In article <
1r7qq7l24pb9e3vsv...@4ax.com>,
You mean like:
Dark Shadows has some sporadic moments of fun but on the whole it's an
inferior recycled mash-up of Burton's style and Depp's quirky characters
from their eight collaborations.
"Dark Shadows has to be the most perfunctory, most self- parodic entry
to the [Burton] canon thus far."
It's a million dollar soap opera and screenwriter Seth Grahame-Smith
wrote the turd, and Tim Burton rolled it in glitter.
The film is lifeless, which would be a funny thing to say about a
vampire movie if it weren't so true.
A half-baked auto-update of the classic series, and a suggestion that
Burton's persistent style has finally worn thin.
There were only a handful of genuine laughs... and that puts it on a par
with Scary Movie 3.
Dark Shadows is a mess, and it's unclear whether its bizarre recipe of
comedy, campy horror, and gothic melodrama will satisfy anyone,
regardless of their familiarity with the source material.
All fangs and no bite, Dark Shadows is another bland Tim Burton
rebranding of a classic product
Can't decide whether it's a parody, a horror comedy, an atmospheric
melodrama, or a tedious bucket of crap. Eventually it chooses the last
one.
[Burton] fails on levels I wouldn't have imagined possible.
Less a resurrection than a clumsy desecration.
If it wasn't for Twilight, I might be blaming Tim Burton and Johnny Depp
for ruining vampires.
[S]hockingly, appallingly inept, and it keeps getting worse and worse,
as if it were descending into its very own bespoke circle of cinematic
hell... Depp [is] parodying himself, which is hugely unpleasant to
watch...
How bad is "Dark Shadows"? It makes you long for a "Twilight" movie.
That's bad.
When Burton is going through the motions, his films are as involving as
a school play. He directs this film on autopilot. Ed Wood would have
done it better.
Tim Burton is like a billionaire fanboy who buys Bela Lugosi's Dracula
cape: he has a perfect right to it, but that doesn't mean it looks good
on him.
...a disappointingly underwhelming endeavor that stands as the latest
misfire from a once rock-solid filmmaker...
It's clunky, to say the least ...
The script is an unholy mess, stumbling between comedy, action, horror
and romance, without any clue how to navigate these shifts in tone.