Old smutty song series
Paul M. Gifford
suggested that I share some of those old songs I know (i.e., "collected").
With a few exceptions, this common type of song hasn't been thought fit for
publication, but, since we all have heard that the Internet's a hotbed of
scurrilous smut, I guess this is an appropriate place.
Here are a couple of songs, both to "The Girl I Left Behind Me":
Oh, she jumped in bed and covered up her head
And said I couldn't find her
But I knew damn well that she lied like Hell
'Cause I jumped right in behind her.
She upped in the bed and covered up her head
And said I couldn't find her
But I knew damn well that she lied like Hell
'Cause I seen her sausage grinder.
The next one:
Oh, I stuck my nose in a billy goat's ass
And the stink was enough to bind me
So I took my prick for a walking stick
And I led it right behind me.
These might be considered parodies. I've heard more modern parodies, of "Red
Wing" and "Silver Threads Among the Gold," but never got to record them.
Anybody know such trash? Or anything along this line?
Paul Gifford
Bob Norton
giff...@lib.flint.umich.edu says...
>
>These might be considered parodies. I've heard more modern parodies, of "Red
>Wing" and "Silver Threads Among the Gold," but never got to record them.
>Anybody know such trash? Or anything along this line?
>
>Paul Gifford
Well, I've got a tape of one of Oscar Brand's "Barroom & Back Room Ballads"
series that has Oscar and Pete Seeger (uncredited -- a blacklist days
recording---) singing a wonderful song called "Blinded By Turds"
John Allen XL/DZ 01444 234812 ;-
>As a result of my posts concerning "Lumberjack's Alphabet," some people have
>suggested that I share some of those old songs I know (i.e., "collected").
>With a few exceptions, this common type of song hasn't been thought fit for
>publication, but, since we all have heard that the Internet's a hotbed of
>scurrilous smut, I guess this is an appropriate place.
>
>Here are a couple of songs, both to "The Girl I Left Behind Me":
>
> Oh, she jumped in bed and covered up her head
> And said I couldn't find her
> But I knew damn well that she lied like Hell
> 'Cause I jumped right in behind her.
>
> She upped in the bed and covered up her head
> And said I couldn't find her
> But I knew damn well that she lied like Hell
> 'Cause I seen her sausage grinder.
>
>
> The next one:
>
> Oh, I stuck my nose in a billy goat's ass
> And the stink was enough to bind me
> So I took my prick for a walking stick
> And I led it right behind me.
>
>
>Wing" and "Silver Threads Among the Gold," but never got to record them.
>Anybody know such trash? Or anything along this line?
>
>Paul Gifford
Hi Paul,
The first of your songs is a fragment of a song I know as "The Wayward Boy"
(also to that tune), and here are the words. I learned it from my brother
round about 1960 in Edinburgh. I'm not sure where he got it, but I think it
was fairly new then.
Cheers /Yogi
THE WAYWARD BOY
***************
1) One day in May I took my way, when I heard a voice above me,
And a fair young maid looked down and said "I need someone to love me."
Says I "My dear, don't have no fear, for I have heard your pleading,
You'll find your joy with the Wayward Boy - he's got just what you're
needing."
2) "I've heard of you me Wayward Boy, your name is high exalted,
But I can't come down and I won't come down - me bedroom door is bolted.
Me father is a minister, me maidenhead doth cherish,
And every night he locks me in, so lonely I could perish."
3) Well the fence was small, so I shinned up the wall, until I stood
beside her.
In some alarm she lifted up her arm and grabbed some clothes to hide
her.
She jumped into bed and covered up her head and vowed I would not find
her,
But I knew damn well that she lied like Hell, so I jumped right in
behind her.
4) I drew her breast up to my chest and loves art did employ,
When I rang her bell, she knew damn well why they call me the Wayward
Boy.
Well the bed broke down and we fell to the ground and Pappy came
a-gunning,
I jumped through the glass and I landed on the grass, and he caught me
in the running.
5) As on I sped I turned my head, but a shotgun blast did find me,
And for weeks in bed I was picking out lead with a mirror held behind
me.
6) Well the years rolled by and I woke with a sigh, and fancy did remind
me,
So one fine day I took my way to the girl I left behind me.
She was still locked in to ward off sin, she did not look much older,
She had three little girls and three little boys, and a baby on her
shoulder.
Tune: The Girl I Left Behind Me.
Note: Verse (5) is short - always was as far as I know...
---
Email: etl...@etlxdmx.ericsson.se | John (Yogi) Allen
East Grinstead Hash House Harriers | On On in Sussex and Kent (UK)
Brighton GO Club | British GO Association (2D)
Folk Singer (vox unpopuli) | Guitar, Melodeon, Traditional
Jeff Price
perfomed by the Baltimore Consort. I suppose you
could consider it very early folk (or folky) music.
Jeff Price
In article <45m848$l...@erinews.ericsson.se>,
etl...@etlxdmx.ericsson.se says...
GMorgan675
1920's which includes the verses you have given. The kind of stuff that
most people today would considcer politicaly incorrect, but some of it
quite funny nonetheless.
Captain Morgan
Hiroshi Ogura
about old smutty songs.]
In article <gifford_p.5...@lib.flint.umich.edu>,
Paul M. Gifford <giff...@lib.flint.umich.edu> wrote:
>As a result of my posts concerning "Lumberjack's Alphabet," some people have
>suggested that I share some of those old songs I know (i.e., "collected").
>With a few exceptions, this common type of song hasn't been thought fit for
>publication, but, since we all have heard that the Internet's a hotbed of
>scurrilous smut, I guess this is an appropriate place.
[A delightfully dirty ditty deleted]
That reminds me. I have a small book titled "Rowdy Rhymes --
and biblous ballads gathered from many gay minstrels". The book is
exactly what it says: a collection of dirty ditties.
The book seems to have been printed cheaply and sold "under counter". I
can't find the date of publication, but I suspect it to be middle 1950's.
The publisher's identity is equally shady: "The Peter Pauper Press, Mount
Vernon, New York". The book has several verses attributed to "Earl H.
Emmons" and "Edward E. Paramore", and it mentions a certain "L. Harper
Mockmouse" as an assistant in the verse collection. It seems that these
characters were the master minds behind this Peter Pauper Press. Does
anybody in rec.music.dementia know who they really were?
The book has not only an extensive listing of the verses from
"Mademoiselle from Armentieres" (which was a subject of a thread in rec.
music.folk some time ago) but also some verses involving mademoiselles
from other places. For example,
Oh Mademoiselle from Gay Paree, parlez-vous.
Oh Mademoiselle from Gay Paree, parlez-vous.
The only thing that she gave me free
The doctors took away from me!
Hinky-dinky, parlez vous.
Then, there is a particular favorite of mine called "The Amsterdam Maid".
I'll try to type in the whole thing before my fingers become numb. (You
may hit "n" at this point: the verses will be rather long.)
In Amsterdam I met a maid --
Mark well what I do say,
In Amsterdam I met a maid,
And she was a mistress of her trade!
I'll go no more a-roving with you, fair maid.
[CHORUS]
A-roving, a-roving,
Since roving's been my ruin,
I'll go no more a-roving with you, fair maid.
I took that girl upon my knee --
Mark well what I do say,
I took that girl upon my knee,
Says she, "Young man, you're rather free!"
I'll go no more a-roving with you, fair maid.
I put my arm around her waist --
Mark well what I do say,
I put my arm around her waist,
Says she, "Young man, you're in great haste!"
I'll go no more a-roving with you, fair maid.
I touched that fair maid on the toe --
Mark well what I do say,
I touched that fair maid on the toe,
Says she, "Young man, you're rather low!"
I'll go no more a-roving with you, fair maid.
I felt that fair maid on the calf --
Mark well what I do say,
I felt that fair maid on the calf,
Says she, "Young man, not there by half!"
I'll go no more a-roving with you, fair maid.
I touched that fair maid on the thigh --
Mark well what I do say,
I touched that fair maid on the thigh,
Says she, "Young man, you're getting nigh!"
I'll go no more a-roving with you, fair maid.
I pinched that fair maid on the rear --
Mark well what I do say,
I pinched that fair maid on the rear,
Says she, "Young man, that's pretty near!"
I'll go no more a-roving with you, fair maid.
I stroked that fair maid on the breast --
Mark well what I do say,
I stroked that fair maid on the breast,
Says she, "Young man, you'll pass the test!"
I'll go no more a-roving with you, fair maid.
I took that fair maid up the stair --
Mark well what I do say,
I took that fair maid up the stair,
Says she, "Young man, you're nearly there!"
I'll go no more a-roving with you, fair maid.
I took that fair maid through the door --
Mark well what I do say,
I took that fair maid through the door,
Says she, "Young man, just one thing more!"
I'll go no more a-roving with you, fair maid.
I ripped that fair maid's velvet dress --
Mark well what I do say,
I ripped that fair maid's velvet dress,
Says she, "Young man, you'll never guess!"
I'll go no more a-roving with you, fair maid.
I gave one look and popped my eye --
Mark well what I do say,
I gave one look and popped my eye,
Says she, "I'M ED. SMITH OF THE F.B.I.!"
I'll go no more a-roving with you, fair maid.
A-roving, a-roving,
Since roving's been my ruin,
I'll go no more a-roving with you, fair maid.
That was more than enough... Like I said, if anybody knows anything more
about the Peter Pauper Press, please leave me a note.
--
Hiroshi Ogura | One man he drinks up his whiskey,
hir...@u.arizona.edu | Another he drinks up his wine.
Dept.Chem.,Univ.Az. | And they'll drink till their eyes are red with hate
Tucson, AZ 85721 | For those of a different kind. -- Richard Thompson
Bill Bracewell
book. In the context of Bawdy songs this is a very important book
(IMHO). So here is a short review.
Bawdy Ballads
Compiled & Edited by Ed Cray
C. 1989 Omnibus Press
ISBN 0.7119.1805.8
Order No. 45343
Previously published in 1970 by
Anthony Blond
56 Doughty Street
London WC1 <----- double entendre arf arf!
272 pages about 130 songs.
Ed says *the very popularity of such lore and its persistence in oral
tradition over time and space is a reason for the study of bawdy song.
While collectors beat ever more remote bushes, bringing to light ever
fewer folk song, the bawdy song flourishes*
He goes on to say *this is the first annotated collection of
English-Language bawdy songs offered for public sale without asterisk,
dash, or similar emendation of words considered offensive. As such, it
can serve as a guide to collectors yet to come, suggesting<snip> a full
text of a given song.*
He goes on to quote Stan Hugill admitting to bowdlerising a text *owing
to its ribald theme*
Melodies for each song are included and each song is annotated, often
stanza by stanza. The notes are a mine of other songs and variations. A
lot of the old favourites are here, with a bias towards the US - because
that is where he did his collecting.
He has found a middle ground between dry academia and a laymans
songbook but, by any standards, it is a remarkable scholarly work.
My only gripe is that some songs are edited to fit on the page! A fault
common to many songbooks.
The whole book is alight with his enthusiasm for the subject and its
humour.
I can heartily recommend it to anyone with an interest in bawdy songs or
even ordinary folk songs. Find out what the words *really* are to that
song youve been singing all these years! (:-)>
--
Barnacle!"Now here," said the Red Queen, "it takes all the running you
Bill ! can do, to keep in the same place. If you want to get
! somewhere else, you must run at least twice as fast as that!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bill Bracewell
>The first of your songs is a fragment of a song I know as "The Wayward
>Boy"(also to that tune), <snip> I learned it from my brother round
>about 1960 in Edinburgh. I'm not sure where he got it, but I think it
>was fairly new then.
<Wayward Boy words snipped>
When I read the above post I thought *I know that song* and reached down
my copy of Bawdy Songs ed. Ed Cray. Sure enough the Wayward Boy is
featured on the front cover. The words are substantially the same but
more explicit.
I was just going to point out differences but its probably easier to
quote it in full.
As for the date Ed Cary mentions Legman in *the Limerick* quoting a
verse from 1935 and Chappell tracing the song back to 1758! Certainly
it doesnt look like a modern song.
I think that Ed Crays book warrants a full review in this thread. I
will do a separate post for that so that this one doesnt get too long.
THE WAYWARD BOY
=================
1) I walked the street with my prick at my feet
When I heard a voice come to me,
And lovely maid looked out and said,
"I need someone to screw me."
Says I "My dear, you neednt fear,
For I have heard your pleading,
Its very plain Ill ease your pain
Ive got just what your needing.
2) "I've heard of you my Wayward Boy,
your name is known quite widely,
But I can't come down Im sad to say
My door is bolted tightly.
My father is a minister,
My maidenhead does cherish,
And every night he locks me tight,
So horny I do perish."
3) She stood out there in the midnight air
With the wind blowing up her hinder,
And her arse all bare and her cunt all hair,
So I climbed right up behind her
Said I Young maid, dont be afraid.
The pleasures can be thrilling.
If your someone who wants some fun,
The wayward boy is willing
4) She jumped into bed and covered up her head,
And she swore I couldnt find her,
But I knew damn well that she lied like Hell,
So I jumped right in behind her.
I shoved old Pete right through the sheet
And up her organ grinder,
The white of an egg ran down her leg
But the rest remained inside her.
5) On the very next stroke the damn bed broke down.
Her father came a-gunning.
I hit the floor with my prick all sore.
And got to my feet a-running.
I left that lass in my bare ass
As shotgun blast did find me,
For weeks in bed I was picking out lead
With a mirror held behind me.
6) As years went by and I thought with a sigh,
When fancy did remind me,
So one fine day I made my way
To the girl I left behind me.
She was still locked in to keep off men.
She didnt look much older,
She had had her joys, three girls, three boys,
And a baby on her shoulder.
--
Barnacle !"Now here," said the Red Queen, "it takes all the running you
Abby Sale
>Hiroshi Ogura (hir...@curacao.ccit.arizona.edu) wrote:
>[several verses sorrowfully deleted]
>: I touched that fair maid on the thigh --
>: Mark well what I do say,
>I have the last verse, slightly bowdlerized, as:
>And then I did get quite a shock...
>For her skirt was a kilt and her name was Jock...
Good verses. A last verse I have - I think from Richard Dyer-Bennet -
I put my main mast in her box
Mark well, etc
She said, "Young man, I've got the pox."
I'll go...
"The Maid of Amsterdam" is one of the best of the genre. I also like
the popular Scottish one, "Coller" (Although I don't know how to spell
it) As the young man progressively enters the house, up the stairs and
works his way slowly from the foot to the head of the bed.
--
Somewhere in Florida
Abby Sale - trying out a new net connection
--
Abby Sale
>Bawdy Ballads
>Compiled & Edited by Ed Cray
>C. 1989 Omnibus Press
>ISBN 0.7119.1805.8
>Order No. 45343
>272 pages about 130 songs.
>My only gripe is that some songs are edited to fit on the page! A fault
>common to many songbooks.
>I can heartily recommend it to anyone with an interest in bawdy songs or
I must substantially disagree with a small part of this. These faults
have been corrected in the 1992 edition,
The Erotic Muse
University of Illinois Press
ISBN 0-252-01781-1
433 pages; a few more songs, but far more extensive extra versions &
detailed notes on them. Excellent scholarship, as Bill noted, with
links to Child or other ancient sources. Fine bibliography. The good
writing & the general good humor (they're not obcene, they're bawdy,
because "you just can't be titilated while you're laughing") remains.
The book is even a good place to start any serious study of folk song.
Paul J. Stamler
: First is the miller, down by the mill
: For the want of water, his stones they lay still
: Up steps this fair damsel and sees him in want
: She run his old stones through the sluice of her cunt.
[rest of song regretfully snipped]
Sounds like a distant cousin of "The Ballad of Trades".
Peace.
Paul
Ed Cray
Rhymes" was not sold under the counter, even in the frightened 50's. It
was openly published by Peter Pauper Press, owned by the father of
longtime California Congressman Anthony Bielenson.
The songs in "Rowdy Rhymes" were all carefully edited to avoid the long
arm of the law.
Ed Cray
Hiroshi Ogura
Hmm... I did indeed think that the verses were rather tame by today's
standards, but I had attributed the apparent tameness to the shifting
values and not to an editing. Nevertheless, all the songs in the book
are very funny even by today's standards: obviously the editors did a
careful and superb job.
I would never have realized that the press was owned by a rather prominent
figure in the community. Thank you very much for the info!