THE Best Bumper Stickers EVER
THoey
in the rear window of a BMW, written in fancy script that you would expect
to see Stanford or some high class school name written:
"Your College Sucks!!!"
--
THoey
ll...@panix.com
In the same place:
Fiasco College
William J. Evans
: Fiasco College
Ferengi School of Business
-- Captain Nitpick
Bill Evans P.O. Box 4829 Irvine, CA 92716 (714)551-2766 _ /| ACK!
Email-To: w...@acm.org -- PGP encrypted mail preferred. -- \`o_O' /
Finger w...@netcom.com for public key. Key #: 441AFEA5 =( )=
PGPprint: FB D0 1C 1D EF DC 26 BA B3 9E 84 0B 40 D6 59 9C U
William J. Evans
administration (Nixon had to fire several levels down the
line before he could get to firing Special Prosecutor Archibald
Cox):
IMPEACH THE COX SACKER
Niki L. Flumerfelt
Hug a logger, You'll never go back to trees!
SOS - Save Our Squirrles (this one is dealing with the never spotted in
the woods spotted owls)
WARNING - I Don't brake for tree huggers
and my favorite ones:
HAVE YOU FED YOUR HUSKY TODAY?
I like both kinds of music: COUNTRY and WESTERN
Niki Flumerfelt
Age 19
Squamish, BC
Jason Ulrich
troy trimble
> Welcome to Maine...now git!
Sounds like it should be for Texas, not Maine.
Here's a few I saw in a store last night:
Out of my mind, back in 5 minutes
I'm not single, just romantically challenged
Larry Kubicz
Horn broken. Watch for finger...
Larry K
Paul Lussier {83553}
My favorite is:
If Clinton is the answer...
It must have been a REALLY stupid question!!
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
- Paul Lussier = It is a good day =The next best thing to doing -
= Raytheon ESD SEL - to put slinkies -something smart is not doing =
- p...@swl.msd.ray.com = on escalators = something stupid. -
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
= Quote of the week: =
- Real programmers don't document. If it was hard to write, -
= it should be hard to understand. =
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
ALI...@maine.maine.edu
Gilbert Johnson
Trouble Parking?
Support Planned Parenthood!
Gil
Bennet Johnston
Windows 95=Mac 89
hehehehehe
***Message sent from Mactropolis BBS, Christchurch, New Zealand***
JAVIER SOTOMAYOR
>>> Hmmm.... Hadnt thouhgt of that. But your pointing it out has
inspired
>a new bumper sticker for my car -
>"Pro-Choice & Will Shoot Back !!!" <<
>Don't you mean "Pro-choice so I can stab my own children in the back?"
:)
>
The anonymous person who wrote the last bumper sticker name should come
forward and state his/her name, 'cause it's
GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Go ahead..PRO-CHOICERS, keep your legal right to kill your unborn
children. The law won't hunt you, but your concience will!
Bill Purmort
In Article<hfriedla.2...@medic.up.ac.za>, <hfri...@medic.up.ac.za>
write:
> Path:
brutus.bright.net!chi-news.cic.net!usc!howland.reston.ans.net!quagga.ru.ac.za!u
cthpx!wabe.csir.co.za!inet.up.ac.za!medic.up.ac.za!hfriedla
> From: hfri...@medic.up.ac.za
> Newsgroups: alt.tasteless.jokes,rec.humor
> Subject: Re: THE Best Bumper Stickers EVER
> Date: Tue, 12 Dec 1995 13:05:49
> Organization: University of Pretoria
> Lines: 4
> Message-ID: <hfriedla.2...@medic.up.ac.za>
> References: <49bj8k$7...@ralph.vnet.net> <49de6t$t...@newsbf02.news.aol.com>
<95332.113...@MAINE.MAINE.EDU> <49vg6s$n...@rodelo.cyberverse.com>
<mes-081295...@sam-ppp-g4.neosoft.com> <4ade4o$3...@soap.news.pipex.net>
> NNTP-Posting-Host: 137.215.117.107
> Xref: brutus.bright.net alt.tasteless.jokes:88733 rec.humor:223417
>
> If you do not like the way I drive,
> just wait until you see me putt.
>
> If you can read this sticker then I have lost my caravan.
Nuke Gay Whales for Jesus kind of a catch all one...
name goes here
Ron Hulen
Wh> Rian Rutherford (gar...@teleport.com) wrote:
Wh> : tbeckett (tbec...@jazzmin.vnet.net) wrote:
Wh> : : Nuck Fewt
Wh> : Lobotomies For Republicans: It's the Law
Wh> The Democrats already have theirs ;)
Thanks for reminding me, I almost forgot about Phil Gramm.
<-- Ron K. Hulen -- PGP Key # 200E4F39 -<<
<-- Send replies and all that stuff to: rhu...@stingray.net -<<
...
* Origin: Beyond Tomorrow - Moberly, MO - (816) 263-0980 (1:2805/2)
Brian D. Catlin
were:
>>>The anonymous person who wrote the last bumper sticker name should come
>>>forward and state his/her name, 'cause it's
>>>GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>>!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>>!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>>Go ahead..PRO-CHOICERS, keep your legal right to kill your unborn
>>>children. The law won't hunt you, but your concience will!
Don't count on it. Some have no consciences. In some places the
law will hunt ya still too. So run little sheba run!
==========================================
| Thou mayst obtain mine attention at: |
| home: bria...@a.crl.com |
| work: cat...@penril.com |
| My webserver: http://www.penril.com |
==========================================
John Schaefer
Sykophrog
>I like this one.
>Windows 95=Mac 89
Windows 95 = Mac 89 = Amiga 85
---
"What do you think sirs?"
Paul Contursi
>i think democrats are nearly as bad as republicans...sure, the old repub's
were
>near-fascists, but the newer ones are anti-gov't, pro- individual, etc...
I don't get it.
Brian D. Catlin
>>> Seen in Appleton Wi. " my kid can kick the shit out of your honor role kid"
Ha, fooled you! ain't gots no honor role kid!
Legion
Coolness Incarnate <cool...@crh0517.urh.uiuc.edu> wrote:
>Two LIFE IN HELL quotes come to mind:
>
>"Does voting Republican make you an accomplice to their crimes?" -- Bongo
>
>"And always to rember to be a caring Republican. Step OVER the homeless,
>not on them." -- The Streetsmart Republican
That last one looks more like a Ted Rall quote. Are you sure that's Groening?
-Legion
--
"I'm not the sun...I can't keep dying every night just to come back
each morning!" -- Yuta, _Mermaid Forest_, Rumiko Takahashi
Lyz Filteau
Greek God
student at <blah> high school"....
i saw one today that said, "My kid isn't an honor student, but he can
kick the shit out of your kid"....
--
* pluto <pl...@gti.net> a.k.a. ozzie *
* e-mail me for my pgp key *
* http://www.gti.net/pluto *
* "Hackin', Crackin, Slackin'.... does life get any better?" *
Gerry Corn
: >"And always to rember to be a caring Republican. Step OVER the homeless,
: That last one looks more like a Ted Rall quote. Are you sure that's Groening?
Yep, it is. I cut out that entire comic and have it taped to my
wall...it's DEFINITELY Groening...
--Jake
--
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
|"Forget it Jake, it's Chinatown..."| cor...@clark.edu | gc...@pacifier.com|
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Gerry Corn
: Go ahead..PRO-CHOICERS, keep your legal right to kill your unborn
: children. The law won't hunt you, but your concience will!
If you want to debate about Pro-choice/Pro-Life, please do so in the
appropriate newsgroup. This is a HUMOR newsgroup, not an abortion debate
newsgroup.
And, just so that I sound like a hipocrite, if you were to see an unborn
child at the stage of development that legal abortions are performed at,
you wouldn't be able to even tell it was human (chicken, monkey, etc.
fetuses all look VERY much alike at that stage...)
ALSO, if you are so eager to keep people from having abortions, then YOU
take the children that are born into homes who, because they resent
having the child, beat him/her daily. OR homes where the extra mouth to
feed drags the entire family down into drug-dealing/prostitution/crime.
Steve Howard
>
>How about: I may be fat, but you're ugly and I can lose weight!
>
On a small foreign car being driven by a very attractive young woman:
Horn Broke - Watch for Finger
con...@engn.uwindsor.ca
And this was all on a bumoer sticker?
William J. Evans
Carl Schelin
>
>you know how you see those ones that say, "I'm a proud parent of an honor
>student at <blah> high school"....
>
>i saw one today that said, "My kid isn't an honor student, but he can
>kick the shit out of your kid"....
>
Way back when Pat Robertson was running for president I created a bumper
sticker for my Fiero:
Pat Robertson
For Martyr
I've seen:
If girls are made with sugar and spice
How come they smell like fish
Carl Schelin "Optional, Desperate, Feral, and Single"
Hobgoblin Software - George Gilder
Hobg...@interramp.com "Yep, Nope, Perhaps, and Finally" - Me
Barry Beaumont
>>>You might hit a bump & spill your drink.
>>
>>How about:
>>
>>Don't drink and drive.
>>Drink, THEN drive.
>
> And there is always -
> Don't drink and drive home
> Take drugs and fly home.
Remember...Alcohol and Gunpowder Don't Mix!
It Won't Shoot and It Tastes Awful!
Barry B
David Coons
>A personal favorite of mine would have to be:
> Windows 95 = Macintosh 89
Or
Macintosh 89 = Xerox 77
Wally Zwicker
"USE CAUTION: 90% of people are made by mistake".
From: mairena <mai...@imaginet.fr>
Don't drink and drive, smoke and fly!!
From: l0...@unb.ca
>Don't drink & drive.
>You might hit a bump & spill your drink.
How about:
Don't drink and drive.
Drink, THEN drive.
From: Steve McMillan <smcm...@csfp.csfb.com>
>Don't drink and drive.
>Drink, THEN drive.
And there is always -
Don't drink and drive home
Take drugs and fly home.
From: "Z. Best" <te...@test.site>
Bad Cop! No doughnut!
From: Barry Beaumont <bu...@FreeNet.Carleton.CA>
Remember...Alcohol and Gunpowder Don't Mix!
It Won't Shoot and It Tastes Awful!
From: Bryan Morris <mor...@pegasus.cc.ucf.edu>
If you're going to drink and drive,
stay off the road!
From: TheCharlie <char...@venus.hili.com>
How about:
If you can't drink and drive .. DON'T DO IT!!!!
You're fucking it up for those of us who CAN!
From: Cody Jones <ze...@daknet.com>
At Ft. Stewart Ga, I saw this one:
Would the last American leaving Miami please bring the American Flag?
From: Kelly Fitzpatrick <kmf...@saba.kuentos.guam.net>
Vote Republican. It's Easier Than Thinking.
The Religious Right Is Neither.
From: "M. Eriksen" <7243...@CompuServe.COM>
How about,
Don't drink and drive ..... smoke and fly ...
From: Shal...@sisna.com
nO
Justice
From: David Coons <d.c...@ttu.edu>
>A personal favorite of mine would have to be:
> Windows 95 = Macintosh 89
Or
Macintosh 89 = Xerox 77
From: Jeff Newman <new...@rapidramp.com>
My karma ran over my dogma.
From: MoToRoLa <mto...@primenet.com>
I like on my car:
RITEBYU
Dave Keys
--
Dave Keys - dave...@vms2.macc.wisc.edu
Graduate Student - Genetics Department
University of Wisconsin at Madison
Pat Wright
Help! I've tripped and I can't get down
Timo Salmi
John P. Anderson <j...@deltanet.com> wrote:
:In article <4c1239$p...@wsrcom.wsr.ac.at>, Michael Demelbauer
:<mic...@wsr.ac.at> wrote:
:> If some is looking for a good joke (sucess in this group is getting worse
:Michael, how do you get all this on a bumper sticker?
A stickler to bumpers?
All the best, Timo (aka Professor Pundit in rec.humor)
....................................................................
Prof. Timo Salmi Co-moderator of news:comp.archives.msdos.announce
Moderating at ftp:// & http://garbo.uwasa.fi archives 193.166.120.5
Department of Accounting and Business Finance ; University of Vaasa
t...@uwasa.fi http://uwasa.fi/~ts BBS 961-3170972; FIN-65101, Finland
Dave Fenton
Vote Republican!"
Philip Robinson
: In article <4b0di1$q...@gti.gti.net>, pl...@gti.gti.net says...
: >
: >you know how you see those ones that say, "I'm a proud parent of an honor
: >student at <blah> high school"....
: >
: >i saw one today that said, "My kid isn't an honor student, but he can
: >kick the shit out of your kid"....
I've seen several that say "My kid beat up your honor roll student" :)
: Way back when Pat Robertson was running for president I created a bumper
: sticker for my Fiero:
: Pat Robertson
: For Martyr
: I've seen:
: If girls are made with sugar and spice
: How come they smell like fish
: Carl Schelin "Optional, Desperate, Feral, and Single"
: Hobgoblin Software - George Gilder
: Hobg...@interramp.com "Yep, Nope, Perhaps, and Finally" - Me
CR
met...@global.co.za
>From: Joao Batista <fbat...@cc.fc.ul.pt>
>From: mairena <mai...@imaginet.fr>
>From: l0...@unb.ca
> How about:
>From: "Z. Best" <te...@test.site>
> Bad Cop! No doughnut!
>From: Barry Beaumont <bu...@FreeNet.Carleton.CA>
>From: Bryan Morris <mor...@pegasus.cc.ucf.edu>
>From: TheCharlie <char...@venus.hili.com>
>From: Cody Jones <ze...@daknet.com>
>From: Kelly Fitzpatrick <kmf...@saba.kuentos.guam.net>
>From: "M. Eriksen" <7243...@CompuServe.COM>
>From: Shal...@sisna.com
> nO
> Justice
>From: David Coons <d.c...@ttu.edu>
> Or
>From: Jeff Newman <new...@rapidramp.com>
>From: MoToRoLa <mto...@primenet.com>
> RITEBYU
How about : FUCK THE POOR
Kelly Fitzpatrick
<Pine.A32.3.91.951225...@trumpet.aix.calpoly.edu>:
Distribution:
The Religious Right Is Neither
--
Kelly Fitzpatrick
kmf...@kuentos.guam.net
Most definitely my opinions.
Do you know anybody else
who'd want 'em?
Rodent
>The Religious Right Is Neither
Found at a gun show:
I (heart) Love Cats --
They taste just like chicken!
aeo...@chesco.com
> The last time I checked the bills sponsor was Senator Exon of
>Nebraska and again the last time I checked he was a Democrat. Idiots
>like you should keep your moths shut instead of opening them and
>proving that you are an idiot.
>~############################################################################
>\\/ayne //\ann
What's the fun of being an idiot if you can't prove yourself?
Martha K. Koester
I (spade) my cat.
--
Martha Koester "Some mornings, it just isn't worth
eri...@scn.org chewing through the leather straps."
--Emo Phillips
Bradley Teets
. ...
.... .. .. .... -- .. .. .... ::: '. .. "... :..:.]
If you can read this then you are too close
David Hinerman
: >The Religious Right Is Neither
: Found at a gun show:
: I (heart) Love Cats --
: They taste just like chicken!
or
...especially with barbecue sauce.
--
____________________________________________________________________
My employer didn't pay for this opinion, so they're not responsible.
If you want to discuss it, contact me directly.
dhi...@freenet.columbus.oh.us
Wesley Womack
My personal favorite...
Mark Binns
writes:
>There is an ongoing form of bumper sticker slogan that associate one's
>profession / favorite hobby with sexual virility. Some of these are
>funnier than others and many of the better ones I seem to have
>forgotten. Here's a couple I remember though:
>
>SKIN DIVERS DO IT DEEPER!
>
>RUGBY PLAYERS HAVE LEATHER BALLS
>
>LAWYERS DO IT IN THEIR BRIEFS
ALSO:
WELDERS DO IT IN ALL POSITIONS
IT STAYS UP LONGER WHEN YOU DO IT IN CONCRETE
Gitarzan
>If you can read this then you are too close
Wine Her, Dine Her and 69 Her.
Watzamatta U.
wrote:
>
>. ...
>.... .. .. .... -- .. .. .... ::: '. .. "... :..:.]
>
>
>If you can read this then you are too close
>
William J. Evans
:SKIN DIVERS DO IT DEEPER!
:
:RUGBY PLAYERS HAVE LEATHER BALLS
:
:LAWYERS DO IT IN THEIR BRIEFS
TREE SURGEONS GET INTO MORE CROTCHES
ClockworkDog
Robert Bland
>
> In <30ec8196...@10.0.2.1> Watza...@Netcom.com (Watzamatta U.)
> writes:
>
> >profession / favorite hobby with sexual virility. Some of these are
> >funnier than others and many of the better ones I seem to have
> >forgotten. Here's a couple I remember though:
> >
> >
> >RUGBY PLAYERS HAVE LEATHER BALLS
> >
> >LAWYERS DO IT IN THEIR BRIEFS
>
>
>
> WELDERS DO IT IN ALL POSITIONS
>
> IT STAYS UP LONGER WHEN YOU DO IT IN CONCRETE
TENNIS PLAYERS HAVE FUZZY BALLS
Sanguinarius
Robert Bland
Archmage
Sex Appeal - Please give generously
and
Travelling Sex Shop
--
Archmage (@mageton.demon.co.uk)
** All the opinions and stuff are my own. **
** But you can borrow them if you ask nicely! **
| Those who feel the breath of sadness
| Those who've found their touch for madness
| Those who find themselves ridiculous
| Sit down next to me - James
Arcane
Thanks all you virgins--for nothing!
Arcane
Peter
R & L Stivers
writes:
>There is an ongoing form of bumper sticker slogan that associate one's
>profession / favorite hobby with sexual virility. Some of these are
>funnier than others and many of the better ones I seem to have
>forgotten. Here's a couple I remember though:
>
>SKIN DIVERS DO IT DEEPER!
>
>RUGBY PLAYERS HAVE LEATHER BALLS
>
>LAWYERS DO IT IN THEIR BRIEFS
How about:
PILOTS SLIP IT IN
Other The One
My kid picks locks at YOUNAMEIT high school.
Yakov Horenstein
> One that had my friend and I on the floor for a while:
>
> You can't take it with you...
> but I'll let you hold it for a while.
>
> Jon
The best bumper sticker I saw was:
Jesus May Love You,
But Everyone Else Thinks You're an Asshole
YH
--
Yakov Horenstein Tel/Fax: +39 2 2900 6208
Milano, Italy E-mail: ya...@planet.it
R & L Stivers
Embarrassing Moments:
In the late 60's United Airlines sends letters to the wives of
traveling executives thanking them for accompanying their husbands on
recent flights. Only the companions some of the men had along weren't
their wives.
A few years ago, the "Lord's Airline" is set to become the first
Fundamentalist carrier, with plans for a Miami-Jerusalem nonstop
(complete with in-flight gospel music). It never makes it off the
ground. Amen!!
In 1981, the Alabama State Legislature debates passing a law that
airlines flying over the state's airspace must serve peanuts.
In 1991, an attendant at a Budapest hotel kicks Princess Di out of the
pool, saying it's for training only.
R & L Stivers
OK, we've all about heard the greatest license plates around, but what
about the worst, most obnoxious, stupid, shoot-the-driver or
make-me-wanna-puke plates???
Here's a few that former co-workers sported proudly:
KISYBRD (Kissy Bird, her "pet name" from her boyfriend)
WUVBYTS
EXTRA35 (bloke from England who thought it was funny that
DMV charged him $35 extra for the plates...go
figure)
R & L Stivers
"No beach is too silly for the French." -PJ O'Rourke
"When it's 3-o'clock in New York, it's still 1938 in London." -Bette
Midler
"After seeing Rio, I could forgive God for New Jersey." -American
tourist
"A city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm." -J.F. Kennedy about
Washington, D.C.
"I don't even know what street Canada is on." -Al Capone
"There'll always be an England, even it it's in Hollywood." -Bob Hope
"The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco." -Mark
Twain
"I don't want to live in a city where the only cultural advantage is
that you make a right turn on a red light." -Woody Allen on L.A., in
Annie Hall
"Zaire's got to be great. I've never seen so many Mercedes." -Muhammad
Ali
"Rome is an example of what happens when the buildings in a city last
too long." -Andy Warhol
"Nineteen suburbs in search of a metropolis." -H.L. Mencken on L.A.
"Russia is the only country in the world you can be homesick for while
you're still in it." -John Updike
Timo Salmi
:My kid picks locks at YOUNAMEIT high school.
Ha! Pick of the lock.
All the best, Timo (aka Professor Pundit in rec.humor)
....................................................................
Prof. Timo Salmi Co-moderator of news:comp.archives.msdos.announce
Moderating at ftp:// & http://garbo.uwasa.fi archives 193.166.120.5
Department of Accounting and Business Finance ; University of Vaasa
t...@uwasa.fi http://uwasa.fi/~ts BBS 961-3170972; FIN-65101, Finland
s520...@nickel.laurentian.ca
> KEEP HONKING, I'M RELOADING!
Must have been seen around Dallas, right?
Chris
scar
> There is an ongoing form of bumper sticker slogan that associate one's
> profession / favorite hobby with sexual virility. Some of these are
> funnier than others and many of the better ones I seem to have
> forgotten. Here's a couple I remember though:
>
> SKIN DIVERS DO IT DEEPER!
>
> RUGBY PLAYERS HAVE LEATHER BALLS
>
> LAWYERS DO IT IN THEIR BRIEFS
Ian Prideaux
Watza...@Netcom.com (Watzamatta U.) wrote:
>There is an ongoing form of bumper sticker slogan that associate one's
>profession / favorite hobby with sexual virility. Some of these are
>funnier than others and many of the better ones I seem to have
>forgotten. Here's a couple I remember though:
>
Computer network engineers do it with protocol
--
Ian.
(wo...@spuddy.mew.co.uk)
To err is human, but to really bugger it up you need a computer.
* Call Spuddy on (01268) 515441 for FREE mail & Usenet access *
rob...@inch.com
U.S out of North America
Mark E. Pitstick
>Support mental health
>OR I'LL KILL YOU!!!
Ted Kennedy's car has killed more people than my gun!
Barry Lennox
"Nuking gay black whales for Jesus"
Barry Lennox
BagMan
>On 3 Jan 1996 19:10:20 GMT, bte...@postoffice.ptd.net (Bradley Teets)
>wrote:
>>
>>. ...
>>.... .. .. .... -- .. .. .... ::: '. .. "... :..:.]
>>
>>
>>If you can read this then you are too close
>>
>>bte...@postoffice.ptd.net
>>
>There is an ongoing form of bumper sticker slogan that associate one's
>profession / favorite hobby with sexual virility. Some of these are
>funnier than others and many of the better ones I seem to have
>forgotten. Here's a couple I remember though:
>SKIN DIVERS DO IT DEEPER!
>RUGBY PLAYERS HAVE LEATHER BALLS
>LAWYERS DO IT IN THEIR BRIEFS
(On back of Pinto)
>WARNING---THIS CAR EXPLODES ON IMPACT
Still searching feverishly for a cure for nougat...
<JStr...@mddc.com>
ne...@relay.acadiau.ca
From: 013...@dragon.acadiau.ca (Kevin Swan)
Robert Bland <rob...@bigdaddy.mcc.virginia.edu> writes:
>tse...@ix.netcom.com(Mark Binns ) wrote:
>>
>> In <30ec8196...@10.0.2.1> Watza...@Netcom.com (Watzamatta U.)
>> writes:
>>
>> >There is an ongoing form of bumper sticker slogan that associate one's
>> >profession / favorite hobby with sexual virility. Some of these are
>> >funnier than others and many of the better ones I seem to have
>> >forgotten. Here's a couple I remember though:
>> >
>> >SKIN DIVERS DO IT DEEPER!
>> >
>> >RUGBY PLAYERS HAVE LEATHER BALLS
>> >
>> >LAWYERS DO IT IN THEIR BRIEFS
>>
>>
>> ALSO:
>>
>> WELDERS DO IT IN ALL POSITIONS
>>
>> IT STAYS UP LONGER WHEN YOU DO IT IN CONCRETE
>TENNIS PLAYERS HAVE FUZZY BALLS
How about
PILOTS HAVE SMOOTHER APPROACHES
pru...@umassd.edu
> profession / favorite hobby with sexual virility...
My favorite:
TAPE LIBRARIANS WILL MOUNT ANYTHING
- Phil (computer center sys mgr)
gaudreau
>
>KEEP HONKING, I'M RELOADING!
That was a good one.
I would like to find one in a store for those who insists on tailgating:
"IF WE ARE TO GET THIS INTIMATE, YOU COULD AT LEAST BUY ME A DRINK"
Wes Wright
>I would like to find one in a store for those who insists on tailgating:
>
>"IF WE ARE TO GET THIS INTIMATE, YOU COULD AT LEAST BUY ME A DRINK"
Hey gaudreau,
To put it more succinctly:
"IF YOU GET ANY CLOSER, YOU BETTER BE WEARING A CONDOM."
Glad I could help.
--mr. right
**********************************************************************
** Wes Wright we...@nafohq.hp.com **
**********************************************************************
Big_Blue
:
: >The Religious Right Is Neither
:
:
: Found at a gun show:
:
: I (heart) Love Cats --
: They taste just like chicken!
How about "looking for your cat?! Look under my tire!"
Al
babymash
I RAPED MY BABY TODAY
IS YOUR VAGINA SLOSHY
CHOCOLATE HAIL UNDIES.
BABYMASH
Paul Bishop
"SAVE A WHALE . . . HARPOON A FAT CHICK."
Greg
alt.i'm.a.fucking.loser.and.no.one.wants.me.around
Larry Smith
In article <4cmv6j$8...@ixnews8.ix.netcom.com>, rob...@ix.netcom.com(R & L Stivers ) writes:
> PILOTS SLIP IT IN
E-2 PILOTS DO IT LONGER...
--
| .-. .---..---. .---. .-..-. |"In general, the art of government consists |
| | |__ | | || |-< | |-< > / | in taking as much money as possible from |
| `----'`-^-'`-'`-'`-'`-' `-' | one ... citizen ... to give to the other." |
| My opinion alone, every word. | - Voltaire, "Money" (1764). |
B. Ridge
No Jesus, know sanity
BRIAN
Larry Smith
>(On back of Pinto)
>>WARNING---THIS CAR EXPLODES ON IMPACT
Saw that on a Pinto in front of me as I pulled out of a
tollbooth - then noticed an Audi pulling up behind me...
Christian Schlosser
- found on ... MY bumper! (Rusty '81 Chev Citation that goes like the
devil on a caffeine rush with matching dragging muffler and assorted dents ;)
Gregory L Hammers
rob...@inch.com <rob...@inch.com> wrote:
>U.S out of North America
No, no, *NO*!! It's "North America out of U.S."!
--
Jerry Henderson
>How about "looking for your cat?! Look under my tire!"
Or: the more you run over a cat, the flatter it gets!
--
Jerry
Red Sable
Hinerman) wrote:
>Rodent (wea...@dfw.net) wrote:
>
>: >The Religious Right Is Neither
>
>
>: Found at a gun show:
>
>: I (heart) Love Cats --
>: They taste just like chicken!
>
>or
>
>...especially with barbecue sauce.
>
>--
>____________________________________________________________________
>My employer didn't pay for this opinion, so they're not responsible.
>If you want to discuss it, contact me directly.
>dhi...@freenet.columbus.oh.us
Jesus Saves Sinners...And Redeems them for Valuable Cash & Prizes
Susan Devaney
Will be President for food
Jim Dirkes
Hmmm ...I remember back during the Nixon vs. McGovern race, my folks had
a bumper sticker that said, "McGovern can't lick our Dick!"
All the kids loved it!
Jim in Charleston
Frank Friedman
>I saw a good one today..
>
>
>I miss my x-wife
>but my aim is improving!
I heard a variation of this joke from a comedian on TV. (I can't
remember his name :( ): He said it as a poem entitled "I miss her
sometimes"
I ran into my ex-girlfriend the other day...
Then I backed up and ran into her again...
I miss her sometimes!
***************************************************************************
Frank E. Friedman fr...@bronze.coil.com
A true Diplomat will always remember a woman's birthday, but never her age.
***************************************************************************
Pinzavetsky
: In article <30EE07...@direct.ca>, Sanguinarius <kgre...@direct.ca> writes:
: > KEEP HONKING, I'M RELOADING!
: Must have been seen around Dallas, right?
: Chris
Or LA freeways and highways.
Chicago Red
I'm gonna buy that one!
Matthew Arnold
Thomas Britt
--
*----------------------------------------------------------------*
* Trying to sing what I can't say, *
* Trying to throw my head away. *
* *
* -- Freedy Johnston -- *
* *
* Thom Britt tho...@netcom.com *
*----------------------------------------------------------------*
Michael O. Brandt
I'm sure you've all seen the "I love my dog" bumper stickers, with
a heart representing "love".
A great variation has the heart replaced by a spade. Some people
don't even notice!
-- Mike Brandt
Mike Houston
Under Republicans, Man exploits Man.
Under Democrats, it's just the opposite!
Alex Knowles
>> I'm sure you've all seen the "I love my dog" bumper stickers, with
>> a heart representing "love".
>> A great variation has the heart replaced by a spade. Some people
>> don't even notice!
eh? oh... "I dig my dog" - I get it now , but it'd have to be on the
back of a hippy camper van :-)
pn...@hoasy5.isd4.tafensw.edu.au
MAFIA STAFF CAR
Keep your body in shape, sleep with a panel beater.
and
Men are living proof that women can take a joke!!!
This last could probably aply to both sexes.
The RAT
The Opinions and views expressed herein are not necessarily that of my
employer!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
PATRICIA NEAL Title: CAMPUS COORDINATOR
Western Institute Phone: (063) 431 786
GRENFELL CAMPUS Fax: (063) 424 128
TAFE NSW, Australia Internet: PATRIC...@tafensw.edu.au
Richard Cole
R & L Stivers
writes:
hello?? I believe he meant he spayed his dog (as in desexing it, for
you limeys) sheesh!