FOOD vs. SEX- A final Tally
William Ian Gasarch
Well, here is the FINAL tally (for now) on the
FOOD vs. SEX. I have the names of 105 FOOD songs, and
only 85 SEX songs, that is novelty songs about these topics.
I am sure there are more of each, but it seems to me that
Food has the edge. One thing I have noticed, but throw open
to debate (reply to the net)-- there do NOT seem to be as many
sex songs as there used to be. Is it true? Has the AIDS
crisis inhibited sexual novelty as well as sexual activities?
Inquiring minds like mine want to know.
People are still urged to send me titles that are NOT listed here.
If I get enough, I will add them and repost.
FOOD SONGS
30,000 Pounds Of Bananas (Harry Chapin)
A Medely about Every Song ever Written . . . About Food". (Weird Al)
Addicted to Spuds (Weird Al. Parody of Addicted to Love?)
Alligator Wine (ditto)
Aunt Betty's Thanksgiving Dinner (J.D. Bean)
BBQ USA (Skid Roper and Mojo Nixon (bo-day-shus))
Bananas (Spike Jones Jr)
Beans, Beans, Beans
Blackstrap Molasses and the Wheatgerm Jam (By Jimmy Durante and others)
Boiled Chicken (Horowitz and Specter)
Boss of the Barbeque (A song about food AND sex)
Bread and Butter (The Newbeats)
Cafeteria Food (Weird Al)
Call Any Vegetable (Frank Zappa and the mothers of invention)
Cheeseburger in Paradise (Jimmy Buffett)
Cheese Boogey Deluxe
Chicken Cordon Blues (by Steven Goodman)
Cold Pizza For Breakfast.
Colonel Sanders thighs (To the tune of Bette Davis Eyes.)
Cookies, Pie, and Cake (Yogi Yorgesson)
Corn Dogs (The Bobs)
Don't Slay That Potato (Tom Paxton)
Eat It (Weird Al, a parody of 'Beat It')
Every Time I Eat Vegetables It Makes Me Think Of You - The Ramones
Feast of the Mau-Mau (Screamin' Jay Hawkins)
Fido meal (taste test of dog food)
Fish Heads (Barnes and Barnes)
Frankfurter Sandwitches (Joanne and the Streamliners)
Fussy Eater (George Carlin)
Girls Just Want to Have Lunch (weird Al again)
Gooey Gooey Pizza Pie
Gumball Wizard (You can guess the tune)
Hamster Love (sort of. It focuses on eating hamsters)
He Ate Too Many Jelly Donuts (by Pelvis)
He Loves To Nibble On My Cup Cakes
Head Cheese (Psychotic Pineapple)
How Lovely Cooks the Meat - Doris Day and Frankie Laine
Hungarian Goulash (Alan SHerman.to the tune of the Hungarian Rhapsody)
I Like Food (a 15 second song by The Descendents)
I Love Chocolate ... about chocolate.
I Love Onions
I Love Rocky Road (Weird AL. Tune of I love Rock and Roll)
I Want a Hot Dog For My Roll (Butterbeans and Susie)
I Won't Eat an Anchovy Pizza (unknown - heard on the Demento show)
I can never eat home again(The Detergents, tune of I can never go home again)
I like Beans (by Clam Chowder)
I've never seen a straight banana
Icebox Man (also George Carlin)
It Must Be Jelly cause Jam Don't Shake Like That
It's Much Too Late To Get Fries (Wally Wingert)
Japanese Banana (The Chipmunks)
Jerimiah Peabody's Polyunsaturated Quick Disolving Fast Acting
Johnny's Got A Yo-yo
Junk Food Junkie (Larry Gorce, 1975)
Kosher Delight (The Yiddish People)
Lasagna (Weird Al , a parody of Labamba (La Bamba))
Life In The Slaw Lane (Kip Adotta? the guy who did Wet Dreams)
Lime in the Coconut (Harry Nielson, from Nielson Shmielson (misspelled))
Lock the Snack bar (to the tune of Rock the Cazbar)
Lots'o Matzoh (Alan Sherman. to the tune of Shortnin' Bread)
Loving You Has Made Me Bananas - Guy Marks
Making Love In A Subaru (Damascus)
Micheal at the Smorgasboard (Again, you can guess the tune)
Month Python's Cheese Emporium (spoken word actually)
Month Python's Wizzio Chocolate Company (spoken word actually)
Music, Sex, and Cookies (Michael Spiro. Others have also done it)
My Bologna (Weird Al)
No Anchovies, Please (J. Geils Band)
Old Home Fill 'er Up and Keep On Truckin' Cafe (C.W. Mcall)
Oreo Cookie Blues
Pass The Other Udder (milking the world's largest cow)
Pineapple (played 12/16/79)
Potatoes are Cheaper (post depression song)
Recession Menu Mess Call - Brown Bag Blues Band
Reluctant Cannibal, The (Flanders & Swan)
Rubber Biscuit (Blues Brothers)
Savory Truffle (By the Beatles' (George Harrison) )
School Cafeteria (Wierd Al)
Seltzer Boy (Alan Sherman. to the tune of Water Boy)
Shoe Fly Pie
Somebody Told me (Same TITLE and tune as a regular song, but it IS about food)
Spam (Monty Python)
Spam (Weird Al. Tune of R.E.M. Stand)
Susushiyo (Steve Lehman and Egad!)
The Finest Length of Garden Hose sold at Sear's
The Food Song (Jerry Tenney and the Lost Tribe. Lists food ingredients?)
The Fruit Song (Martin Mull)
The Popcorn Song (Cliffy Stone)
The Princess Pupuli's Papaya
Theme to Rocky XIIII (Tune ``Eye of the Tiger'', is ``Rye or the Kaiser'' Al)
Toast (Paul Young and the Street Band)
Two Triple Cheese,Side Order of Fries (by Commander Cody)
Ukrainian Uranium Bread (Tim Cavanaugh)
Vegetables (Beach Boys Smiley Smile album)
Watchin' Joey glow
We Don't Wan't The Bacon (circa 1903)
We Like Bananas Because They Have No Bones (The Hoosier Hotshots)
We ain't got Lox (Early Alan Sherman tune- to the tune of We ain't got dames)
When Banana Skins Are Falling I'll Come sliding back to you
Who Hid The Halibut On The Poopdeck
Yes, We Have No Bananas (circa 1911, also by Spike Jones)
You Are What You Eat (Jonathon Coleman)
You Eat Too Much (dunno the author; have it on a Demento archive tape..)
You Smell Like Fish (by The Nervous Eaters)
_________________________________
zCaffeine Zombie (Duck's Breath Mystery Theater)
zChunder (by the Blue Pacific Sea)
zChunder Down Under (It mentions eating, drinking and barfing)
zCockaroache that ate Cincinatti
zFat (Weird Al, a parody of 'Bad')
zEat Mrs Goldfarb Eat (Alan Sherman)
zFat (Ray Stevens, different than Wierd Al)
zFat is in
zFeed Me (from Little Shop of Horrors) ..
zGrow Mrs. Goldfarb (Alan Sherman. to the tune of Glow little Glow Worm)
zGrow Mrs. Goldfarb - Allan Sherman
zGumball Wizard (to the tune of pinball Wizard)
zHail to Thee Fat Person (Al Sherman)
zHail to Thee, Fat Person! - Allan Sherman
zHow Many Burps In A Bottle Of Beer
zI Feel Like Throwing up (Weird Al, to the tune of I Feel Like Making Love)
zI Like Beer (Tom T. Hall)
zI Love You Because You're Fat
zI'm Heaving On A Jet Plane
zLittle Butterball - Allan Sherman
zMommy get me a drink of water (Danny Kaye)
zOh Catharina (Billy Murry) ("you must be leaner...")
zPleasant Tasting Green and Purple Pills (Ray Stevens)
zPsycho Chicken (a parody of Psycho Killer)
zRoly-Poly People (Judy Small)
zSomeone Ate The Baby (Shel Silverstein)
zSquirrels (parody of a song popular maybe 2-3 yrs ago 'Girls')
zThe Eggplant that ate Chicago
zThe Fat Man's Prayer
zThrow It Up
zTimothy (about canabalism)
zWho put the Benzadrine in Mrs. Murphy's Ovaltine
SEX SONGS
A Dirty Song (Bird and McDonald)
Be prepared
Boobie Chew Hormone gum
Big Balls
Big Bottoms (Spinal Tap)
Big Ten Inch - Bull Moose Jackson (1930' or 40's)
Boobs a lot - Holy Model Rounders
Boss of The Barbeque
Bounce your Boobies (Rusty Warren)
Boys Want Sex in the Morning (by Uncle Bonzai)
Butt Fuck (by Human Sexual Response)
Candy Rapper
Catholic Girls (Zappa)
Cry Out Loud (Shakers)
Davey gets a Lai in Hawaii (Ruth Wallace)
Derbytown
Dingaling
Davey's Dingy (Ruth Wallace)
Dynamo Hum (Zappa)
Earth Girls are easy (Julie Brown)
Fathers Top Draw
Fich Mir (Zappa)
Fig leaves are falling
Frigging In The Rigging (Sex Pistols)
Girlfriend inflatable
Girls just want to have fun but boys just want to have sex
Golden Globe Award - John Hartford
Harder than your husband
He loves to nibble on my cupcakes
I Had Sex with (FILL IT IN) (by Banres and Barnes)
Wet Dream
I Like 'em big and stupid (Julie Brown)
I Want Your Body, To Hell With Your Mind (bu Pam Windo and the Shades)
I got it from Agnes
I want to kiss her but(t)
I Want a Hot Dog For My Roll (Butterbeans and Susie)
Im Into Leather(Swingin Erudites. tune:Something About the Weather by10KManiacs)
Isn't it awfully good to have a penus
Johnny's Got A Yo-yo
Jumbo Go Away (Zappa_
Just Head (by The Nervous Eaters)
Keep Your Glands to Yourself (Swingin Erudites.tune Keep Your Hands to Yourself)
King of the Singles bars
Knockers Up (Rusty Warren)
Lady Madona
Lets do something Cheap and superficial
Little Doc Koop
Madiera
Making Love In A Subaru (Damascus)
Munching Martha's Muffin (Skid Roper and Mojo Nixon (root hog or die))
Music, Sex, and Cookies
Pack of Women
Party in my Pants
Pink Thing" (by XTC. About, ur, a penis.)
Polka Dot Undies
Roll It On Robby (Redgum, for safe sex campaign)
Rhythm Blues (a hilarious song about birth control)
Sex (by Berlin from Pleasure Victim)
Sex Farm (Spinal Tap)
She's got Dick in the palm of her hand
She's viborator depedant (Skid Roper and Mojo Nixon (root hog or die))
Single Women (SNL)
Sit On My Face by Monty Python
Smut
Smut (by Tom L)
Softsell
Surburban Boy
The Finest Length of Garden Hose sold at Sear's
The girl from Chicago
The Good Ship Venus (Sex Pistols)
The IPD (version of IUD for men! sung by Judy Small)
The Telephone Man
Theme from Deep Throat (by Linda & the Lollipops)
Undressa Vanessa
Vanna Pick me a letter
Walk with an Erection
Wet Dream
What Does Sex Mean to Me? (by Human Sexual Response)
Why Does It Hurt When I Pee? (Zappa)
You Left Me Sore by Todd Rundgren(from Something/Anything)
__________________________
(Not demented, just about sex)
*Pasties and a G-string by Tom Waits
*Kissing Willie by Jethro Tull
*most Aerosmith tunes including Love in an Elevator, Walk this Way, big 10"...
Ben Feen
He died with his ding-dong in his hand
Play the G-String
Battle of Kooamunga
#1 about food & sex,
G-string about sex (not much, tho)
Battle of Kookamunga is pretty tame
--
|Opus and Frodo live! | "Sometimes, when your cat just died and you've cut
off your favorite appendage(s) with a power saw and there's epoxy in the
Visine and you brush your teeth with Clearasil it helps to say 'What the
f*ck'" | This signature consists of non-blanks separated by blanks.
Biff Henderson
>You also forgot: "Turning Japanese" - I forget the group
The group is "The Vapors," another "where are they now" trivia question.
Stephen Hutchison
>You forgot:
<list>
You also forgot:
"Dancin' with myself" -Billy Idol
"She Bop" - Cyndi Lauper
"Turning Japanese" - I forget the group
All of which are about masturbation, and are arguably demented.
Marty Stevens
In article <7...@ihf1.UUCP> hu...@ihf1.UUCP (Stephen Hutchison) writes:
That was by the Vapors, never heard from before or since.
Maybe I'm being naive, but could you point it out a little?
I didn't get that reference.
Marty
--
"Fall mountains, just don't fall on me." -- Jimi Hendrix
Barry Fowler
How about:
My Girl Passed Out In Her Dinner (Chuck Wagon and the Wheels).
Barry Fowler
'Remembered another one...
Life-Sized, Wife-Sixed Blow Up Plastic Girl (heard it on KFAT when it
was still around).
Beer Shits (also heard on KFAT)
Nicholas J. Simicich
>
>In article <7...@ihf1.UUCP> hu...@ihf1.UUCP (Stephen Hutchison) writes:
>>"Turning Japanese" - I forget the group
>>All of which are about masturbation, and are arguably demented.
>
>That was by the Vapors, never heard from before or since.
>Maybe I'm being naive, but could you point it out a little?
>I didn't get that reference.
The claim I heard was that in the US, people's moms tell them that "If
you keep doing that, you'll go blind." In the UK, people's moms tell
them, "If you keep doing that, you'll turn Japanese...."
--
Nick Simicich --- uunet!bywater!scifi!njs --- n...@ibm.com (Internet)
Stephen Hutchison
:>"Turning Japanese" - I forget the group
:>All of which are about masturbation, and are arguably demented.
:That was by the Vapors, never heard from before or since.
:Maybe I'm being naive, but could you point it out a little?
:I didn't get that reference.
Easy. It's slang somewhere in England, or it was when the song came
out. One is "turning japanese" when the eyes narrow and squint in the
throes of etc. Listen to it again with that thought in mind. It's
quite unmistakeable.
Hutch