Assimilated Monty Python of Borg
Haynes Lee
And now for something new and completely different...
In this Voyager episode Ensign Kim in search for more shuttles visits
the Planet Anthrax.
ENSIGN KIM: Open the door!
Open the door!
[pound pound pound]
In the name of James T. Kirk, open the door!
[squeak thump]
[squeak boom]
SEVEN OF NINE: Welcome handsome Star Fleet Officer,
welcome to the Planet Anthrax.
ENSIGN KIM: The Planet Anthrax?
SEVEN OF NINE: We are but an entire Collective of female Borg,
cut off in the Great Link with no one to
assimilate us! Oh, it is a lonely life....
Oh, but your pupils are dilated!
ENSIGN KIM: No, no -- i-it's nothing!
SEVEN OF NINE: Oh, so do you wish to copulate?
Take off your clothes.
ENSIGN KIM: Well, I could stay a BIT longer.
[large knocking]
TUVOK: Ensign Kim!
ENSIGN KIM: Oh, hello.
TUVOK: Quick!
ENSIGN KIM: What?
TUVOK: Quick!
ENSIGN KIM: Why?
TUVOK: You're in great danger!
ENSIGN KIM: Look, I'm fine!
TUVOK: Come on!
ENSIGN KIM: Now look, I can tackle this Collective single-handed!
SEVEN OF NINE: Yes! Let him tackle us single-handed!
GIRLS: Yes! Tackle us single-handed!
TUVOK: No, Ensign Kim come on!
ENSIGN KIM: No, really, honestly, I can go back and
handle this Collective easily!
SEVEN OF NINE: Oh, yes, let him handle us easily.
ENSIGN KIM: Wait! I can defeat them! There's only
a hundred and fifty of them!
SEVEN OF NINE: Yes, yes, he'll beat us easily, we haven't
chance.
[slam]
SEVEN OF NINE: Oh, shazbot!
[outside]
TUVOK: We were in the nick of time, you were just about
to get assimilated.
ENSIGN KIM: I don't think I was.
TUVOK: Yes you were, you were just about to get assimilated
by the Borg.
ENSIGN KIM: Look, let me go back in there and face the Borg.
TUVOK: No, there are too many Borg.
ENSIGN KIM: Look, I can handle as smuch Borg as I can.
TUVOK: No, we've got to find more shuttles. Come on!
ENSIGN KIM: Well, let me have just a little bit of Borg?
TUVOK: No, it's unhealthy.
ENSIGN KIM: Bet you're gay!
TUVOK: No, I'm not.
------------------------------------------
Assimilated Monty Pyhton page
http://www1.kingston.net/ik/lee/borg.html
Slid...@wormhole.com
In that Monty Python movie all the girls were begging to be spanked! Oh if
only it.........happened....oh boy...oh boy.....woooooooooooooo...............
Steven S. Palmer <spu...@gte.net>
http://home1.gte.net/sputers/index.html
http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Spa/4001/
--------------------------------------------------
NASCAR FAN............
Sit down,Strap in,Shut up,Hang on,Go fast,Turn left,,,
Kiss Trophy Girl
Go,Go,Go,Go,Go #6,88,2,99,5,3,28,18
ST
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We are the drones who say "Ni!"
>
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We are the drones who say "Ni!"
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Mark
ST wrote:
>
> We are the drones who say "Ni!"
>
>
>
>
>
That would really kill of the Borg then. Monty Python is stupid!
The Raptor
Be careful, you tread peoples feet. Don't insult Monty Python.
--
Michael Varner
444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444
44444444444444444444 http://www.siue.edu/~mvarner 4444444444444444444
4444444444444444 http://www.angelfire.com/ok/keg1997 4444444444444444
444444444444444444444 May the fours be with you. 44444444444444444444
444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444
Grail
That's patently ridiculous. What would the Borg want with....
A SHRUBBERY!!!
--
//== //==\\ ||~~~~|| || || u4...@keele.ac.uk
|| ||==||===// ||====|| || ||
\\===|| || \\ || || || \\====
"Hold it now. You know the rules. You don't ask for it. You fight for it.
Which is why we Bundys may be maladjusted but we are strong."
-Al Bundy, "Married with Children" ('Every Bundy Has a Birthday')
LYONS
In article <622jhj$js6$3...@cfs2.kis.keele.ac.uk>, u4...@keele.ac.uk says...
> That's patently ridiculous. What would the Borg want with....
>
> A SHRUBBERY!!!
>
> --
Brian Barjenbruch
> NI!
NOO!
Brian
Brian Barjenbruch
> That's patently ridiculous. What would the Borg want with....
>
> A SHRUBBERY!!!
We shall do no such thing!
Brian
LYONS
In article <brianb1-1510...@cx31002-a.omhaw1.ne.home.com>,
bri...@home.com says...
> > NI!
>
> NOO!
>
> Brian
>
NI! NI! NI! SHRUBURI!
Johnny Lamar Rhyne
In <34440C...@maquis.com> Mark <mkli...@maquis.com> writes:
>
>ST wrote:
>>
>> We are the drones who say "Ni!"
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>
>That would really kill of the Borg then. Monty Python is stupid!
I fart in you'r general direction.
--
Mr. H.R. Bradshaw(Deceased)
Head Minister, Ministry of Silly Walks
*Is your life in a rut? Then head down
to your local silly walks recruiter today.*
Join now and we will send you a free Shrubbery.
Mark
The Raptor wrote:
>
> Be careful, you tread peoples feet. Don't insult Monty Python.
> Mark wrote:
> >
> >
> > We are the drones who say "Ni!"
> > > That would really kill of the Borg then. Monty Python is stupid!
>
Why should I care about Monty! If I fall asleep in his films, you know
they are boring. I don't care if this is posted to monty's newsgroup. I
say again, he is stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mark
LYONS
In article <01bcd9cd$214c41a0$e1580c26@veritas>, tetde...@hotmail.com
says...
>
> > > Why should I care about Monty! If I fall asleep in his films, you know
> > > they are boring. I don't care if this is posted to monty's newsgroup. I
> > > say again, he is stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> > >
> > > Mark
> > >
> >
> > - Lyons
>
> Apparently, he fell asleep during the previews.
>
I'd say you're right. Aren't there new treatments for Narcolepsy?
LYONS
In article <344515...@maquis.com>, mkli...@maquis.com says...
> The Raptor wrote:
> >
> > Be careful, you tread peoples feet. Don't insult Monty Python.
> > Mark wrote:
> > >
> > > ST wrote:
> > >
> > > We are the drones who say "Ni!"
> > > > That would really kill of the Borg then. Monty Python is stupid!
> >
>
Victor Marshall
Mark wrote:
>
> ST wrote:
> >
> > We are the drones who say "Ni!"
>
> That would really kill of the Borg then. Monty Python is stupid!
No they're not!
By the way, did you pay for the five minute argument?
<grin>
VM
Theflinx
> > Why should I care about Monty! If I fall asleep in his films, you know
> > they are boring. I don't care if this is posted to monty's newsgroup. I
> > say again, he is stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> >
> > Mark
> >
> HIS films?
>
> - Lyons
Apparently, he fell asleep during the previews.
GeyerChris
>
>Apparently, he fell asleep during the previews.
>
>
we apologize for the sudden attack of the supporting feature...
The Raptor
> The Raptor wrote:
> >
> > Be careful, you tread peoples feet. Don't insult Monty Python.
> > >
> > > ST wrote:
> > >
> > > We are the drones who say "Ni!"
> > > > That would really kill of the Borg then. Monty Python is stupid!
> >
>
> they are boring. I don't care if this is posted to monty's newsgroup. I
> say again, he is stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>
> Mark
If you are going to insult something, at least try to understand what it
is before you attack it. I really get mad when I hear all you dumbasses
talking about Monty Python as if they were one person. Get a clue!
Jerry
I am Monty Pythonicus of Borg. Resistence is futile. You humor and
jokes will be asorbed into the collective. <attacks with laser
guided trout>
ALBATROS!!!!
The_Pope
LYONS wrote:
> In article <344515...@maquis.com>, mkli...@maquis.com says...
> > The Raptor wrote:
> > >
> > > Be careful, you tread peoples feet. Don't insult Monty Python.
> > > Mark wrote:
> > > >
> > > > ST wrote:
> > > >
> > > > We are the drones who say "Ni!"
> > > > > That would really kill of the Borg then. Monty Python is
> stupid!
> > >
> >
> > Why should I care about Monty! If I fall asleep in his films, you
> know
> > they are boring. I don't care if this is posted to monty's
> newsgroup. I
> > say again, he is stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> >
> > Mark
> >
> HIS films?
Yet another person who believes Monty Python is a real person. Pity.
Eee ecki thump!
Gryphon
Jerry wrote:
Can I just say that this is the first time I've ever been assimilated?
Joe We are Borg
rly...@bigfoot.com (LYONS) writes:
> In article <01bcd9cd$214c41a0$e1580c26@veritas>, tetde...@hotmail.com
> says...
> >
> > > > Why should I care about Monty! If I fall asleep in his films, you know
> > > > they are boring. I don't care if this is posted to monty's newsgroup. I
> > > > say again, he is stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> > > >
> > > > Mark
> > > >
> > > HIS films?
> > >
> > > - Lyons
> >
> > Apparently, he fell asleep during the previews.
> >
> I'd say you're right. Aren't there new treatments for Narcolepsy?
Yes. One must chop at his neck with... A HERRING!
--
Joe Foster <mailto:joe*AT*bftsi0.gate.net> Spam is irrelevant. Assimilate this:
<ftp://ftp.microsoft.com/softlib/index.txt> Microsoft's master patch list
<ftp://ftp.microsoft.com/softlib/mslfiles/> MS I got yer patch right here!
<http://www.microsoft.com/kb/default.asp> MS Knowledge Base
<http://www.dejanews.com> Usenet search and archival engine
<http://www.altavista.digital.com> WWW *and* Usenet search engine
WARNING: I cannot be held responsible for the above They're coming to
because my cats have apparently learned to type. take me away, ha ha!
Brian Barjenbruch
No, I'm afraid you can't, we haven't got time. Now we're just about to
get another result...might be from Leicester or from Luton...I'm just
getting a loud buzzing noise in my left ear...excuse me a moment...
Brian
The Raptor
Ken Nielsen wrote:
>
> Gryphon wrote:
> >
> > Jerry wrote:
> >
> > > I am Monty Pythonicus of Borg. Resistence is futile. You humor and
> > > jokes will be asorbed into the collective. <attacks with laser
> > > guided trout>
> > > ALBATROS!!!!
> >
> > Can I just say that this is the first time I've ever been assimilated?
>
> Captain Kirk who is about to apply for a fish license.
And while he's at it, he'll attempt to get a license for his pet
tribble, Eric.
>
> Ken Ni- elsen
Patrick J. Murphy
bri...@home.com (Brian Barjenbruch) wrote:
>> > I am Monty Pythonicus of Borg. Resistence is futile. You humor and
>> > jokes will be asorbed into the collective. <attacks with laser
>> > guided trout>
>> > ALBATROS!!!!
>>
>> Can I just say that this is the first time I've ever been assimilated?
>No, I'm afraid you can't, we haven't got time. Now we're just about to
>get another result...might be from Leicester or from Luton...I'm just
>getting a loud buzzing noise in my left ear...excuse me a moment...
It's 9 o'clock, and time for the penguin on top of your television to
be assimilated.
******************************************************************
I don't trust birds. If God had meant for birds to fly, He'd
have given them brains sophisticated enough to design an airplane.
Brian Barjenbruch
> It's 9 o'clock, and time for the penguin on top of your television to
> be assimilated.
How did you know that was going to happen?
Brian
plut...@eng.sun.com
>
>Why should I care about Monty! If I fall asleep in his films, you know
>they are boring. I don't care if this is posted to monty's newsgroup. I
>say again, he is stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>
>Mark
You actually believe that Monty Python is a person, don't you?
Johnny Lamar Rhyne
In <3446E8B4...@geocities.com> Gryphon
<gryph...@geocities.com> writes:
>Jerry wrote:
>
>> I am Monty Pythonicus of Borg. Resistence is futile. You humor and
>> jokes will be asorbed into the collective. <attacks with laser
>> guided trout>
>> ALBATROS!!!!
>
> Can I just say that this is the first time I've ever been
assimilated?
>
My hovercraft is full of borg.
If I said you had beauitful implants, would you hold againest me? I
am no longer assimilated.
I will not buy this cube ship, it is scratched.
Brian Barjenbruch
> >> > Can I just say that this is the first time I've ever been assimilated?
> >>
> >> Captain Kirk who is about to apply for a fish license.
> >And while he's at it, he'll attempt to get a license for his pet
> >tribble, Eric.
> >>
> all too dead.
He must be a looney.
Brian
Stesal
Mark wrote:
>
> The Raptor wrote:
> >
> > Be careful, you tread peoples feet. Don't insult Monty Python.
> > Mark wrote:
> > >
> > > ST wrote:
> > >
> > > We are the drones who say "Ni!"
> > > > That would really kill of the Borg then. Monty Python is stupid!
> >
>
> they are boring. I don't care if this is posted to monty's newsgroup. I
> say again, he is stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>
> Mark
You silly sod! Monty Python is a THEM, not an it! I've soiled me armor
I was so mad. Ya manky Scotts get. Go on Boors, chop his head off.
Ken Nielsen
Gryphon wrote:
>
> Jerry wrote:
>
> > I am Monty Pythonicus of Borg. Resistence is futile. You humor and
> > jokes will be asorbed into the collective. <attacks with laser
> > guided trout>
> > ALBATROS!!!!
>
No, I'm sorry. There isn't time, we've got to go over to Luton to
Captain Kirk who is about to apply for a fish license.
Ken Ni- elsen
sdfsd
In article <627qbh$qja$1...@lynx.unm.edu>, pmu...@unm.edu (Patrick J.
Murphy) wrote:
> bri...@home.com (Brian Barjenbruch) wrote:
>
> >> > I am Monty Pythonicus of Borg. Resistence is futile. You humor and
> >> > jokes will be asorbed into the collective. <attacks with laser
> >> > guided trout>
> >> > ALBATROS!!!!
> >>
> >> Can I just say that this is the first time I've ever been assimilated?
>
> >No, I'm afraid you can't, we haven't got time. Now we're just about to
> >get another result...might be from Leicester or from Luton...I'm just
> >getting a loud buzzing noise in my left ear...excuse me a moment...
>
> It's 9 o'clock, and time for the penguin on top of your television to
> be assimilated.
>
"OOh, now how'd know that was going to happen?"
"Simple madam, You have already been assimilated - BY A HERRING!
John Anglin
>> > Can I just say that this is the first time I've ever been assimilated?
>>
>> Captain Kirk who is about to apply for a fish license.
>tribble, Eric.
>>
He chose him out of thousands. He didn't like the others; they were
all too dead.
Analda aka Jim! This lumberjack is a Klingon!
ana...@hiwaay.net
Bddrome
you're a jackass ok so get a life
Chris Andersen
The_Pope <po...@lcc.net> wrote:
>> > Why should I care about Monty! If I fall asleep in his films, you
>> know
>> > they are boring. I don't care if this is posted to monty's
>> newsgroup. I
>> > say again, he is stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>> >
>> > Mark
>> >
>> HIS films?
>
>Yet another person who believes Monty Python is a real person. Pity.
"Oh by the way, which ones Pink?" -- "Wish You Were Here?", Pink Floyd
Mark Rowan
Mark (mkli...@maquis.com) wrote:
:
: Why should I care about Monty! If I fall asleep in his films, you know
: they are boring. I don't care if this is posted to monty's newsgroup. I
: say again, he is stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:
: Mark
Hello everyone. I'm Mark Rowan, perhaps better known to most of you as
Sir-Not Stacy Campbell or The Minister for Not Being Ronda Lewis.
I'm speaking to you today on behalf of Marks the world over who aren't
hopelessly stupid prats. No, no, wait, that'll get me flamed. Um, ...Marks
the world over what know the difference between one person and six very
talented men.
Anyway, the point here is that I personally know Monty Python is more than
one person. I would assume there are other persons named "Mark" who also
know this. Please, don't assume that everyone named Mark is stupid, with
the great new taste of fish.
Oh, sorry. We can edit that out, can't we?
Mark Rowan AKA I already typed em out once
--
###################################################################
# Mark "Polarity Boy" Rowan mro...@arches.uga.edu #
# #
# "Cigarette?" "Yes, I know." - Police Squad #
###################################################################
Jonathan
Chris Andersen wrote:
> >Yet another person who believes Monty Python is a real person. Pity.
>
> "Oh by the way, which ones Pink?" -- "Wish You Were Here?", Pink Floyd
<g> I hear Jethro Tull's getting back together with his wife Marilyn
Manson.
I bet she's a goer. SAY NO MORE!!!!
--
remove: nospam to reply
Kenneth Rochel de Camargo Jr.
Victor Marshall wrote in message
<34462F...@svl.ems.spamCookie.lmco.com>...
>(LOL) Good one.
>Same thing for people who say "Led Zeppelin, he's ok". What do they
>think? Do they think Mr and Mrs Zeppelin had a baby and named it "Led"?
>I say once again, there should be an intelligence test attached to
>people's voting ballots... if you miss seven out of ten questions then
>your vote counts as three tenths of a vote.
>VM
What's the matter? I've heard that little Led is dating Mrs. Floyd (married
to Pink) daughter, and they'll ask Mr. Stone (Rolling, Oliver's brother) to
be the best man.
AntiJohn
Stesal <cla...@sunline.net> wrote:
>Mark wrote:
>>
>> The Raptor wrote:
>> >
>> > Be careful, you tread peoples feet. Don't insult Monty Python.
>> > Mark wrote:
>> > >
>> > > ST wrote:
>> > >
>> > > We are the drones who say "Ni!"
>> > > > That would really kill of the Borg then. Monty Python is stupid!
>> Why should I care about Monty! If I fall asleep in his films, you know
>> they are boring. I don't care if this is posted to monty's newsgroup. I
>> say again, he is stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>
>> Mark
>You silly sod! Monty Python is a THEM, not an it! I've soiled me armor
>I was so mad. Ya manky Scotts get. Go on Boors, chop his head off.
Ok. Who swung that axe? Who did it? "It was me" To the end of the
line! There's always one.
Are there any women in the collective? <high pitched voices> No. No.
No no no. <lower pitched> No. no no no no.
Brian Barjenbruch
> Ok. Who swung that axe? Who did it? "It was me" To the end of the
> line! There's always one.
>
> Are there any women in the collective? <high pitched voices> No. No.
> No no no. <lower pitched> No. no no no no.
No one is to assimilate anyone until I blow this whistle! Even if--and I
want to make this absolutely clear--even if they DO say Borg.
Brian
Johnny Lamar Rhyne
In <344B5DEC...@lufysik.fysik.lu.se> Kent Persson
<ke...@lufysik.fysik.lu.se> writes:
>
>>
>>
>> My hovercraft is full of borg.
>>
>> If I said you had beauitful implants, would you hold againest
me? I
>> am no longer assimilated.
>>
>> I will not buy this cube ship, it is scratched.
>> --
>>
>> Mr. H.R. Bradshaw(Deceased)
>> Head Minister, Ministry of Silly Walks
>> *Is your life in a rut? Then head down
>> to your local silly walks recruiter today.*
>>
>> Join now and we will send you a free Shrubbery.
>
>
I'm sorry, but that is the Borg-Hungarian phrase book.
For example, the Hungarian phrase "Could you direct me to the
Federation?" is hereby translated by the Borg phrase "Please fondle my
implants".
>
>Blig. Chalres. Anne-Erisabeth Erdelbelly
>MP Sirry Palty, OBE, Ph.D. (mls)
Brian Barjenbruch
> >"He?" It's a GROUP!!! Don't post to this group if you hate Python, or
> else
> >I'll send the Hell's Grannies after you, and some vicious keep left
> signs
> >to boot!
>
> You must also send The Baby Snatchers.
Right! Stop that! It's silly. Very silly indeed. It started off as a
nice little idea about old Borg assimilating young men, and now it's just
got silly! His hair's too long for a Borg too. And you can tell those
are not proper keep-left cubes. Clear off the lot of you!
Now let's have something decent and military. Some precision assimilating.
COLLECTIVE! CAMP IT---UP!
Ooh, get her!
Whoops! I've got your number, duckie, you couldn't assimilate me dear,
two three.
I'd scratch your implants out.
Don't come the Borg bit with us dear,
We all know where you've been, you military Borg queen.
Two, three, four, one, two, three, four, five, six.
Whoops! Don't look now drones, the Borg has just beamed in with that
jolly colour sergeant, two three.
OOH!
Brian
Gregg Eshelman
In article <62dhok$10o$1...@puma.unisys.com.br>, kcam...@NOT.unisys.com.br
says...
Jerry
In article <62hkdj$b...@dfw-ixnews9.ix.netcom.com>,
crh...@ix.netcom.com(Johnny Lamar Rhyne) wrote:
>In <brianb1-2010...@cx31002-a.omhaw1.ne.home.com>
>
>
>
>> Brian
>
All your mindless blather is futile! Right! Get on with the
assimilation!
Gryphon
Gregg Eshelman wrote:
Yeah, I hear Lynyrd is rooming with his old friends the Doobie Brothers,
Joe and Lou.
Gryphon
Johnny Lamar Rhyne wrote:
> In <344B5DEC...@lufysik.fysik.lu.se> Kent Persson
> <ke...@lufysik.fysik.lu.se> writes:
> >
> >>
> >>
> >> My hovercraft is full of borg.
> >>
> >> If I said you had beauitful implants, would you hold againest
> me? I
> >> am no longer assimilated.
> >>
> >> I will not buy this cube ship, it is scratched.
> >> --
> >>
> >> Mr. H.R. Bradshaw(Deceased)
> >> Head Minister, Ministry of Silly Walks
> >> *Is your life in a rut? Then head down
> >> to your local silly walks recruiter today.*
> >>
> >> Join now and we will send you a free Shrubbery.
> >
> >
> >If you have a Klingon-Hugarian Phrase book please post it.
>
> I'm sorry, but that is the Borg-Hungarian phrase book.
>
> For example, the Hungarian phrase "Could you direct me to the
> Federation?" is hereby translated by the Borg phrase "Please fondle my
>
> implants".
>
>
The borg phrase "resistance is futile" has been translated as "I will
not buy William Shatner's wig, it is scratched."
Kent Persson
Gryphon wrote:
> Johnny Lamar Rhyne wrote:
>
>
> > >If you have a Klingon-Hugarian Phrase book please post it.
> >
> > I'm sorry, but that is the Borg-Hungarian phrase book.
> >
> > For example, the Hungarian phrase "Could you direct me to the
> > Federation?" is hereby translated by the Borg phrase "Please fondle my
> >
> > implants".
> >
> >
>
> The borg phrase "resistance is futile" has been translated as "I will
> not buy William Shatner's wig, it is scratched."
Borg? Sounds Swedish.
Here are some Borg-Swedish phrases:
"resistance is futile" - Min borg-kub är full med ålar.
"you will be assimilated" - Jag tänker inte använda min hårddisk, den är
repig.
"I Borg" - Björn Borg sniffar mittlinje.
Do you have a klingon-borg-semprini phrase book?
Brig. Andrew Stephen Carol-Anne Ellis
MP Sensible Party OBE, Ph.D. etc (mrs)
Victor Marshall
Brian Barjenbruch wrote:
>
<snip>
> Right! Stop that! It's silly. Very silly indeed. It started off as a
> nice little idea about old Borg assimilating young men, and now it's just
> got silly! His hair's too long for a Borg too. And you can tell those
> are not proper keep-left cubes. Clear off the lot of you!
>
> Now let's have something decent and military. Some precision assimilating.
>
> Brian
Oh WE assimilate and we're ok
we sleep all night and we work all day...
VM
Andrew C Easterly
Worse? How could it possibly Be worse?? BORG! BORG!!! BORG!!!
A. Easterly
SILS student
206b Clinton Hall, UB
"I find your lack of faith disturbing."
"Mudhole? Slimy? My home this is!"
Andrew C Easterly
You have beautiful energy nodes.
7 of 9 assimilates with delight!!!
Enoch Forrester
On Thu, 23 Oct 1997, Victor Marshall wrote:
> Brian Barjenbruch wrote:
> > Right! Stop that! It's silly. Very silly indeed. It started off as a
> > nice little idea about old Borg assimilating young men, and now it's just
> > got silly! His hair's too long for a Borg too. And you can tell those
> > are not proper keep-left cubes. Clear off the lot of you!
> > Now let's have something decent and military. Some precision assimilating.
> Oh WE assimilate and we're ok
> we sleep all night and we work all day...
The following words will not be used again in this thread:
B*RG
*SS*M*LATE
*MPL*NTS
SEMPRINI
/-------------------------------------------------------------------------\
| % Katie opens % ** Kevin Eric Snell ** % the kitchen sash % |
| "Pets are always a great help in times of stress. And in times of |
| starvation, too o' course."--Dibbler ("Voyager! Fools!"--Cap. Braxton) |
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------/
ST
Gryphon wrote:
> Andrew C Easterly wrote:
>
> > Worse? How could it possibly Be worse?? BORG! BORG!!! BORG!!!
> >
>
> Luxury! When I was a child we had to get up at 3 am, eat a lump of
> cold
> poison and walk thirteen miles in the snow to be assimilated! Now
> you've
> got every Bruce and Eric in the world getting assimilated all
> willy-nilly!
I said, one of the conduits has gone out on warp core. I didn't
expect the bloody Borg Assimilation!
Graham Kennedy
Jim O'Donnell wrote:
> surprise and fear, and those things that come out of the wrists --
> I'll
> come in again.
>
> --Jim
Amongst our weapons are... surprise, fear, ruthless determination,
an almost fanatical devotion to the collective, and nice black
leather uniforms - oh damn!
--
Graham Kennedy
William Burns
ST <sharah...@zd.com> wrote:
> I said, one of the conduits has gone out on warp core. I didn't
>expect the bloody Borg Assimilation!
Nobody expects the Borg . . . Drat! Too late. I told you it was the
Number 9 bus.
--William
A man said to the universe,
"Sir, I exist!"
"However," replied the universe,
"The fact has not created in me
A sense of obligation." (Stephen Crane)
Kent Persson
Victor Marshall wrote:
> ST wrote:
> >
> > NOBODY EXPECTS THE BORG ASSIMILATION!!!!
>
> VM
There is only one thing worse than being assimilated, that is not to be
assimilated.
- Oscar Wilde (mrs)
Oh I wish I didn't write that!
Brig Stephen Anne-Jennifer-Caroline Ellis
MP (Sensible Party) OBE, Ph.D. etc (miss)
Andrew C Easterly
Stop that, silly. This all started out as a nice mix of Borg, star trek
and Monty Python, but now you've added the Muppets! Silly!
(Miss Piggy storms in and hits Colonel with her classic karate chop)
A. Easterly
SILS student
206b Clinton Hall, UB
"I find your lack of faith disturbing."
"Mudhole? Slimy? My home this is!"
On Tue, 28 Oct 1997 cc...@worldnet.att.net wrote:
> Andrew C Easterly wrote:
> >
> > Worse? How could it possibly Be worse?? BORG! BORG!!! BORG!!!
>
> Don't you mean "bork! bork! bork!"?
>
> LouAnne
>
>
Coach
In article <3455CA48...@lufysik.fysik.lu.se>, Kent Persson
<ke...@lufysik.fysik.lu.se> wrote:
> Victor Marshall wrote:
>
> > ST wrote:
> > >
> > > NOBODY EXPECTS THE BORG ASSIMILATION!!!!
> >
> > VM
>
>
> There is only one thing worse than being assimilated, that is not to be
> assimilated.
>
> - Oscar Wilde (mrs)
>
> Oh I wish I didn't write that!
Oh, you did, chap, you did.
/Coach
ST
Dear Sir,
I would like to complain about all of those jokes about the
assimiltation. I've been a Borg for over 20 years and I've never worn a
dress. And neither has my wife.
Yours truly,
Brigadier Sir Charles Arthur Strong (Mrs.)
ST
The Crew quotes Python
Chakotay: I would like to announce that I am, in fact, made entirely of
wood.
Nelix: I use an aftershave called Rancid Polecat. It leaves my skin
nice and scaly.
Janeway: I'm tired of all this sex on the television. I mean...wait,
what sex?
Paris: If I could walk that way I wouldn't need aftershave.
Nelix: I mean, be fair! I don't eat squirrels do I . Well, only if
they're Balmorian. And in a nice white sauce. But who's it hurting?
Doctor: All right, who's got the pox?
>
Brian Barjenbruch
> Dear Sir,
>
> I would like to complain about all of those jokes about the
> assimiltation. I've been a Borg for over 20 years and I've never worn a
> dress. And neither has my wife.
>
> Yours truly,
>
> Brigadier Sir Charles Arthur Strong (Mrs.)
>
> Andrew C Easterly wrote:
Dear Sir,
When I was in the collective I was assimilated every 30 minutes and
it never did me any harm, except for implant maladjustment and blurred
vision. Sincerely, Flight Lt. Ken Borgenstein.
Dear Sir,
I object strongly to letters in the collective. They are clearly not
written by the general drone public and are merely included for a cheap
assimiliation. Yours etc., William Knickers.
Dear Sir,
I object to being objected to by the last letter, before my
assimilation has become apparent.
Brian
Jerry
>MP (Sensible Party) OBE, Ph.D. etc (miss)
>
>
>
-Jerry of Snorg.
dammit I think I need to be reassimilated, I'm getting this all
wronge!
Timmins William Anthony
Indeed,
You puerile oik. [or should that be oink]
You are a vacuous toffee-nosed malodorous pervert! Take your finger our of
your sphincter.
I formally abuse you,
In article <Pine.GSO.3.96.97102...@hercules.acsu.buffalo.edu>,
Andrew C Easterly <east...@acsu.buffalo.edu> wrote:
>Stop that, silly. This all started out as a nice mix of Borg, star trek
>and Monty Python, but now you've added the Muppets! Silly!
>
>(Miss Piggy storms in and hits Colonel with her classic karate chop)
>
>A. Easterly
>SILS student
>206b Clinton Hall, UB
>
>"I find your lack of faith disturbing."
>
>"Mudhole? Slimy? My home this is!"
>
>On Tue, 28 Oct 1997 cc...@worldnet.att.net wrote:
>
>> Andrew C Easterly wrote:
>> >
>> > Worse? How could it possibly Be worse?? BORG! BORG!!! BORG!!!
>>
>> Don't you mean "bork! bork! bork!"?
>>
>> LouAnne
>>
>>
>
--
_______________________________________________________________________
/ <*> I'll design a proper signature real soon /
/__/ . / /_ _/ BillT mailto:t...@np.ac.sg http://www.np.ac.sg/~twa /
/__/_/_/_/ _/__________________________________________________________/
ST
Well that's just the sort of blinkard, phillistine, pig-ignorance I've
come to expect of you drones. You sit around on your loathesome, metal
behinds squeezing blackheads-- and don't give a tinker's cuss about the
struggling sentient. You excrement! You whining hypocritical toadies
with your regenerations and your bleeding drone hand implants! You
wouldn't assimilate me, would you, you blackballing bastards! Well I
wouldn't become a Borg drone now if you got down on your rotten,
stinking, pugnulent knees and begged me!
Timmins William Anthony wrote:
> Indeed,
> You puerile oik. [or should that be oink]
> You are a vacuous toffee-nosed malodorous pervert! Take your finger
> our of
> your sphincter.
>
> I formally abuse you,
>
>
Brian Barjenbruch
> Well that's just the sort of blinkard, phillistine, pig-ignorance I've
> come to expect of you drones. You sit around on your loathesome, metal
> behinds squeezing blackheads-- and don't give a tinker's cuss about the
> struggling sentient. You excrement! You whining hypocritical toadies
> with your regenerations and your bleeding drone hand implants! You
> wouldn't assimilate me, would you, you blackballing bastards! Well I
> wouldn't become a Borg drone now if you got down on your rotten,
> stinking, pugnulent knees and begged me!
Well I'm sorry you feel like that, but we did want a Borg cube of flats.
Nice though the abattoir is.
Brian
Victor Marshall
Timmins William Anthony wrote:
>
> Indeed,
> You puerile oik. [or should that be oink]
> You are a vacuous toffee-nosed malodorous pervert! Take your finger our of
> your sphincter.
>
> I formally abuse you,
>
But I paid for an ARGUMENT!
VM
bemean
The Raptor <mva...@siue.edu> skrev i inlägg
<345737...@siue.edu>...
: I would just like to say that there is no assimilation in the Royal
Star
: Fleet, and by none, I mean quite a lot.
: --
: Michael Varner
:
444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444
: 44444444444444444444 http://www.siue.edu/~mvarner
4444444444444444444
: 4444444444444444 http://www.angelfire.com/ok/keg1997
4444444444444444
: 444444444444444444444 May the fours be with you.
44444444444444444444
:
444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444
:
***************
Do ya wanto have this ng 4 yaself?
;-) ;-) ;-)
bemean
--
he who haha last, hahahad best!
If replyin´ remove "nospam"
Brian Barjenbruch
> > I've assimilated you once.
> >
> > Brian
> >
> No you haven't
Yes I have. Look, I'm sorry, but I'm not allowed to assimilate you unless
you've paid.
Brian
Brian Barjenbruch
> I would just like to say that there is no assimilation in the Royal Star
> Fleet, and by none, I mean quite a lot.
Still no sign of the collective...how long is it?
Brian
Theflinx
Brian Barjenbruch <bri...@home.com> wrote in article
<brianb1-2910...@cx31002-a.omhaw1.ne.home.com>...
This is not assimilation, it's contradiction
cc...@worldnet.att.net
Theflinx wrote:
> Brian Barjenbruch wrote:
> > > > I've assimilated you once.
> > > >
> >
> > Yes I have. Look, I'm sorry, but I'm not allowed to assimilate you
> unless
> > you've paid.
>
No, it's not.
LouAnne
Brian Barjenbruch
> But I paid for an ARGUMENT!
I've assimilated you once.
Brian
cc...@worldnet.att.net
> > > This is not assimilation, it's contradiction
> >
> > No, it's not.
>
> automatic gainsaying of whatever the other person has to assimilate.
>
Look, I assimilate you, I must take a contarary position!
Brian Barjenbruch
> > > But I paid for an ARGUMENT!
> >
> > I've assimilated you once.
> >
> > Brian
>
Well, I'm very sorry, but you didn't pay for the assimilation.
Brian
Ken Nielsen
Brian Barjenbruch <bri...@home.com> skrev i artiklen
<brianb1-2910...@cx31002-a.omhaw1.ne.home.com>...
That's a rather personal question, sir!
"HOW TO RECOGNIZE BORGS FROM A LONG WAY AWAY"
Number 1: The drone
The drone
The drone
Ken Ni-elsen
Kent Persson
Geri wrote:
> In article <3455CA48...@lufysik.fysik.lu.se>,
> Kent Persson <ke...@lufysik.fysik.lu.se> wrote:
> >
> >
>
SNUPP
> >
> >There is only one thing worse than being assimilated, that is not to
> be
> >assimilated.
> >
> >- Oscar Wilde (mrs)
> >
> >Oh I wish I didn't write that!
> >
> >Brig Stephen Anne-Jennifer-Caroline Ellis
> >MP (Sensible Party) OBE, Ph.D. etc (miss)
> >
> >
> >
> All for the collective, The collective for all.
>
Another Oscar Wilde Quote:
There is only one thing worse than being assimilated by a borg, that is
be assimilated by yourself.
Brig. Stephen Anne-Mohammed El-Sayed
(granddaughter of Jean-Luc Picard and Lt. Worf)
MP Sensible Party OBE Ph.D. etc. (mrs)
"It is better to be rich and happy than poor and unhappy." - Unknown
Oliver D Jones
Andrew C Easterly wrote:
> "I find your lack of faith disturbing."
Naaah. I prefer: "Apology accepted, Captain Needa."
> "Mudhole? Slimy? My home this is!"
Try not. Do. Or do not. There is no try! ;-)
<Grins!>
Oliver.
Brian Barjenbruch
> Ah HAH!! Well if I didn't pay, why are you assimilating me??? Ah
> HAAAAAAHHH!
>
> Gotcha!
I could be assimilating in my spare time.
Brian
lyons
In article <3458e668...@news.hol.gr>, (rev)@hol.gr (Basil Revelas)
says...
> Can I be assimilated too? Please? Please? Pretty please?
>
No. Instance is futile.
bemean
Gregg Eshelman <eshe...@cyberhighway.net> skrev i inlägg
<MPG.ec1ebcd1...@news.cyberhighway.net>...
: In article <634vfg$h...@bgtnsc01.worldnet.att.net>,
cc...@worldnet.att.net
: says...
: > Andrew C Easterly wrote:
: > >
: > > Worse? How could it possibly Be worse?? BORG! BORG!!! BORG!!!
: >
: > Don't you mean "bork! bork! bork!"?
: >
: > LouAnne
: >
: Borg? Sounds Swedish!
:
**************
Borg? Swedish? Ja, we got some named Borg among the snow. And there
is one named
Björn Borg, famous tennisplayer, he was swedish once upon a time. I
donow where he is now adays, he sells underwear from Italy, and has
snow in the nose!
bemean
--
he who has nothing miss anything
If replyin´ remove "nospam"
Brian Barjenbruch
> This Borg is dead. You've sold me a dead Borg and I will not stand
> for it.
It's not dead. It's regenerating.
Brian
Brian Connors
In article <brianb1-2910...@cx31002-a.omhaw1.ne.home.com>,
bri...@home.com (Brian Barjenbruch) wrote:
> > I would just like to say that there is no assimilation in the Royal Star
> > Fleet, and by none, I mean quite a lot.
>
> Still no sign of the collective...how long is it?
That's a personal question, isn't it?
/Coach
_______________________________________________________________
This message has come from the O'Neill Computing Facility
at Boston College. Please responde directly to the person(s)
sending the message. To address any problems or misuse, please
email ocf...@bc.edu or help....@bc.edu
Jerry
In article <brianb1-2910...@cx31002-a.omhaw1.ne.home.com>,
bri...@home.com (Brian Barjenbruch) wrote:
Ken Nielsen
bemean <NOSPAM...@gaia.swipnet.se> skrev i artiklen <
> Björn Borg, famous tennisplayer, he was swedish once upon a time. I
> donow where he is now adays, he sells underwear from Italy, and has
> snow in the nose!
>
Snow in the nose???
Now THAT is silly....
Ken Nielsen
Assimilation is easy, comedy is hard
Brian Barjenbruch
You assimilated Kenny! YOU BASTARDS!
Brian
Brian Barjenbruch
> "HOW TO RECOGNIZE BORGS FROM A LONG WAY AWAY"
>
> Number 1: The drone
>
> The drone
>
> The drone
This is F.G. Superman of Borg. Apparently no different from any other
Borg drone. But at any time he is ready to become...BORGCYCLE REPAIRMAN!
Brian
Brian Barjenbruch
> Stop that, silly. This all started out as a nice mix of Borg, star trek
> and Monty Python, but now you've added the Muppets! Silly!
His hair's too long for a Borg drone too. And you can tell those are not
proper Assimilate Left signs. Clear off the lot of you!
Brian
Kent Persson
Gregg Eshelman wrote:
> Uh, your Queen, is she, uh, is she a goer?
> Know what I mean? Nudge, nudge, wink-OUCH!
This is beginning to look like the 'longest thread ever'...
Brig. Jean-Luc-Luc-Luc-Luc-Pierre-Luc-Luc-Luc-Luc-Luc-Luc-Jaques Picard
MP, OBE, Ph.D, etc (mrs)
From ST 'first contact'
Borges eunt domus - Picard wrote on the enterprise.
Borg#71: - "People call the borgs they go the house?"
-"No. It says Borgs go home!"
Brian Barjenbruch
> Now THAT is silly....
This is a frightened collective. Over these power couplings, over these
conduits, hangs a pall of fear. Yes, it's gangs of old ladies
assimilating fit, defenseless young men.
What are they in it for, these old Borg drones, these senile delinquents?
Brian
Theflinx
'ello 'ello 'ello what's all this 'ere thing then?
Inspector Woopiecushion of Starfleet security here, This thread has gotten
entirely too silly- it's very silly indeed and I'm going to put a stop to
it right now.
That's everybody out, nothing to see here, go back to your homes it's all
over!
Brian Barjenbruch
> Behind this shrubbery is Mr. 3 of 5 of the Collective....
> He is trying not to be seen..
>
> Will you stand up please mr. 3 of 5?
>
> KABOOOOOOOOOM
This demonstrates the value of not being assimilated.
In this collective we cannot see Ms. 7 of 9 of 13, The Raven, The
Collective. Ms. 7 of 9, will you stand up please?
KABOOOOOOOOOM
Brian
Karyl Bleddyn
In article <brianb1-3110...@cx31002-a.omhaw1.ne.home.com>,
bri...@home.com (Brian Barjenbruch) wrote:
=> > Borges eunt domus - Picard wrote on the enterprise.
=> > Borg#71: - "People call the borgs they go the house?"
=> > -"No. It says Borgs go home!"
=>
=> No it doesn't. What's latin for Borg? Come on!
=>
=> Brian
I believe this was answered in Royal Borg Episode No. 13.
--
Karyl Bleddyn |Jesus is Coming: Look Busy
merrypoo-at-odyline-dot-com (If you can't figure it out I probably don't want to read what you have to say anyway)
T Block
I fly thru space, I wear black clothes, and can withstand phaser blasts.
I Like to put on bio-mechanical-integrated-prosthehtic-devices, and hang
around in Cubes. Oh I wish I was a Borg-y, just like my dear assimilated
Papa
Brian Barjenbruch <bri...@home.com> wrote in article
<brianb1-3010...@cx31002-a.omhaw1.ne.home.com>...
> > Lemon curry?
>
> Hello, I want to assimilate some cheese.
>
> Brian
>
Jerry
In article <brianb1-3010...@cx31002-a.omhaw1.ne.home.com>,
bri...@home.com (Brian Barjenbruch) wrote:
>> This Borg is dead. You've sold me a dead Borg and I will not stand
>> for it.
>
>
> Brian
Brian Barjenbruch
No, that's next door, it's Being Assimilated On The Head lessons in here.
Brian
Eric van Bezooijen
In article <3459A370...@lufysik.fysik.lu.se>,
Kent Persson <ke...@lufysik.fysik.lu.se> wrote:
>Gregg Eshelman wrote:
>
>> Uh, your Queen, is she, uh, is she a goer?
>> Know what I mean? Nudge, nudge, wink-OUCH!
>
>
>This is beginning to look like the 'longest thread ever'...
>
>
>Brig. Jean-Luc-Luc-Luc-Luc-Pierre-Luc-Luc-Luc-Luc-Luc-Luc-Jaques Picard
>MP, OBE, Ph.D, etc (mrs)
In a white-wine sauce...
-Eric
--
Eric van Bezooijen er...@activesw.com http://www.activesw.com/~eric
"But the meaning of life is a mystery, that we don't understand so far
And the music of life is a rhapsody if you're happy the way that you are"
-- "Freudiana"
Eric van Bezooijen
In article <01bce5fc$93556de0$70580c26@veritas>,
Theflinx <tetde...@hotmail.com> wrote:
>
>'ello 'ello 'ello what's all this 'ere thing then?
>
>Inspector Woopiecushion of Starfleet security here, This thread has gotten
>entirely too silly- it's very silly indeed and I'm going to put a stop to
>it right now.
It's a dog's ... er man's life in the modern royal starfleet!
Robert Bogdon
It's tired, and shagged out, following a prolonged assimilation.
On 31 Oct 1997, Jerry wrote:
> Date: 31 Oct 1997 21:00:58 GMT
> From: Jerry <ever...@netnet.netREMOVE.THIS.TO.REPLY>
> Newsgroups: alt.tv.star-trek.voyager, alt.startrek.borg,
> alt.fan.monty-python, rec.arts.startrek.current,
> alt.swedish.chef.bork.bork.bork
> Subject: Re: Assimilated Monty Python of Borg
Robert Bogdon
uni...@wild.net
http://www.wild.net/~univac
Assistant System Administrator
Wild.Net, L.L.C. - Funny, the broccoli asked me the same question...
Victor Marshall
Jerry wrote:
>
> In article <brianb1-2910...@cx31002-a.omhaw1.ne.home.com>,
> bri...@home.com (Brian Barjenbruch) wrote:
> >> > > But I paid for an ARGUMENT!
> >> >
> >> > I've assimilated you once.
> >> >
> >> > Brian
> >>
> >> you never did!
> >
> >Well, I'm very sorry, but you didn't pay for the assimilation.
> >
> > Brian
> for it.
How about a little nible, then?
VM
Brian Barjenbruch
> >This is beginning to look like the 'longest thread ever'...
> >
> >
> >Brig. Jean-Luc-Luc-Luc-Luc-Pierre-Luc-Luc-Luc-Luc-Luc-Luc-Jaques Picard
> >MP, OBE, Ph.D, etc (mrs)
>
> In a white-wine sauce...
And now on the Borg Elevating Moment we have a drone who can speak only
the ends of words, Mr. gh of rg.
Brian
Brian Barjenbruch
> It's a dog's ... er man's life in the modern royal starfleet!
Look I warned you once about assimilating our slogan and if it happens
again I shall assimilate you like a ton of bricks. Right! Now for a
complete change of mood:
I've heard of unisex, but I've never assimilated it.
Brian