Wrestlemania IX predictions.
Jason Steeves
year's card more challenging to predict than other years', even if the
quality of the pairings isn't necessarily as good.
Ramon vs Backlund. While I don't think Backlund will ever get the WWF
title, he hasn't (to my knowledge) lost a match yet since his return.
Bob with one of his 101 fancy ways to pin a guy.
Kamala vs Bam Bam. Nothing exciting here. Bigelow will win. I wouldn't
be surprised to see Kamala get a splash in and not figure how to pin him.
By the time the fans have helped him, Bigelow kicks out. Bigelow with a
possible pin, possible win by countout (Kamala confuses easily).
Steiners vs Headshrinkers. I'm kinda looking forward to this one. I don't
understand why so many people are putting this one down. The Headshrinkers
have wrestled pretty intensely since their entry to the WWF. The Steiners
are a proven solid team. There's no way the Steiners will lose. Probable
Frankensteiner (seems to be the finisher of choice for big matches and it's
easier than boosting a 300lb man up on your shoulders).
Crush vs Doink. Here, I'm going by what I've heard announced so far as
post-Wrestlemania matches. Doink vs Crush has been going through the house
show circuit already and isn't going to continue after Wrestlemania. This,
being the finale for the feud, will be won by Crush. Since Vince still needs
"over" heels, I don't think Doink will get the pinapple crusher. Probably
a pin after a surprise power move.
Tenryu vs Lawler, if it happens, will be won by Tenryu. If Vince is getting
the guy (who used to be pretty big in Japan) to fly over, he's not going to
lose to a "commentator".
Perfect vs Luger. Perfect's too important a face to lose decisively. Luger's
too new to lose decisively. I can really see a double countout happening.
If it has to be a cheap win, I see Perfect getting it.
Undertaker vs El Gonzales. This feud is scheduled to continue into the spring,
so nothing decisive will happen here. This match has many possibilities
(unfortunately, good workrate isn't in there), but I would have to give the
edge to Undertaker.
Tatanka vs Michaels (IC title). How I hope Tatanka doesn't win the gold! How
I hope Michaels breaks the so-called "undefeated" streak. Well, Tatanka is
definately going to win the match, and probably win the title (ugh!).
Now for the MAIN EVENTS. The placement of the main events in the Wrestlemania
card is _SO_ important on calling the outcomes. Last year, the World title
match was pre-intermission and Hogan's match was last. I would expect that
this year too. Needless to say, the last match will be won by the face(s).
Megamaniacs vs Money Inc. No question the Megamaniacs will win the match. Will
they win the titles? Probably. Now what I'd like to see is a Jimmy Hart turn,
smashing the "armour piercing briefcase" of Money Inc's into Hogan repeatedly,
but that's not real likely. :-(
Hitman vs Yokozuna. THE hardest match on the card for me to call. I really
don't hold to the "Monday in Mississippi" theory, so I don't give Yoko the
edge for that reason. Something Bret said on the syndies this weekend
stuck with me. "Once the 10 minute mark has passed, you're all mine." I can
see Bret exhausting the big man. I can also see Yokozuna winning. So far
Bigelow's the only heel I've picked, but I give a SLIGHT edge to the Hitman.
Real rough one to call. It depends so much on what's going to happen the
next couple months. McMahon would be a fool (IMHO) to give Hogan the title,
because that would wreck all the work he's done in the last year to create
a credible face World Champ that isn't Hogan.
Anyway, that's the way I see things now. Should be interesting to see what
happens tomorrow. Should be interesting to see how a whole TV room full
of University students react to it! :-) We've ordered the PPV, paying $1
each. The price is okay anyway. :-)
______
(__ __) .----------------------.
_ / / | Jason Steeves |
( \/ / | (jste...@ac.dal.ca) |
\__/ ASON `----------------------'
John H. Johnson IV
Oops, Gee, I forgot Doink vs. Crush. Why bother? Doink will entertain is
Doinkomaniacs, but I think this one goes to the kiddies and Crush. WHo
knows? Maybe Doink will bring his evil twin brother, Shleppy the Dog Tamer,
and sick his wild dogs on teh Hawaiian fruit brudda. Shakka! NOT!
Winner- Crush
John Johnson
John H. Johnson IV
Backlund vs. Ramon:
Ramon enters the ring, and has been the recent
trend, will get a staggering ovation. (Why, might I ask? Did you hear the
fans on the Blizzard edition of Raw? They loved him!) Anyway, Backlund
will get his usual rousing three person cheer and pull the whole shake hands
deal. Expect Ramon to slap him across the face, and then pummel Backlund.
Backlund may get the upper hand, and start his "clinique" of wrestling
moves, which will excite his three person cheering section. Ramon will show
obvious frustration, and some point, start brawling like crazy. Finally,
Backlund wins with a pinfall, but Ramon gets the last laugh with the steel
chair, ruining Backlund's dream first Wrestlemania, maybe setting up for a
few future matches.
Steiners vs. Headshrinkers
Outstanding match. This will probably be a bump fest, with lots of very
interesting moves. Expect the Headshrinkers to miss a headbutt, and the
steiners to end it with Frankensteiner. WINNER: Steiners
Bam Bam vs. Kamala
This is one of those matches we can only hope something strange happens in
to divert our attention. The strange mention of Kamala being lost back to
his savage ways has me thinking. Bigelow will definately win, and who
knows, maybe the Savage Kamala returns from hiatus, with Slick ending up on
the short end of the deal. If I wasn't so sure that Hacksaw Duggan will be
runinng in to save Hart, I would bet that someone makes a run in on this
match.
Tatanka vs. Shawn Michaels
Well, you never know. Everyone, and every sign is that Tatanka will be the
next intercontinental champion. I guess we have no choice but to pick the
Lumbee Indian as new Champ. However, he won't hold the belt for longer
thant Ricky Steamboat. That is guaranteed!
Undertaker vs. Giant Gonzalez
Choke after choke after choke. Nothing will be settled here, and only on
pure speculation, Gonzalez by countout. Although, tombstoning
the Giant after the match would certainly make for one of those memorable
wrestlemania moments for next years promo clip...
amd give the fans something to cheer about.
Lugar vs. perfect
Bad day for my favorites. Perfect is great, and I think he shoudl win, but
I think he gets robbed, and maybe even knocked out with a foreign object, as
Lugar gets the victory. Perfect may smash the mirror of Lugar's head,
which would be entertaining, to sayt he least.
Yokozuna vs. Bret hart
The big one, I guess. Yokozuna has the bulk, the size, but certainly
nothing else going for him to make him a valuable champion. Every other
champion in recent memory has had some trait that made him worthwhile,
usually, the ability to talk was high on the list. Hart is the excellence
of execution, and deserves your "RESPECT" as all WWF fans could attest to, I
am sure. (Vince brainwashing mode, of course- no flames) Anyway, on the
matches merits alone, expect a run in by Hacksaw Jim Duggan to save the day,
knocking Yokozuna off the top rope as he sets up for teh Diaper drop, and
allowing Bret Hart to do a roling cradle for the upset victory. "He may very
well be the greatest World Wrestling Federation Champion of All Time!"-
Gorilla Monsoon
Megamaniacs vs. Money Inc.
The idea of the Hart heel turn would be sensational, coupled with a Brutus
traitor act, it could set up a very exciting fued. Of course, Brutus has
bene rather psychoti in recent months. If some famous WWFer from the past
is sitting at ringside by coincedence, ie. Ultimate Warrior, etc... expect
the heel turn by Brutus. However, this is doubtful, and the most likely
scenario is Hogan and Brutus cleanly pin one of the MOney Losers, and become
the new world wrestling federation champions.
Well, there you have it. Notice, this card allows for balance between Bad
Guys and Good Guys, and at the samet ime, the fans still can go home happy.
If the good guys win every amtch up to the WOrld Title defense, than let
there be no dobut that Yokozuna wins it all. I hope not.
Well, enjoy Wrestlemania, if so inclined. Otherwise, have fun picking on
the WWF, if you prefer. Let's hope this card gives us all some surprise to
talk about. After all, 6 had UW pin Hulk, 7 had the lovely Liz, 8 had
UWarrior, - let's just hope Hacksaw Duggan is the only thing interesting in
number 9!
JOhn Johnson