confucius say (was re

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tony tortorelli

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Oct 21, 1991, 5:38:48 PM10/21/91
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To: All

>Confucius say:
>Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.


Confucius say:
Man with hands in pockets feel foolish,
Man with hole in pocket feel nuts.

Tony
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Faiq Ghatala

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Oct 23, 1991, 4:08:09 PM10/23/91
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In article <199121.1480.3281@execnet> "tony tortorelli" <tony.to...@execnet.com> writes:
>To: All
>
>>Confucius say:
>>Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.
>
>
> Confucius say:
> Man with hands in pockets feel foolish,
> Man with hole in pocket feel nuts.
>
>Tony


Has anyone started a list of Confucius sayings? If they have
can they post it on the net.


Thanks.

Michael J. Knight

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Oct 24, 1991, 1:27:00 AM10/24/91
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I don't know the 10 you have, but I know these two:
Confucious say boy with hole in pocket, feel cocky all day.

Confucious say man who argue with wife all day get no peace at night.

I am not certain how I should have spelled 'peace' in the second one.

go...@ccu.umanitoba.ca

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Oct 23, 1991, 11:53:27 PM10/23/91
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In article <1991Oct23....@ready.eng.ready.com> fa...@ready.eng.ready.com (Faiq Ghatala) writes:
> Has anyone started a list of Confucius sayings? If they have
> can they post it on the net.
>
yes but i still have less than 10 sayings
--

sameer goyal
go...@ccu.umanitoba.ca

Robert Hyatt

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Oct 24, 1991, 9:51:09 AM10/24/91
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1. confucious says man who lay woman on ground have peace (piece) on earth.

2. comfucious says man who sneezes without hanky takes matters into his own hands..

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!Robert Hyatt Computer and Information Sciences !
!hy...@cis.uab.edu University of Alabama at Birmingham !

Podury Satyanarayan

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Oct 24, 1991, 1:39:26 PM10/24/91
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In article <23...@mentor.cc.purdue.edu> knig...@sage.cc.purdue.edu (Michael J. Knight) writes:
>
>Confucious say boy with hole in pocket, feel cocky all day.
>
>Confucious say man who argue with wife all day get no peace at night.
>
How about:

Confucius say man who argue with wife all day get no pi*s at night,
but man argue with wife all night, get shit all day


--
Might is Right!

e-mail: u36...@u2.ncsa.uiuc.edu
Statuatory disclaimer: All opinions expressed herein are solely mine.

Andrew L. Roberts

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Oct 25, 1991, 12:01:17 PM10/25/91
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> Has anyone started a list of Confucius sayings? If they have
> can they post it on the net.

Here's a few I've collected:

Confucius say:

Woman who cooks beans and peas in same pot very unsanitary.
Man who fart in church sit in own pew.
Stand on toilet, get high on pot.
Baseball very funny game--man with 4 balls no can walk!!
Woman who dance while wearing jock strap have make believe ballroom.
Man who fly plane upside down have crackup.


Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

Woman who ride bicycle in city pedal ass all over town.
Secretary not permanent, till screwed on desk.
A girl's best asset is her 'lie'ability.
Support bacteria -- it's the only culture some people have!
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
Man who eat jellybean fart in technicolor.
Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake with smelly finger.
Baby conceived on back seat of car with automatic transmission
grow up to be shiftless bastard.
Man who lay girl on hill not on level.
Boy who go to bed with sex problem wake up with solution in hand.
Kotex not best thing on earth, but next to best thing.
Man who marries a girl with no bust has right to feel low down.
Man with atletic finger make broad jump.
Squirrel who runs up woman's leg not find nuts.
He who fishes in another man's well often catches crab.
Man who speaks with forked tongue should not kiss baloons.
"Man who lose key to apartment not get new key.
He who sitteth on an upturned tack shall surely rise.
Even the greatest of whales is helpless in middle of desert.
The hand that turneth the knob, opens the door.
Boy with hole in pocket, feel cocky all day.
Man who argue with wife all day get no peace at night.
Man who lay woman on ground have peace (piece) on earth.
Man who sneezes without hanky takes matters into his own hands..
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
Man who is jacking into a peanut butter jar is fucking nuts.
Wash your face in the morning, neck at night.
Man who stand on toilet get high on pot!
Man who fly upside-down have crack up!
He who eats to many prunes, sits on toilet many moons.

+-----------------------+---------------------------------------------+
| Andrew L. Roberts |"I don't pretend to understand the universe, |
+-----------------------+ it's much bigger than I am." --Einstein, I |
| robe...@unix2.tcd.ie | think, correct me if I'm wrong. |
+-----------------------+---------------------------------------------+

Andy Soravilla

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Oct 25, 1991, 11:13:01 AM10/25/91
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Fat Fong say "Woman who fly plane upside down, have crack up!"

Daniel L Joines

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Oct 25, 1991, 5:10:54 PM10/25/91
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hi
Here is all the Confucian saying that have been posted over the last few days
If anyone else has others they want added to the list either send mail
or post them and I will repost them later.

enjoy...

Confucious Say:
Man who walk through airport door sideways is going to Bangkok.

America Good Place to Put Chinese Restuarant.

Man who drop watch in toilet bound to have shitty time.

Woman who cooks beans and peas in same pot very unsanitary.

Man who fart in church sit in own pew.

Stand on toilet, get high on pot.

Baseball very funny game--man with 4 balls no can walk!!

Woman who dance while wearing jock strap have make believe ballroom.

Man who fly plane upside down have crackup.

when lady say no, she mean maybe
when lady say maybe, she mean yes
when lady say yes, she no lady

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

Woman who ride bicycle in city pedal ass all over town.

A girl's best asset is her 'lie'ability.

Man who run behind car get exhausted.

Man who eat jellybean fart in technicolor.

Man who go to bed with itchy butt
wake with smelly finger.

Baby conceived on back seat of car with automatic transmission
grow up to be shiftless bastard.

Man who lay girl on hill not on level.

Boy who go to bed with sex problem wake up with solution in hand.

Kotex not best thing on earth, but next to best thing.

Man who marries a girl with no bust has right to fell low down.

Man with atletic finger make broad jump.

Squirrel who runs up woman's leg not find nuts.

He who fishes in another man's well often catches crab.

Man who go to bed with sex on mind
Wakes with solution in hand.

He who fishes in another man's well often catches crab.

He who rapes a man's daughter, draws and quarters his
son, and buries his wife alive in an anthill should not expect to sit
at that man's dinner table without the subject coming up.

He who outruns the cheetah is fucking fast on his feet!

There is no such thing as rape; Woman run faster with skirt
up, than Man with pants down.

man who take lady on camping trip have one intent.

man who put head on railroad track
get splitting headache

He who pull out to fast leave rubber behind.

He who refuses to listen is lying.

He who stands in corner with hands in pocket
doesn't feel crazy, feels nuts.

Dan Wright

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Oct 25, 1991, 3:10:20 PM10/25/91
to
"tony tortorelli" <tony.to...@execnet.com> writes:
>
> >Confucius say:
> >Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.
>
>
> Confucius say:
> Man with hands in pockets feel foolish,
> Man with hole in pocket feel nuts.
>

Confucius say: Man who go to bed with itchy bum
wake up with stinky finger.

(I thought this was really funny when I was 9 years old)

Dan Wright | ..!{hpda, sun, uplherc}!unislc!dw
Salt Lake City, Utah |
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
"His grin was coated with carbon
from years of taking out spark plugs with his teeth"
-- description of a garage mechanic in _One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest_
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Daniel L Joines

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Oct 25, 1991, 6:55:53 PM10/25/91
to
hi
Here is all the Confucian saying that have been posted over the last few days
If anyone else has others they want added to the list either send mail
or post them and I will repost them later.

enjoy...

Confucious Say:
Man who walk through airport door sideways is going to Bangkok.

America Good Place to Put Chinese Restuarant.

Man who drop watch in toilet bound to have shitty time.

Woman who cooks beans and peas in same pot very unsanitary.

Man who fart in church sit in own pew.

Stand on toilet, get high on pot.

Baseball very funny game--man with 4 balls no can walk!!

Woman who dance while wearing jock strap have make believe ballroom.

Man who fly plane upside down have crackup.

when lady say no, she mean maybe
when lady say maybe, she mean yes
when lady say yes, she no lady

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

Woman who ride bicycle in city pedal ass all over town.

======================================-------=================================
Daniel Joines +++++ Well you can't
e-mail: joi...@brahms.udel.edu +++ expect all the
+ jokes to be funny :)

Tom Wood

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Oct 29, 1991, 1:48:40 PM10/29/91
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This might be offensive, especially to the feminine gendered in our illustrious audience, but...

Confucius say, "Rape is impossible. Lady run much faster with dress up than man with pants down!"

Wood

#include <standard/stinkin'/disclaimer>

Gordon Hunn

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Oct 29, 1991, 11:27:49 AM10/29/91
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Confucius say :

Woman who not practise sex before marriage is sentenced to an
indeterminate length.

TWA...@psuvm.psu.edu

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Oct 31, 1991, 12:23:09 AM10/31/91
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How about Confucius say "man with hands in pockets, feel cocky."

Ross Harpestad

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Oct 31, 1991, 12:14:03 PM10/31/91
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Confucius say, "Lady who live in glass house, dress in basement!"

Confusius say, "Small fly on top of big toilet, high on pot!"

Well, I thought they were pretty good...

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