Zarah Johnson - "Pranking Options"
Amanda Nordstrom
((Yinn’s Quarters, Deck 6, USS Octavia E. Butler))
Zarah was determined to get her prank finished before the officers of the OEB were called to their next mission. Part of the reason was because she’d planned to do one, only to have wrenches thrown into her plans. Now, however, she knew it was going to happen, come hell or high water, and she wanted Yinn to be on it. Doing a prank would be so much more fun with a minion, and Yinn was a minion among minions! They could be minions together!
The problem was, what to do? LIfe had intervened, but Zarah had a brief break from her studies, which added to the crunch time. If she didn’t do it then, she’d likely be too busy to do it later and months would pass before she got another chance. That was why she headed over to Yinn’s - that, and because to pull a prank, they needed to figure out exactly how to go about it.
Johnson: Did you have any idea on what to do?
Yinn: I have been turning a few ideas over in my head. Given how often the holodecks malfunction, it'd be pretty easy to wreak havoc there. But I almost froze to death the last time that happened to me, so it feels more cruel than fun to put someone else through that.
Yinn rubbed the ridge upon her head and Zarah canted her head slightly, giving the woman a minute to finish her thought.
Yinn: But then I thought of the replicators.
Johnson: Oh! That could be fun! Tamper the replicator so it doesn’t do what it’s supposed to!
Zarah could just imagine a bunch of goo oozing out and covering the unsuspecting victim, in that case, the new Intelligence Director, who would then be forced to shower. The image she conjured was funny enough, with that perfectly placed hair flat against head, tendrils of slime trickling off of outstretched arms, while an expression of disbelief clouding the face, she couldn’t help but giggle.
Yinn: That was my first thought too, just have them endlessly spewing the messiest food we can think of. But that's too obvious, and after the initial mess, the replicator gets fixed, the victim cleans up, and that's the end of it. I have something more devious in mind.
With eyes flashing, Zarah leaned forward, a grin spreading wide over her face. There were reasons why she liked Yinn, and this was one of them - when she did something, she was all in.
Johnson: I like devious. Tell me what you’re thinking!
Yinn: Every replicator on the ship is coded to our personal preferences. If I ask for stew, I'm always going to get one with Bolian seafood, not the land animals you humans eat. So if we can hack our victim's preferences...
Johnson: Then we can change everything to something they don’t expect!
She paused, then her expression brightened as she added.
Johnson: Or they get only one thing every time!
Yinn: Exactly. Everywhere on the ship, all hours of day, anything they ask for, they get the same thing. Just a cold, raw arvaditum, every time. Or whatever the most boring Earth vegetable is. Or a hot, steaming plate of zherlac — it's a Bolian fish that even Bolians think is an acquired taste. It has a very pungent order. Very pungent.
Yinn was a genius, and Zarah couldn’t help but clap her hands and rub them together while eliciting a soft, maniacal laugh. She knew she had made the right choice in bringing Yinn as her partner, and this only helped solidify that thought.
Johnson: Oh that is perfect! Perfect! Zherlac for breakfast, zherlac for lunch, zherlac for dinner, and zherlac for dessert! It’s fantastic!
Yinn: Response
Johnson: Right, so now we have to not only figure out how to do it, but in a way that we don’t get caught.
That was the hardest part about the entire operation, but Zarah knew where there was a will, there was a way. They would just have to do some more brainstorming.
Yinn: Response
Johnson: I don’t have the privileges to make that kind of change.
She paused, then added.
Johnson: But my mom does.
Yinn: Response
-- Zarah Johnson Civilian USS Octavia E. Butler M239008AD0
