LtJG Gila Sadar - An Oathbreaker and a Traitor
Gila Sadar
((XO’s Office - Deck 2 - USS Artemis-A))
Sadar: I’m here to… R-Report on the incident on Ki Baratan in 2374, and to- ::deep breath:: Submit myself for my disciplinary hearing and subsequent court martial. ::quivering voice:: Please accept my resignation.
Gila didn’t look up at the Lieutenant Commander after she’d presented the PADD, instead looking down at her folded hands in her lap, her fingers occupied with the continuous twisting of her obsidian ring which her official resignation had caused. Was there regret involved? Absolutely. By resigning her commission, she was proving everyone who had put their faith in her abilities to get the job done wrong, but she saw no other course.
If her senior officers couldn’t trust her, she had no place aboard this vessel, or in Starfleet at all.
A movement before her made her eyes inch ever so slightly upwards, and she noted the Lieutenant Commander hand held out in a pausing motion.
Dakora: Whoa, OK. Let's just slow down here for a moment. I appreciate the report on your experience during our recent CloQ incident, but I'm afraid you lost me on the whole court-martial/resignation part. Care to elaborate?
Elaborate? ELABORATE!?
Sadar: V-Very well… ::awkward pause as she attempts to put her many thoughts and feelings in order:: A-As I’m sure you gathered, Commander Adea and his team - consisting of Lieutenant Jovenan, Ensign Gnai and myself - found ourselves in Ki Baratan in 2374 on the day that Senator Vreenak returned to Romulus to publicize the results of his talks with the Dominion. This was in direct conflict with established history, as ::eyes the Commander:: per our investigation, the Senator was supposed to have been… ::voice fades::
What was she supposed to say? Had the negligence to put to writing what Benjamin Sisko had done been a deliberate choice by the United Federation of Planets, to prevent the complete ruin of their diplomatic relations with the Romulans - rocky as they were - or was it simply that Captain Sisko had never told anyone what he’d done? Now that the senior staff of the Artemis knew the truth - or at least the truth as had presented to them by CloQ - what were they supposed to do with it? Should they acknowledge it? Make it public knowledge?
oO A question for a later day Oo
Sadar: A-A-Anyway… Hoping to set time right, the team arrived at the conclusion that the assassination of the Senator was inherently necessary in order for the Romulans to join the war effort, and we- ::shaky breath:: The team chose to pursue that.
oO The team, the team. Still trying to deflect. Oo
Sadar: We proceeded with this plan and gained access to a planetary defense turret, with which the plan was to shoot down the Senator’s vessel and frame the act on the Dominion through some replicated Dominion-issue equipment we’d place in the turret.
Her mind’s eye went back in time - no CloQ necessary for that - as she watched the inner mechanics of the turret hum to life in that oppressively magenta coloring, heard Commander Adea and the Lieutenant’s voices from the second level, saw Ensign Gnai perform its duty by her side.
She felt her heart swell with terror and profound sadness.
Sadar: I-I… I could’ve stopped it, Sir. I wanted to stop it.
oO Violence is the cursed spring from which all suffering flows Oo
Sadar: As Starfleet officers, we are bound by our code of conduct to the ideals of peace. The values we’re supposed to honor and defend are truth, fairness and equality. My oath as a Doctor is to ‘do no harm’, and yet, as a junior officer, I’m supposed to assist my commanding officer in all endeavors to the best of my ability.
oO Against the currents of time, only cooperation and unison can see us safe. Discord would see all drown, but together, we will float. Oo
Sadar: ::increasingly shrill voice:: I was raised in a culture where pushing someone is considered an act of deviance that requires an inquiry into the resocialization of the aggressor! We have two dozen tenets dedicated to denouncing violence and promoting peace and non-aggression, but we have almost as many enforcing the necessity of following orders and doing what is considered best for the unit!
Gila felt the area around and behind her eyes sting as her lacrimal glands started producing tears, but she pushed back the instinct with disgust. She refused her body’s attempt at addressing her turbulent emotional state - she would not accept any self-soothing out of this issue - and kept her ground. Against her own bodily functions, surely that was allowed?
Dakora: Doctor Sadar. Gila, ::Beat.:: First, let me just say that what happened to you and the rest of those trapped with you wasn't fair. You were subjected to an unprecedented and, frankly, impossible situation.
Fair or not, what did it say of her as a person and as an officer that she had been unable to stop it? Or that she had tried to in the first place?
Dakora: But there is nothing here that necessitates a court martial OR a resignation.
Everything in her body told her to accept the conclusion of the First Officer. He was her superior officer - second only to the Captain herself - and his word was as much law as Captain MacKenzie’s was.
And yet, in her emotional state, she could do nothing to impede the kernel of sin residing in her stomach, that element of rebelliousness that had led her to this awful position in the first place, and she resisted. Not consciously, mind, but before she’d even realized what she was doing, she was arguing.
Sadar: ::quieted down:: We had other options, Sir… CloQ said so. We had a number of options available to us, but we defaulted to the most violent and most deplorable one, in direct violation of every oath I have ever taken, to my people, to my culture, to Starfleet and to my duty as a Medical Officer… ::voice cracking:: In light of that, p-please.
Lieutenant Commander Dakora offered her a sad smile as he tapped a few commands into his console. Soon enough, he pulled the holographic display around so that she could see it. It was a historical record. On the assassination of Senator Vreenak.
‘Assassinated by Dominion forces en-route to Romulus following diplomatic talks.’
Dakora: Vreenak wasn't killed on Ki Baratan, in 2374. What you– what we experienced wasn't real. ::His face darkened.:: Even if it really felt like it.
Well, neither was he killed by Dominion forces, but then, she didn’t feel like going into a longer debate about the unreliable nature of historical records written by a single faction. That was not what she was in his office to discuss in the first place.
Sadar: ::shameful voice:: I would’ve betrayed my team, Sir… I-In some ways, I suppose.. I already did. At the last second, I backpedaled. I felt that what we were doing was wrong, at the very core of my being, and I searched for a way to stop the operation. I was unable to locate one, but if I had-
Dakora: Response
Sadar: My team would’ve been in grave danger, because of me. ::hides her face in her hands:: If my senior officers can’t trust me to follow orders, to have their back, then I have no place here.
Dakora: Response
Sadar: The worst part is... I can't tell what's worse. That I tried to stop it, or that I failed in doing so...
Dakora: Response
Tags/TBC
LtJG Gila Sadar
Medical Officer
USS Artemis-A
A240006GS1