Cat joke
EC_S...@vaxa.ocs.mq.edu.au
"Would you like to pet my pussy?"
"I would love to if you'd move that damn cat."
Rob Cuthbertson
>
>"I would love to if you'd move that damn cat."
Carson and Eva Gabor? It's a bit of a paraphrase, if I remember the clip
correctly.
--Rob Cuthbertson, r...@spot.Colorado.EDU
Carol Jarosz
Yes, it was Carson and Gabor. Eva had her cat on her lap for her interview
which prompted Johnny's great line.
caj
Rich Wenner
On Johnny's penultimate (that's second-last, for the illiterati) show, Bette
Midler asked him if that story was true. He said "No, I would have remembered
that."
So we relegate yet another story to the (s)crapheap, where it can lie next to
the one about Johnny and Mrs. Arnold Palmer.
--
Rich Wenner | It is by the goodness of God that in our country we
wen...@pascal.tsd.eds.com | have those 3 unspeakably precious things: freedom
| of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence
#include <stddisclaimer.h>| never to practice either of them. Mark Twain
Russell Williams
>> >"Would you like to pet my pussy?"
>> >"I would love to if you'd move that damn cat."
>> Carson and Eva Gabor? It's a bit of a paraphrase, if I remember the clip
>> correctly.
>which prompted Johnny's great line.
No, urban legend. Documented both in Jan Brunvand's books and on the
final night of the Carson show.
Jerod Husvar
>:
>:Yes, it was Carson and Gabor. Eva had her cat on her lap for her interview
>:which prompted Johnny's great line.
>:
>:caj
>
>On Johnny's penultimate (that's second-last, for the illiterati) show, Bette
>Midler asked him if that story was true. He said "No, I would have remembered
>that."
>
>So we relegate yet another story to the (s)crapheap, where it can lie next to
>the one about Johnny and Mrs. Arnold Palmer.
>
>--
>Rich Wenner | It is by the goodness of God that in our country we
>wen...@pascal.tsd.eds.com | have those 3 unspeakably precious things: freedom
> | of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence
>#include <stddisclaimer.h>| never to practice either of them. Mark Twain
Sorry Rich, but on Johnny's LAST show, he showed the actual clip where he
did, in fact, say exactly that.
--
|| Jerod J. Husvar || Internet Relay Chat Admin, (On IRC as Jerod) ||
|| jer...@mcs.kent.edu || Self-Proclaimed Computer Addict ||
|| Kent State University || P.O. Box 35, Rootstown, Ohio, USA (216) 325-2849 ||
|| Kent, Ohio USA || I do consulting. #include <std.disclaimer> ||
Brian Holland
>In article <11...@pascal.einstein.eds.com> wen...@einstein.eds.com (Rich Wenner) writes:
>>:
>>:Yes, it was Carson and Gabor. Eva had her cat on her lap for her interview
>>:which prompted Johnny's great line.
>>:
>>:caj
>>
>>On Johnny's penultimate (that's second-last, for the illiterati) show, Bette
>>that."
>>
>>So we relegate yet another story to the (s)crapheap, where it can lie next to
>>the one about Johnny and Mrs. Arnold Palmer.
>>
>Sorry Rich, but on Johnny's LAST show, he showed the actual clip where he
>did, in fact, say exactly that.
>
>
>--
>|| Jerod J. Husvar
Sorry Jerrod, while Rich may be wrong, you are drastically incorrect.
No such clip was shown on thODDe last show. The clip that was actually
shown involved Jane Fonda (not Bette Midler) relaying the Gabor story
(when I was in grade school it was Racquel Welch, not Eva Gabor) as
told to her by her son. Carson denied it.
Accordingly, the true facts are:
1. Refutation took place on the last show (not second to last).
2. Jane Fonda (not Bette) initiated the discussion.
3. The Gabor event NEVER happened.
Brian
dp...@mc1adm.uwaterloo.ca
Not a legend at all. It wasn't on the "Tonight Show" though. If you're a
Freddy Krueger fan, you would know that this is from a scene in "Nightmare
On Elm St. Part 3". It was Jane Fonda who mentioned that her son had seen
Johnny say that on the show. Rent the tape.
Greg Moore
dp...@mc1adm.UWaterloo.ca
Van Snyder
Yet another case where "Hanoi" Jane Fonda is the authoritative reference.
--
Van Snyder = vsn...@math.jpl.nasa.gov
Mark Meyer
> did, in fact, say exactly that.
Sorry, Jerod, but on Johnny's last show he did NOT show such a
clip.
--
Mark Meyer | mme...@dseg.ti.com |
Texas Instruments, Inc. +--------------------+
Every day, Jerry Junkins is grateful that I don't speak for TI.
Vique's Law: A man without religion is like a fish without a bicycle.
Maurice E. Suhre
>In article <1992Jun20.1...@mcs.kent.edu> jer...@Condor.mcs.kent.edu (Jerod Husvar) writes:
>> Sorry Rich, but on Johnny's LAST show, he showed the actual clip where he
>> did, in fact, say exactly that.
>
> Sorry, Jerod, but on Johnny's last show he did NOT show such a
>clip.
I remember a clip on the last show where Jane "Hanoi" Fonda described
the incident and asked Johnny if it were true. I'm pretty sure he said
no.
--
Maurice Suhre
su...@trwrb.dsd.trw.com
Mark Wickersham
How's bout Dick Cavett and Raquel Welch? I do remember Carson P*ssing off
a guest so badly that first she walked off, then all the rest including
McMahon walked, and Carson ended up doing a striptease for the last five
minutes of the show. I can't remember what caused it, though. Could be
this, if I'm wrong about Cavett.
William Gathergood
I believe the Carson incident was with Arnold Palmer's wife.
Carson asked if there were anything she did to help her husband with his game.
She said that she sometimes kisses his balls for luck.
Carson said that probably helps to keep his putter straight.
Mrs. Palmer walked off the set immediately.
But the best story along this line, while I have you here, is the Groucho Marx
line that got him kicked out of television all together.
It was on You Bet Your Life and he was interviewing a man.
G: do you have any children?
M: I have 14 children, Groucho.
G: 14 children! How'd you ever get 14 children?
M: well, Groucho, I love my wife.
G: I love my cigar too, but I take it out every once in a while.
The FCC was furious <live T.V. in the 1950's> and suspended Groucho from
appearing on television for two years. When the two year suspension was up,
the Game Show Scandals had hit and that medium of entertainment died for a
while. Grouch never got back on television except for the late interviews with
Cavette.
Will Gathergood
how...@hplabsz.hpl.hp.com
>Reminds me of the joke that got Soupy Sales kicked off the air:
>
> My girlfriend and I have a deal at baseball games.
> I kiss her on the strikes and she kisses me on the balls.
>
No, that wasn't what got him kicked off the air. The first time it was for
telling the kids at home to find Mommy's purse and take all the the little
green pieces of paper out which had pictures of a man on them, and mail
them to him. The second time was for the joke "My girlfriend can't make my
apple pie, but she sure makes my banana cream."
================================================================
Howard Stateman how...@hpl.HP.COM [Not an HP spokesman]
"I have the heart of a little child, and the brain of a genius
-- and I keep them in a jar under my bed"
================================================================
Anatomically Correct Bulletin Board (415) 8-jovial [Adults only]
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frank.g.neves
> According to Lori Cole <lc...@andrew.cmu.edu>:
> >Reminds me of the joke that got Soupy Sales kicked off the air:
> >
> > My girlfriend and I have a deal at baseball games.
> > I kiss her on the strikes and she kisses me on the balls.
> >
> No, that wasn't what got him kicked off the air. The first time it was for
> telling the kids at home to find Mommy's purse and take all the the little
> green pieces of paper out which had pictures of a man on them, and mail
> them to him. The second time was for the joke "My girlfriend can't make my
> apple pie, but she sure makes my banana cream."
>
recall Soupy being fired for telling the "Firetruck" joke (what word starts
with "f" and ends with "uck"?). Perhaps that was his third firing...
Frank
Evolution: Wherein Man has progressed from hunting and gathering
to wheeling and dealing.
--
*************************************************************************
Frank G. Neves, R.Hy. | "Immanetize the Eschaton..."
Discl: No wife, no horse, no moustache | "Credo Quia Absurdum"
*************************************************************************
Eddie Krupa - Sun EHQ - IR Contractor
Have you heard Saliman Rushdies new bestseller
"Budda is a Fat Bastard.." ...?
Jamie Lubin
>>Reminds me of the joke that got Soupy Sales kicked off the air:
>>
>> My girlfriend and I have a deal at baseball games.
>> I kiss her on the strikes and she kisses me on the balls.
Actually, the 2nd line was:
I kiss her between the strikes & she kisses me between the balls.
mark.d.wuest
>In article <1992Jun29.2...@hplabsz.hpl.hp.com>, how...@hplabsz.hpl.hp.com writes:
>> According to Lori Cole <lc...@andrew.cmu.edu>:
>> >Reminds me of the joke that got Soupy Sales kicked off the air:
>> >
>> > My girlfriend and I have a deal at baseball games.
>> > I kiss her on the strikes and she kisses me on the balls.
>> >
>> No, that wasn't what got him kicked off the air. The first time it was for
>> telling the kids at home to find Mommy's purse and take all the the little
>> green pieces of paper out which had pictures of a man on them, and mail
>> them to him. The second time was for the joke "My girlfriend can't make my
>> apple pie, but she sure makes my banana cream."
>>
>Are you sure about that, Howard? The reason I ask is that I distinctly
>recall Soupy being fired for telling the "Firetruck" joke (what word starts
>with "f" and ends with "uck"?). Perhaps that was his third firing...
Soupy was on a talk show last week (was it Joan Rivers? Can we talk?) with
Buffalo Bob and the orginal Bozo the Clown. It was *Soupy*'s opinion
that the bit with the money and mommy's purse got him kicked off. Who
am I to tell him any different?
Mark
--
Mark Wuest
mark....@att.com
m...@cheshire.att.com (NeXT Mail Welcome!)
Thomas D. Halter
According to _More of the Straight Dope_ by Cecil Adams, the Groucho
Marx exchange took place on his radio game show You Bet Your Life, and
went like this:
GROUCHO: So, you got any kids?
FEMALE CONTESTANT: Yes, Groucho, I have 11 children.
GROUCHO: Eleven?! Did you say 11 kids?
FEMALE CONTESTANT: Well, I love my husband.
GROUCHO: Lady, I love my cigar, but I take it out of my mouth once in a
while.
Cecil also mentions a Soupy Sales yarn that he was either unable or
unwilling to verify. It goes as follows:
"One yarn has it that Soupy Sales was trying to teach the Alphabet to
White Fang the dog. Soupy would point at an X, say, and ask , "OK,
Fang, what letter is this?" Fang would grunt something, and Soupy would
say, "Very good. And what letter is that?" This continued until they
got to F. When Fang grunted his answer, Soupy said, "No, no, it's not
K, it's F." They went on to some other letters, and then came back to
F. Fang again grunted an answer, and Soupy said in an exasperated tone,
"No, Fang, I told you, it's not K. Every time I show you F, you see K!"
Does anybody know if this is true or not?
--
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how...@hplabsz.hpl.hp.com
>> telling the kids at home to find Mommy's purse and take all the the little
>> green pieces of paper out which had pictures of a man on them, and mail
>> them to him. The second time was for the joke "My girlfriend can't make my
>> apple pie, but she sure makes my banana cream."
>>
>Are you sure about that, Howard? The reason I ask is that I distinctly
>recall Soupy being fired for telling the "Firetruck" joke (what word starts
>with "f" and ends with "uck"?). Perhaps that was his third firing...
banana cream joke. There was also a rude scene with White Fang which
contributed to his getting the boot that day.
......................................................................
. Howard Stateman | I knew French was a language by age 6. .
. how...@hpl.HP.COM | At 19 I discovered it was also a tongue..
. [Not an HP spokesman] |Anatomically Correct BBS (415) 8-jovial .
........................................................................
John A. Weeks III
> According to Lori Cole <lc...@andrew.cmu.edu>:
> > Reminds me of the joke that got Soupy Sales kicked off the air:
> No, that wasn't what got him kicked off the air.
Johnny Carson had something similar to this happen on his show, and it ended
up costing him a ton of money in the ensuing law suit. He had the wife of a
famous golfer on the show. He asked her if they had any pre-game rituals.
She said no, and then without thinking, she said that she kissed her husbands
balls (meaning golf balls). The audiance broke out laughing, then Johnny asked
er if she stroked his putter. The woman walked off the show, and later sued
Carson.
-john-
--
==============================================================================
John A. Weeks III (612) 942-6969 jo...@newave.mn.org
Newave Communications, Ltd. ..!uunet!tcnet!newave!john
McCormick Martin
I heard almost the exact same story about Why is it everytime I write F
you see K? The only difference in the version I heard was that he was
writing the alphabet on a blackboard and a bunch of kids were saying the
letters. When he got to F they all yelled "K." I really think the version
about Fang is more plausible.
Martin McCormick