You Know You Are in Texas When . . .

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heekster

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Sep 2, 1998, 3:00:00 AM9/2/98
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> You notice your radiator is overheating, before you start your car.
>
> You no longer associate bridges over rivers with water.
>
> The thermometer in the lid of your Bar-B-Que Grill shows 150 degrees
> F, before you light it.
>
> You hear the weather forecast for 105 degrees without flinching.
>
> You discover in July that it only takes two fingers to drive your car
> because your steering wheel is so hot.
>
> You can make instant sun tea or sun tea instantly.
>
> You run the house a/c in the middle of winter so you can use your
> fireplace.
>
> The best parking is determined by shade . . . not distance.
>
> Hotter water comes from the cold water tap than the hot one.
>
> You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
>
> Sunscreen is sold year round; it is always kept right at the checkout
> counter.
>
> Sunscreen with less than 50 spf is called 'hand cream."
>
> You put on fresh sunscreen just to go check the mail box.
>
> Some fools market mini-misters for joggers and some other fools will
> actually buy them. Worse . . . a lot of fools actually try to jog.
>
> When hot air balloons can't rise because the outside air is hotter
> than the air inside the balloon.
>
> You see two trees fighting over a dog.

Jeff Holmes

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Sep 4, 1998, 3:00:00 AM9/4/98
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You're in Texas when...

<snipped for bandwidth>

For all of you here, it's all true...hilarious but TRUE.

JD in Baytown


Jimbo Combs

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Sep 5, 1998, 3:00:00 AM9/5/98
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heekster posted some funnies, then...

>
>Jeff Holmes wrote:
>
><snipped for bandwidth>
>
>For all of you here, it's all true...hilarious but TRUE.
>

Second hottest summer on the record books in Dallas.

The earth here has a lot of clay in it. When the heat builds
up and things dry out, there are a lots of cracks that form
in the top soil.

It's been so hot and so dry for so long, that there are cracks
in my yard that are so wide and so deep, that if you were
to drop a penny down one of 'em, it would melt before
it hit bottom.

--
Jim Combs / ASSHOLE#34 / '91 XLH 1200 "Peg Killer " / '88 FXRP


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