Lt Alex Storm - Empty Arms in the Rain

[Karen Morris]

((Time Index - After Alex returns from Kelara Station))

((Transporter Room, Deck 4, USS Artemis))

Two, shimmering columns of light appeared on the transporter pad, depositing a Bajoran and a Betazoid in a rainsoaked slicker with a duffel clutched in her right fist.  

The female transporter operator offered a smile and a …

Transporter operator: Welcome back, Lieutenant Storm.

Alex’s eyes found the door and she marched that direction, her jaw twitching. Her eyes looked like a puffer fish halfway through deflating after its alarm. The doors swished open in front of her and slammed behind her with a note of finality.

Starfleet issue boots tramped through the corridor scattering the few people in her path like bowling pins. She threw back the hood of her slicker scattering water droplets as one person passed. The man in science blue opened his mouth to say something, but upon catching Alex’s demeanor, he snapped it shut quickly, and significantly sped up.

Alex’s wet, black hair continued to drip excess amounts of water, down her head and face. Two of the rivulets slipped down the inside of her eyes. A left and a right later turn later, she was at her quarters inputting her code. This door opened slowly as if unsure if it really wanted to admit her in her current state. Her fist finally unclenched, allowing her duffel to fall to the floor inside the door. Next came her slicker, which hit the floor four feet further inside her quarters. This was followed by boots, pants, shirt, and anything else, as she kept moving through her quarters to the shower. 

She opted for water. When the first drops of icy water hit the top of her head, she lifted her face into the stream and braced herself, one hand on each side of the showerhead, one foot in front of the other. Only then, for the first time in nearly thirty hours did she dare let down her guard. A hot stream of vehemence fell from her eyes and mingled with the icy drops of rain, numbingly cold; yet it was the only thing she could feel. 

She stood in that attitude for as long as she could, until her lungs burned for air. Alex lowered and turned her head gasping in the chilling yet fresh air. But that single movement broke the tenacious control over her body for which she had fought for hours. Gulps of air and sobs intermingled.  

Four hours. Four hours between getting to hold her daughter in her arms and her arms closing around emptiness. Four hours between getting to confront her husband and mentally listening to his taunt - you’ll have to find me first - yet again.

That particular ship that Kona and Cassie boarded, had made a quick stop over at a nearby transport hub before taking off on a ten day long voyage across the quadrant. By the time she got there, they were already on another ship or on a long trip. Either way, they had vanished, like she had been clasping her fingers around a handful of sand. The tighter she grasped, the more sand fell through her fingers.

And here she stood in the icy shower with empty hands and heart