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Saban-LSU bond the best each could manage at the moment

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David Swanger

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Dec 3, 1999, 3:00:00 AM12/3/99
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Saban-LSU bond the best each could manage at the moment
Nov. 30, 1999
By Dennis Dodd
SportsLine Senior Writer


The story of Tuesday's hiring of Nick Saban at LSU was
actually written 11 years ago.

In Everybody's All-American, Frank Deford's 1988
brilliant book-turned-movie traced the career of
fictional running back Gavin Grey trying to relive his
football glory at LSU. Real life never replaced Grey's
fleeting fame as a collegian.

Dennis Quaid's "Grey Ghost" made bad investments, had
marital problems, drank too much and eventually became a
pitiful, aging figure of another era.

Cashing in on the last shred of his fame, we see a
humbled, bloated Grey being hired as a pitchman for
artificial turf.

Switch off the projector and welcome to the state of LSU
football in 1999. Talk about life imitating art. The
Grey Ghost deteriorated from All-American to chump. LSU
football is a ghost of its former self, having
deteriorated from elite program to one that has posted
only three winning seasons in the last 11.

After an exhaustive search, it hired Michigan State's
Nick Saban to wake up the echoes on Tuesday. Impressed
yet? This is not to rip Saban, a 48-year-old who
seemingly has a constant roaming eye on the next best
job to come along. It is to rip LSU and what happened
to a once-great program.

There's only a handful of states with more high school
football talent than the Louisiana-Texas area: Florida,
California, Pennsylvania. There's no more loyal
following than the 80,000 who pack Tiger Stadium on
Saturday nights.

That's why it's hard to figure out what went wrong. The
state's best high school players have left the state for
better programs. The administration made bad hires.
Really, there's no one reason why LSU is no longer a
power. It just isn't.

It had to deal with that image when it went on the road
looking for a replacement for Gerry DiNardo. Two
accomplished coaches -- R.C. Slocum at Texas A&M and
Miami's Butch Davis -- quickly pulled their names out of
consideration.

LSU finally interviewed three people -- Saban, Kansas
State assistant Phil Bennett and Minnesota coach Glen
Mason.

Mason has a career record below .500, Bennett has never
been a head coach and Saban? His career record at
Michigan State (34-24-1) is exactly two victories better
than DiNardo's at LSU (32-24-1).

This is the best LSU could do, and they overpaid for it
to boot. For Saban, LSU is paying up to $1.5 million
per year which is the first, best and only reason to
take the job. Never mind that Saban has never won a
conference title unless you count that Mid-American
Conference co-championship with Toledo in 1990.

If Saban fails, he's set for life with a contract worth
$6.25 million over five years. If he succeeds, he
enhances his NFL profile. Get it? LSU probably wrecked
two programs on Tuesday. Given his track record, Saban
is not going to be a lifer.

After LSU's 3-8 season, it might take Saban four years
to get his first recruiting class to pay off. In
addition, Saban will coach for an athletic director who
didn't hire him. Current AD Joe Dean will retire in
June. Saban has been promised a hand in the hiring of a
replacement by chancellor Mark Emmert.

There's a potentially uncomfortable situation: the
coach hiring his boss.

Meanwhile, Michigan State's bright future is suddenly
clouded. It was projected to land a top 10 recruiting
class. It already has a commitment from Pennsylvania
blue-chip quarterback Jeff Smoker.

Who knows now? The Spartan assistant coaches went back
out on the road Tuesday after getting the word from
Saban. The assistants didn't know if they'd have a job
next month; how much can their heart be in recruiting?

Yes, this is about a school trying for years to capture
the magic of its past. And failing miserably. It has
been 20 years since the legendary Charlie McClendon
retired and a succession of six coaches passed through
LSU's revolving door.

That's an average of a new coach every 3.3 years. Some
didn't have the right personality. Some were too old.
Some were too young. A few were so scarred by the LSU
experience they never became head coaches again. All of
them didn't win enough to satisfy the powers at LSU.

DiNardo finally got the ax earlier this month. When
asked to stay on for the final game against Arkansas,
DiNardo said thanks but no thanks and cleaned out his
desk. What was the point?

<photo of Saban snipped> New LSU coach Nick Saban has
had 11 jobs in 26 years, never staying at one more than
five years.(AP)

That's exactly what someone should be asking Tuesday as
Saban becomes the latest coach to attempt to ascend to a
shaky throne. What was the point of subjecting another
decent coach to the ruin that has become LSU? What was
the point of making Saban the third-highest paid coach
in the profession?

Apparently Michigan State missed the exact point in time
when Saban became Knute Rockne. It saw LSU's offer and
waved goodbye. Saban deserves credit for lifting the
program out of the malaise of NCAA sanctions. He
doesn't deserve a deal that could reach $1.5 million per
year if he achieves incentives.

With that offer, LSU is setting Saban up as the new Rick
Neuheisel -- a youthful nouveau riche millionaire who
hasn't earned it. Also consider the fit. It isn't a
good one. Saban is a quiet, well-spoken child of the
Rust Belt. As a college coach, he's never coached south
of West Virginia and that was 20 years ago.

Did anyone at LSU check to see that the man has had 11
jobs in 26 years, never staying more than five? Saban
made his bones as a defensive coordinator with the
Cleveland Browns from 1991-94. His time in East Lansing
was peppered with various reports of Saban's interest in
NFL jobs.

Until this season's breakout 9-2 season, Saban's best
record at Michigan State was 7-5. True, Michigan State
is going to have few seasons like 1999 when it beat
Notre Dame, Michigan, Ohio State and Penn State. It was
a good time to get out.

But welcome to the real jungle, Nick. The SEC, as the
Brooklyn-raised DiNardo found out, is a different
animal. Not only do you have to beat Gators, Gamecocks
and Wildcats, there are lower forms of life always
biting at your heels.

Saban was speaking directly to them Tuesday at his
introductory press conference.

"We need to pull those things together in terms of
support and tradition," he said. "The thing that kills
more organizations is the vision from within."

LSU is not unlike a lot of schools with unreasonable
expectations and an unbelievable number of assistant
coaches disguised as boosters, donors, fans and
chancellors. Mike Archer went 10-1-1 in 1987 in his
first year at the school. He followed that with seasons
of 8-4, 4-7 and 5-6.

It degenerated into three years of unholy hell. Archer,
now the linebackers coach with the Steelers, was on a
national radio show recently. He spoke of driving
through the hills of Pittsburgh, barely able to pick up
a Baton Rouge radio station on a Saturday night after
another LSU loss.

The subject was familiar: Callers were ripping the
football coach to shreds.

Archer listened for about five minutes until the bad
memories all came flowing back. Then he turned off the
radio, the ghosts and the past.


--
David Swanger
Information Technology
Auburn University, AL
swa...@mail.auburn.edu

Thomas Rooney

unread,
Dec 3, 1999, 3:00:00 AM12/3/99
to

David Swanger wrote:
>
> Saban-LSU bond the best each could manage at the moment
> Nov. 30, 1999
> By Dennis Dodd
> SportsLine Senior Writer
>
> Dennis Quaid's "Grey Ghost" made bad investments, had
> marital problems, drank too much and eventually became a
> pitiful, aging figure of another era.

Hi.



> LSU
> football is a ghost of its former self, having
> deteriorated from elite program to one that has posted
> only three winning seasons in the last 11.

Hmmmmmm...



> After an exhaustive search, it hired Michigan State's
> Nick Saban to wake up the echoes on Tuesday. Impressed
> yet? This is not to rip Saban, a 48-year-old who
> seemingly has a constant roaming eye on the next best
> job to come along. It is to rip LSU and what happened
> to a once-great program.

You see, that's the problem right there. I sleep with one of these
LSU-types, so I feel qualified to comment on what a horseshit myth this
really is. Saying LSU is a once-great football program is like saying
Poland was a once-great sea power. It sounds good, but it just doesn't
jive with the facts.


> There's no more loyal
> following than the 80,000 who pack Tiger Stadium on
> Saturday nights.

Yeah, loyal to booze. That's the most sobriety-challenged fan base on
the planet. If you ever want to see a glaring example of why LSU sucks,
just take a tour of the SEC pregame festivities. The Ole Miss kids dress
up and try to get laid. Georgia and Florida hold a cocktail party.
Auburn has the Tiger Walk. The Million Dollar Band serenades the
tailgaters at Bryant-Denny. The Vols fans sail down the Tennessee River
in a floating parade. And then there's LSU. At LSU, all you see is a
bunch of pickled ninth ward cajuns draining their Winnebago crappers in
the Tiger Stadium parking lot with a can of Dixie Beer in one hand and a
flyswatter in the other. And NO, sticking your drunk dick in between the
bars of Mike's cage doesn't count as a tradition. Clearly, LSU is the
Cousin Eddie of the SEC.

Saban is so screwed. They need to pay the guy $1.2 million to coach that
rag-tag football team and double that just to put up with those
backwater hayseed swampfreak fans. I give him two years tops.

Oh, and hi honey.

-----------------------
Tommy Rooney/NU '91

Czar Christopher I

unread,
Dec 4, 1999, 3:00:00 AM12/4/99
to
Thomas Rooney <gel...@concentric.net> wrote:
:
: David Swanger wrote:
:>
:> Saban-LSU bond the best each could manage at the moment

:> Nov. 30, 1999
:> By Dennis Dodd
:> SportsLine Senior Writer
:>
:> Dennis Quaid's "Grey Ghost" made bad investments, had

:> marital problems, drank too much and eventually became a
:> pitiful, aging figure of another era.
:
: Hi.
:
:> LSU

:> football is a ghost of its former self, having
:> deteriorated from elite program to one that has posted
:> only three winning seasons in the last 11.
:
: Hmmmmmm...
:
:> After an exhaustive search, it hired Michigan State's

:> Nick Saban to wake up the echoes on Tuesday. Impressed
:> yet? This is not to rip Saban, a 48-year-old who
:> seemingly has a constant roaming eye on the next best
:> job to come along. It is to rip LSU and what happened
:> to a once-great program.
:
: You see, that's the problem right there. I sleep with one of these

: LSU-types, so I feel qualified to comment on what a horseshit myth this
: really is. Saying LSU is a once-great football program is like saying
: Poland was a once-great sea power. It sounds good, but it just doesn't
: jive with the facts.
:
:> There's no more loyal

:> following than the 80,000 who pack Tiger Stadium on
:> Saturday nights.
:
: Yeah, loyal to booze. That's the most sobriety-challenged fan base on

: the planet. If you ever want to see a glaring example of why LSU sucks,
: just take a tour of the SEC pregame festivities. The Ole Miss kids dress
: up and try to get laid. Georgia and Florida hold a cocktail party.
: Auburn has the Tiger Walk. The Million Dollar Band serenades the
: tailgaters at Bryant-Denny. The Vols fans sail down the Tennessee River
: in a floating parade. And then there's LSU. At LSU, all you see is a
: bunch of pickled ninth ward cajuns draining their Winnebago crappers in
: the Tiger Stadium parking lot with a can of Dixie Beer in one hand and a
: flyswatter in the other. And NO, sticking your drunk dick in between the
: bars of Mike's cage doesn't count as a tradition. Clearly, LSU is the
: Cousin Eddie of the SEC.
:
: Saban is so screwed. They need to pay the guy $1.2 million to coach that
: rag-tag football team and double that just to put up with those
: backwater hayseed swampfreak fans. I give him two years tops.
:
: Oh, and hi honey.

Have you ever seen that episode of WKRP where they blow up the
transmitter and Johnny thinks it's the phone cops? That's a
good one.

--
Czar Christopher I rec.sport.football.college
"I consider myself a hardy veteran of the USENET wars, but this
particular newsgroup has to be the most cliquish and inaccessible
of all. It's even ahead of rec.sport.basketball.pro" --Chad Scott

John Rogers

unread,
Dec 4, 1999, 3:00:00 AM12/4/99
to
On 03 Dec 1999 23:56:33 EST, Thomas Rooney <gel...@concentric.net>
was filled with the Holy Spirit in Loachapoka, AL for saying:

>You see, that's the problem right there. I sleep with one of these
>LSU-types, so I feel qualified to comment on what a horseshit myth this
>really is.

Dem coon-ass boys are KNOW to be kinky.

>Oh, and hi honey.

Sweet-talker...


John Rogers
AU Class of 1985
I *am* Al Del Greco...

Stephen Jaros

unread,
Dec 4, 1999, 3:00:00 AM12/4/99
to
Thomas Rooney wrote:
> At LSU, all you see is a
> bunch of pickled ninth ward cajuns draining their Winnebago crappers in
> the Tiger Stadium parking lot with a can of Dixie Beer in one hand and a
> flyswatter in the other. And NO, sticking your drunk dick in between the
> bars of Mike's cage doesn't count as a tradition.

Sadly, this is a pretty damn accurate depiction of what happens at the
parking lot outside Tiger Stadium on game day!

jim andrews

unread,
Dec 4, 1999, 3:00:00 AM12/4/99
to
Czar Christopher I wrote:
>
> Dylan F. Alexander <dy...@tamu.edu> wrote:
> : In article <Tn124.32138$JY6....@dfw-read.news.verio.net>, Czar
> : Christopher I <ob...@vb.pbz.invalid> wrote:
> :

> : }Thomas Rooney <gel...@concentric.net> wrote:
> : }:
> : }: David Swanger wrote:
> : }:>
> : }:> Saban-LSU bond the best each could manage at the moment

> : }:> Nov. 30, 1999
> : }:> By Dennis Dodd
> : }:> SportsLine Senior Writer
> : }:>
> : }:> Dennis Quaid's "Grey Ghost" made bad investments, had

> : }:> marital problems, drank too much and eventually became a
> : }:> pitiful, aging figure of another era.
> : }:
> : }: Hi.
> : }:
> : }:> LSU

> : }:> football is a ghost of its former self, having
> : }:> deteriorated from elite program to one that has posted
> : }:> only three winning seasons in the last 11.
> : }:
> : }: Hmmmmmm...
> : }:
> : }:> After an exhaustive search, it hired Michigan State's

> : }:> Nick Saban to wake up the echoes on Tuesday. Impressed
> : }:> yet? This is not to rip Saban, a 48-year-old who
> : }:> seemingly has a constant roaming eye on the next best
> : }:> job to come along. It is to rip LSU and what happened
> : }:> to a once-great program.
> : }:
> : }: You see, that's the problem right there. I sleep with one of these

> : }: LSU-types, so I feel qualified to comment on what a horseshit myth this
> : }: really is. Saying LSU is a once-great football program is like saying

> : }: Poland was a once-great sea power. It sounds good, but it just doesn't
> : }: jive with the facts.
> : }:
> : }:> There's no more loyal

> : }:> following than the 80,000 who pack Tiger Stadium on
> : }:> Saturday nights.
> : }:

> : }: Yeah, loyal to booze. That's the most sobriety-challenged fan base on
> : }: the planet. If you ever want to see a glaring example of why LSU sucks,
> : }: just take a tour of the SEC pregame festivities. The Ole Miss kids dress
> : }: up and try to get laid. Georgia and Florida hold a cocktail party.
> : }: Auburn has the Tiger Walk. The Million Dollar Band serenades the
> : }: tailgaters at Bryant-Denny. The Vols fans sail down the Tennessee River
> : }: in a floating parade. And then there's LSU. At LSU, all you see is a

> : }: bunch of pickled ninth ward cajuns draining their Winnebago crappers in
> : }: the Tiger Stadium parking lot with a can of Dixie Beer in one hand and a
> : }: flyswatter in the other. And NO, sticking your drunk dick in between the
> : }: bars of Mike's cage doesn't count as a tradition. Clearly, LSU is the

> : }: Cousin Eddie of the SEC.
> : }:
> : }: Saban is so screwed. They need to pay the guy $1.2 million to coach that
> : }: rag-tag football team and double that just to put up with those
> : }: backwater hayseed swampfreak fans. I give him two years tops.
> : }:
> : }: Oh, and hi honey.
> : }
> : }Have you ever seen that episode of WKRP where they blow up the
> : }transmitter and Johnny thinks it's the phone cops? That's a
> : }good one.
> :
> : I watched "The Secret to My Success" tonight. Is it just me, or
> : was Michael J. Fox really a dork?
>
> Did you know that he has Parkinson's Syndrome?

Nick Saban has Parkinsons' Syndrome? Christ, why did they hire him?

jim andrews

jim andrews

unread,
Dec 4, 1999, 3:00:00 AM12/4/99
to
Czar Christopher I wrote:
>
> jim andrews <jand...@activepower.com> wrote:

> : Czar Christopher I wrote:
> :> Dylan F. Alexander <dy...@tamu.edu> wrote:
> :> : In article <Tn124.32138$JY6....@dfw-read.news.verio.net>, Czar
> :> : Christopher I <ob...@vb.pbz.invalid> wrote:
> :> :
> :> : }Thomas Rooney <gel...@concentric.net> wrote:
> :> : }:
> :> : }: David Swanger wrote:
> :> : }:>
> :> : }:> Saban-LSU bond the best each could manage at the moment

> :> : }:> Nov. 30, 1999
> :> : }:> By Dennis Dodd
> :> : }:> SportsLine Senior Writer
> :> : }:>
> :> : }:> Dennis Quaid's "Grey Ghost" made bad investments, had

> :> : }:> marital problems, drank too much and eventually became a
> :> : }:> pitiful, aging figure of another era.
> :> : }:
> :> : }: Hi.
> :> : }:
> :> : }:> LSU

> :> : }:> football is a ghost of its former self, having
> :> : }:> deteriorated from elite program to one that has posted
> :> : }:> only three winning seasons in the last 11.
> :> : }:
> :> : }: Hmmmmmm...
> :> : }:
> :> : }:> After an exhaustive search, it hired Michigan State's

> :> : }:> Nick Saban to wake up the echoes on Tuesday. Impressed
> :> : }:> yet? This is not to rip Saban, a 48-year-old who
> :> : }:> seemingly has a constant roaming eye on the next best
> :> : }:> job to come along. It is to rip LSU and what happened
> :> : }:> to a once-great program.
> :> : }:
> :> : }: You see, that's the problem right there. I sleep with one of these

> :> : }: LSU-types, so I feel qualified to comment on what a horseshit myth this
> :> : }: really is. Saying LSU is a once-great football program is like saying
> :> : }: Poland was a once-great sea power. It sounds good, but it just doesn't
> :> : }: jive with the facts.
> :> : }:
> :> : }:> There's no more loyal

> :> : }:> following than the 80,000 who pack Tiger Stadium on
> :> : }:> Saturday nights.
> :> : }:
> :> : }: Yeah, loyal to booze. That's the most sobriety-challenged fan base on

> :> : }: the planet. If you ever want to see a glaring example of why LSU sucks,
> :> : }: just take a tour of the SEC pregame festivities. The Ole Miss kids dress
> :> : }: up and try to get laid. Georgia and Florida hold a cocktail party.
> :> : }: Auburn has the Tiger Walk. The Million Dollar Band serenades the
> :> : }: tailgaters at Bryant-Denny. The Vols fans sail down the Tennessee River
> :> : }: in a floating parade. And then there's LSU. At LSU, all you see is a
> :> : }: bunch of pickled ninth ward cajuns draining their Winnebago crappers in
> :> : }: the Tiger Stadium parking lot with a can of Dixie Beer in one hand and a
> :> : }: flyswatter in the other. And NO, sticking your drunk dick in between the
> :> : }: bars of Mike's cage doesn't count as a tradition. Clearly, LSU is the
> :> : }: Cousin Eddie of the SEC.
> :> : }:
> :> : }: Saban is so screwed. They need to pay the guy $1.2 million to coach that
> :> : }: rag-tag football team and double that just to put up with those
> :> : }: backwater hayseed swampfreak fans. I give him two years tops.
> :> : }:
> :> : }: Oh, and hi honey.
> :> : }
> :> : }Have you ever seen that episode of WKRP where they blow up the
> :> : }transmitter and Johnny thinks it's the phone cops? That's a
> :> : }good one.
> :> :
> :> : I watched "The Secret to My Success" tonight. Is it just me, or
> :> : was Michael J. Fox really a dork?
> :>
> :> Did you know that he has Parkinson's Syndrome?
> :
> : Nick Saban has Parkinsons' Syndrome? Christ, why did they hire him?
>
> I don't know. I think that's what this article is about -- those
> cajuns are pretty stupid. Is that what this article suggests to you?

Yesssessess.

jim andrews

Czar Christopher I

unread,
Dec 5, 1999, 3:00:00 AM12/5/99
to
Dylan F. Alexander <dy...@tamu.edu> wrote:
: In article <Tn124.32138$JY6....@dfw-read.news.verio.net>, Czar
: Christopher I <ob...@vb.pbz.invalid> wrote:
:
: }Thomas Rooney <gel...@concentric.net> wrote:
: }:
: }: David Swanger wrote:
: }:>
: }:> Saban-LSU bond the best each could manage at the moment

: }:> Nov. 30, 1999
: }:> By Dennis Dodd
: }:> SportsLine Senior Writer
: }:>
: }:> Dennis Quaid's "Grey Ghost" made bad investments, had

: }:> marital problems, drank too much and eventually became a
: }:> pitiful, aging figure of another era.
: }:
: }: Hi.
: }:
: }:> LSU

: }:> football is a ghost of its former self, having
: }:> deteriorated from elite program to one that has posted
: }:> only three winning seasons in the last 11.
: }:
: }: Hmmmmmm...
: }:
: }:> After an exhaustive search, it hired Michigan State's

: }:> Nick Saban to wake up the echoes on Tuesday. Impressed
: }:> yet? This is not to rip Saban, a 48-year-old who
: }:> seemingly has a constant roaming eye on the next best
: }:> job to come along. It is to rip LSU and what happened
: }:> to a once-great program.
: }:
: }: You see, that's the problem right there. I sleep with one of these
: }: LSU-types, so I feel qualified to comment on what a horseshit myth this
: }: really is. Saying LSU is a once-great football program is like saying
: }: Poland was a once-great sea power. It sounds good, but it just doesn't
: }: jive with the facts.
: }:
: }:> There's no more loyal

: }:> following than the 80,000 who pack Tiger Stadium on
: }:> Saturday nights.
: }:
: }: Yeah, loyal to booze. That's the most sobriety-challenged fan base on
: }: the planet. If you ever want to see a glaring example of why LSU sucks,
: }: just take a tour of the SEC pregame festivities. The Ole Miss kids dress
: }: up and try to get laid. Georgia and Florida hold a cocktail party.
: }: Auburn has the Tiger Walk. The Million Dollar Band serenades the
: }: tailgaters at Bryant-Denny. The Vols fans sail down the Tennessee River
: }: in a floating parade. And then there's LSU. At LSU, all you see is a
: }: bunch of pickled ninth ward cajuns draining their Winnebago crappers in
: }: the Tiger Stadium parking lot with a can of Dixie Beer in one hand and a
: }: flyswatter in the other. And NO, sticking your drunk dick in between the
: }: bars of Mike's cage doesn't count as a tradition. Clearly, LSU is the
: }: Cousin Eddie of the SEC.
: }:
: }: Saban is so screwed. They need to pay the guy $1.2 million to coach that
: }: rag-tag football team and double that just to put up with those
: }: backwater hayseed swampfreak fans. I give him two years tops.
: }:
: }: Oh, and hi honey.
: }
: }Have you ever seen that episode of WKRP where they blow up the
: }transmitter and Johnny thinks it's the phone cops? That's a
: }good one.
:
: I watched "The Secret to My Success" tonight. Is it just me, or
: was Michael J. Fox really a dork?

Did you know that he has Parkinson's Syndrome?

--

Czar Christopher I

unread,
Dec 5, 1999, 3:00:00 AM12/5/99
to
jim andrews <jand...@activepower.com> wrote:
: Czar Christopher I wrote:
:> Dylan F. Alexander <dy...@tamu.edu> wrote:
:> : In article <Tn124.32138$JY6....@dfw-read.news.verio.net>, Czar
:> : Christopher I <ob...@vb.pbz.invalid> wrote:
:> :
:> : }Thomas Rooney <gel...@concentric.net> wrote:
:> : }:
:> : }: David Swanger wrote:
:> : }:>
:> : }:> Saban-LSU bond the best each could manage at the moment

:> : }:> Nov. 30, 1999
:> : }:> By Dennis Dodd
:> : }:> SportsLine Senior Writer
:> : }:>
:> : }:> Dennis Quaid's "Grey Ghost" made bad investments, had

:> : }:> marital problems, drank too much and eventually became a
:> : }:> pitiful, aging figure of another era.
:> : }:
:> : }: Hi.
:> : }:
:> : }:> LSU

:> : }:> football is a ghost of its former self, having
:> : }:> deteriorated from elite program to one that has posted
:> : }:> only three winning seasons in the last 11.
:> : }:
:> : }: Hmmmmmm...
:> : }:
:> : }:> After an exhaustive search, it hired Michigan State's

:> : }:> Nick Saban to wake up the echoes on Tuesday. Impressed
:> : }:> yet? This is not to rip Saban, a 48-year-old who
:> : }:> seemingly has a constant roaming eye on the next best
:> : }:> job to come along. It is to rip LSU and what happened
:> : }:> to a once-great program.
:> : }:
:> : }: You see, that's the problem right there. I sleep with one of these

:> : }: LSU-types, so I feel qualified to comment on what a horseshit myth this
:> : }: really is. Saying LSU is a once-great football program is like saying
:> : }: Poland was a once-great sea power. It sounds good, but it just doesn't
:> : }: jive with the facts.
:> : }:
:> : }:> There's no more loyal

:> : }:> following than the 80,000 who pack Tiger Stadium on
:> : }:> Saturday nights.
:> : }:
:> : }: Yeah, loyal to booze. That's the most sobriety-challenged fan base on

:> : }: the planet. If you ever want to see a glaring example of why LSU sucks,
:> : }: just take a tour of the SEC pregame festivities. The Ole Miss kids dress
:> : }: up and try to get laid. Georgia and Florida hold a cocktail party.
:> : }: Auburn has the Tiger Walk. The Million Dollar Band serenades the
:> : }: tailgaters at Bryant-Denny. The Vols fans sail down the Tennessee River
:> : }: in a floating parade. And then there's LSU. At LSU, all you see is a
:> : }: bunch of pickled ninth ward cajuns draining their Winnebago crappers in
:> : }: the Tiger Stadium parking lot with a can of Dixie Beer in one hand and a
:> : }: flyswatter in the other. And NO, sticking your drunk dick in between the
:> : }: bars of Mike's cage doesn't count as a tradition. Clearly, LSU is the
:> : }: Cousin Eddie of the SEC.
:> : }:
:> : }: Saban is so screwed. They need to pay the guy $1.2 million to coach that
:> : }: rag-tag football team and double that just to put up with those
:> : }: backwater hayseed swampfreak fans. I give him two years tops.
:> : }:
:> : }: Oh, and hi honey.
:> : }
:> : }Have you ever seen that episode of WKRP where they blow up the
:> : }transmitter and Johnny thinks it's the phone cops? That's a
:> : }good one.
:> :
:> : I watched "The Secret to My Success" tonight. Is it just me, or
:> : was Michael J. Fox really a dork?
:>
:> Did you know that he has Parkinson's Syndrome?
:
: Nick Saban has Parkinsons' Syndrome? Christ, why did they hire him?

I don't know. I think that's what this article is about -- those
cajuns are pretty stupid. Is that what this article suggests to you?

--

Steve Casburn

unread,
Dec 6, 1999, 3:00:00 AM12/6/99
to
In article <3848B917...@concentric.net>, Thomas Rooney
<gel...@concentric.net> wrote:
>
>
> I sleep with one of these LSU-types [...]


Hey to Harp.

> Oh, and hi honey.


"Is this what you do all day?"

Steve

--
Steve Casburn (cas...@gslis.utexas.edu)
"Shut up he explained"
-- Ring Lardner, Jr.

Thomas Rooney

unread,
Dec 6, 1999, 3:00:00 AM12/6/99
to

Steve Casburn wrote:
>
> In article <3848B917...@concentric.net>, Thomas Rooney
> <gel...@concentric.net> wrote:
> >
> >
> > I sleep with one of these LSU-types [...]
>
> Hey to Harp.
>
> > Oh, and hi honey.
>
> "Is this what you do all day?"


<<< face resting in hands >>>>

----------------------
Tommy Rooney/NU '91

Scott Harper

unread,
Dec 7, 1999, 3:00:00 AM12/7/99
to
In article <casburn-0612...@dial-28-9.ots.utexas.edu>, cas...@gslis.utexas.edu (Steve Casburn) wrote:
>In article <3848B917...@concentric.net>, Thomas Rooney
><gel...@concentric.net> wrote:
>>
>>
>> I sleep with one of these LSU-types [...]
>
>
> Hey to Harp.

Did Shania go to LSU?


harp
austin,tx

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