SOS from Hollywood Boulevard
I think it hit me just as I was riding down the 'big' waterslide at Las
Vegas' Wet n' Wild recently. It must have been over 110 degrees in the
desert that afternoon as I screamed and let go. I think I let go of a lot
of things on the slide that day. I had just come from a 'turkey brunch' at
the Golden Nugget Hotel downtown and I was in a 'man is stupid' mode anyway.
What weird people we are -- turkey and cranberry sauce in the middle of a
100-plus degree desert nowhere. At the Nugget someone was cussing-out the
waitress for not bring her 'diet' caffeine-free cherry coke. Whatever
happen to just coke, lady. Whatever happen to just being. How many
jackpots do we really need to win -- to what end is all of this vanity
leading? Okay, so I might have the end of the century jitters, I may be
too caught-up in the 'meaningless' out here in the great West. It's just
that the pain of that meaninglessness hits at funny times -- like when I am
shooting down a gigantic waterslide in the dust of Nevada. Please stay with
me as I tell you about what Hollywood Boulevard has done to us -- just look
at Kevin Costner, in his new drama WATERWORLD he ends up drinking his own
urine for survival. The Mariner (Costner's character) is so thirsty in one
scene he drinks his own waste. Shocked? You shouldn't be -- in Hollywood,
we have our waste for breakfast, lunch and dinner.
I am noticing that Hollywood these days is in the horrible position of
having to come up with even more outrageous violence and sex to get the
attention, to grab an audience, to out-do last seasons triumphs. Just look
at KIDS, SHOWGIRLS, HEAT and JADE -- these forthcoming movies are some of
the nastiest ever produced. One studio player told me, "You have not seen
anything yet, the child porn of KIDS and the ultra-violence in HEAT will
look mild in a few years."
Producers, writers and directors -- this is how you earn your living? You
wanted to contribute to the world, you wanted to make it better through your
presence, you wanted to lift us a little out of the muck. You poor man.
You poor woman. And no amount of celery juice, jogging, personal training,
golf, no amount of psychotherapy, charity giving or ashram visiting is going
to make you feel better or change this fact: you with your University
honors and your good-natured, affluent, Jewish parents back East, you are
making pure trash and have sold your soul. Boo. Hiss.
Actress Brett Butler (Grace Under Fire) was so very angry that the Emmy
people left her out again this year -- she is turning bitter and old before
her time. Brett, who cares about the Emmy -- be grateful for what you do
have. You know what it is like to have nothing. We have seen those ugly
HARD COPY stories about your life before you came to the Boulevards. You
were broke and didn't have much. Now look at you, you are blessed. Are you
so ill that you can not separate the real from the unreal? It is cute and
funny to be upset in your role as Grace but when you leave those Studio City
gates it's just you and your maker. You have so much Brett, why the anger.
Are you afraid to give it up? Are you afraid that if you don't stay mean
and nasty Hollywood will turn on you? Brett, they probably would turn on
you, as you and I know, you have to be a damaged freak to win the attention
of 'the cameras.' If you are centered and whole in the Los Angeles basin,
Central Casting doesn't like you. But your weekend fit over the lack of
Emmy-love is showing me that you are far from whole. You will be adored for
your misplaced anger -- they will cover your upset. Rage-on woman! You
told USA TODAY WEEKEND recently, "The Conservatives' social agenda rules out
everyone who doesn't fit their image. It's a God-goyim-sexist-racist thing
that's going to eat us alive!"
Folks in the Valley think it's conservatism that is the death of America --
while folks in Culver City believe it is technology.
I recently walked-out of a screening for the new movie THE NET. Hollywood
is now trying to ruin my new friend the Internet, with a lame vision of
omni-present technology run amuck. Boring. Director Irwin Winkler uses
every computer-cliché in the book (get wired, cyber etc...) to seem hip and
relevant. He offends. Actress Sandra Bullock is a wreck. The story is so
anti-new media, one wonders if the downers at SONY are not the playing the
victim. Could it be that SONY feels the Internet is taking away from their
power base (old media) that they have to paint the great new technology as
'evil.' *Message from SONY: Internet=Evil.. Internet=Evil...turn your TV's
and CD's back on..we are making no money off of you when you are on the
Internet...You may become a victim of invasion of privacy like Bullock's
Angela Bennett..watch out!* The entire premise of this film is so
breathtakingly stupid. America should mourn the day that director Winkler
first picked up an issue of WIRED magazine or went to the 'Cyber Java' down
in Venice Beach. (Cyber Java, the latest and greatest trend to come out of
Los Angeles is a coffee house with computers that is just seconds away from
the Pacific Ocean. While you drink a cup of your favorite flavor of coffee
or chew on some sugar-free cheesecake you can now use the Cafe's computers
to get on-line. I called 'Cyber Java' to ask if anyone has spilled any
coffee on their computers yet -- I had been told by a friend that 4
keyboards and 2 monitors have been 'Java-ed' and I wanted to see if the
establishment would admit. The person who answered the phone told me,
"Spilling is a major concern of the investors.' This trend looks like it
might not leave Los Angeles or at least not until computers are waterproof.)
I walk the street known as Hollywood Boulevard several times a day, I
live just off of the main strip. This summer there has been quite a few
nice evenings with near perfect temperatures and glory-filled sunsets. This
is where I have chosen to call 'home.' Lately, I have really hit my stride
-- loads of 'important ones' talk to me, I am invited to go almost
everywhere and I am more secure financially that I have ever been. So why
the emptiness? Why do I begin each day looking out of my window? Am I
looking for my real home beyond the earth and into the heavens? They built
Los Angeles facing the west --facing the ocean -- almost as if to ignore the
rest of the country. They have gone all of the way -- they ignore God.
----MATT DRUDGE 07/23/95 12:33:30 AM
The DRUDGE REPORT is filed when circumstances warrant.
Send all comments or subscription requests to: dru...@lainet.com
P.O. Box 1171 Hollywood, CA 90078
please include the e-mail address for each subscription
Check: http://www.lainet.com/~drudge for DRUDGE STORM REPORTS,
letters to the Editor, polling updates and flashes
(c) Matt Drudge 1995 not for reproduction without permission of the author
Umm, there have been these things out of LA for a while (two years
maybe).. I think they started in SF.
unk...@apple.com Apple II Forever
These opinions are mine, not Apple's.
Time for therapy!