In search of sayings
opulen...@earthlink.net
whistling lips", "I'm hornier than a two peckered billygoat", "I've got
to piss so bad my teeth are floating" and others of that ilk. If you
know of any or a site where I might find some, please send as many my
way as you know of.
thank you
Eurasmus B. Black
It don't amount to a huckleberry in a honey bear's asshole.
(Nat Brown from Cape Cod born abt. 1880)
It ain't who you know, it's who you blow.
(Cape Cod circa 1950)
Keith
Rhonda Crawford
Rhon
Rhonda Crawford
sad or depressed, "so low, he could sit on a Kleenex and dangle his feet."
Major M
Well, call me Virginia and watch me reel!
In article <36A8031E...@earthlink.net>,
opulen...@earthlink.net says...
Boris
'There's only a week between a good and a bad haircut'
opulen...@earthlink.net wrote in message
<36A8031E...@earthlink.net>...
William E. Hamilton
"Hamilton, you have all your marbles, there just not all round".
Eurasmus B. Black wrote:
>
> opulen...@earthlink.net wrote:
> >
> > I'm in search of regional sayings such as "It's windier than a bag of
> > whistling lips", "I'm hornier than a two peckered billygoat", "I've got
> > to piss so bad my teeth are floating" and others of that ilk. If you
> > know of any or a site where I might find some, please send as many my
> > way as you know of.
> >
> > thank you
>
William E. Hamilton
out to email.ix.netcom.com
>In article <36A8031E...@earthlink.net>, opulen...@earthlink.net says
>...
>> I'm in search of regional sayings such as "It's windier than a bag of
>> whistling lips", "I'm hornier than a two peckered billygoat", "I've got
>> to piss so bad my teeth are floating" and others of that ilk. If you
>> know of any or a site where I might find some, please send as many my
>> way as you know of.
>>
>> thank you
>>
>I gotta piss like Sunday morning.
It rained like a cow pissing on a flat rock (Philipines)
Arrow
The Bumble Ball Gallery
http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Lofts/1440/
I amOnlyMe
And I say, "I'm so hungry my stomach's eating a hole through my shirt."
**I amOnlyMe - is that you? *
Diana
> I'm in search of regional sayings such as "It's windier than a bag of
> whistling lips", "I'm hornier than a two peckered billygoat", "I've got
> to piss so bad my teeth are floating" and others of that ilk. If you
> know of any or a site where I might find some, please send as many my
> way as you know of.
>
> thank you
I don't know if this qualifies......my grandmother used to say, "Beauty is
only skin deep, but ugly goes clear to the bone."
Bill Reynolds
the eye".
Bill Reynolds
"they call her door-knob, cause everyone has had a turn on her".
"They call me banjo 'cause everyone's picking on me".
Bill Reynolds
"They call me 'Sweet old Bill' and if that's too long they shorten it
to "SOB". (works for Ben, Bob, Bruce, Bryan, etc.)
Mr. Funny Bone International
i think it's from a film called 'Night of the Comet'
and another one i like is from Child's Play 3 (or is it 2?)
"There's nothing like a strangulation to get the circulation going"
Trevor Clarke
>I'm in search of regional sayings such as "It's windier than a bag of
>whistling lips", "I'm hornier than a two peckered billygoat", "I've got
>to piss so bad my teeth are floating" and others of that ilk. If you
>know of any or a site where I might find some, please send as many my
>way as you know of.
>
>thank you
>
>
"About as much use as a one-legged man at an arse (ass) kicking
party."
"As welcome as a fart in a space suit."
In the part of Northern England where I come from, when someone sings
who clearly isn't able to (like Yoko for instance) my mother used to
say "sound like a piece of coke trapped under a door"
Trev
mailto:<tr...@ecl.u-net.com>
Terence Russell
> In the part of Northern England where I come from, when someone sings
> who clearly isn't able to (like Yoko for instance) my mother used to
> say "sound like a piece of coke trapped under a door"
>
> Trev
>
> mailto:<tr...@ecl.u-net.com>
"coke" meaning as in a type of coal, that would screech across the floor
caught between the door and the floor, making a sound like fingernails
across a chalkboard?
Terry
--
Whenever I suspect the human race of developing the
slightest shred of intelligence, I read any latest
poll about any controversial subject and realize
that my fears are unfounded.
Alison Grant
>
> On Thu, 21 Jan 1999 20:48:31 -0800, opulen...@earthlink.net wrote:
>
> >I'm in search of regional sayings such as "It's windier than a bag of
> >whistling lips", "I'm hornier than a two peckered billygoat", "I've got
> >to piss so bad my teeth are floating" and others of that ilk. If you
> >know of any or a site where I might find some, please send as many my
> >way as you know of.
>
> who clearly isn't able to (like Yoko for instance) my mother used to
> say "sound like a piece of coke trapped under a door"
A favourite Scottish one of mine to describe somebody less than
beautiful:
"He/She has a face like a well-skelped arse" (trans. soundly spanked
bottom)
Don't know how specifically regional you want but in the part of
Edinburgh I come from two sayings were "A face as long as Leith Walk"
and "She's been laid more times than Ferry Road" (a main road constantly
being dug up by the Gas board, Water board, Electricity company, Council
roads dept., Cable television etc. etc.) You can probably apply them to
any long or constantly replaced road in your vicinity...
Alison Grant
Karl Beidatsch
"Madam, I may be drunk; but you're ugly, and in the morning I'll be sober."
Trevellian
>
> I can't remember who said it, but it's a great line:
> "Madam, I may be drunk; but you're ugly, and in the morning I'll be sober."
Winston Churchill said it. Can't remember who it was directed at
though......
T.
--
A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
Remove UNDERWEAR to reply
Tom
Tom
Trevellian wrote in message <36AC8E1F...@esoc.esa.de>...
Karl Beidatsch
Trevellian wrote:
> Karl Beidatsch wrote:
> >
> > I can't remember who said it, but it's a great line:
> > "Madam, I may be drunk; but you're ugly, and in the morning I'll be sober."
>
> Winston Churchill said it. Can't remember who it was directed at
> though......
Some snooty cow who told him he was drunk, I guess.
Cheers!
Karl "Get your hands off my kangaroo!" Beidatsch
TomTom
opulen...@earthlink.net wrote:
> I'm in search of regional sayings such as "It's windier than a bag of
> whistling lips", "I'm hornier than a two peckered billygoat", "I've got
> to piss so bad my teeth are floating" and others of that ilk. If you
> know of any or a site where I might find some, please send as many my
> way as you know of.
>
> thank you
Here are some for ya, most of them from a guy at work I'll call
Wayne....
Hotter than a 9-balled Tom-cat
Jumping around like a Cat on a hot tin roof
More nervous than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs
Hotter than 40 yards of hell
Colder than a witch's titty in a brass bra
Cold enough to freeze the balls on the brass monkey, this one deserves
some explanation. It comes form early ship days when they used
cannons. The cannonballs were kept on a device called the monkey, and
they made it of brass so it wouldn't contract at the same rate as the
cannonballs and thus it kept the cannonballs from sticking. Unless it
was cold enough to freeze the balls on the brass monkey :)
Fucked up as Hogan's Goat (Help! What the hell is a hogan's goat?)
Happier than a puppy with 2 peters
Harder than the preacher's dick
Tighter than a nun's cunt
Black as the Ace of Spades
White as a sheet
Green as goose shit
Slick as owl shit
Cute as a button
Drunk as a Skunk
High as a kite
Queer as a 3-dollar bill
Straight as an arrow
Fat as a hog
Fat as a pudding
Bigger than the side of a barn
Gooder than snuff, and not half as dusty
Faster than greased lightning
Major M
(Windy) I saw a bird lay the same egg six times.
(Awful music) Sounds like someone slapping a baby with a cat.
(Promiscuous woman) They'll have to bury her in a 'Y' shaped coffin.
-Blackadder
(Stupid) He moves his lips when he reads stop signs.
John Pappas
John Pappas
chihua...@chihuahuaboy.com
Another good Churchillism. When informed that his fly was open, Churchill
replied, "The baby bird never falls far from the nest."
LOVE
Chihuahuaboy
"If they can't take a joke...Fuck 'em"
-----------== Posted via Deja News, The Discussion Network ==----------
http://www.dejanews.com/ Search, Read, Discuss, or Start Your Own
Loafy
<Alison...@memex.com> wrote:
>Trevor Clarke wrote:
>>
>> On Thu, 21 Jan 1999 20:48:31 -0800, opulen...@earthlink.net wrote:
>>
>> >I'm in search of regional sayings such as "It's windier than a bag of
>> >whistling lips", "I'm hornier than a two peckered billygoat", "I've got
>> >to piss so bad my teeth are floating" and others of that ilk. If you
>> >know of any or a site where I might find some, please send as many my
>> >way as you know of.
>>
How bout some from south Georgia
Hotter that a four barrel motor scooter.
Hotter than a blistered pussy in a pepper patch.
Hotter than two foxes fuckin in a forest fire.
Hotter than two rats fuckin in a wool sock.
Busier than a puppy with two peters.
Eurasmus B. Black
Don Alford
Rosemary
My brother is a walking encyclopedia of weird one liners. One day when I was
hopping mad at him, he turned to me and said, "If you are looking for
sympathy, you can find it in the dictionary between shit and syphillis."
.
Major M
night, she said,"Dead men don't fall out of windows."
Cheng Chen
Rosemary <ada...@spiritone.com> wrote in article
<91744862...@ridge.spiritone.com>...
heekster
From north Georgia:
Slicker than two eels fuckin in a bucket of snot
replace nomospam with my name to respond
Kenny Wilson
In article <36A8031E...@earthlink.net>,
opulen...@earthlink.net says...
>
>I'm in search of regional sayings such as "It's windier than a bag of
>whistling lips", "I'm hornier than a two peckered billygoat", "I've
got
>to piss so bad my teeth are floating" and others of that ilk. If you
>know of any or a site where I might find some, please send as many my
>way as you know of.
>
>thank you
>
>
>
>
>
B.Merkley
<T...@Toms-House.freeserve.co.uk> wrote:
>Lady Asquith
>
> Tom
>Trevellian wrote in message <36AC8E1F...@esoc.esa.de>...
>>Karl Beidatsch wrote:
>>>
>>> I can't remember who said it, but it's a great line:
>>> "Madam, I may be drunk; but you're ugly, and in the morning I'll be
>sober."
>>
>>
>>Winston Churchill said it. Can't remember who it was directed at
>>though......
It was Lady Astor at whom the barb was aimed...
Sir Winston and Lady Astor had a long colourful feud.
One other Famous exchange went something like this.
Lady Astor: "Sir, if you were my husband, I would put poison in your
tea."
Sir Winston: "Madam, If I were your husband...I'd drink it!"
GPD
And if you're looking for love, you'll find it in the dictionary between
lust and labia.
GPD
Hephaestus
your coffee". To this Winston replied "Madam, if you were my wife, I'd
drink it!"
tim
Tom <T...@Toms-House.freeserve.co.uk> wrote in article
<78l4b1$rur$1...@news4.svr.pol.co.uk>...
> Lady Asquith
>
> Tom
> Trevellian wrote in message <36AC8E1F...@esoc.esa.de>...
> >Karl Beidatsch wrote:
> >>
> >> I can't remember who said it, but it's a great line:
> >> "Madam, I may be drunk; but you're ugly, and in the morning I'll be
> sober."
> >
> >
> >Winston Churchill said it. Can't remember who it was directed at
> >though......
> >
Major M
it up. Cleanliness is next to cleavage... Godliness is next to goggles.
-Billy McCombe
Best wishes,
Major M
Howard White
Slicker then a minnow's peter....
Rhonda Crawford wrote:
>
> My dad always said, "I'm so hungry my stomach thinks my throat's been cut."
>
> Rhon
>
> "Eurasmus B. Black" wrote:
>
> > opulen...@earthlink.net wrote:
> > >
> > > I'm in search of regional sayings such as "It's windier than a bag of
> > > whistling lips", "I'm hornier than a two peckered billygoat", "I've got
> > > to piss so bad my teeth are floating" and others of that ilk. If you
> > > know of any or a site where I might find some, please send as many my
> > > way as you know of.
> > >
> > > thank you
> >
> > It don't amount to a huckleberry in a honey bear's asshole.
> > (Nat Brown from Cape Cod born abt. 1880)
> >
> > It ain't who you know, it's who you blow.
> > (Cape Cod circa 1950)
--
There's too much blood in my caffeine system.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
Drugs may lead to nowhere, but at least it's the scenic route.
Karl Beidatsch
"There's an old cat saying: Better to live for a day as a tiger than a lifetime
as a worm."
"There's an old human saying: Whoever heard of a worm-skin rug?"
Karl "You never heard of Red Dwarf?" Beidatsch
C. Kasupski
<nomo...@foxinternet.net> wrote:
>>
>> >Trevor Clarke wrote:
>> >>
>> >> On Thu, 21 Jan 1999 20:48:31 -0800, opulen...@earthlink.net wrote:
>> >>
>> >> >I'm in search of regional sayings such as "It's windier than a bag of
>> >> >whistling lips", "I'm hornier than a two peckered billygoat", "I've got
>> >> >to piss so bad my teeth are floating" and others of that ilk. If you
>> >> >know of any or a site where I might find some, please send as many my
>> >> >way as you know of.
>> >>
Colder than a witches tit in a brass bra in the middle of antarctica.
slower than molasses in January.
fuller than a whorehouse on an army base.
Dieter Zasche E1
: On Wed, 27 Jan 1999 21:01:04 -0800, heekster
: <nomo...@foxinternet.net> wrote:
:
:
: Colder than a witches tit in a brass bra in the middle of antarctica.
: slower than molasses in January.
: fuller than a whorehouse on an army base.
faster than a fresh-f*cked fox in a forest fire on the fourth of f*cking July.
--
_ _
(*< FFPX (Fiel Fergnügen, Pleibt's Xund) >*)
_)W) http://www.ipp.mpg.de/~Dieter.Zasche/home.html (W(_
----->/^^--D.Zasche, IPP, Boltzmannstraße 2, D-85748 Garching--^^\<-----
Lazarus
Lower than a snake's belly in a wagon wheel rut.
Colder than an Old widow's titty.
Colder than a well digger's butt in Alaska.
More nervous than a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.
Busier than a one legged man in a butt kicking contest.
So cheap he could squeeze two nickels into a dime.
She's so thin if she swallowed an olive 10 guys would leave town.
Tit's so big if she jogged she'd black both her eyes.
What burns my ass? A flame about 3 feet tall.
If brains was gunpower he couldn't blow his nose.
So dumb he couldn't pour piss out of his boot with the directions written on
the heel.
She's so frigid when she opens her legs a light comes on.
He's 200 pounds of dynamite, with a 2" fuse.
The Jolly Green Giant couldn't go to nudist colonies because.....
He kept sticking his business in everybody's nose.
Don Alford
I new a fellow who was so tight that, if you were to put a nickel in his
hand and an acorn up his ass, he'd crack that acorn before you could get
the nickel back.
--
"Searching is half the fun: life is much more manageable when thought
of as a scavenger hunt as opposed to a surprise party."
--Jimmy Buffett
Eurasmus B. Black
watertight.
St Walburg School Libraray
grizzlys dick... ummmm thats all i can think of for now but will keep in
mind for some new ones..
Bil Pletz
Uglier than a mud fence. Busier than a one armed paper hanger. Busier
than a one legged man in as ass kicking contest. Slippier than snot on
a brass doorknob. Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey
(from which came the warning that there is a "brass mondy alert
tonight"). Nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking
chairs. Funnier than a crutch. As much fun as a poke in the eye with a
sharp stick, or as much fun as putting your mouth on the tailpipe of a
bus and being dragged naked down a gravel road. Ad nauseum.
BP
--
Never speaking for anybody, I get into enough trouble speaking for
myself
Roy G. Bragg
If I didn't have bad luck I wouldn't have any luck at all.
Hotter than a fresh f*cked sheep in a cockleburr patch.
Roy
C. Kasupski wrote:
> On Wed, 27 Jan 1999 21:01:04 -0800, heekster
> <nomo...@foxinternet.net> wrote:
>
> >>
> >> >Trevor Clarke wrote:
> >> >>
> >> >> On Thu, 21 Jan 1999 20:48:31 -0800, opulen...@earthlink.net wrote:
> >> >>
> >> >> >I'm in search of regional sayings such as "It's windier than a bag of
> >> >> >whistling lips", "I'm hornier than a two peckered billygoat", "I've got
> >> >> >to piss so bad my teeth are floating" and others of that ilk. If you
> >> >> >know of any or a site where I might find some, please send as many my
> >> >> >way as you know of.
> >> >>
>
Olde Spice
Ed Burdock
>Confuscius say, "Man with hole in pocket feels cocky all day."
>
Confuse-us say, "Woman who ride bicycle upside-down have crackup."
E.B.
Peter Grooby
says...
> On 24 Jan 1999 18:17:03 GMT, iamo...@aol.com wrote:
> >>My dad always said, "I'm so hungry my stomach thinks my throat's been cut."
> >
>
> "I'm so hungry I could eat a baby's butt through a park bench!"
>
I'm hungry enough to eat a scabby kid's head.
--
--------------------------------------------------
Email address has been munged to avert spam.
Please remove pants from email address to reply
Major M
Bullybully
if it dosen't fit use a bigger hammer - if it breaks it needed fixing anyway
Scott Lee Linfoot
with smile on face
Scott Linfoot
S.L.L...@rdg.ac.uk
---------------------
School of Computer Science, Cybernetics and Electronic Engineering,
Engineering Building,
University of Reading,
Whiteknights,
Reading,
Berkshire,
U.K.
RG6 6AY
William Smith
>I'm in search of regional sayings such as "It's windier than a bag of
>whistling lips", "I'm hornier than a two peckered billygoat", "I've got
>to piss so bad my teeth are floating" and others of that ilk. If you
>know of any or a site where I might find some, please send as many my
>way as you know of.
>
>thank you
Too busy to get out of his own way.
Up shit creek without a paddle.
Dumber than a bag of hammers.
Two pickles short of a jar.
Hornier than a herd of three headed rhino.
Useless as tits on a board.
SCOTT72861
Terry Maguire
Some Irish ones:
"As sick as a small hospital"
"She had a head like a bag of chisels"
Regards
Terry
Terry Maguire
William,
William Smith
>I think it's supposed to be " as useless as tits on a boar hog"
No, I remember it well as it was used to describe me!
The previous one is one I made up to describe me as well.
junk...@aol.com
Winston Churchill to a woman who was sitting next to him and accused him of being drunk at the dinner party they were attending.
Contused
>"...in the morning I'll be sober but you'll still be sober",
>Winston Churchill to a woman who was sitting next to him and accused him of being drunk at the dinner party they were attending.
Bessie Braddock): 'My dear, you are ugly, but tomorrow I shall be
sober, and you will still be ugly.
Contused
ำฟา