[UNWF] *Tuesday* Night Madness 3/4
Brak
(The camera fades back in to the sold out Fleet Center, where the fans sit
quietly and in shock)
MM: Welcome back UNWF fans, and, well, let me show you the tape.
(Mike pushes a button on a remote, and the screen clicks to previously
recorded footage)
(An ambulance has pulled up to ringside, where to paramedics are loading
Axel Aron onto a stretcher. They have immobilized his neck, and his legs and
arms are taped to the board. Aron is not moving, and his eyes are closed.
His breathing appears to be spastic, and as the medics load the body into
the van, the crowd sits in silence.)
(The camera cuts back to the Fleet Center)
MM: We haven’t yet received word on Axel Aron, but things appear to be very
serious.
SW: You always fear the neck injury, it is what has put most wrestlers out
of the sport.
MM: Our best wishes go out to Axel Aron.
SW: Moving along, it seems that a new arrival to the UNWF wants to-
(All of a sudden 'When Doves Cry' by Prince starts to play. Fireworks
explode at the entrance, and a black male appears in front of the curtain.
He has a full head of braids, and a small goatee around his mouth. He is
wearing a white, unbuttoned, see through silk shirt, black jeans and black
shoes. He also has a silver chain around his neck and a black leather belt
around his waist. He raises his arms and the fans receive him warmly with a
loud pop. He walks slowly to ringside shaking hands fans all the way. He
walks up the ringsteps and across the apron. He looks down at his chest,
sees his chain and hops from the apron. He takes the chain with the M logo
as the charm, and places it around the neck of a little boy at ringside. He
pats the kids head and then rolls underneath the bottom rope. He poses
inside the ring. As two fireworks go off behind him shooting up, and
simultaneously two going down, crossing, forming an M. He asks the ring
attendant for a mic, and she hands him one.)
Mercutio: Dos't thou not know thy name Mercutio? Well, then you soon shall.
You soon
Shall, my friends. I welcome you all to sit down and talk with the man known
as Mercutio. The one, sent by Caesar himself to do the bidding. And that
bidding is to win gold for Caesar. Starting with the UNWF Cruiserweight
Division. Now, I know thou art saying, how in holy hell do thee think thee
can accomplish this?
SW: Why the hell is this guy talking like that?
MM: Shhhh!
Mercutio: Simple. Pound thee opponents into dishonorable, vile submission. I
have had a dream tonight. I dreamt, that dreamers often lie. Such as those
who believe they can defeat Mercutio. Then, to talk about them in return, I
do not do. I start post-haste.
SW: What language is this guy-
Mercutio: El Nino. What is El Nino? Is it a name? A weather pattern trying
to cause mass destruction in beautiful Verona? Well, if it is, it must be
defeated. Correct, I am challenging thee El Nino. To a battle. Someone of
your house, namely you, must accept this challenge. For when one warrior
challenges another, only thou who are dishonorable decline.
MM: What an eloquent-
Mercutio: El Nino. When thou shalt accept to respond to the challenge laid
before thee, let me know. Until then I will be waiting with my trusty Dagger
ready to impale thou head. It seems to thee UNWF is lacking a Cruiserweight
Title. Well, I ask for the leader of UNWF to establish one, and give it to
Mercutio.
SW: Wasn’t this guy watching? He just said-
Mercutio: Thou shalt soon know the power of Verona. Be warned, all thee
within ears distance, Mercutio is placing a plague on the house of Nino. It
shall be removed inside the ring.
('When Doves Cry' Starts back up, and he throws the mic down. Goes through
the ropes, and jumps down from the apron. He walks down the aisle shaking
fans hands all the way and goes through the curtain.)
MM: What an entrance!
SW: What the hell!
MM: He comes in, challenges the number one ranked wrestler! This guy is
serious.
SW: I don’t know. He still talks funny.
MM: Yeah, you talk funny.
SW: I DO NOT!
MM: However you talk (laughs) you still talk too much.
SW: Shut up (Coughs).
MM: (Snickering) Well, two major events just went down in the last few
minutes, in case you just joined us. Axel Aron has been injured, the
severity of which is still unknown-
SW: You would make a good newscaster, do you know that?
MM: Stop, your voice is making me laugh. And we just witnessed the arrival
of Mercutio, who has already challenged El Nino in his bid to become the
first UNWF Cruiserweight Champion.
SW: Enough with the talking already. What is the next match?
MM: "Enough with the talking?" Talking is what we're paid to do!
SW: I just want to see a match-
MM: No, you just don't want to have to talk because you are afraid of your
voice.
SW: (Clears his throat) Shut up.
MM: This next match should be a great one. Lonestar has wanted a shot at TKO
for some time now.
SW: Well, he did get some kind of chance at TKO already. I mean, he's hit
TKO with the bat about 20 times already.
MM: You, well, you don't understand the value of a one on one win, do you?
SW: What's so big about one-on-one? It's way overrated.
MM: So were your wrestling skills.
SW: HEY! I was the Heavyweight Champion back in my day!
MM: Yeah, and who did you lose the belt to?
(Sam stares at Mike)
SW: I don't know. I think I forgot who.
MM: Well, let me just check. Oh (Points at page) Look! It was ME! How could
I forget?
SW: Be quiet.
MM: No, you should be quiet, Funny Voice!
(A bullet whines across the speakers and the crowd EXPLODES! Lonestar comes
running to the ring, wearing black tights with black, muscle T-shirt. A blue
star is embroidered onto the back of the shirt, and TEXAS NIGHTS is written
up his legs and boots)
SW: Another guy who knows how to make an entrance. The UNWF is just full of
showboats.
MM: Hey! It's entertainment!
(The theme from Pulp Fiction blares on over the PA, and TKO walks to
ringside, with a neck brace on. He is limping, and Brian Edwards is
assisting him to the ring.)
MM: What the hell? What is he doing?
SW: He's......I don't know!
(Brian Edwards leans TKO against the guardrail, and runs over to get a
microphone)
Edwards: I apologize to all of you UNWF fans, but it seems that TKO can't
wrestle tonight.
(Massive booing is heard from the audience, and they begin to throw things)
Edwards: It seems that when Axel Aron attacked my good buddy here, he hurt
TKO's neck. I don't want TKO to be hurt here tonight, so he can't wrestle.
MM: Of all the low down, despicable things to do-
Edwards: Quiet! TKO, go on back to the dressing room. Lonestar, you'll have
to wait another day to be broken by TKO.
(Brian Edwards and TKO make their way back down to the dressing room, and
Lonestar begins yelling something at the referee)
DING! DING! DING!
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Lonestar
vs.
Tony "the Kid" Olson
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MM: What the hell is going on!
SW: Why did the referee ring the bell?
(The referee begins to count)
MM: I guess the match has started! I think........
SW: Well, he's up to four now.
MM: This has to be the most bizarre thing I have ever seen in my life.
SW: 6......7.......8
MM: Well, I guess you can give this one to Lonestar.
SW: 10!!!
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Winner: Lonestar
Via Disqualification
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MM: Another waste of a match by the BAB.
SW: I think TKO should just get in the damn ring and fight all ready.
MM: For once I agree with you. Anyway, in anticipation of our big Title
match, we are going to move right along to the next match. This one should
be huge. Two of the top competitors in the sport, both vying for the Mars
Candy Cruiserweight Title, will go at it. Last time the two met, Chad Cassia
defeated El Nino, but the match was a little hollow.
SW: I know. BDC and TKO jumped on Nino before Cassia could even come out.
MM: So, without further-
(Mike is cut off by thunder crackling on over the P.A, followed by a voice
saying "Severe Weather Conditions should be expected" and laser generated
lightning bolts dance around the arena. The crowd IGNITES! El Nino walks
down to the ring, slapping hands with the nearby fans. He is wearing a blue
wrestling suit, with lightening bolts streaking up the legs and his black
boots.)
Aura: First, from Lima, Peru. Weighing in at 205 lbs, ELLL
NIIIIIINNNNNOOOOOO!!!!!!!
SW: El Nino with the spectacular entrance. But would you actually expect
anything less?
Aura: And his opponent, CHAAAAD CAAAAASSSSIIIIIAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!
(The Outlaw Torn" rocks on to the speakers. Chad Cassia runs out to the ring
to a mediocre pop. He looks intense and ready to go. He is wearing a blue
wrestling suit with EQUALIZER written on them in black.)
SW: Chad hits the ring and immediately goes after El Nino with a flying
clothesline! He goes for the cover!
MM: Cassia is trying to end it early!
1....
2.......
NO! El Nino kicks out!
Now, Cassia picks up Nino and whips him to the ropes and goes for another
clothesline!
SW: NO! El Nino wraps around and turns it into a crucifix! But Chad Cassia
drops back and-
MM: SAMOAN DROP!
SW: What a move!
MM: Cassia picks up Nino again and.......bodyslam! Cassia is scaling to the
ropes. HE IS AT THE TOP!!!! HE COMES OFF WITH A SPLASH!!!!
SW: BUT EL NINO ROLLS AWAY!!!!
MM: WHAT ACTION!!!!
(El Nino gets up at the same time Cassia does and they both get into each
others' faces.)
SW: A slap from Cassia! El Nino throws a punch at Cassia but Cassia ducks
and kicks him in the stomach!
MM: CASSIA SIGNALS AND GOES FOR THE EQUALIZER DDT!!!!
SW: HE HITS IT!!!!
MM: Cassia goes for the cover!
1...
2...
NO, Cassia picks up El Nino! He's not finished with him yet! He picks up
Nino and goes for a suplex but Nino blocks it! Nino blocks another one! El
Nino gets Cassia up and...........thunderous suplex!
SW: El Nino is full of fire now and he picks up Cassia and whips him to the
turnbuckle, charging him, and hitting him with a splash!!! Chad Cassia is
looking woozy and El Nino hops up to the second turnbuckle and gives Cassia
a bulldog!
MM: El Nino goes for the pin.
1,,,,,
2,,,,,,,
NO!!! Cassia kicks out!
MM: El Nino drops down and starts to maul Cassia with punches. Rights and
lefts are
raining down on Cassia!!
SW:El Nino picks up Cassia and whips him to the ropes. Cassia bounces off
and ducks a clothesline! He comes back with one of his own! He picks up Nino
and whips him hard into the corner!!
MM: Oh... Nino hits it hard and flies off dazed!
SW:Cassia walks up and, HITS HIM WITH THE EQUALIZER!!!!
MM: HE GOES FOR THE PIN,
1......
2.........
3!!!!!
MM: IT'S OVER. AND CHAD CASSIA GETS A HARD FOUGHT VICTORY!!!!!
SW: Cassia hit that DDT twice!
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Winner: Chad Cassia
Via Pinfall
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MM: Fans, we'll be right back!
(The camera fades to a commercial as Chad Cassia exits the ring.)