Every few years you hear a story of a country bumpkin with no education and a low-wage job who managed to save and compound tens of millions of dollars. The story is always the same: They just quietly saved and invested for decades. They never bragged, never flaunted, never compared themselves to others or worried that they trailed their benchmark last quarter.
Susan Cain finds what is undervalued, quiet, and precious. In Bittersweet she takes you to a room in your own heart full of treasures that you had forgotten about. This is a book to read, feel, and savor
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Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking is a 2012 nonfiction book written by American author and speaker Susan Cain. Cain argues that modern Western culture misunderstands and undervalues the traits and capabilities of introverted people, leading to "a colossal waste of talent, energy, and happiness."[1]
The book presents a history of how Western culture transformed from a culture of character to a culture of personality in which an "extrovert ideal" dominates and introversion is viewed as inferior or even pathological. Adopting scientific definitions of introversion and extroversion as preferences for different levels of stimulation, Quiet outlines the advantages and disadvantages of each temperament, emphasizing the myth of the extrovert ideal that has dominated in the West since the early twentieth century. Asserting that temperament is a core element of human identity, Cain cites research in biology, psychology, neuroscience and evolution to demonstrate that introversion is both common and normal, noting that many of humankind's most creative individuals and distinguished leaders were introverts. Cain urges changes at the workplace, in schools, and in parenting; offers advice to introverts for functioning in an extrovert-dominated culture; and offers advice in communication, work, and relationships between people of differing temperament.
Cain graduated from Princeton University[2] and Harvard Law School[3] and became a lawyer and negotiations consultant.[4] Her interest in writing on the subject of introversion reportedly stemmed from her own difficulties with public speaking, which made Harvard Law School "a trial".[5] She likened her tenure as a Wall Street lawyer to time spent in a foreign country.[6] Cain left her careers in corporate law and consulting, for a quieter life of writing at home with her family.[5]
Cain argues that modern Western culture misunderstands and undervalues the traits and capabilities of introverted people, employing academic research, supplemented with anecdotes, to describe how American culture got to this point.[6]
Cain says Western, and in particular, American, culture is dominated by what she calls the "Extrovert Ideal", described as "the omnipresent belief that the ideal self is gregarious, alpha and comfortable in the spotlight".[6] Western societies, being based on the Greco-Roman ideal which praises oratory,[9] favor the man of action over the man of contemplation,[10] and view introversion as being between a disappointment and pathology.[11] In contrast, traditional, pre-Americanized Asian culture is more inclined to value reticence and caution.[6][12] The Harvard Independent's Faith Zhang remarked that Quiet seems in part a gentle rebuke to a culture that values style over substance.[13]
Cain asserts that whether one is outwardly oriented to the surrounding world, or inwardly oriented to the inner riches of the mind, has as profound an effect as one's gender.[15][25] Cain asserted that our lives are shaped as profoundly by personality as by gender or race, that the single most important aspect of personality is where we fall on the introvert-extrovert spectrum, and that one's place on this continuum "influences our choice of friends and mates, how we make conversation, resolve differences, and show love. It affects the careers we choose and whether or not we succeed at them."[26]
Our lives are shaped as profoundly by personality as by gender or race. And the single most important aspect of personality ... is where we fall on the introvert-extrovert spectrum. Our place on this continuum influences our choice of friends and mates, how we make conversation, resolve differences, and show love. It affects the careers we choose and whether or not we succeed at them.
Cain maintains that there are introverts and extroverts in almost every species of the animal kingdom, each having a corresponding survival strategy.[22] She says that research indicates our own degree of introversion or extroversion is detectable in infants and likely to be innate,[12] and about 50% heritable (half by nature, half by nurture).[28] Babies who are more highly reactive (more sensitive) to stimulation are more likely to develop into introverts, while less reactive (less sensitive) babies generally become extroverts who actually draw on the energy around them.[12] Introverts appear to be less responsive than extroverts to dopamine (a brain chemical linked to reward-driven learning), and have a more circumspect and cautious approach to risk than do extroverts.[3] Introverts are more governed by the neocortex, the part of the brain responsible for thinking, planning, language and decision making.[12]
Cain has noted that people of different temperament who become involved in personal relationships can encounter misunderstanding and conflict.[15] After a day's work an introvert may need to quietly recharge, while the extrovert may find the introvert's withdrawal hurtful; conversely, the extrovert may want to jointly socialize with others, which the introvert may find exhausting.[15] Cain advises, first, a mutual understanding of where the other party is coming from; and second, balancing their respective needs for socializing and for solitude in a practical compromise in how the couple connects and how the couple jointly socializes with others.[15]
Cain describes how introversion in children is not a defect but instead may involve a careful, sensitive temperament that may bring stronger academics, enhanced creativity and a unique brand of leadership and empathy. Cain says that introverts win a disproportionate number of Phi Beta Kappa keys and National Merit Scholarship finalist positions, cheat and break rules less, are more likely to be described by parents and caregivers as empathetic or conscientious, and are less likely to get into car accidents, participate in extreme sports and place large financial bets.[30] Cain advises that students need more privacy and autonomy, and should be taught to work together but also how to work alone.[10] Judith Warner, an author of parenting books, approved of Cain's advice that parents should view introverted children's social style with understanding rather than fear.[5]
Cain is not seeking introvert domination but a better balance and inclusion of different work styles, acknowledging that big ideas and great leadership can come from either personality type.[11] Cain cites studies showing that introverts are better at leading proactive employees because they listen to and let them run with their ideas, while extroverts are better at leading passive employees because they have a knack for motivation and inspiration.[11] Cain has emphasized that the key to maximizing talents is to put yourself into the zone of stimulation that is right for you.[10] The Harvard Independent's Faith Zhang closed her review of Quiet with the observation that Cain's point is not that introverts are inherently superior or that we should all shroud ourselves in solitude, but that diversity provides balance and makes for a fuller, richer world.[13]
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