thing because clearly they did it wrong.
Sera: ::watching her start to tingle and discolor from whatever that vegetable abomination was coated in:: I question whether maintenance has been done at all…this…this is not a normal replicator malfunction.
Kettick : And that is assuming someone careless enough to eat a cocktail sandwich during a maintenance would have some respect left for proper procedure and remember to log their misdeeds properly. :: He peered at the open panel and pointed to another foreign body next to a mass of singed wiring :: Is that a paper clip?
Sera: A paperclip? But…it has no grounding, no protective coating…the power that could arc through it…
Dekas: You know I've made a few jokes in my day about being someone who could fix something with a paperclip, but I didn't actually think someone would ever try it on something. I admire the tenacity, but this was a bad time to try it. If someone even did. Got any hypothesis as to what happened here?
Kettick's feelers bristled in professional indignation.
Kettick : Either the Heisenberg compensator matrix is faulty and bits of the replicated product materialize outside of the targeted area, or someone needs to be fired post-haste.
The Aurelian nodded.
Sera: As this is considered a freshman-level device to troubleshoot/maintain, I cannot say that I would be against this firing you speak of – although, for sake of transparency, I am uncertain what exactly fired means in this scenario.
Kettick : ::Deadpan, or deadly serious was anybody's guess:: I believe aft torpedo launcher two is available.
Dekas snorted.
Sera: For the replicator or the someone who needs to be fired? Is this what you meant? Fired out of a torpedo launcher? ::raises brow::
A wet plopping noise was heard as the pickle melted its way through the tabletop it has been perched on and was now softly sizzling on the carpeting.
Sera: We are going to need something that can withstand whatever form of acid that…vegetable is coated in.
The Vulcan walked over to the first aid box, which the department seemed to go through at an alarming pace, and pulled out some cleansing wipes for her hand.
Sera: Should we ask for an emergency transport of the glowing sweet dill? I believe it may be…over death, but it would negate the issue of it eating through the decking.
Dekas: I don’t think we need to go that far. It would be nearly impossible that this replicator has replicated an acid previously unknown to us. We need to neutralize it. So we’re going to need a base. Then we dispose of it properly, and maybe visit sickbay
for a few minutes if we touched it. If it turns out this is the error of a person and not just an odd malfunction, we skip the torpedo launcher this time, I'm not sure the court marshal would be worth the trouble. Instead, we write a strongly worded staff
review and get that person out of Engineering. We could always use more scientists. Clearly, that's what they were going for here.
He chuckled and looked down at his shirt as it was getting a hole burned in it from when he’d wiped his hand there.
With a wary eye on the vegetal wonder, Kettick walked towards the workbench he had been working on and picked up his PADD and a pot of water-based lubricant.
Kettick: I do not suppose anyone was working on a Science tricorder that would allow us to analyze the substance in question?
Sera: Response
The Remmilian gave a fatalistic gesture while he carefully applied the lubricant on his antennae.
Dekas: I bet some sort of sodium hydroxide or potassium hydroxide base might do the trick. Those are used in certain types of cleaners, that’s an easy enough thing to replicate. ::he narrowed his eyes at the offending replicator:: On a working replicator, obviously.
Kettick: Please don't. Without knowing what substance we are dealing with, there is no way for us to know how exothermic the reaction would be, nor what kind of dangerous gases or other byproducts it could emit.
Sera tilted her head in deference to Kettick’s comment. He wasn’t wrong, and the last thing main engineering needed was to be overcome with noxious fumes on top of toxic pickles.
Sera: Regardless, we need to do something with the offending vegetable before it invades the Chief Science Officer’s office or damages the navigational deflector below us.
Dekas: Response
Kettick remained silent for a little while, shielding his mouth from view with his unoccupied hand.
Kettick: That being said, the fine folks in the Science department have the means to analyze this substance, and a working replicator designed to produce what is needed to neutralize it. May I?
He picked the sizzling pickle with his impromptu tweezers, and held it at eye level, curious as to the effect the unknown substance would have on what was used as construction material on Remmil VI.
Sera continued to wipe at her hand as the burning subsided…a little – so either whatever was burning her hand was losing its’ potency, or she was doing a most satisfactory job of ignoring it.
Sera did not want to look down and acknowledge what damage, if any, her hand had sustained, what was the Earth idiom, ‘ignorance is bliss?’
Sera: Are your tongs suitable to stop whatever the pickle is secreting, Ensign Kettick?
Kettick: Response
Dekas: Response
Sera glanced over to Dekas and watched as one of his brilliantly scarlet feathers fell from his hand and floated to the ground. That got him a second look, and Sera noted that his uniformed jacket was losing the battle with whatever it was he had smeared on it to get the coating off his feathers. This was going well.
Kettick: In the meantime, I would suggest we use a containment field. I know for a fact there is one keeping an apocalyptic quantity of unreacted anti-matter perfectly safe a short way from us.
Sera: oO I never thought I would be uttering this Oo Then we should begin setting up a level 5 containment field to protect the rest of the ship from this…this…pickle. ::as she gestured, her eye caught sight of her hand. It wasn’t eaten to the bone, which was comforting, as she was rather fond of all of her extremities, but she was going to require a visit to sick bay when this ‘crisis’ had been averted.::
Dekas/Kettick: Response
Tags/TBC
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Ensign Sera
Engineering Officer
USS Juneau – NX 99801
J239812S14