poll - funniest thing in r.m.r ?
A.J.Kleipass
A.J.Kleipass
gossamer wrote in message <6mn43n$2jc$1...@news.bconnex.net>...
>Just wondering what all of you think is the funniest thing you have seen in
>this group.
>My vote would be for the MR swimsuit issue ( with Koester's keester and
>Hiediger in a thong. ( with apoligies to the afore mentioned).
>
>Well what do you think?
>
Darn, I missed that one. :(
How about the "photo of Big John".
A.J.Kleipass owin...@mindspring.com
Webmaster....NYO&W Modelers SIG - http://nyow.railfan.net
Member O&W RHS - http://www.nyow.org
Keep the newsgroups FUN !.........if you see a spider, SHOOT IT !!!
gossamer
Just wondering what all of you think is the funniest thing you have seen in
this group.
My vote would be for the MR swimsuit issue ( with Koester's keester and
Hiediger in a thong. ( with apoligies to the afore mentioned).
Well what do you think?
Eric May
JeffFinchX
I actually have quite a large collection of funny stuff I have saved off of
this group. Both of my favorites had to do with cats. The author of the
second one was not the person who posted it and I didn't save the first one's
author's name or the dates when they were posted. I have read these aloud to
groups of people and had trouble getting through them due to laughing so hard.
Anyway, for those who missed them the first time, here they are:
***************************************************************************
We were "kitten-sitting" for my Aunt while she was out of town. One morning,
unknown to me, the kitten had squeezed through one of my tunnels and was
napping restfully inside my mountain. You can guess the following. As soon as
my engine entered the tunnel, the next few minutes looked like the perfect
earthquake simulation. The ground shook, other engines and cars were derailed,
trees and buildings fell over, and you could almost here the people screaming.
The mountain rocked back and forth while the screaming kitten did battle with
my trusty CP Rail F7. Once she exited the mountain, which for ever after
always looked like a volcano, the path of destruction went diagonally off my
table through the town and freight yard. When she finally emerged from under
the basement steps, it took some time to untangle her from the powerlines she
had made off with.
The poor F7 was stripped of every piece that wasn't molded to the body. I
considered painting it army colors and telling everyone I was modelling a
Japanese Godzilla movie!
**************************************************************************
Categenesis 1:1 - The Beginning
In the beginning was the flat piece of wood and the wood was without contour
and dull.
And Preston looked at the board and said, Let's turn it into a model train
town.
And his kids said that this was good.
On the first day, Preston divided the town into the flat part, which he called
easy to build, because it was flat and the flatness was on the face of the
board; and the hilly part he called difficult, being lumpy and requiring a lot
of Styrofoam, wire screening and plaster. And this part he called hell.
And on the second day, Preston mixed patching plaster and brown dye, that the
earth should be earth-colored, and he did soak newspaper strips in the plaster
and did build the entire landscape in less than a day. And the patching plaster
dried and turned to dust, even as the dust of the earth, and did blow away.
And Preston was wroth and without restraint.
And the kids said this was no good.
On the third day, Preston read up in the Book of Train Towns, that he might
understand that he should have used Plaster of Paris, and he did kick himself.
And the kids said this was good.
AND ON THE FOURTH DAY, Preston mixed the Plaster of Paris and the dye, that the
earth should be earth-colored, and he did soak newspaper strips in the plaster.
And the plaster did harden instantly, before Preston got two strips of paper
down on the board.
And he was wroth and without restraint.
And the kids trembled and hid themselves from the face of Preston, and said
this was no good.
And then did Preston read up more in the Book of Train Towns, that vinegar
would keep the plaster from hardening so fast, and he did again mix the plaster
and the dye and lay the paper strips on the flat, easy part of the board.
And the kids said this was good.
And on the fifth day, Preston started working on the hills and they did look
like hell, as he had named them. Yea, they did look like great mounds of goopy
chocolate ice cream, and he did tell the kids that if they said it was no good
he would ground them for a week, that they could not leave their rooms nor see
the TV, and they did say nothing.
And Preston said this was good.
And on the sixth day did he run out of dye and go buy more of the same brand
and the same color, but the new dye did not match the old dye, the one being a
pinkish beige and the other being like mud, and Preston did say he did not care
anymore.
And he did finish the train town landscape anyway.
And he did look upon the face of the train town and he did not say, This is
good.
But he did say, It will do.
NOW THERE WAS a cat in the House of Preston.
This cat was the most devious of the creatures in the House of Preston, even
unto the point of evil. And the cat was jealous of the attention poured upon
the train town.
And on the seventh day did the cat leap upon the train table and begin to claw
the newly laid plaster, causing earthquakes and rending the earth. The cat did
peel back the strips till the newspaper sports scores showed through the middle
of the train town where the courthouse was supposed to be.
And Preston was wroth and the kids did make lamentations unto the high heavens.
And the cat had once again proven that it was the anti-Preston, and the train
town was ruined. Yea, even before the tracks had been laid.
And Preston did curse the cat and say, Because thou hast done this thing,
though shalt crawl up on they belly and thou shalt heave thy food upon the rug
and be curious even unto death and man shall smite thee with the toe of his
boot.
And the cat did lick her paw and say, Yeah, so what else is new?
By Preston Filbert
*********************************
To reply via email, delete: X
*********************************
Robert Pearce
On Tue, 23 Jun 1998 gossamer informed rec.models.railroad that :
I'm afraid I'm going to have to vote for Big John's lonely hearts advice
to me (as rpear...@aol.com) in the "Wives and Model Railroads" thread
some while back.
--
Rob Pearce
Chief Engineer of the Sump, Laisse and Huneausware Railway
Visit my web site at http://www.bdt-home.demon.co.uk/
Bruce H. Stull
May I humbly add?
Many years ago I was holding a clinic for simple electronic
lighting control circuits at a PCR meet in Long Beach, California.
Since I divulged the circuits for kits our company sold, I did not
feel it unethical to suggest attendees consider kits from many
manufacturers - easy to assemble, low in cost, proven operational,
easy to "troubleshoot" (you built it), guaranteed by reputable
suppliers, etc.
Insinuating free replacement of inadvertently damaged components,
I asked the question "If your cat knocks a part off of the
workbench and you return it to us, what do you think we are going
to do"?
A voice from the back of the room asked "Send me a new cat"?
Bruce