Wet Weapons
Tim Bruening
also heard of a sea creature called a Man Of War, and sea birds called
frigates.
nemo
"Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:482E7F6D...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> Aquatic weapons: Submachine guns, fish tanks, and electric eels. I've
> also heard of a sea creature called a Man Of War, and sea birds called
> frigates.
Poor Two Geese Man O' War. It's a felly jish!
And there's the Bombardier Beetle - and if you can't afford one of those,
the Bombarcheap Beetle
You think I'm Joe King?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bombardier_beetle
Tim Bruening
Commission: A church run by computers.
Decommission: A commission of demons.
Supervision: Eyesight of Clark Kent.
Super: Price per unit of soup.
Tim Bruening
D. Liver: Demon body organ used as a filter.
Diploma: A negotiating Mom.
Diplomat: Floor covering at the embassy.
Embassy: Ocean of diplomats.
Tim Bruening
mike wheeELer wrote:
> In article <XrUSb.33120$pD4....@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk>,
> ne...@naughtylass2.wet, nemo was looking at the world oddly when:
> >
> >
> >Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> >news:401B735C...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >> Complain: A computer the size of the Great Plains.
> >>
> >> Comrade: Radioactive computer.
> >>
> >> Compact: A very small, dense computer.
> >>
> >> Compost: A decaying computer.
> >>
> >> D. Cay: Demon on an island.
> >>
> >> Hammer: A pig that packs quite a punch.
> >
> Comrade: the afor mentioned computer had chicken Kiev for lunch.
Rabies: Radioactive buzzing insects that make radioactive honey.
Tim Bruening
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4109C895...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
> >
> > > Parapet: Supernatural dog or cat.
> >
> > Paralize: Supernatural fibs.
>
> Parabolas: Supernatural Mexican hunting device that tangles the legs
of the
> prey.
>
> Parador: Supernatural entrance, e.g., what the Ancient Egyptians had
so that
> the spirits of their ancestors could visit them. About 80% Alc/Vol, I
think
> they were.
>
> Paracrine: A paratrooper sobbing because he's landed on his nuts and
messed
> up his hormoans.
>
> Paradise: Heaven for Craps players.
Paralegals: Supernatural lawyers.
Bloomerangs: Flowers that keep coming back.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4109C271...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > Embarrassing: Red faced singer.
> >
> > Embossing: Song of a potter.
> >
> > Embracing: Hugging song.
> >
> > Expressing: Song of a failed newspaper.
> >
> > Flossing: Dentist song.
> >
> > Grossings: 144 songs.
> >
> > Harassing: Song that bugs people.
> >
> > Harnessing: Song of draft animals.
> >
> > Hissing: Snake song.
> >
> > History: Conservative British snake
>
> . . . or goose.
>
> His/Herstory: Politically correct record of past events.
Exploratory: British Conservative in space.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4109C8C0...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
> > news:<c83kav$o1b$6...@news.wplus.net>...
> > > Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:40A1D46E...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > > Protesting: A rebel bell yelling a rebel yell.
> > > >
> > > Or a prostitute in the service department of an electronics
company.
> >
> > What's her capacity for electric sex?
>
> Ask here:
>
> http://www.kittenstoyroom.com/xcart/catalog/Sex_Machines-p-1-c-29.html
>
> Looks like they need plugging into an xcart socket!
Xcart: Alien vehicle.
Tim Bruening
news:<2i1hjtF...@uni-berlin.de>...
> "Milton J. Smuthworthy, I" <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote in
> message news:40bb7d73$0$46845$45be...@newscene.com
>
> > It is our Way.
>
> Now all we need is some Kurds.
That never O-Kurd to me!
Carbo: Decoration for an automobile.
Tim Bruening
Hauke Reddmann <fc3...@uni-hamburg.de> wrote in message
news:<c9mokp$it8$1...@rzsun03.rrz.uni-hamburg.de>...
> I program everything in FORTRAN, but it still sucks.
> One index out of range at runtime, and the whole
> variable space allocation is screwed.
> That error is called "Tragedy of the COMMONs".
Fortran: In favor of sexually ambigous people.
Programming: Chinese vase that makes TV shows.
Programmer: Ocean that makes TV shows.
Tim Bruening
"KIMEVANS" <kime...@bigpond.com> wrote in message
news:<BnGvc.4115$rz4....@news-server.bigpond.net.au>...
> "Hauke Reddmann" <fc3...@uni-hamburg.de> wrote in message
> news:c9mokp$it8$1...@rzsun03.rrz.uni-hamburg.de...
> > I program everything in FORTRAN, but it still sucks.
> > One index out of range at runtime, and the whole
> > variable space allocation is screwed.
> > That error is called "Tragedy of the COMMONs".
> >
>
Which makes Internet cookies?
Tim Bruening
"Chris Trask" <chris...@earthlink.net> wrote in message
news:<UBNvc.659$uX2...@newsread2.news.pas.earthlink.net>...
> "J. A. Mc." <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote in message
> news:jp2vb059p8n1bhklk...@4ax.com...
> > The Ringmaster of the travelling circus was aghast when the Human
> Cannonball
> > suddenly quit. "How will I ever find another man of his caliber?"
> >
>
> He would have to advertise in a bullet-in.
Another Human Cannonball was fired today. He really bombed during his
performance.
Performer: Ocean of actors, clowns, musicians, etc.
Performing: Chinese vase of actors, clowns, musicians, etc.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> unidyne <uni...@cox.net> wrote in message
> news:H1WMc.2294$zA4.338@lakeread04...
> >
> > "brigit bardot brigade" <brigit...@hotmail.com> wrote in message
> > news:3cd79f7a.04072...@posting.google.com...
> > > longest day... i recall some critics called it the longest movie.
> >
> > These were actually used in film reviews:
> >
> > Lost Horison : "Lost Investment"
> > Howard the Duck: "Howard the Dead Duck"
> > Heaven's Gate: "Heaven Knows Why"
> > Dawn of the Dead: "Yawn of the Living"
> > Don't Stop the Music : "PLEASE Stop the Music!"
> > Xanadu: "Xana-don't"
> > Waterworld: "Wat-ever For?"
> > The Postman: "Return to Sender"
> >
> > ...and my personal favorite...
> >
> > The Sound of Music: "The Sound of Mucus"
> >
> I'll second that! I used to repair the telephones in the Palace
Theatre when
> that horrible show was on. Trying to repair the blasted switchboard
with big
> fat cows dressed as nuns bellowing scales in your ear!!
Fish scales or weighing scales?
Tim Bruening
"J. A. Mc." wrote:
> On 30 Dec 2003 12:05:26 GMT, Hauke Reddmann <fc3...@uni-hamburg.de>
found
> these unused words floating about:
>
> >Hauke Reddmann <:-EX8 fc3...@uni-hamburg.de
> >als man ankam wollte man werden, die geschichte schreiben,
> >die doofen sollen sterben, der plan als man damals nach hamburg kam
> >(Kettcar)
>
> when one arrived wanted one to become, which write history, which
stupid are
> to die, which flat as one came at that time to Hamburg
>
> Piper view ???
Hamburg: Frozen pig.
Hamilton: Heavy pig.
Tim Bruening
"J. A. Mc." wrote:
> On Tue, 30 Dec 2003 03:06:18 GMT, "Chris Trask"
<chris...@earthlink.net>
> found these unused words floating about:
>
> >"Milton J. Smuthworthy, I" <tonw...@lycos.co.uk> wrote:
> >
> >>
> >> At first I didn't understand. But then my oneness with the universe
> >> started building. And building. And building! But now that I can
> >> empathize with rocks, I find they are kind of jaded. Granite, they
are
> >> bolder than dirt, but nothing marbellous.
> >>
> > Many years ago, being despondent with a mundane mechanical
existence, I
> >decided to enter a Catholic monastery. After months of intensive
study, I
> >felt I had made no progress in bringing my life together so I
departed. I
> >later entered a Buddist monastery, where I shortly attained true
> >enlightenment. Now, I am a whole friar.
> >
> The Colonel gave you Wings?
No, he drank Red Bull.
Tim Bruening
"J. A. Mc." wrote:
> On Tue, 30 Dec 2003 14:44:53 -0500, "Harry Farkas"
<hfa...@wowway.com>
> found these unused words floating about:
>
> >Bar Code: How canines communicate
> Bar Cose: Song of the Hounds.
What is a Cose?
Bar Code: How prisoners communicate.
Bar Code: How alcoholics communicate.
Bar Code: How lawyers communicate.
Tim Bruening
Sheila Dundee wrote:
> J. A. Mc. wrote:
> > On 1 Aug 2004 11:16:07 -0700, art...@yahoo.com (artyw) found these
> > unused
> > words floating about:
> >
> >> Harry Marmoset <harry_m...@msn.com> wrote in message
> >> news:<Xns953865E3D721Ah...@209.25.157.130>...
> >>> What do you call a sexually immoral mushroom?
> >>>
> >>> A spore
> >>
> >> They maybe im-morel, but they're fun guys to be around.
> >
> > Just so long as they don't shed their caps ...
>
> Do they tip their caps at gills as they com-post?
Jinto: Drunken foot digit.
Outsourcing: Song of displaced American workers.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:3FAB4D72...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:3FA7076C...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > Proper: Price per unit of equipment needed for plays.
> > > >
> > > Properties: What the actors drink after the show, instead of the
> imitation
> > > stuff the pretend to drink on stage.
> >
> > Realties: True teas drunk by dealers in homes and the land under
said
> homes.
> >
> Casualties: Drunk while wearing informal clothes.
> Charities: Teas brought by a Char Lady.
> Empties: Teas with electromagnetic and magnetic screening to comply
with EEC
> regs.
> Novelties: Teas drunk while reading a good book.
> Pities: 3.141592654 of cups.
Faulties: Teas drunk by parachute jumpers.
Jumper: Price per jump.
Tim Bruening
Tim Bruening
"Milton J. Smuthworthy, I" wrote:
> Then Larry Krzewinski said:
> >
> >>Then "nemo" said:
> >>>J. A. Mc. <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote in message
> >>>> On Fri, 30 Jul 2004 12:02:24 GMT, "fedup" <fe...@mizz.con> found
these
> >>>>>Christmas box: A thick ear on the 24th for lighting the fire just
before
> >>>>>Santa came down the chimney.
> >>>>>The poor sole ended up with four rosy cheeks!
> >>>> Cheeks on the bottom of shoes? I can't cobbler to that one!
> >>>A cheeky reply.
> >>>I know it's the last thing you'd thin cough, butt cobblers is
bollocks in
> >>>the UK. The rest fits in well with booty - which is little shoes
for babies
> >>>in the UK.
> >>>Two peoplses separated by an uncommon slang langwidge as well.
> >>But thanks to you and other literary UK posters, we can overcome our
> >>American slang and learn proper English. Others will say, "hook
hairs!"
> >>Well, ice up hose! (brrrrrr)!
> >
> >You mean we'll all have to become depundant on UK humor to learn to
> >speak properly?
>
> I don't think Nemo is depundable.
Y Knot?
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:410B5DAE...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:40F78F16...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > nemo wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > > > news:40F4BEC3...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > > > Betsy: An ocean casino.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Casey: Suitcase ocean.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Daisy: Flower ocean.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Dicey: Die, ocean!
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Krypton: Heavy secret.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Pepsi: A fizzy, uplifting sea.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Peptide: The result of the moon pulling on the Pepsi.
> > > > >
> > > > > Polypeptide: The result of the moon pulling on a parrot.
> > > > >
> > > > > Polypeptide Chain: What it pulls the parrot with.
> > > > >
> > > > > A Nemo Acid.
> > > >
> > > > Carbon Chain: Chain of pastries in an automobile.
> > > >
> > > > Swimming Suit: Lawyer in water.
> > > >
> > > Carbon globules: Buckyballs. What the secretary was looking
forward to
> in
> > > Doctor Strangelove.
> >
> > Carbon Dating: To go out with charcoal or diamonds.
>
> And if a violently jealous German count catches you - there'll be a
> Graphite!
He sure has Buckyballs!
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Harry Farkas <hfa...@wowway.com> wrote in message
> news:9bWdneuhhKK...@wideopenwest.com...
> >
> > "fedup" <fe...@mizz.con> wrote in message
> > news:SjwOc.8025$a8....@fe2.news.blueyonder.co.uk...
> > >
> > > Jonners <j...@43-xarun.freeserve.co.uk> wrote in message
> > > news:cebgkt$h3s$1...@news5.svr.pol.co.uk...
> > > >
> > > > "Harry Farkas" <hfa...@wowway.com> wrote in message
> > > > news:obWdnUSO6sd...@wideopenwest.com...
> > > > > She: I'm going out to pick up a pair of hose.
> > > > >
> > > > > He: You mean like Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie ?
> > > > >
> > > > > --
> > > > > Harry Farkas
> > > > > ******************
> > > >
> > > > Did you find them in hose hoe?
> > > >
> > > ...or in a nhosepiper?
> > >
> > > :o(
> >
> > Nope, found 'em in the proscenium.
>
> Underneath the Ar-chez with Flanaggan and Allen?
>
> We do Asbestos we can!
Asbestos: Fire resistant foot digits.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Cybe R. Wizard <Cybe_R_Wizard@WizardsTower> wrote in message
> news:20040731113712.22a47a07@WizardsTower...
> > On Sat, 31 Jul 2004 14:12:17 GMT
> > "nemo" <ne...@naughtylust.wet> wrote:
> >
> > >
> > > Cybe R. Wizard <Cybe_R_Wizard@WizardsTower> wrote in message
> > > news:20040731072706.174a6bb5@WizardsTower...
> > > > On 31 Jul 2004 03:43:06 -0500
> > > > "Milton J. Smuthworthy, I" <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com>
> > > > I dunno, sometimes it seems like he's gone off the depunned.
> > > >
> > > Never mined. The other groups where the big bunches of gripes hang
out
> > > will all be depunned soon.
> > >
> > Yes, I can see a brit less crossposting already.
> >
> Fan queue. (Memory permitting - It's old age, I tell you!)
>
> I'm sorting my end out. Now please have the tim-erity to sort out
yours!
> Imodium's very good. :o)
>
> Imodeon: Cinema with plastic covers on the seats for people with their
> rrheas in a dia condition!
Cinema: Movie mother.
Drama: Mother of a play.
Tim Bruening
A: Topical fish and Angle fish?
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4109C78B...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > Extremist: Radical fog.
> >
> > Optimist: Happy fog.
> >
> > Pessimist: Sad fog.
>
> Extremist: Fog that used to be in the forest.
>
> Bigamist: More fog.
>
> Digamist: Fog surrounding a pneumatic drill.
>
> Gothamist: Batman got lost in it!
Alarmist: Paranoid fog.
Conformist: Fog that obeys authority.
Deformist: Fog that causes mutations.
Reformist: A liberal fog.
Tim Bruening
mike wheeELer wrote:
> In article <XrUSb.33120$pD4....@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk>,
> ne...@naughtylass2.wet, nemo was looking at the world oddly when:
> >
> >
> >Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message