Kook Appraisal Test V2.1 (fwd)

[Chris K. Hepburn]

Greetings all! Let me start by apologizing for the fact that this isn't
about anything remotely period, however, it does, for some strange reason
seem appropriate to crosspost here.

I found it on rec.humor.funny this morning and I thought it was a riot.

Chris

---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Mon, 21 Sep 1998 19:30:00 PDT
From: LucF...@aol.com
Newsgroups: rec.humor.funny
Subject: Kook Appraisal Test V2.1

Kook Appraisal Test (KAT or KAT Index)

Instructions :

In this section give yourself ONE point for every YES answer.
Give yourself additional points for multiple occurences.

Grading scale follows questions.

Have you ever :

1. Been the first to go ad-hominem in a newsgroup debate.
2. Accused someone of breaking a non-existant Federal Law.
3. Called a properly formatted cancel of a BI>20 article a *forged cancel*
4. Ranted about *Free Speech* when a moderator rejected your article.
Two points if it's spelled "FREE SPEACH".
5. Complained to someone's ISP when you got spanked in a flame war.
6. Been complained about to your ISP deservedly.
7. Flamed someone from an anonymous account.
8. Made a spelling flame.

In this section give yourself TWO points for every YES answer.
Give yourself additional points for multiple occurences.

1. Called someone a pedophile or drug pusher without proof.
2. Ranted about *Free Speech* when an anti-spammer cancelled your article.
3. Posted to a newsgroup via sock-puppet.
4. Thought about becoming a Freedom Knight.
5. Voted via sock-puppet in a Big Eight vote.
6. Defended a well known kook.
7. Been Nominated for a Kook award.
8. Called someone a *NAZI* or otherwise invoked Godwin's Law.

In this section give yourself THREE points for every YES answer.
Give yourself additional points for multiple occurences.

1. Threatened to kill or cause bodily harm to another via mail or post.
2. Stalked/harassed an opponent off-line.
3. Mail-bombed anyone.
4. Spammed a newsgroup.
5. Posted a forged or altered newsgroup article.
6. Lost an account due to abuse.
7. Won a kook award
8. Threatened a groundless lawsuit via mail or post.
9. Had a FAQ posted about your kookiness.

Scale/Rank :

1 - 5 points : Kook Wannabe. Read Grubor's posting history on dejanews.
You have much to learn. You may have just screwed up once.

6 - 10 points : Journeyman Kook. Continue to mimic the real kooks.
You could be a contender.

11 - 20 points : Kook First Class. Still a lesser light, but you HAVE arrived!

21 - 30 points : Kook cum Laude. Someone is considering writing a FAQ about
you.

31 + points : Kook Magna cum Laude. You have a FAQ.
You've won all the big awards.
You can leap tall newbies with a single bound.

[Note: originally posted to alt.usenet.kooks by Cipher [at] mindspring.com;
reprinted with permission. This is version 2.1, if my records are correct.]

--
Selected by Jim Griffith. MAIL your joke to fu...@netfunny.com.

Support the EFF today.
Read my letter at http://www.templetons.com/brad/eff.html to find out why.

This joke's link: http://www.netfunny.com/rhf/jokes/98/Sep/kat.html

[Bryan J. Maloney]

I protest this alleged "test" most vehemently. I am no more than a mere
"Journeyman Kook" by this "test". It was obviously invented by Nazi
sympathizers in violation of Federal Code 19/e-4c, a lawsuit will be
pending.

--
-  "God created women equal with men"   ... "There are many women who
are better than men."--St. Kosmas Aitolos
http://www.people.cornell.edu/pages/bjm10/

[Vlad de Jaffa]

Bryan J. Maloney wrote:
>
> I protest this alleged "test" most vehemently. I am no more than a mere
> "Journeyman Kook" by this "test". It was obviously invented by Nazi
> sympathizers in violation of Federal Code 19/e-4c, a lawsuit will be
> pending.
>

That may be, Bryan, but you and Dennis are OUR kooks. :-)

Vlad

[Dennis O'Connor]

Vlad de Jaffa wrote in message <36101B...@earthlink.net>...

Hardly. My score is 2.5 (You get to figure out which two and
a half) if the scoring is restricted to the past 12 months.

Trust me: I _used_ to be a kook, I know the difference.
You probably haven't experienced kooks if you think Bryan
or I qualify. Don't ask for a demo. :-)

BTW, don't take this as me taking offense. I haven't.
(Can't you tell ? :-)
--
Dennis O'Connor dm...@primenet.com
Vanity Web Page: http://www.primenet.com/~dmoc/

[Bryan J. Maloney]

In article <36101B...@earthlink.net>, dej...@earthlink.net wrote:

> That may be, Bryan, but you and Dennis are OUR kooks. :-)

Some days it hurts even to smile...