Summer
is here at Walmart!!!!!
Well, it is summer now, which means that we all
get to witness more gems like this one.
Why do I have a feeling Jim Henson is
behind her......working her
arms?
Ummm, I think you might need something more
than the pine tree air-freshener. It’s a start......not where I
would have started.......but it’s a
start.
C'mon now, on a scale of 1 to 10,
where do you think his level of 'giving a f***'
is? I am seriously jealous of this
dude.
The only thing this guy is missing is a
bedazzled jean jacket to match his purdy pink sparkly bedazzled
belt.
Hey Hulk Hogan, guys with a full head of hair
look stupid with a ponytail. Wanna take a guess how good it looks
without half your hair?
Hookers love cupcakes. I have nothing
else to add to that. Can’t argue with the
facts.
I don’t really know why Magic School Bus Lady
is always at Walmart, because I don’t think they have any of the clothes
she wears, nor do I know where you can find any of the things she
wears.
Why do I feel like at any minute now, a
big arm-bar is going to swing out with a STOP sign on
it?
Sasselfratz, hibidibut, yzidili, guvukafet….
Oh, don’t mind me. I’m just trying to think of new words to
describe this lady
because I can’t seem to find any that already
exist.
Listen hunny, the
“ONE-SIZE-FITS-ALL” tag is lying to you, so I suggest
we try things on before we buy.
Your first move should be checking that
backpack for a pair of underwear. If there are none in there,
well, you ARE at a store that sells underwear. Problem
solved. I would move on to pants.......but...... I don’t want to
get too far ahead.........and lose
you.
OOOOWWW, she’s a
BRICK (da-na-na-na) HOUSE.
She’s
MIGHTY- MIGHTY, just LETTIN’
it ALL
hang-out.
Just 'cuz you have the
'all-natural' sleeves thing goin' on, doesn’t mean the rest
of us are cool with you wearing your tank
top.
I wonder if she can 'tie ‘em in a knot or
tie ‘em in a bow'......because unfortunately, I already know
they 'wobble to an fro’.
I cannot confirm if this is indeed THE Little
Miss Muffet. Mainly because I have no idea what a tuffet looks
like.
How does one manage to make it look like
they've tucked their ass into their pants like a
shirt?
Oh, the humanity. How did we get to this
point as a species???
At what point does a person just say “F*ck
it, I don’t need to put on shoes or pants”? Most people in the
world would put pants on to walk into another room of the house, or if
not that, then they would put some on if they're going to the street to
get their mail. And you made it to
Walmart.
I know what a muffin-top is, but I’ve never
seen a muffin-back. I think there needs to be a better word for
it, so, I'm open to
suggestions.
OH COME ON! Are you actually going
to stand there and tell me you don't even feel a
breeze?
'
Hey! They don’t make
'tube-bottoms' for a
reason.
"I’m sorry sir, but those Christmas hams put
you over the 12 item limit for this
line.
ATTENTION WALMART
SHOPPERS: "Warm weather is now here as we start the
summer, and so is
the unfortunate “Swamp Ass”
epidemic. Be aware-- and try to stay dry. She pisses her
pants but she can't leave wally
world.
The irony here is overwhelming. I’m just
going to sit back and let you soak it
in.
OH DAMN, Santa is WORKIN’
it.
HEY! HEY! ---HOLD STILL!!! There’s
a f***in’ jellyfish on your head! HOLD STILL SO
I CAN GET IT OFF!!!
Damn. Now THOSE are some
titties.
Before he died, did Elvis get a poodle
pregnant? I don’t know, I’m not here to judge....….Okay, I
am........but still......
How the hell did the White Witch of Narnia come
through the wardrobe?
Yes!!!!! Blue is definitely your
color!
I was not aware that
barbers were still using the salad bowl as a styling instrument.
WOW! That’s so cool! JanSport came
out with a new flesh colored fanny-pack….wait….hold on….can it be….is
it…..OH MY DEAR GOD!
I would like to officially nominate those pants
for worst color option EVER! Are you serious with that?
“Hey, let’s get skin-tight pants, make them in sizes where the
words ’skin-tight’ should be off-limits, and then produce
them in a flesh color.” What a great idea!
Ya really think ya gonna be needing those
condoms there, big fella?
