a flame on the Jedi religion
The DemonH8
The dark side detects a presence in the force.
Well today was indeed a slow day for news. However it seems at the last
possible minute our old friends the Jedi's have once again made the news.
Who are the Jedi's you may be wondering? Well simply put they have found
inspiration in George Lucas's films "Star Wars", and now follow the
fictional "Jedi code".
Another question is, who are the Jedi's to ThirdShift? And well, all I can
say is they have never failed to be a source of inspiration to us as well.
Which also brings me to the point, today news has been made when the Jedi's
opened an academy in Romania. To quote directly from the article.
"A Star Wars academy that teaches about the religion of the Jedi, use of the
light saber and speaking in Wookiee has opened its doors in Romania."
Now I ask you, and offer your chance to reply in a survey attached to this
article. WHAT LIGHT SABER? Now don't get me wrong if a light saber actually
existed I would probably be creaming my pants while trying to get one, but
they DON'T. Not to mention, how impressed your future or current boss will
be with your new second language of "Wookiee", Especially for those random
"just in case" moments when an actual "Wookiee" just happens to be strolling
down main street. However as usual with our "friends" the Jedi's, this is
certainly not the end but merely the beginning as we go to the next
paragraph of the article
"Adrian Pavel, who runs the country's Star Wars Club, decided to found the
Jedi Academy after getting so many questions from fellow fans on how they
can be more like their heroes in the Star Wars films."
So, Adrian Pavel is the name to blame for this recent accomplishment by the
Jedi's. He founded the academy "after getting so many questions from fellow
fans on how they can be more like their heroes in the Star Wars films." You
have no idea how much I hope he made that up. Seriously, the Jedi-ism as a
religion thing was funny at first, but you really need a life if you are
going to worship the fictional premise of the "force". Not that it's
necessarily worse then any other fictional basis's of popular religions, but
yes.. At the same time it is. Everyone has proof available to show that the
"FORCE" came from science fictional stories. In fact you would gain more
respect from me in this premise if you worshiped "Spy vs. Spy" , JTHM, Red
Meat, or Chopping Block.
"We have meetings and lectures, and we dress like Jedi's, but this is no
longer enough. We'll soon learn how to handle the light sabers in academy
classes".
Kill me, just kill me, it pains me to see these people playing "stupid
leading the retards". Actually it doesn't, I love making fun of morons like
this. Ok ok, meetings and lectures, normal but still stupid Jedi crap but
"We'll soon learn how to handle the light sabers in academy classes." I know
you do drugs, and it obviously allows you a fantastic world based entirely
in George Lucas's imagination, but light saber school? Come on dude, please
tell me you are not learning to fight with sticks and flashlights, while
daring to call your POS project an Academy. Harvard is an academy, Yale is
an academy, JEDI LIGHT SABER SCHOOL IS HERESY OF THE TERM ACADEMY!!!!
Congratulations though, you have graduated to complete Moron.
"The academy is open to everybody. There is a quiz with 100 questions that
will cover even the darkest aspects of the Star Wars phenomenon that needs
to be done in 24 hours. Anyone who passes quiz will have a place in the Jedi
Academy."
Hey KGI I bet you ten dollars right now in writing, that the majority of
questions on the 100 question test is star wars trivia. People what better
shining example of "wow you are stupid aren't you" do you need?
"The academy is also offering special modules for true devotees, like
cooking some of the dishes seen in the Star Wars films including Wookiee
Cookies, Princess Leia Danish doughnuts, Sand Trooper sandwiches and Twin
Sun toasts".
Jedi's listen to me, we have talked before. Look at this, to believe in "the
force" means you may as well believe that those "Wookiee Cookies, Princess
Leia Danish doughnuts, Sand Trooper sandwiches and Twin Sun toasts" came
from a crate off the F@cking Millennium Falcon itself. I like the Star Wars
movies and stories as much as the next person, but religion based upon one
of the fictional premises of any movie or story is just .. Well . to quote
Penn & Teller. BullShit. However, if you insist upon following the way of
"The Force" know that we at the ThirdShift will always be watching, and the
Cult of Darth3 will be waiting to ridicule you
Puppies were pressed in vices during the writing of this article so fuck
off!