Google Groups no longer supports new Usenet posts or subscriptions. Historical content remains viewable.
Dismiss

[HUMOR] - Reasons the Klingon Language Is Better Than French

14 views
Skip to first unread message

Stan Jensen

unread,
Feb 25, 2004, 10:40:19 AM2/25/04
to
Reasons the Klingon Language Is Better Than French

In Klingon, when we swear, everyone knows it. In French, nobody does.

Does Klingon even *HAVE* a word for "surrender"?

Really, can you truly complain about the quality of your gagh in
French?

There is no known Klingon translation for "Jerry Lewis is a comedic
genius."

With a mastery of Klingon, you won't have to be bothered with
time-wasters like relationships, dates and members of the opposite
sex.

Klingons have 26 ways to describe removing an enemy's spine. The
French have 26 ways to describe themselves as spineless to their
enemies.

The French only spit on Americans. Klingons spit on *everybody* when
they talk!

French words have too many Ss, and Ss are for Ha'DIbaH!

French may be the language for romance, but chicks really dig the
he-man who can master Kli-- hee-heeee... who can *sneee!*... wait a
minute, I *can* get through this with a straight face!

The French Language Institute rejects loan words from other languages.
The Klingon Language Institute claims useful words in the name of the
Empire.

Klingon love poetry leads to the same thing as French love poetry,
except harder and faster, and with more screaming.

The Klingon language has no "accent circonflexe."

When describing Jerry Lewis, the French use a word that roughly
translates to "genius." The same word translated into Klingon and then
back to English means "delicious."

They don't use it much, but at least the Klingon language *has* a word
for hygiene.

One is spoken by a bunch of arrogant, pathetic losers who like to
pretend they have a mighty military tradition, the other is from a TV
show.

and the Number 1 Reason the Klingon Language Is Better Than French...

The Klingon language doesn't sugarcoat food names -- if it's the
rotting liver of a cholesterol-challenged duck, that's what we call
it.

DJensen

unread,
Feb 25, 2004, 11:26:01 AM2/25/04
to
Stan Jensen wrote:

> Reasons the Klingon Language Is Better Than French

Are you retarded?

--
DJensen

Tyralak

unread,
Feb 25, 2004, 11:53:31 AM2/25/04
to
DJensen <m...@no-spam-thanks.net> wrote in news:q04%b.8309$ee3.377413
@news20.bellglobal.com:

> Stan Jensen wrote:
>
>> Reasons the Klingon Language Is Better Than French
>
> Are you retarded?
>

No, but he is pretty funny. That was actually a good list.

--
"The other thing I've learned is that all political choices are bad, and
most
are equally bad. Politics is a group of men arguing how best to carve up a
bowl of soup." - Chuck Sonnenburg


Tyralak,
Supreme Commander Of The Imperial Romulan Warbird, Psionax

Official ASVS Token Trekkie

JamesL

unread,
Feb 25, 2004, 3:14:55 PM2/25/04
to
Absolutely hilarious!

I loved it!

Thanks!

James L

"Stan Jensen" <sp...@wonderful.Spam> wrote in message
news:8agp30dsll4fs8lcs...@4ax.com...

Ragnar

unread,
Feb 25, 2004, 4:17:41 PM2/25/04
to

"DJensen" <m...@no-spam-thanks.net> wrote in message
news:q04%b.8309$ee3.3...@news20.bellglobal.com...

> Stan Jensen wrote:
>
> > Reasons the Klingon Language Is Better Than French
>
> Are you retarded?

Are you an uptight anal retentive with no sense of humor?


Pahsons - Somnolent

unread,
Feb 25, 2004, 5:12:47 PM2/25/04
to
Falling asleep through Stan Jensen's post...

> The French Language Institute rejects loan words from other languages.

Anyone know why this is? I recall something about CD-Rom being accepted
some time ago

--
http://animehistory.keenspace.com/d/20020310.html
http://www.cafeshops.com/creexul.2534632
Jhoh Al-Bec: IS THAT A LITTLE GIRL I HEAR FRANKIE?
JC: WHAT HAPPENED TO DA FUCKIN TOUGH GUY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
JC: OHH WHAT A BIG MAN YOU ARE, HEY LEMME BUY YOU A PACK OF GUM, I'LL SHOW
YOU HOW TO CHEW IT, OOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dane: Thanks for scarring me for life.
Jose Solano: For the glory of the Empire!
http://asagi.sakura.ne.jp/~walhalla/gallery/gallery_image/womb.jpg

Kweeg

unread,
Feb 25, 2004, 6:43:32 PM2/25/04
to
"Stan Jensen" <sp...@wonderful.Spam> wrote in message
news:8agp30dsll4fs8lcs...@4ax.com...
> Reasons the Klingon Language Is Better Than French

<snip funny bits>

ROTFLMFAO!!!!!
--
QaPla'
Kweeg
http://members.shaw.ca/iksbloodoath


jesus X

unread,
Feb 25, 2004, 7:19:16 PM2/25/04
to
On 2/25/2004 5:15 AM ecriva cranked up the brainbox and said:


>> Hi all, a good buddy of mine (ST fan) is wanting to have some ST influence
>> at her wedding - maybe with some music or somehow with clothing or something
>> else. She doesn't want to go over the top, just have some of it as being in
>> her wedding/reception.
>> Any one got any suggestions? I will pass them all on to her.
>> thanks!


Instead of Wagner's Wedding March, play the theme from Star Trek "First
Contact". It's got a great intro for the bride to walk out in, and then a
_beautiful_ brass/string interlude that is just made for a bride to walk down an
aisle to. Perfect for a wedding. Just make sure to cut off the last 1:34 because
that's where the discordant Borg stuff starts. It's still good however, as the
symphonic part fades out to almost silence right before that.

--
jesus X [ Booze-fueled paragon of pointless cruelty and wanton sadism. ]
email [ jesus_x @ mozillanews.org ]
web [ http://www.mozillanews.org ]
insult [ As usual, you've been a real pantload. ]
warning [ Don't touch that! You might mutate your fingers. ]

0 new messages