Lt. Cmdr Rebecca Iko -- You matter.
Rebecca Iko
((Edna's Chat n’ Chew, Terminal C, Amity Outpost))
Moore: Maybe: I don’t think my dissatisfaction is anything special. No different than anyone else, honestly… not a huge deal. This stuff happens, we go through rough patches, and life changes over time.
Bec nodded, but she didn’t buy it. It had been at least big enough of a deal for him to talk to Robin about it. Something was up.
Iko: That doesn’t mean it has to be that way. What’s goin’ on?
He sighed.
Moore: I don’t know, I just feel… stuck, like I am not going forward, or contributing anything meaningful. I feel like I am wasting my potential, and my time.
Now Bec sighed, and responded with a sympathetic
Iko: Mate…
The tone of which saying something along the lines of “Hey, no” and “I get it, but you’re wrong” and “I’m sorry you feel that way” and “why would you think that?!” all in one sweet, neatly packaged word.
Moore: I just don’t feel like I am going anywhere. There doesn’t seem to be any promotion opportunities, and when I requested to start taking advanced leadership courses—now nearly a year ago—I got turned down. Plus, there is all the recent stuff, with Charlena, and the Borg, and other things happening. I guess I am a little dissatisfied.
She nodded.
Iko: Starfleet hasn’t been what you signed up for.
She thought she’d been right, but he shook his head.
Moore: I never said that, nor do I believe it. It really isn’t a big deal. Honestly.
Bec folded her arms in front of her.
Iko: If it was a big enough deal for you to go over my head and head straight to Robin, I wanna help.
Kaito tilted his head to the side slightly. He seemed confused. Bec tried to suggest ways he could get out of “being stuck”.
Iko: There’s no reason why you can’t ask to do those leadership courses again. A lot has changed in the past year.
He stared at her. She sighed, digging herself further into the hole she didn’t even realise she was making.
Iko: Do you want me to give it to you straight?
Moore: ::Slightly confused:: What?
Bec interlocked her hands and rested them on the table. She asked a question that was almost always reserved for someone questioning their superior. Rank was funny, like that. Sometimes she even forgot his second pip was hollow, and that he hadn’t, yet, been promoted.
But, though she herself had never actively strived for promotion, it had just sort of been thrust upon her, she'd picked up on what was needed in a good officer. And if Lieutenant Junior-Grade Moore felt stuck, a kick up the backside might help him out.
Iko: Permission to speak freely?
Moore: ::Speaking slowly processing:: Permission to speak freely? ::Looking right at Bec:: What? No? Why are you patronizing me like this?
Iko: I’m not. Kaito. I simply want to try and get you “unstuck”. And this is how I thought I could do that.
Moore: Permission to speak freely is between a subordinate and their commanding officer. It isn’t for an upper officer to an underling; it comes across as patronizing to me. But on top of that… we’re friends. When have we not spoken freely with each other? Unless there was some other subordinate in the office, we normally do… So I don’t know why it feels like you’re about to brush me aside, and there is this barrier now…
Now it was time for Bec to furrow her brow and quite likely give Kaito the same expression as he had given her moments earlier.
While she was quiet, her mind was travelling at a million miles an hour. She didn’t know what she’d done, or what had happened, and was analysing everything she’d said and done in the last twenty minutes or so trying to figure it out.
Moore: Look, to be very clear. I did not go over your head to Commander Hopper, I didn’t skip you to go tell her about my frustrations. I went to her to do my job, provide my post-operation report, the same report you got before her, and at the end I slipped up. It came out. I let my frustration out, and Robin, not Commander Hopper, but Robin, who is also my friend, wasn’t going to let me get out of there without talking… It was friend to friend, and honestly I didn’t want to talk about it.
Iko: I thought…
She wasn’t sure what she’d thought.
Moore: I don’t think it’s a big deal. I’ve just dealt with a lot of trauma this past year and a half. Hell, my girlfriend is laying in a bed with her leg blown off… That’s a big deal… not my personal feelings or dissatisfaction because it feels like I am running into a brick wall. I’m going to live longer than most on this station, so eventually the brick wall will break. As far as I’m concerned, how I feel doesn’t matter right now. Not compared to everything else.
He sighed. But even if the mindset and tone and patronising-ness Bec was using wasn’t helpful or what she wanted, she decided she still needed to be adamant about one thing.
Iko: But it does.
Moore: Response
She put her hands firmly on the table.
Iko: Kaito, it does because you’re my friend.
Moore: Response
Iko: Have I made you feel like it doesn’t—because honestly I think this whole conversation has been me trying too hard to be a leader and a department chief because hi I’m suddenly second officer and I don’t know if I know what I’m doing…
She pretty much facepalmed. But one of those facepalms where you sort of cup your hand around your temple and don’t actually cover any of your face.
Moore: Response
Iko: I think what I’ve been trying to say is: Maybe you’ll bust through your brick wall. But until that happens, I want to help.
She furrowed her brow and silently glanced away for a moment, what felt like a rather long moment, before asking:
Iko: Do you want help?
Moore: Response
Tag/TBC