hemrrhoids and drumming
DrumSpam
What can Drummers do to aleviate the discomforts due to hemrrhoids when
playing?
Do any of you find that playing certain types of music and or playing technical
syncopated fills bring on hemrrhoidal inflammation?
Ddrummer
can't believe this is a serious question... but if so, get a great stool (the
seat, not the other kind of stool), and I usually sit on a terrycloth towel...
Larry
ddru...@aol.com
"Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else."
Roland Van Owen
Dude! There's something in your mouth! It's a hook!
Pat McDonald
DrumSpam wrote:
I'm constantly dealing with hemmorhoids whenever I play. It seems like whenever
someone is given a microphone and given a chance to sing, it happens. They sing a
song, the crowd claps, the chicks want to screw them and BANG!!!--instantly they
start to swell and itch and burn! I think the biggest sigle cause of
hemmorrhoids in this century is the invention of karaoke! Give an asshole a
microphone and he instantly morphs into a huge hemmorrhoid!
The only option I've ever found is to play in a band that only does instrumental
music!--
; )
Pat
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"There's a fine line between stupid and clever." --- David St. Hubbins
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Buggy
Nothing helps more than a good fast Polka!
DrumSpam <drum...@aol.com> wrote in article
<19980308200...@ladder03.news.aol.com>...
Chris Cawthray
Hi Pat:
I was watching a show on the Discovery Channel up here in Canada called
"Travellers", essentially a travel show about some perky American "twenty
somethings" or whatever.
This was an episode in Nashville where they were demo-ing a country song
they'd written.
It was like 3am when I saw this (came home from a gig, turned on the TV..
you know...), but I could have sworn the drummer's name was Pat McDonald.
If it was you, was that a vintage SONOR kit you were playing? The lugs
looked somewhat "sabretooth" and the badge looked like the old 60's SONOR
rectangle... There were only a few shots of you and the kit, so it may
just have been wishful thinking on my part... ;)
anyway, just curious
take care
chris cawthray
dr...@inforamp.net
Greg
i just want to say that this thread is a RIOT!! i've dealt with many a
hemmoroids during shows. Preparation H just doesn't cut it!! I have to
give a big, "RIGHT ON!" to the dude that sits on the terry cloth!! anyone
going to the Modern Drummer Festival in May?
greg
--
--"fa ra ra ra raa ra ra ra raaa"
Colin Odden
> DrumSpam <drum...@aol.com> wrote in article
> <19980308200...@ladder03.news.aol.com>...
> > What can Drummers do to aleviate the discomforts due to hemrrhoids when
> > playing?
> >
> > Do any of you find that playing certain types of music and or playing
> technical
> > syncopated fills bring on hemrrhoidal inflammation?
> >
I'm a little embarrassed by this, and suggest that sensitive readers not
proceed. Turn back! First of all, we used to joke about playing long hours
and getting "drummers' butt," also referred to as "swamp ass." When I played
rock on a vinyl covered throne I'd get, well, uh, sweaty. This can be a real
pain in the ..., especially if you don't get to take a shower immediately
after playing. I never had any severe inflammation after playing, but
playing several hours in one night is less than pleasant.
I got a Roc-n-Soc bicycle seat and things were partly solved (I hate to
think of what that cloth seat is absorbing, tho...). however, I wanted to be
really comfortable when playing, and to avoid, you know, butt sweat. The
solution came when I used a couple of towels to insulate my drums in their
fibre cases for going out of town. I simply used the towels as extra
cushioning. Problem solved.
Then I joined the drunk-punk band. We play a lot of really loud raucous
stuff, and my role involves a lot more bashing and antics than in other
gigs. I found that I couldn't remain coherent while playing under hot stage
lights. One night I took my jeans off, threw them to the singer, and played
in boxers. What a relief. I think that playing in thin material and
maximizing ventilation could at least partly solve your problem.
Of course, hemorrhoids could partly be caused by friction...dunno how to
solve that.
--
Colin Odden
odd...@osu.edu
http://members.tripod.com/~Dynasonic
This Space For Rent
Ben Jacoby
Colin Odden (odd...@osu.edu) spake thusly:
: I got a Roc-n-Soc bicycle seat and things were partly solved (I hate to
: think of what that cloth seat is absorbing, tho...). however, I wanted to be
: really comfortable when playing, and to avoid, you know, butt sweat. The
: solution came when I used a couple of towels to insulate my drums in their
: fibre cases for going out of town. I simply used the towels as extra
: cushioning. Problem solved.
Yeah, the same thing goes for "net surfing butt" as well. I've used the
towels on the computer seat approach for years. (and I also hate to
think about what is going into my cloth roc-n-soc too. And even worse I
swear that stuff is *alive*. It seems to get into a chair and grow in
there like this huge bacteria culture!)
Since I got the roc-n-soc I haven't done this, but on my old throne I
made this "butt aerator" from one of those car seat deals that are sort
of like an open mesh that allows air to circulate under your butt. It
worked pretty good at keeping the sweat (and hence itch) down. I do have
to admit that it's not quite as dramatic as playing in boxers, for that
Collin holds the record.
Also when preparation H fails, try a little powdered alum. It will
pucker that sphincter right up and start it singing, but the good news is
that it will keep the butt sweat to a minimum for quite a while.
I knew this thread was going to have great humor potential!
--
Benjamin Jacoby | "Some rob you with a six-gun and some with
| a fountain pen." ..........Woodie Guthrie
(SPAM GUARD! Delete the no spam letters in name to email.)
Pat McDonald
Chris Cawthray wrote:
Yep. That was me. I had only been in town about 3 months when the guy
whose house I was living at got a call from a relative who works on the
show. They were going to be in Nashville and wanted to write and record a
song but they were getting all kinds of crap from the musician's union about
using union players and paying them scale and residuals and all that. The
production office wanted to know if they could find any non-union players to
aviod all the hassle. The crew guy called my roomate and he asked me if I
wanted to do it. Since I wasn't union at the time, I took it. It paid me a
grand total of 50 bucks. Whoopee! The funny thing was, this was right
when I started getting called for gigs in town and I was taking any gig that
I got called for ( and I still do!). Anyway, I had worked a happy hour gig
the day before, then a regular night gig, THEN a 3 a.m. to 6 a.m.
after-hours club gig!! I went home, got about 1 1/2 hours of sleep, got up
and went to the studio and cut the track and filmed all day! I was running
on coffee and hope! Brutal! It was fun though and GREAT exposure. I got
to track in Masterfonics' Tracking Room which is one of THE primo studios in
town. There have been ALOT of big records done there.
As far as the drums go, they are old vintage Sonors. Early 60's I'm
told. I have both Gretsch and Noble & Cooley for my main kits and the Sonor
kit I use mainly for jazz gigs and as a third backup in case my others are
in use. That was the case that day. I had one kit at one gig, another in
storage and the Sonors were all I had available. They actually came out
sounding pretty good. I bought them used about 12 years ago and have used
them a good bit since.
Pat
--
Jerry Summers
Ben Jacoby wrote:
> Also when preparation H fails, try a little powdered alum. It will
> pucker that sphincter right up and start it singing
What a picture! I had to stop laughing long enough to come up for
air....
Now to a more serious (yeah, right) side of the issue:
This wouldn't work with a standard throne without some significant
redesign/manufacturing, BUT ---
When I was working as a stagehand, a major symphony orchestra came to
our venue to play a concert. The tech rider specified that the
principal bassist needed an AC cord run out to his position on stage.
Very strange......
Turns out this bassist had a very bad roid problem, and had a special
stool with the center cut out and a small fan mounted in the hole.
=============================================================
I'll defend to the death my God-given right to be totally wrong.
Jerry Summers js...@ix.netcom.com
=============================================================
Stephen Mulholland
What a bunch of assholes.
Greg <twe...@postoffice.ptd.net> wrote in article
<tweeker-0903...@du36.scr.ptd.net>...
Matthew Gaither
Jerry Summers (js...@ix.netcom.com) wrote:
: Now to a more serious (yeah, right) side of the issue:
: This wouldn't work with a standard throne without some significant
: redesign/manufacturing, BUT ---
: When I was working as a stagehand, a major symphony orchestra came to
: our venue to play a concert. The tech rider specified that the
: principal bassist needed an AC cord run out to his position on stage.
: Very strange......
: Turns out this bassist had a very bad roid problem, and had a special
: stool with the center cut out and a small fan mounted in the hole.
I do not suffer from hemmoroids (i swear), but if you want to keep your
but dry i have a tip. Once after a gig, another drummer walked off with
my seat. The next gig i was forced to sit on milk-crates, and i liked
it alot. Your butt stays nice and dry, that's for sure; and it does have
a little bounce to it. It may not be the right height for everybody,
but it was perfect for me (also great when you forget to pack your throne,
no matter where you are, you can find milk-crates in a bind!). Get
yourself a soft terry cloth and you are in business. :-9
--
-matt
Gaither Custom Drums gai...@sas.upenn.edu
1325 N. 5th Street, Studio 1D http://www.sas.upenn.edu/~gaither
Philadelphia, Pa. 19122
(215)235-4313
cowboy22
My expert advice... have your bass player dab a little Preparation H on your
ass hole (back stage) just before playing a gig. It works for me. I suggest
you see a doctor.
Good Luck,
Lars Ulrich
Stephen Mulholland
I've suffered from the dreaded Rockfords for years, but I spotted an advert
in a local phone booth for a Madam Delilah Stern, who is offering a
treatment called "anal corrective therapy" , which I assume is
haemarrhoid-related - does anyone know of Madam Stern's reputation in the
field of proctology?
Fast Hands
Greg wrote:
>
> i just want to say that this thread is a RIOT!! i've dealt with many a
> hemmoroids during shows. Preparation H just doesn't cut it!! I have to
> give a big, "RIGHT ON!" to the dude that sits on the terry cloth!!
I agree, it's becoming a pain in the ass. but try sitting on a "donut",
used for recovery from, ummmm, delicate surgery of said condition. It
will take a little practice to play with one, but it might keep your
pain down.