THE MORE THINGS CHANGE-THE MORE THEY REMAIN THE SAME-By Tom

[tom]

A year ago,I declared my Independence and moved into my own
apartment.At 18,I was still a kid at heart and lived it up quite a
bit.My refrigerator only had some cold pizza and two cans of beer in
it and my pantry shelves were empty and collecting dust.I woke up
feeling miserable.I phoned my mother and started whining into the
receiver about how bad I felt.Mom listened and paused."Alright
Brenda,just stay in bed and I will be right over." She said evenly.I
hung up the phone and pulled the covers up to my neck and drifted off
to sleep.

I woke up to find my mother standing next to my bed.She stroked my
cheek."You feel feverish,honey,did you take your temperature.? she
asked."I rubbed my eyes."No,the battery in my digital is dead." I
replied.My mother shook her head disapprovingly."Those things aren't
reliable." she lectured.Mom sat down next to me."I went to the store
and bought you some cans of soup and some crackers.You have nothing to
eat around here,just as I suspected." she sighed."Thanks Mom," I said
weakly."You're welcome." Mom said and reached into her purse.

I watched as she took out a white thermometer case."Alright
Brenda,turn over for me-I want to take your temperature." I was jolted
awake by now."Oh Mom,that's your "Fanny thermometer" I whined.Mom
unscrewed the top and slowly pulled the glass mercury thermometer
out."I'm too old for that,I'm 18 for crying out loud." I cried."You
haven't acted very grown up young lady,crying over the phone to
me.Then I come over and find stale pizza in your refrigerator and no
food in the pantry.You need to grow up and act like an adult." Mom
lectured.

"I'm sorry-but you don't have to take my temperature "that way" do
you? I complained.Mom slowly shook down the thermometer and held it up
to the light."Yes I have to take it "that way",now roll over and get
your panties down." she informed me.I sat up and watched as she opened
the jar of petroleum jelly that I kept on my night stand.Mom carefully
greased the bulb of her rectal thermometer.She glanced over at me ,and
seeing that I was not on my stomach with a bare bottom for her,said."I
can't do this the easy way ,or the hard way,it's up to you." she
threatened.

I blushed and rolled over.I pulled down my flannel pajama bottoms and
white panties.The cool air hit my warm bottom.I knew Mom never made an
idle threat and was going to turn my over and expose my bottom herself
it I did not comply.She always used the rectal method to take
temperatures on my sisters and I from the time I could remember to the
time I moved out last month.

As I lay on my stomach,awaiting the insertion,my childhood rectal
temperatures came back to me.I recalled seeing my sisters with the
"glass rod" between their cheeks whenever mom suspected an illness was
at hand,or just to confirm that a whining child was "well enough" to
go to school on a many a Monday morning.I tried "faking sick" once or
twice,but it never worked out like I planned.I was soon "bottoms up"
with a well lubricated thermometer up my tingling rectum for a very
long three minutes.

Long after my girlfriends were "switched" to the oral thermometer, mom
continued taking rectal temperatures on me.I was great full that non
of them ever found out.I was jolted back to the present when I felt
Mom's fingers part my buttocks and expose my anus.I groaned and buried
my head into my pillow."Stop fussing,it's not like you haven't had
this done hundreds of times before" Mom reminded me.She eyed my
puckered anus and slowly slid the lubricated rectal thermometer into
me.I shivered as the glass felt very cold due to my fever.The bulb
tickled as it entered my rectum.Mom rested her hand on my buttocks and
checked her watch.

As I waited mom mentioned"I am going to leave this thermometer with
you.It doesn't need batteries and is so much more accurate." "Gee
thanks Mom" I said sarcastically.Mom did not reply.Soon I felt her
grasp the stem and withdraw the thermometer from my tingling
bottom."101.4" she announced and placed two Tylenol on a tissue for me
on the night stand and got me a glass of water.I popped them in my
mouth and drained the glass.

I watched mom wipe the rectal thermometer with an alcohol soaked
tissue and replace it into it's case.She placed it next to the jar of
petroleum jelly.Mom leaned over and kissed me on the cheek and told me
to make myself some soup after I took a nap.She told me to take my
temperature and call her later that night with the results."I have to
get home and start the supper for your father." she advised before
tucking me in bed and telling me to "Get some rest."Mom walked down
the hall and out the door.I turned over and eyed the thermometer on my
night stand."The more things change,the more they remain the same." I
thought to myself.

THE END.