(fantasy) JC books a dream PPV
JCGilbrt
Okay, gang, it's way past time I decided to get into the dream match booking
business. Let's set the scenario. WCW, ECW, & WWF converge on the world's most
famous arena, MSG, for Dream Clash 1. Your announcers are Jim Ross, Joey
Styles, and rotating in the 3d chair, Bobby Heenan, Jim Cornette, and Terry
Taylor.
Match 1: WWF European Champ (for the 2nd time) Owen Hart defends against "Too
Sexy" Brian Christopher. Brian comes out to that famous one-hit wonder by Right
Said Fred. Owen is back to being the Rocket, and enters to some old Def Leppard
music. Lots of hot moves back & forth. Ross, Styles, & Cornette are able to
call ALL the moves! Climax is when Christopher misses the Tennessee Jam and
Owen converts it to the Sharpshooter.
Match 2: "Break it down!!!" DX makes its first appearance of the night as
Hunter Helmsley comes out for the first interfederational match of the night.
Strangely, Chyna is not at ringside, and Ross explains that Chyna is in New
Zealand on a movie set (take a guess what that's about!). Then, the disco ball
and strobe lights are out as Disco Inferno makes his way out. Everyone thinks
H3 will walk through this one, but noooooooo! DI scores the upset after 6:55
with his new Last Dance (spinebuster).
Match 3: Raven, upset that he isn't in the main event, issues an open
challenge. Goldberg comes out to answer the challenge, and virtually forces
Raven to swallow his pride and actually take a chance. Raven hits the Evenflow
DDT, but Goldberg pops right up. Spear-jackhammer-pin. 'Nuff said. Total time:
3:45.
Match 4: ECW is finally heard from, as Rob Van Dam challenges WCW Cruiser champ
Chris Jericho. Fans don't know who to root for. Styles & Taylor at the mics.
Taylor does his famous Dusty Rhodes and Randy Savage impressions during the
match. Joey says "Oh, my God!" about five times. Match ends at 14:44 when
Jericho blocks the VanDaminator with a missle dropkick that knocks Robbie Boy
to Nod. Fettucini Alfonso blows his whistle in protest after, but CJ bops him
around and slaps on the Liontamer. No Sabu.
Match 5: Taz comes out for a match against Curt Hennig. Rick Rude talks smack,
and Taz suplexes him halfway to New Jersey. Hennig attacks, but it's too late.
Taz is zoned in, and eventually Mr. Imperfect taps out.
Match 6: Ken Shamrock takes on another member of the NWO, Scott Steiner. Heenan
took over the comedy chair in the last match. He nearly has heart failure
seeing Shamrock dominate. Steiner tries a huracarana, but Shamrock blocks and
hits the anklelock before Fluffy Bagwell comes in for the DQ. Shamrock cleans
house himself and tosses Bagwell about 15 rows.
Match 7: Hulk Hogan's retirement match, but it isn't the main event (look who
gets that gig!). Hogan risks his career in a grudge match against Kevin Nash,
who gets a huge face pop in his return to NYC, although the roles are supposed
to be reversed. Match ends unexpectedly when Nash surprises Hogan with a small
package at 7:30. Bischoff attacks Nash, who merely powerbombs Eric all the way
down to China (don't we wish).
Match 8: "Self Hi-Five!!" DDP is in da house, US belt in hand, Kimberly by his
side, for a match against Rocky Maivia and Shane Douglas in a real 3-way dance.
Rocky is bounced first at 4:44 after a Douglas belly-to-belly suplex. Kim &
Francine get into a catfight, but Kim gets the better of this deal and gives
Francine a real dose of sweet chin music. DDP and Douglas have it out in an
even match for 15:00 before DDP "Bang!"s Douglas for the win.
Match 9: Asbury Park's Bam Bam Bigelow against the Giant. Can 3B get the Asbury
Park Driver (Michinoku Driver) on the Giant? Hmmmm, well, of course not!! TT
does his best Casey Kasem as Shaggy from "Scooby-Doo" ("Zoinks!") during the
match. Giant does what RSPW has been waiting for, a Giantsault, but misses,
then 3B shows him how to do it right, and pins the stunned big man.
Match 10: The second three-way dance has HBK in the co-main event against Sabu
and Bret Hart. Bret's old WWF music plays, and the house explodes with the
biggest face pop of the night. They go at it for 20:00 before Sabu is
eliminated by Michaels & Hart, after HBK tries the superkick on Bret, who's
being held by Sabu, but Bret ducks. Stunned, Shawn tries to go after Bret full
bore, but Bret is one step ahead. Shawn taps out at 40:40.
Match 11: the battle of phenoms sees Sting defending the WCW title against the
Undertaker. The funeral bells toll first, bringing out the 'Taker. Sting then
follows, but he's back in the neon colors. The fans go nuts. Styles has an
orgasm. The bout goes 10:30 before Sting pins the 'Taker with a Scorpion Death
Drop. Kane then enters, as do members of the NWO. Bagwell makes the mistake of
making the first move, but it is Kane that knocks him back to the Lincoln
Tunnel. Sting, stunned at first, gets his licks in on the NWO, and then the
Undertaker recovers to join the attack. The Brothers from the Dark Side & Sting
clear the ring. Kane moves as if to attack Sting, but Undertaker stops him. "He
is not your enemy." 'Taker says. "The NWO and DX are the enemy!" The Brothers
bow, heads raised toward the heavens. A heavenly light shines on all three.
Show ends.
Weird, isn't it?
J. C. Gilbert
ConMan1040
>Okay, gang, it's way past time I decided to get into the dream match booking
>business. Let's set the scenario. WCW, ECW, & WWF converge on the world's
>most
>famous arena, MSG, for Dream Clash 1. Your announcers are Jim Ross, Joey
>Styles, and rotating in the 3d chair, Bobby Heenan, Jim Cornette, and Terry
>Taylor.
I'd say Ross, Mike Tenay and Joey Styles.
[snip]
>Match 3: Raven, upset that he isn't in the main event, issues an open
>challenge. Goldberg comes out to answer the challenge, and virtually forces
>Raven to swallow his pride and actually take a chance. Raven hits the
>Evenflow
>DDT, but Goldberg pops right up. Spear-jackhammer-pin. 'Nuff said. Total
>time:
>3:45.
That would be silly. It would kill Raven's character, which will be able to
hold more interest over a longer period of time than Goldberg will.
>Match 5: Taz comes out for a match against Curt Hennig. Rick Rude talks
>smack,
>and Taz suplexes him halfway to New Jersey. Hennig attacks, but it's too
>late.
>Taz is zoned in, and eventually Mr. Imperfect taps out.
More like, Hennig walks around the ring before he realizes he must look down to
find Taz. Taz, after trying some all time classic midgit wrestler movies, is
trapped in the Perfect Plex for a Hennig win. Taz goes bezerk after the match,
dragging the Haiti Kid in from the audience to slap on his finisher. Rey
Misterio breaks is up, telling the Haiti Kid that it was his fault for picking
on people smaller than him.
>
>Match 7: Hulk Hogan's retirement match,
This is my dream PPV match too.
>Match 8: "Self Hi-Five!!" DDP is in da house, US belt in hand, Kimberly by
>his
>side, for a match against Rocky Maivia and Shane Douglas in a real 3-way
>dance. [snip]
>even match for 15:00 before DDP "Bang!"s Douglas for the win.
Shane Douglas? The guy who just got pinned by Al "Lief Cassidy Jobber" Snow at
the last PPV beating Rocky Maivia and DDP? I think not.
>Match 10: The second three-way dance has HBK in the co-main event against
>Sabu
>and Bret Hart. Bret's old WWF music plays, and the house explodes with the
>biggest face pop of the night. They go at it for 20:00 before Sabu is
>eliminated by Michaels & Hart, after HBK tries the superkick on Bret, who's
>being held by Sabu, but Bret ducks. Stunned, Shawn tries to go after Bret
>full
>bore, but Bret is one step ahead. Shawn taps out at 40:40.
This would be an amazing match.
>
>Match 11: the battle of phenoms sees Sting defending the WCW title against
>the
>Undertaker
The battle of the no sells!
Interesting idea though.
***********
"But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount
up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk,
and not faint."
-- Isiah 40:31
JCGilbrt
>From: "Raven316"
>The main event will be JCGilbert against all his mothers customers in a
>"handicap" match. Winner gets his mother for the night.
>--
JACKASS!! Look, dude, I try to come up with something entertaining, developed
with a lot of thought and imagination, and morons like you have to make snide
remarks. Just because you're siding with the Idiots Three, doesn't mean you can
swear to their schoolyard lies.
J. C. Gilbert
Raven316
JCGilbrt <jcgi...@aol.com> wrote in article
<199803281854...@ladder01.news.aol.com>...
: JACKASS!! Look, dude, I try to come up with something entertaining,
developed
: with a lot of thought and imagination, and morons like you have to make
snide
: remarks. Just because you're siding with the Idiots Three, doesn't mean
you can
: swear to their schoolyard lies.
It wasn't me that wanted to start something. You are the one who started
shit about me. You should have learned by now that if you don't want to go
all the way, unlike your mother, don't start anything. As for Pete and his
friends, I have nothing against them. They leave me alone, I leave them
alone and we're all one big happy family. It takes just one red-headed,
momma's tit sucking bastard like you to start a fight. Now go back to your
room until mommy lets you come out and play again.
--
Raven 3:16 says:
I just chair shot your ass
Quote the Raven, nevermore
What about me
I respect you glenn-man