<MiSTing> MMPR:TM- The Script [4/11]
TCurryFan
<6 5 4 3 2 @>
<SOL- Theater>
>
> 21 EXT. COMMAND CENTER - NIGHT 21
>
> The Rangers climb a mountain path, all of them looking
> alarmed. Up ahead, there's a PILLAR OF BLACK SMOKE rising
> from the Command Center.
>
>
> 22 INT. COMMAND CENTER - NIGHT 22
>
> The place is trashed -- there's SMOKING debris, ravaged
> panels, exposed wires and mechanisms. The kids move through
> the wreckage in numb silence.
>
> TOMMY (barely audible)
> ... what happened here?...
>
> Adam spots Alpha's arm protruding from a mound of rubble.
TOM: Woo-hoo! Alpha's dead!
All: <cheer>
>
> ADAM
> Guys!
MIKE: <falsetto> Yes?
>
> The kids quickly uncover the battered robot.
>
> BILLY
> Alpha, are you okay?!
TOM: <like a mantra> Pleasesayno, pleasesayno, plasesayno....
>
> ALPHA 5
> I'll GET you my pretty, and your
> little DOG toa!!
>
> BILLY
> He must've blown an anitromic
> demodulator!
CROW: Gee, I didn't know he was into that sort of thing.
>
> KIMBERLY (stunned)
> Oh, no...
TOM: Oh, like she even understands what Billy said!
>
> Everybody follows Kimberly's gaze, thunderstruck expressions
> coming over them.
MIKE: Followed by lightning and a 30% chance of rain.
>
> Laying on a destroyed bed of crystals is Zordon.
TOM: You will bow before me, son of Jor-El!
>
He is still a
> SHIMMERING SPECTRAL being, only now he s aged a good fifty
> years.
MIKE: As opposed to a bad 50 years.
>
> The kids stand over him, forlorn.
>
> AISHA
> ... What's happening to him?'
>
> BILLY
> Outside of his time warp he's
> aging at a vastly acellerated
> rate!
MIKE: <as Billy> COOL!
>
> KIMBERLY
> We have to help him!
>
> Zordon opens his eyes.
CROW: Oh, damn- you kids are still here.
>
> ZORDON
> ... Rangers... thank goodness
> you're safe.
>
> The kids drop down beside him.
>
> TOMMY
> We have to get you back inside
> your time warp.
ALL: <singing> Let's do the Time Warp again!
>
> ZORDON
> I'm afraid that's impossible...
> The power has been destroyed.
> It's gone... The Zords, the
> weapons... all of it.
ALL: Woo-hoo!
> (beat)
> The Mighty Morphin Power Rangers
MIKE: Yes, please do.
> are no more.
All: <jubilant cheers>
>
> The kids are stunned. Kimberly gently takes Zordon's hand.
TOM: Ewww... He's gonna want that back, ya know.
>
> KIMBERLY
> Zordon... you can't leave us.
TOM: You haven't seen the Turbo episodes, have ya, Kim? Not only
CAN he leave you, but he did!
MIKE: Thanks for that tidbit of info, Tom.
TOM: Any time, Mike.
> Ever since you came into our
> lives... you've been like another
> father `to us all.-
CROW: <as random male Ranger> Oh, so THAT'S why my real name is
"Zordon, Jr"!
>
> ZORDON
> ... You must be strong...
MIKE: <singing> And try to hang on...
CROW: Wow, two Rocky Horror references in the same scene!
> Ivan
> almost overthrew the planet
> once... and now I'm afraid he
> has the strength to see his
> scheme through.
TOM: Well, hey, at least he finishes what he starts.
>
> Zordon closes his eyes. Tommy puts a hand on Kimberly's
> shoulder.
MIKE: Probably the same hand Kim took from Zordon a few lines
ago.
> The kids slowly rise, all of them looking utterly
> despondent. Billy turns to Alpha.
CROW: Yeah, I can see Billy being into-
MIKE: Don't finish that thought, please.
CROW: Well... Since you said "please".
>
> BILLY
> what're we going to do?
'BOTS: Panic! AHHH!!
>
> ALPHA 5
> I do not LIKE Green Eggs and Ham!
> I do not like them, Sam-I-am!
TOM: So, basically, Alpha is only slightly less useful and
incomprehensible than usual.
>
> Billy opens a panel on Alpha's back, makes an adjustment.
> Alpha's head rolls back like he's going to sneeze.
>
> ALPHA 5
> Ah-Ah-Ahhhh-CHOO!!
ALL: Gesundheit!
>
> SPARKS BURST from where his nose should be. He SNIFFS.
CROW: <as Alpha> Whew! You guys need a shower!
>
> ALPHA 5
> Thanks, Billy.
>
> Rocky hands Alpha a hanky, Alpha wipes his nose area.
MIKE: Ewww...
TOM: I guess this is what they meant by "different levels of
snot".
>
> ADAM
> There has to be something we can
> do.
>
> TOMMY
> Come on, guys, think!
TOM: <as random Ranger> Wha?
>
> Aisha turns to Alpha.
CROW: Well, now-
MIKE: Enough, Crow...
>
> AISHA
> Alpha. Is there any way we can
> defeat this monster? Any way at
> all?
TOM: You could show him a bunch of Zeo episodes and bore him to
death.
>
> ALPHA 5
> ... Perhaps there is a way... I
> have heard tales of another
> power.
MIKE: There is... another!
>
> ADAM
> What?!
TOM: Which word didn't you understand?
CROW: Probably all of them.
TOM: No, that's ROCKY who's the monumental idiot.
CROW: Oh. MY mistake.
>
> ALPHA 5
> ... They say that somewhere
> beyond the Hyperion Constellation
> there exists a mythological power
> that is beyond all comprehension.
MIKE: Well now, that makes sense- they'll look for a
mythological power beyond all comprehension to battle an
evil beyond all comprehension.
CROW: I just don't understand any of this...
TOM: Oh, good one, Crow.
>
> TOMMY
> How can we get to it?
>
> ALPHA 5
> As the legend goes, the power is
> impossible to obtain.
CROW: <as Tommy> Well then why are you telling us about it?!?
>
> ROCKY
> We have to try, Alpha. It's our
> only hope.
MIKE: But it's _impossible_ to obtain...
>
> Alpha shakes his head.
>
> ALPHA 5
> It's far too dangerous. Zordon
> would never allow it.
TOM: I got news for ya, bubble-head, Zordon's not really in a
position to argue right now...
>
> AISHA
> If we don't try, Zordon won't
> survive!
>
> ADAM
> If Ivan Ooze isn't stopped,
> nobody will survive.
>
> Alpha heaves a sigh.
>
> ALPHA 5
> Ay, yi, yi, yi.
MIKE: ARGH!
> (beat)
> The legend speaks of a Master
> Warrior who lives on the planet
> Phaedos... This is the only
> person who knows the secrets of
> the power.
>
> AISHA
> How can we reach Phaedos?
CROW: Easy; it's the second star to the right, and straight on
till morning.
>
> Alpha heaves a SIGH.
MIKE: As does the audience.
>
> ALPHA 5
> Zordon's going to have my
> orbicular spheroids when he hears
> out about this!
MIKE: And you know how painful THAT can be!
TOM: Well, actually...
>
> The kids exchange curious looks as Alpha opens a compartment
> and removes a vile
CROW: "A vile" what?
> filled with RADIOLUMINESCENT ENERGY.
>
> ALPHA 5
> This is an emergency reserve of
> morphonic emissions. It should
TOM: "Moronic emissions"?
Mike: Ewwww...
> be enough to get -you there.
>
> He approaches a damaged panel, loads in the vile.
MIKE: So, these people are writing movie scripts, and they don't
even know the difference between "vile" and "vial"?
>
> ALPHA 5
> There is one problem. I only
> have enough reserve to send you
> Phaedos... I can't bring you
> back.
MIKE: So they'll be stuck there, right? And this is bad- why?
>
> ADAM
> So how do we get back?
>
> Alpha gives them a grim look.
TOM: And heaves a sigh?
>
> ALPHA 5
> ... You'll have to pray that the
> legends are true.
>
> Alpha keys in coordinates.
>
> ALPHA 5
> You're sure you want to do this?!
> The Rangers share purposeful looks.
TOM: Alpha says that?
>
> TOMMY
> It's our only hope.
MIKE: Help me, Obi-... Aw, skip it.
>
> Alpha shakes his head, punches in the final codes.
>
> ALPHA
> Safe journey, Rangers!
>
> He pulls a lever.
TOM: There's 50 ways to love your lever!
>
> ALPHA 5
> BE CAREFUL!!
MIKE: <as Alpha> Nice knowing you! See you in Hell!
>
> The kids TRANSFORM INTO SIX STREAKS OF COLOR AND BLAST 0FF
> THROUGH THE CEILING. Alpha shakes his head in despair.
TOM: <as Alpha> They're gonna come back- I just know it.
>
> ALPHA 5
> Ay, yi, yi, yi. They're DOOMED!!
ALL: MUHAHAHAHAHA!!!
>
> 23 thru 27 OMITTED
TOM: Aw, man! Those scenes could've been GOOD, too!
MIKE: I wouldn't bet on it.
>
> 28 EXT. EARTH - NIGHT 28
>
> We see the SIX COLORED STREAKS BLAST away from earth and SHOOT
> PAST the moon.
MIKE: ...running smack into a cow.
>
> The CAMERA MOVES IN on Zedd's ominous palace which rises up
> out of the tortured landscape. Zedd, Rita, Mordant and Goldar
> are standing on the balcony.
MIKE: Oh, Romeo, Romeo...
>
> 29 INT. ZEDD'S PALACE - NIGHT 29
TOM: Zedd's Palace: After Dark.
>
> Zedd, Rita and their minions are inside Zedd's dark palace
> Goldar looks through Rita's telescope as Rita rants.
>
> RITA (outraged)
> How could he let them slip
> through his hands?! He's no
> better than the rest of the hired
> help around here!
>
> Goldar looks up from the telescope.
CROW: <as Goldar> I LOVE it when Scorpina forgets to close the
drapes when she changes...
>
> GOLDAR
> According to the TX Tracker,
> they're headed for Phaedos.
>
> ZEDD
> I'm gonna fire that slimeball so
> fast his not gonna know what hit
> him!
>
> Ivan sweeps regally into the room.
>
> IVAN
> Hi, honey, I'm home !
MIKE: Thanks for the warning!
>
> RITA
> You garlic-sucking DINGLEBRAIN!
> The Rangers are going after the
> Great Power
> (to Zedd)
> I thought you said this guy was
> the Master of Disaster?
> (to Ivan)
> He's nothing but a slime-
> infested, jelly-bellied blob of --
>
> Ivan SNAPS his hand -- a WAD OF OOZE FLIES OUT, SPLATS RITA
> across the mouth, muffling her.
ALL: <cheer>
>
> RITA
> Rrgh mmffpprr brghuh!!
>
> ZEDD
> How dare you?! Nobody shuts up
> Rita but me!
MIKE: Spousal abuse is FUN!
>
> IVAN
> Sorry, slick, there's been a
> slight'change of plans.
> (arms out in trademark stance)
> The "booger man" is taking over.
MIKE: Ewwww...
TOM: Gratuitous snot joke #3!
>
> Ivan drops regally into Zedd's chair.
CROW: How do you "drop" regally?
>
> ZEDD
> Nobody double-crosses Lord Zedd
> and lives!
>
> Mordant slips behind Goldar, using him as a shield.
>
> MORDANT
> Zedd's gonna kick this snotball
> into next week!
>
> Zedd SHOOTS A BLAST from his staff -- Ivan is COVERED IN
> SPARKS.
>
> IVAN
> Ooooh, that tickles!
CROW: Oh, this is so wrong...
>
> Ivan raises his hands and the sparks DISAPPEAR.
>
> IVAN
> My turn.
>
>
> He ZAPS Rita and Zedd, and with a BRILLIANT FLASH, THEY'RE
> GONE.
TOM: Damn! And they're the BEST villains this show has ever
had!
>
> Mordant moves to a snow-globe on the table, his mouth falling
> open. Zedd and Rita are INSIDE IT!!
>
> Rita wipes the ooze off her mouth, RANTS IN A MUNCHKIN VOICE.
ALL: <singing> We are the lollipop guild, the lollipop guild,
the lollipop guild...
>
> RITA
> This is all your fault! If you'd
> taken me out tonight like you
> were suposed to, none of this
> would've happened.
>
> Ivan turns menacingly to Goldar and Mordant.
>
> IVAN
> Now you have a choice, either
> serve me, or join those
> insufferable cheesedongs.
MIKE: Let's leave this one alone, ok?
>
> Mordant and Goldar exchange a look, then turn back to Ivan.
>
> GOLDAR
> We never liked the cheesedongs in
> the first place.
>
> MORDANT
> Couldn''t stand them -- low-class
> all the way. And did you catch
> a whiff of their BREATH?!
CROW: He should talk...
> It's
> like having a conversation with
> a couple of ONIONS! Not to
> mention...
>
> Goldar throws a hand over Mordant's mouth,
MIKE: There's that rogue, detachable hand again!
CROW: Man, that thing is everywhere...
>
MUFFLING him.
>
> GOLDAR (apologetic)
> He's just visiting for the
> summer.
> (beat)
TOM: Yes, please beat him. And hit yourself a few time while
you're at it.
> Now what about,the Rangers, oh
> hideous one?
>
> IVAN
> Ah yes, the RANGERS!!!
>
> He makes a HOARKING SOUND then SPITS OOZE ONTO THE FLOOR,
ALL: EEEWWWWWWWWWW!!!
>
> MORDANT
> Gasunteidt.
>
> Now the OOZE GROWS INTO TEN TENGU WARRIORS -- BIRD-LIKE
> CREATURES WITH LONG BEAKS AND ENORMOUS WINGS.
>
> THEY GOBBLE, SQUAWK AND CHIRP like newborn chickens, the
> CACOPHONY GROWING LOUDER AND LOUDER
ALL: Woo! PACKERS! Packers win, etc...
>
until...
>
> IVAN
> SHUT YOUR BEAKS !!
>
> The Tengu fall dead silent.
TOM: And the audience just falls dead.
>
> IVAN
> Tengu Warriors, you will fly to
> Phaedos, find the Power
> Rangers... and TEAR THEM APART!
MIKE: But not necessarily in that order.
>
> The creatures make HORRENDOUS SQUAWKING SOUNDS AS THEY
> SPREAD THEIR REPTILIAN WINGS.
>
> IVAN
> Mordant, go with them and report
> back to me!
>
> MORDANT
> You know boss, I'd really like to
> help out but I've got this
> gastronomic condition which rules
> out all space trave--
MIKE: Mordant; the C-3PO of bad guys.
<The 'BOTS shudder>
>
> One of the Tengu grabs hold of Mordant and the FLOCK WINGS OFF
> LIKE COLOSSAL BATS.
>
> MORDANT
> IIIIIII!!!
CROW: Oh, it's bad enough when Alpha does it- now him, too?
>
> ANGLE ON - SNOW GLOBE
>
> Zedd waves his arms around in outrage.
>
> ZEDD
> Isn't this just TYPICAL! We
> finally do somebody a good turn
> and just look what happens!
>
> RITA
> From now on it's E-V-I-L, NO
> exceptions!
>
> RITA (optional line)
> It just goes to show, ya never go
> into business with a booger.
TOM: Hmmm... I like the first one.
CROW: But the second one has yet another snot reference.
TOM: Oh, good point.
>
> 29A EXT. OUTER SPACE - NIGHT 29A
TOM: How do you have NIGHT in outer space?
>
> The Tengu warriors sweep toward us
ALL: AAAH!!
> -- we see Mordant dangling
> from one of the Tengu's talons.
>
> MORDANT
> Watch the HAIRRRRRRRR!!
ALL: <singing> Give me a head with HAIR! Long beautiful
HAAAAIIIR!
>
> He SWINGS PAST CAMERA and out of sight.
>
> 30 thru 32A OMITTED
MIKE: Look at it this way, guys- that's two less parts we have
to read.
>
> 32B EXT. SPACE 32B
>
> The COLORED STREAKS OF LIGHT SHOOT THROUGH THE COSMOS,
> heading down toward the planet, PHAEDOS. It's emerald
> green with two radiant golden circles around it.
>
> 32C EXT. JUNGLE CLEARING / PHAEDOS - DAY 32C
>
> The STREAKS OF COLOR hit the jungle floor and only FIVE
> RANGERS MATERIALIZE.
TOM: I hope Tommy's the one who didn't make it.
>
> TOMMY
> Everybody okay?
TOM: Damn.
>
> KIMBERLY
> Where' s BILLY? !
TOM: No! Not Billy! I actually LIKE Billy!
>
> The kids search the sky in a panic.
>
> 32D OMITTED 32D
>
> 32E INT. COMMAND CENTER - DAY 32E
>
> Alpha works frantically hitting buttons and levers.
>
> ALPHA 5
> Ay, yi, yi, yi! The filamentary
> transistors have malfunctioned!
MIKE: Don't you just hate it when that happens?
>
> SPARKS erupt from the panel, SINGING ALPHA.
ALL: <singing> Alpha... Alpha...
> He snarls.
>
> ALPHA 5
> Why you low-frequency, battery
> operated --
CROW: Oh, Alpha, don't say "battery operated"...
>
> Alpha winds up and DELIVERS A MIGHTY KICK to the panel.
> suddenly comes to life with BLEEPS and BLIPS.
>
> 32F EXT. JUNGLE CLEARING / PHAEDOS - DAY (OLD SC. 32C)
>
> The Rangers continue scouring the sky as BILLY COMES FLYING.
MIKE: ...but he gets too close to the sun, so the wax on his
wings melt, and he plummets to his death.
>
> BILLY
> WHOAAAAAAHHHH!!!
>
> He SPLASHES DOWN in a puddle.
> AISHA
> BILLY!!
CROW: Don't be a hero!
<MIKE & TOM look at Crow>
CROW: Oh, ONE of us was gonna say it eventually.
TOM: He's right, you know.
MIKE: Yeah...
>
> The others quickly gather around him.
>
> KIMBERLY
> You okay?
>
> BILLY
> I think so.
CROW: <as Billy> Lean in a little closer Kim, then I'll
DEFINITELY feel better
>
> Billy looks down at the puddle.
>
> BILLY
> This puddle thing is really
> getting on my nerves.
TOM: Losing bladder control is so tragic.
>
> They help Billy up then take in the exotic jungle environment.
> They hear all sorts of EXOTIC ANIMAL SOUNDS.
ALL: Mmmooooo...
>
> AISHA
> Welcome to beautiful downtown
> Phaedos.
>
> ROCKY
> ... Incredible...
>
> Tommy gives them all an invigorating look.
TOM: What, exactly, is an "invigorating look"?
>
> TOMMY
> Let's see if we can find this
> Master warrior.
>
> He leads the team down a narrow path.
MIKE: To their doom.
<Commercials>
"Did anything about that seem strange to you?"
-Agent K (Tommy Lee Jones), _Men_in_Black_
Catherine Johnson ---------- MiSTie #75,125 ---------- TCur...@aol.com