does John Heald (CD of Destiny) really improvise?
Dan Gonzales
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I thought that John's "Ultimate Audience Participation Event" was by far the
funniest thing I had EVER seen! Following that show rumors circulated about
some of it being "fixed." During the show, a large woman "accidently"
tackled John to the floor of the stage, one man who had stripped in front of
the Palladium earlier was a villain, and to top that all off, the "hero" of
the story was an Asian man who spoke no English, which John "realized" only
after he was up on stage.
My family and I find that this "comedy of errors" could never happen on
its own. On top of that show, John also picked a man from New York (who was
seated in the front row of the Palladium and got up to go to the bathroom
during one of John's shows) who's wife would be "dripping in jewlry" if he
danced to the Mexican Hat Dance every time John said the words "New York."
That included PA announcements and during shows. After dancing, the guy
from NY had to say to his wife that "it has been a wonderful 28 years, and
that tongiht is yabba dabba do night!"
The first night of the cruise while interviewing passengers on stage,
(one of his favorite things to do) John came across a passenger named (I am
not making this up) Dick Little. As you might imagine, John loved to say hi
to Mr. Little in every one of his PA announcements.
True, John was the best cruise director that I have ever seen on my 3
Carnival cruises, but I wonder if he plans it to be that way. Would anyone
who has seen John's amazing antics please email me if there are any
similarites to what I've described here. By the way, my sailing date was
July 5.
-Dan
gonz...@west.net
paco25...@hotmail.com
Bill Dove
John is definitely number one! He had a 350 pound or so woman on our cruise
on stage with him every night. Her name was Dottie, and during the last
night of the cruise, he dedicated the curise as the "Dottie Cruise" and gave
her and her husband a free 7 day cruise. At that time, he was doing "The
bed time story" skit with Dottie and other members of the audience on night
7. During the performance, Dottie jumped on top of him and nearly flattened
him to the size of a pankake. Sure, there are similarities, including his
selecting a man in this same skit who could speak only a few words of
English, but John knows who to select from the people available to get the
best responses from his audiences. This guy is tops!
Happy Cruisin',
Bill Dove
Adorable You Custom Caps
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
<snip>
>I thought that John's "Ultimate Audience Participation Event" was by far
the
>funniest thing I had EVER seen! Following that show rumors circulated
about
>some of it being "fixed." During the show, a large woman "accidently"
>tackled John to the floor of the stage, one man who had stripped in front
of
>the Palladium earlier was a villain, and to top that all off, the "hero" of
>the story was an Asian man who spoke no English, which John "realized" only
>after he was up on stage.
<snip>
>
>-Dan
>gonz...@west.net
>paco25...@hotmail.com
>
>
>
THorne2805
participants, etc. on each sailing but so do the other Carnival Cruise
Directors. As a matter of fact our "Dick Little" was at my home this past
weekend (had a post-cruise get together) and he explained the set up to us. As
funny as the skits and jokes are they do tend to get tiresome cruise after
cruise. I would think Carnival would freshen up their act.
Linda B. Dunlap
Since you already "spilled the beans," on our two cruises with Mr. Heald, the
guy's name was Dick Golden.
Dan Gonzales
I'm sorry if I spilled the beans, but I put nothing unusual in the title of
my thread, and I had that large notice at the top of my original post. Even
though John may have planned all this out, he was still the best cruise
director I have ever had, and his "Bedtime story" was the funniest thing I
had ever seen.
-Dan
Liv2cruise
Sad to say, but this very same topic came up on the AOL Cruise Critic board.
After about fifteen to twenty people responded with *almost* the exact same
answers, it can only be assumed that the acts are staged.
I've been on the Destiny twice. It seems to be more than coincidence that John
got flattened twice by Mary of the Bedtime Story. There's either a Dick
Little, Dick Golden or Dick Wooden on *every* cruise. Sometimes it's New York,
sometimes New Hampshire, sometimes New Jersey...but it's *always*
yabba-dabba-do night.
Yes, it works for first time cruisers...maybe even second timers. But by the
eighth time, it's getting stale. Some of the posters on the AOL board
responded that we couldn't expect Carnival to change their act every week, to
which I responded, that indeed was true...how about every two or three
years...or maybe once in my lifetime!
Also, it seems extremely popular to have a young man propose to his girlfriend
during the talent show. Now this could happen...there are enough young people
on the cruise that at least one of them could be planning on doing the
proposing. But the format is always the same.
To paraphrase a popular TV show, "Everybody Loves John (Heald)". Sorry, but
I'm not a member of this fan club. I've been on enough Carnival cruises to
know a good CD when I see one and really good ones are extremely rare. I'm
hoping that we'll come across somebody new on our Paradise cruise next year.
My favorite cruise director of all-time is Rand Woodbury (Celebration-1990) who
is now a featured magician on Carnival cruises. He was original, funny and
very off-beat. A lot of people don't like his magic act because of his
personality. To each his own.
Okay, that's my 2 cents for tonight.
Arline in Florida<------watching Earl in the Gulf, especially for rtc'ers
cruising on the Celebration this coming weekend (have you seen the weather,
George, Becca???)
Liv2c...@aol.com
George Leppla
>Arline in Florida<------watching Earl in the Gulf, especially for rtc'ers
>cruising on the Celebration this coming weekend (have you seen the weather,
>George, Becca???)
Weather? Are we going to have weather?
Not on any itinerary I booked. Why, if the weather was less than perfect I
would be forced to sue myself!
George in PA <--- keeping his fingers crossed
George Leppla, MCC
http://www.cruisemaster.com
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Gayle A Kortright
I remember the bit well BUT it wasn't John Heald. Our cruise director
on that voyage was Devin Fleming!!
On Tue, 1 Sep 1998, Stephen Sykes wrote:
> Was on the Destiny, 12-06-97. John Heald, did the same bit, with the
same names...prob. the Same people.....
> none-the-less it was STILL funny (unless you have seen Johns' "act"
> TWO times,,as I have.)
Dan Gonzales
Competition." Too bad only 2 guys signed up. In addition to that, John had
his own redition of "The Full Montey" when he had 3 guys put on funny
underwear, cummberbunds, and bow ties, that's all, and dance for their wives
in front of the Palladium. When John asked one older gentlman what his
occupation was, he calmly replied, "A Babtist minister." Needless to say,
the audience didn't settle down for a while. That guy, who was actually
Jewish, sat near us in the dining room and was quite a star.
-Dan
>Back in the early 90's, Carnival cruises included a "Male Nightgown
>Contest" night. It was the absolute funniest part of the cruise and
>John was a fantastic emcee and made that night the best of all!!!!
>
>Anyone else out there remember the Male Nightgown Contests????????
N. Jill Velencia
L Imagination in July. I think it was on the newly wed not so newly wed
game. They picked 3 couples and had the three husbands come out in
underware and dance in front ot their wives and the audience. The couple
that was supposedly celebrating their 40th anniversay, what a surprise
he said he was a Baptist minister. All of his "kids " and grandkids were
in the talent show. I doubt that there is a Baptist minister on every
cruise. The heavy set lady is employed by the cruise line as well as the
man they call Dick Little or a variation of.. On the same show they
picked a couple and told the man everytime they said South Carolina,
supposedly his home state, he had to run to the stage and flap his arms
3 times and bend down one one knee and face his wife and tell her he
loved her and they would win jewelry. These are all part of the big hoax
and are kind of funny the first time but they get old after 2 or 3
cruises.
Jill - Seattle
Cath...@worldnet.att.net
I sailed with him last. I sailed with John in '91 (first cruise) and
again in '92. Yes some things were the same on both cruises, but I
still loved him. After 8 cruises on 4 different lines, he's still the
BEST.
Back in the early 90's, Carnival cruises included a "Male Nightgown
Contest" night. It was the absolute funniest part of the cruise and
John was a fantastic emcee and made that night the best of all!!!!
Anyone else out there remember the Male Nightgown Contests????????
Cathy <-----225 days and counting
an Gonzales wrote:
>
> DON'T READ THIS IF YOU HAVEN'T BEEN ON THE DESTINY YET. But if you have,
> then please enjoy.
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> I thought that John's "Ultimate Audience Participation Event" was by far the
> funniest thing I had EVER seen! Following that show rumors circulated about
> some of it being "fixed." During the show, a large woman "accidently"
> tackled John to the floor of the stage, one man who had stripped in front of
> the Palladium earlier was a villain, and to top that all off, the "hero" of
> the story was an Asian man who spoke no English, which John "realized" only
> after he was up on stage.
Gayle A Kortright
I was on the Destiny in December and CD Devin Fleming (I think John was on
vacation that week) "presented" the Male Nightgown Contest. It had to be the
funniest thing I've seen on a cruise ship - outside of "If I Were Not Upon
the Sea". So, I guess, Carnival is still doing the Nightie contest!
Gayle
On 4 Sep 1998
Amzey
>July 5.
Mine was the week before yours and the exact same thing happened at that
show...
Amy
Lisa Gutierrez
: Yeah, on my cruise July 5th, there was a HILARIOUS "Male Nightgown
: Competition." Too bad only 2 guys signed up. In addition to that, John had
: his own redition of "The Full Montey" when he had 3 guys put on funny
: underwear, cummberbunds, and bow ties, that's all, and dance for their wives
: in front of the Palladium. When John asked one older gentlman what his
: occupation was, he calmly replied, "A Babtist minister." Needless to say,
: the audience didn't settle down for a while. That guy, who was actually
: Jewish, sat near us in the dining room and was quite a star.
: -Dan
: >Back in the early 90's, Carnival cruises included a "Male Nightgown
: >Contest" night. It was the absolute funniest part of the cruise and
: >John was a fantastic emcee and made that night the best of all!!!!
: >
: >Anyone else out there remember the Male Nightgown Contests????????
Yes! John Heald hosted the contest on the Aug 9th sailing western caribbean
on the Destiny, and it was a riot! I loved John! He was so
funny! 9 guys
entered the contest and I think one of the guys was gay
so he stole the show! everyone laughed like crazy!
Lisa
so
--
Lisa Gutierrez
a057...@bcfreenet.seflin.lib.fl.us
Cath...@worldnet.att.net
the contest. The winner was a Massachusetts cop (vice squad???). It
was a riot. I made sure I bought that tape!!!!!
Cathy