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How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
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jmcquown
Jul 13, 2020, 10:08:05 AM7/13/20
to
After I posted this on the Swedish version of Coffee Machine Cuisine
people got very upset. Some of the things they called me was idiot,
cannibal (?) and they even said that I’m the reason for the low status
that cats got in this society. I don’t get why people are so upset?!
It’s no worse than eating a cow, pig or a chicken if you ask me. And
hunting must be the most humane way to kill animals for food.
It all took place on a warm and sunny day when me and Dan were out at
our cabin with all of our cats. Since we got so many cats I figured that
I could shoot one of them so I released them into the woods and began
the hunt. First I thought that the fat one, Gucci, would be an easy shot
but she managed to escape surprisingly quickly. It was the sun that
eventually was Iggy’s downfall. She is quite photophobic you see so she
could hardly see where she was going. And BAM, easy shot for me.
Time
5 hours
Ingredients
1 cat
½ red onion
1 pimiento
1 clove of garlic
2 ½ dl coconut milk
2 ½ dl cream
2 tbsp meat extract
Juice of lime
Ginger
Butter
Instructions
Skin, fillet and chop the kitty cat. Start your coffee maker, grease the
heater and place the pieces of your cat onto it. Fry it until they are
cooked throughly and tender, it will take about an hour (it depends on
what cut of meat you’re using and how fresh it is). Remove the meat and
wipe the heater.
Chop all of the remaining ingredients that shall be chopped. Put a
dollop of butter into the carafe, let it melt and then put the onion and
the garlic in the carafe and fry it for about half an hour. Season with
ginger. Add coconut milk, cream and meat extract and let it cook for two
hours – it should get really warm. After that add the cat meat and wait
a bit longer. Finally add pimiento pieces, lime juice and season
generously with freshly ground black pepper and just a little salt. Turn
off your coffee maker.
The best way to serve this delicious cat stew is accompanied by a glass
of a tasty red wine and freshly baked bread.
people got very upset. Some of the things they called me was idiot,
cannibal (?) and they even said that I’m the reason for the low status
that cats got in this society. I don’t get why people are so upset?!
It’s no worse than eating a cow, pig or a chicken if you ask me. And
hunting must be the most humane way to kill animals for food.
It all took place on a warm and sunny day when me and Dan were out at
our cabin with all of our cats. Since we got so many cats I figured that
I could shoot one of them so I released them into the woods and began
the hunt. First I thought that the fat one, Gucci, would be an easy shot
but she managed to escape surprisingly quickly. It was the sun that
eventually was Iggy’s downfall. She is quite photophobic you see so she
could hardly see where she was going. And BAM, easy shot for me.
Time
5 hours
Ingredients
1 cat
½ red onion
1 pimiento
1 clove of garlic
2 ½ dl coconut milk
2 ½ dl cream
2 tbsp meat extract
Juice of lime
Ginger
Butter
Instructions
Skin, fillet and chop the kitty cat. Start your coffee maker, grease the
heater and place the pieces of your cat onto it. Fry it until they are
cooked throughly and tender, it will take about an hour (it depends on
what cut of meat you’re using and how fresh it is). Remove the meat and
wipe the heater.
Chop all of the remaining ingredients that shall be chopped. Put a
dollop of butter into the carafe, let it melt and then put the onion and
the garlic in the carafe and fry it for about half an hour. Season with
ginger. Add coconut milk, cream and meat extract and let it cook for two
hours – it should get really warm. After that add the cat meat and wait
a bit longer. Finally add pimiento pieces, lime juice and season
generously with freshly ground black pepper and just a little salt. Turn
off your coffee maker.
The best way to serve this delicious cat stew is accompanied by a glass
of a tasty red wine and freshly baked bread.
Bruce
Jul 13, 2020, 11:03:49 AM7/13/20
to
jmcquown brought next idea :
What's the difference between eating pussy and driving in a snowstorm?
When you eat pussy, you can always see the asshole in front of you.
When you eat pussy, you can always see the asshole in front of you.
Thomas
Jul 13, 2020, 3:29:29 PM7/13/20
to
Probably forged but what the heck is meat extract?
jmcquown
Jul 13, 2020, 3:51:41 PM7/13/20
to
On 7/13/2020 3:29 PM, Thomas wrote:
> Probably forged but what the heck is meat extract?
>
Forged? Never!
> Probably forged but what the heck is meat extract?
>
Meat extract is highly concentrated meat stock, usually made from beef.
It is used to add meat flavour in cooking, and to make broth for soups
and other liquid-based foods. Meat extract was invented by Baron Justus
von Liebig, a German 19th-century organic chemist.
Ed Pawlowski
Jul 13, 2020, 4:48:10 PM7/13/20
to
Bruce
Jul 13, 2020, 5:00:58 PM7/13/20
to
Hank Rogers
Jul 13, 2020, 5:19:39 PM7/13/20
to
marinating it. The chinese like to use baking soda to get it more
mushy.
Hank Rogers
Jul 13, 2020, 5:20:24 PM7/13/20
to
Bryan Simmons
Jul 13, 2020, 8:55:40 PM7/13/20
to
--Bryan
Sqwertz
Jul 13, 2020, 10:16:03 PM7/13/20
to
wilderness area. I often find parts of neighbors cats and chickens
in my yard.
Coyotes got interrupted the other day and left this great looking
pure black chicken in my parsley patch. I don't even bother asking
people if they lost a pet. I simply asked for a bottle of white
wine to make coq au vin.
https://i.postimg.cc/XvWQh4vc/Chicken-in-Parsley.jpg
You can see I even browned out the bloody guts part but I still got
banned from Nextdoor.com for that. <Sheesh> Those people are so
uptight sometimes. It wasn't even wearing a mask!
-sw
Bryan Simmons
Jul 14, 2020, 1:10:11 PM7/14/20
to
>
> -sw
--Bryan
bruce2...@gmail.com
Jul 14, 2020, 1:16:56 PM7/14/20
to
Did it work on a puppy dog?
cshenk
Jul 14, 2020, 9:44:50 PM7/14/20
to
Subject: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
Date: Mon, 13 Jul 2020 10:08:00 -0400
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And the idiot forger does it again
Sqwertz
Jul 15, 2020, 12:01:32 AM7/15/20
to
I agree. Chickens started all this shit - they of all people should
be wearing masks. Those bastards.
-ww
Sqwertz
Jul 15, 2020, 12:02:42 AM7/15/20
to
On Tue, 14 Jul 2020 10:16:51 -0700 (PDT), bruce2...@gmail.com
wrote:
> Did it work on a puppy dog?
Are you in Harlem or Brooklyn?
-sw
wrote:
> Did it work on a puppy dog?
-sw
Bruce
Jul 15, 2020, 2:00:46 AM7/15/20
to
the timestamp means anything, he's on the US east coast. I think it's
the guy who once posted under the name Creme Fraiche or Patrick
Dennis.
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