Clean jokes…
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Gary Phelps
Jan 23, 2025, 8:21:03 PM1/23/25
to Sailors Clean Humor
Clean jokes…
The more I get to know people...
The more I realize why Noah let only animals on the boat.
——
A frantic woman takes her kid to the doctor. "Doctor, doctor," she says. "My son swallowed a pen!"
The doctor says, “Calm down madam. I’ll take care of it. But let me get some information first." He takes a clipboard with a form and asks her, “Name?”
The woman replies, “Parker”
After a movement of thought the doctor says, “The name of the BOY, Madam, not the pen brand.”
——
I ordered a new sail for my boat, but realized I’d made a mistake. When I called to change the order, the person that answered said, “Sorry, that sail has shipped”.
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Double negatives are a no-no in English.
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I used to work with a guy called Tailor who hated his name. I told him, “I think it suits you”.
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How does a hamburger introduce his girlfriend? Meat Patty.
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I heard about this lady that was shopping with her husband. He had asked her to not buy any new clothes.
Well she saw this dress in the window and decided to try it on. She liked it so much, she bought it in secret. Couple of days later the husband discovered it and he was so upset. And she explained to him that when she tried it on it looked so good that Satan tempted her to buy it and she just couldn't resist it.
He said, "Well, why didn't you do what the scripture says and say "get behind me Satan?" She said, "I did and he told me it looked even better from a distance."
——
—
To subscribe to Sailors Clean Humor send blank email to sailors-clean-...@googlegroups.com
—
The more I get to know people...
The more I realize why Noah let only animals on the boat.
——
A frantic woman takes her kid to the doctor. "Doctor, doctor," she says. "My son swallowed a pen!"
The doctor says, “Calm down madam. I’ll take care of it. But let me get some information first." He takes a clipboard with a form and asks her, “Name?”
The woman replies, “Parker”
After a movement of thought the doctor says, “The name of the BOY, Madam, not the pen brand.”
——
I ordered a new sail for my boat, but realized I’d made a mistake. When I called to change the order, the person that answered said, “Sorry, that sail has shipped”.
——
Double negatives are a no-no in English.
——
I used to work with a guy called Tailor who hated his name. I told him, “I think it suits you”.
——
How does a hamburger introduce his girlfriend? Meat Patty.
——
I heard about this lady that was shopping with her husband. He had asked her to not buy any new clothes.
Well she saw this dress in the window and decided to try it on. She liked it so much, she bought it in secret. Couple of days later the husband discovered it and he was so upset. And she explained to him that when she tried it on it looked so good that Satan tempted her to buy it and she just couldn't resist it.
He said, "Well, why didn't you do what the scripture says and say "get behind me Satan?" She said, "I did and he told me it looked even better from a distance."
——
—
To subscribe to Sailors Clean Humor send blank email to sailors-clean-...@googlegroups.com
—
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