old --- never die jokes

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x93ne...@wmich.edu

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Apr 17, 1995, 3:00:00 AM4/17/95
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How 'bout: Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.

Jesse Flowers

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Apr 25, 1995, 3:00:00 AM4/25/95
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x93ne...@wmich.edu wrote:
: How 'bout: Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.

Old fishermen never die, they just can't raise their rods...
--
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Jesse Flowers | "Papers are looked upon favourably
Department of Earth Sciences | by those who excel in the sport of
Memorial University of Newfoundland | verbal diarheea." -Chris Morrison

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

The Lone Locust Of The Apocalypse

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Apr 25, 1995, 3:00:00 AM4/25/95
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On 25 Apr 1995, Jesse Flowers wrote:

> Date: 25 APR 1995 17:37:46 GMT
> From: Jesse Flowers <jflo...@sparky2.esd.mun.ca>
> Newgroups: rec.humor
> Subject: Re: old --- never die jokes

>
> x93ne...@wmich.edu wrote
> : How 'bout: Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.
>
> Old fishermen never die, they just can't raise their rods...

How bout.....
Old jokes never die they are just recycled three times a week on
rec.humor or alt.tasteless.jokes

Stephen Dailey

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Apr 26, 1995, 3:00:00 AM4/26/95
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>On 25 Apr 1995, Jesse Flowers wrote:
>
>> Date: 25 APR 1995 17:37:46 GMT
>> From: Jesse Flowers <jflo...@sparky2.esd.mun.ca>
>> Newgroups: rec.humor
>> Subject: Re: old --- never die jokes
>>
>> x93ne...@wmich.edu wrote
>> : How 'bout: Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.
>>
>> Old fishermen never die, they just can't raise their rods...

Old truckers never die, they just get a new Peterbilt...

-----
Steve

Wesley F Wright

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Apr 26, 1995, 3:00:00 AM4/26/95
to
: x93ne...@wmich.edu wrote:
: : How 'bout: Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.

Jesse Flowers (jflo...@sparky2.esd.mun.ca) wrote:
: Old fishermen never die, they just can't raise their rods...

Old fishermen never die, they just smell that way.

**********************************************************************
** Wes Wright wfwr...@corp.hp.com **
**********************************************************************


seb

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Apr 27, 1995, 3:00:00 AM4/27/95
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Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.

Old fishermen never die, they just can't raise their rods...

Old truckers never die, they just get a new Peterbilt...
old professors never die, they just lose their faculties

The Dragon

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Apr 27, 1995, 3:00:00 AM4/27/95
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Old accountants never die, thier pencils just go limp.

The Dragon (MHM 7x9)
"Its only a matter of time."


Kirk Williams

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Apr 28, 1995, 3:00:00 AM4/28/95
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In <Pine.SOL.3.91.950427102917.28213E-100000@sol> The Dragon <s3...@unb.ca> writes:

>On 27 Apr 1995, seb wrote:

>>
>> Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.
>>
>> Old fishermen never die, they just can't raise their rods...
>>
>> Old truckers never die, they just get a new Peterbilt...

>> Old professors never die, they just lose their faculties


>> Old accountants never die, thier pencils just go limp.

Old psychiatrist never die, they just lose their minds.

Anders Edlund

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Apr 29, 1995, 3:00:00 AM4/29/95
to
On Thu, 27 Apr 1995, The Dragon wrote:

>
>
> On 27 Apr 1995, seb wrote:
>
> >
> > Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.
> >
> > Old fishermen never die, they just can't raise their rods...
> >
> > Old truckers never die, they just get a new Peterbilt...

> > old professors never die, they just lose their faculties
Old professors never die, they just smell that way..


>
> Old accountants never die, thier pencils just go limp.
>

> The Dragon (MHM 7x9)
> "Its only a matter of time."
>
>
>

+--------------------------------------------+
| |
| I love this fucking university, |
| and this university loves fucking me |
| |
+--------------------------------------------+


Annoying Redneck

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Apr 29, 1995, 3:00:00 AM4/29/95
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In article <Pine.SOL.3.91.950427102917.28213E-100000@sol>, s3...@unb.ca
says...

>
>
>
>On 27 Apr 1995, seb wrote:
>
[snip
>> Old fishermen never die, [snip]

they only smell like it.

[snip]


----------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Del Rawlins | "Some said it was fur that took them west, and |
| fs...@aurora.alaska.edu| some said it was gold or land; but in the last |
| "Beware the fury of a | analysis it was the West that took them west...|
| patient man." | They were men of violence all, strong men of |
| --John Dryden | strong emotion, men who lived with strength and|
| | skill. Ulysses could have marched beside |
| "Anything rightly done,| Jedediah Smith, Crockett could have stormed the|
| however humble, is | walls of Troy. Either would have been at home |
| noble." | among the crews of Drake, Hawkins, or |
| --Sir H.F. Royce | Frobisher." --Louis L'Amour |
|------------------------|-------------------------------------------------|
| NRA NMLRA AFI AIP BAMF | I hunt, therefore I am. --Metallica |
|------------------------|-------------------------------------------------|
| Don't Tread on Me. | http://fsdcr.uafac.alaska.edu/ for Ak. CCW info |
----------------------------------------------------------------------------


Iain P. Grier

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May 1, 1995, 3:00:00 AM5/1/95
to
In article <3ns8qj$q...@news.alaska.edu>,

Annoying Redneck <fs...@aurora.alaska.edu> wrote:
>----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>| Del Rawlins | "Some said it was fur that took them west, and |
>| fs...@aurora.alaska.edu| some said it was gold or land; but in the last |
>| "Beware the fury of a | analysis it was the West that took them west...|
>| patient man." | They were men of violence all, strong men of |
>| --John Dryden | strong emotion, men who lived with strength and|
>| | skill. Ulysses could have marched beside |
>| "Anything rightly done,| Jedediah Smith, Crockett could have stormed the|
>| however humble, is | walls of Troy. Either would have been at home |
>| noble." | among the crews of Drake, Hawkins, or |
>| --Sir H.F. Royce | Frobisher." --Louis L'Amour |
>|------------------------|-------------------------------------------------|
>| NRA NMLRA AFI AIP BAMF | I hunt, therefore I am. --Metallica |
>|------------------------|-------------------------------------------------|
>| Don't Tread on Me. | http://fsdcr.uafac.alaska.edu/ for Ak. CCW info |
>----------------------------------------------------------------------------

You misspelt NAMBLA.

Bruce Tomlin

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May 1, 1995, 3:00:00 AM5/1/95
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Iain P. Grier (ipg...@sail.uwaterloo.ca) wrote in alt.fan.warlord:

>You misspelt NAMBLA.

Looks more like NAHPLA.
--
BOB-SUCKS-BOB-SUCKS-BOB-SUCKS-BOB-SUCKS-BOB-SUCKS-BOB-SUCKS-BOB-SUCKS-BOB-S
| _-----_ "BOB is coming!" - Microsoft U
S / x x \ __ ___ ___ EMAIL bto...@aol.com C
K | ___ | " | \ |__ /\ | |__| TO BOB!!!" - me K

Dennis Torraco

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May 3, 1995, 3:00:00 AM5/3/95
to
In article <3nnndc$8...@hippo.shef.ac.uk>, seb <S.C....@shef.ac.uk> says:
>
>
> Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.
>
> Old fishermen never die, they just can't raise their rods...
>
> Old truckers never die, they just get a new Peterbilt...
>old professors never die, they just lose their faculties

Old chemists never die, they just reach equilibrium.

Annoying Redneck

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May 4, 1995, 3:00:00 AM5/4/95
to
In article <3o3q7h$r...@crl10.crl.com>, bto...@crl.com says...

>
>Iain P. Grier (ipg...@sail.uwaterloo.ca) wrote in alt.fan.warlord:
>>In article <3ns8qj$q...@news.alaska.edu>,
>>Annoying Redneck <fs...@aurora.alaska.edu> wrote:
>>>-------------------------------------------------------------------------
---
>>>| Del Rawlins | "Some said it was fur that took them west, and


[snip]


-----------|-------------------------------------------------|
>>>| NRA NMLRA AFI AIP BAMF | I hunt, therefore I am. --Metallica
|

[snip]


--
>
>>You misspelt NAMBLA.
>
>Looks more like NAHPLA.

[snip]

Sorry, but it is NMLRA, and it is spelled correctly. It stands for National
Muzzle Loading Rifle Association. 8)

ObJoke:
Basically the NMLRA is a bunch of guys who go dress up in buckskins and furs
and stuff and carry old obsolete blackpowder weapons around and get together
to play mountain man on weekends. It is actually a lot of fun, and even
funnier to watch.

Begin offensive 16 line signature file:


----------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Del Rawlins | "Some said it was fur that took them west, and |
| fs...@aurora.alaska.edu| some said it was gold or land; but in the last |
| "Beware the fury of a | analysis it was the West that took them west...|
| patient man." | They were men of violence all, strong men of |
| --John Dryden | strong emotion, men who lived with strength and|
| | skill. Ulysses could have marched beside |
| "Anything rightly done,| Jedediah Smith, Crockett could have stormed the|
| however humble, is | walls of Troy. Either would have been at home |
| noble." | among the crews of Drake, Hawkins, or |
| --Sir H.F. Royce | Frobisher." --Louis L'Amour |
|------------------------|-------------------------------------------------|

| NRA NMLRA AFI AIP BAMF | I hunt, therefore I am. --Metallica | Don't |
|---------------------------------------------------------------| Tread |
| http://camelot.acf-lab.alaska.edu/~fsdcr/ for Alaska CCW info | On Me. |
----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hairy Little Frog

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May 4, 1995, 3:00:00 AM5/4/95
to
smda...@u.washington.edu (Stephen Dailey) writes:

>>On 25 Apr 1995, Jesse Flowers wrote:
>>
>>> Date: 25 APR 1995 17:37:46 GMT
>>> From: Jesse Flowers <jflo...@sparky2.esd.mun.ca>
>>> Newgroups: rec.humor
>>> Subject: Re: old --- never die jokes
>>>
>>> x93ne...@wmich.edu wrote

>>> : How 'bout: Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.


>>>
>>> Old fishermen never die, they just can't raise their rods...

Or..
Old fishermen never die, they just smell like it...



>Old truckers never die, they just get a new Peterbilt...

>-----
>Steve
Jago..

--
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
'Only naughty little frogs grow hair'
Listen to me or bad things will happen.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
'Only naughty little frogs grow hair'
Listen to me or bad things will happen.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Bahar

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May 4, 1995, 3:00:00 AM5/4/95
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In article <3o6oet$p...@mack.rt66.com> tor...@Rt66.com writes:
>
>In article <3nnndc$8...@hippo.shef.ac.uk>, seb <S.C....@shef.ac.uk> says:
>>
>>
>> Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.
>>
>> Old fishermen never die, they just can't raise their rods...
>>
>> Old truckers never die, they just get a new Peterbilt...
>>old professors never die, they just lose their faculties
>
>Old chemists never die, they just reach equilibrium.
>

Old guitarist never die, they just lost the tension in their G string.


Stephen Dailey

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May 4, 1995, 3:00:00 AM5/4/95
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In article <3o6oet$p...@mack.rt66.com>, Dennis Torraco <tor...@Rt66.com> wrote:
>In article <3nnndc$8...@hippo.shef.ac.uk>, seb <S.C....@shef.ac.uk> says:
>>
>>
>> Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.
>>
>> Old fishermen never die, they just can't raise their rods...
>>
>> Old truckers never die, they just get a new Peterbilt...
>>old professors never die, they just lose their faculties
>
>Old chemists never die, they just reach equilibrium.

Old gamblers never die, they just crap out.

-----
Steve

clovis lark

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May 4, 1995, 3:00:00 AM5/4/95
to

Old musicians never die, they just tune out

Old politicians never die, they just sell out


>-----
>Steve

David K. Wall

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May 9, 1995, 3:00:00 AM5/9/95
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[many other "old ___ never die..." jokes deleted...]

Old statisticians never die, they just approach it asymptotically.

David K. Wall dk...@nioshe2.em.cdc.gov, dar...@iac.net
"If art is communication, then Andy Warhol stutters." -- Me
Non-NIOSH home page: http://www.iac.net/~darkon
DISCLAIMER: They told me to put a disclaimer here....


KRod

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May 17, 1995, 3:00:00 AM5/17/95
to
: Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.

:
: Old fishermen never die, they just can't raise their rods...
:
: Old truckers never die, they just get a new Peterbilt...
: old professors never die, they just lose their faculties

old mathematicians never die, they just reduce to lowest terms

--

-->KRod <km...@monadnock.keene.edu>

"There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't."

John Wagner

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May 18, 1995, 3:00:00 AM5/18/95
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In article <3pdmi6$a...@pumpelly.monad.net>, km...@keene.edu ( KRod) writes:
|>: Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.
|>:
|>: Old fishermen never die, they just can't raise their rods...
|>:
|>: Old truckers never die, they just get a new Peterbilt...
|>: old professors never die, they just lose their faculties
|>
|>old mathematicians never die, they just reduce to lowest terms

old mathematicians never die, they just can't multiply.

--
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+ Heck even I don't know what I do, so the company can't. +
+ empire isn't a game, it's a world ruled by elves! :) +
+ Bowling IS a sport, and if you don't believe me, I'll beat'ya +
+ jwa...@mitre.org | John Wagner | PH# (703)883-3740 +
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Scott Kirkwood

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May 19, 1995, 3:00:00 AM5/19/95
to
|>: Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls.
|>:
|>: Old fishermen never die, they just can't raise their rods...
|>:
|>: Old truckers never die, they just get a new Peterbilt...
|>: old professors never die, they just lose their faculties
|>
|>old mathematicians never die, they just reduce to lowest terms
>old mathematicians never die, they just can't multiply.

Old sailors never die, they just get a little dingy.


Eric W. Crabtree

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May 29, 1995, 3:00:00 AM5/29/95
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Old chemists never die, they just quit reacting.


--
E. W. Crabtree (' ))`)
"Try and I try but I don't understand, //`
never seems to work out the way I have it planned" _//,._
-- J. Buffett ---'------`---


Joao Mendes

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Jun 1, 1995, 3:00:00 AM6/1/95
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cra...@eng.auburn.edu (Eric W. Crabtree) wrote:

> Old chemists never die, they just quit reacting.

Old quarterbacks never die, they just pass away...

Joao Mendes

Smile when you say that, stranger...

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