Top 10 WOT Tabloid Headlines
TB the peacekeeper
And now....from the home office in Ebou Dar, Altara:
Top 10 Tabloid Headlines in WOT:
10. "THE SPIRIT OF ARTUR HAWKWING SPOKE TO ME THROUGH MY DOG!"
9. "PERRIN & FAILE: EXCLUSIVE PICS OF THEIR WILD HONEYMOON"
8. "MATRIM CAUTHON REVEALS HIS TORMENTED CHILDHOOD:
'Half the town abused me for no reason.'"
7. "PADAN FAIN SLEEPS NAKED IN OXYGEN TENT HE BELIEVES WILL GIVE HIM
SEXUAL POWERS!"
6 "LOOSE 10 LBS A DAY ON THE NEW 'SEMIRHAGE DIET'"
5. "MOIRAINE LIVES!! Seen working in 7-11 store in Michigan"
4. "WHITECLOAK SCANDAL!! Galad Arrested With Transvestite Prostitute!"
3. "ROYAL FAMILY SHOCKER: EGWENE TELLS GAWYN 'You're smothering me, I
want out!'"
2. "ABDUCTED BY SEANCHAN! 'They took me aboard their mother ship and
prodded me with sharp instruments'"
1. "I'M CARRYING THE DRAGON REBORN'S LOVE-CHILD!"
TB the peacekeeper
"Well let's face it, some people have a way with words, while
others......um......uh.......oh, not-have-way, I guess"
--Steve Martin
-------------------==== Posted via Deja News ====-----------------------
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Richard M. Boye'
Karl-Johan Noren wrote:
>
> In <8661286...@dejanews.com>,
> TB the peacekeeper <tbre...@telespec.com> wrote:
>
> > And now....from the home office in Ebou Dar, Altara:
> >
> > Top 10 Tabloid Headlines in WOT:
>
>
> Prästeståndet 8 mm!
Okay, I'll bite.
Karl-Johan, translation, please?
--
Richard M. Boye'
* wa...@webspan.net
http://www.webspan.net/~waldo
"...And when I woke up, my carpet was gone."
Karl-Johan Noren
> And now....from the home office in Ebou Dar, Altara:
>
> Top 10 Tabloid Headlines in WOT:
[ snip ]
Prästeståndet 8 mm!
(That one's a beauty - there are more puns than words in
it. Too bad I can't claim credit for it...)
--
Karl-Johan "Gareth Bryne" Norén (Noren with acute e)
k-j-...@dsv.su.se -- http://www.dsv.su.se/~k-j-nore/
- To believe people are as stupid as one believes is
stupider than one can believe
RWlkrSmith
Oh, bravo (or brava as the case may be).
These appeared, no doubt, in the
World Wide Wheel of Time - or was it the
Randland Enquirer?
Steven Hillage
[RWlkrSmith _totally_ snipped the Thu, 12 Jun 1997 post by
TB the peacekeeper <tbre...@telespec.com>
which gave 10 WoT headlines referred to in post title. Fortunately for
me the original post was still on my server.]
Only a very limited distribution and hence more likely to be either the
_Altaran Advertiser_ (motto '...but wait, there's more ... ' [Aside: is
this also RJ's philosophy regarding WoT books?]) or the _Ebou Dari Doh_
(H. Simpson editor)
--
Steven Hillage | "Meat, Marm, meat! You've fed the boy too much meat!
| That's why he's so agressive - at the Workhouse we
| give them only gruel. And that thin and tasteless."
| Mr. Bumble _Oliver Twist_ Charles Dickens
Karl-Johan Noren
In <33A082...@webspan.net>,
"Richard M. Boye'" <wa...@webspan.net> wrote:
> Karl-Johan Noren wrote:
>
> > TB the peacekeeper <tbre...@telespec.com> wrote:
> > > And now....from the home office in Ebou Dar, Altara:
> > > Top 10 Tabloid Headlines in WOT:
> >
> > [ snip ]
> > Prästeståndet 8 mm!
>
> Okay, I'll bite.
> Karl-Johan, translation, please?
This isn't going to be a translation but an explanation :-)
First and simplest "präst" is "priest", but in this context
it is modified to of or related to the priest(s).
"ståndet" have several possible meanings, but the two
important ones are erection and a (social) class[1]. We thus
have either "the priest's erection" or "the priest class".
8 mm is 8 mm, but it is also used for hobby films (because
they before the video arrived often were made on tapes 8 mm
wide).
--
Karl-Johan "Gareth Bryne" Norén (Noren with acute e)
k-j-...@dsv.su.se -- http://www.dsv.su.se/~k-j-nore/
- To believe people are as stupid as one believes is
stupider than one can believe
[1] The meaning is a little more complicated because it goes
back to when Sweden had a four-chamber congress - one
chamber for every "stånd" (nobles, priests, burghers and
farmers).
Kid Probability
Steven Hillage <comp...@charlton.vic.edu.au> wrote in article
<33A160...@charlton.vic.edu.au>...
> [RWlkrSmith _totally_ snipped the Thu, 12 Jun 1997 post by
>
> RWlkrSmith wrote:
> >
> > Oh, bravo (or brava as the case may be).
> > These appeared, no doubt, in the
> > World Wide Wheel of Time - or was it the
> > Randland Enquirer?
> TB the peacekeeper <tbre...@telespec.com>
>
> which gave 10 WoT headlines referred to in post title. Fortunately for
> me the original post was still on my server.]
It wasn't on mine! Damn. I _always_ read the tabloids. Anybody got a
copy?
Kid Probability
My hammer is small
and makes the noise of a child's Cap-gun
-Throe Jr.
Kid Probability
> My hammer is small
> and makes the noise of a child's Cap-gun
>
> -Throe Jr.
*ahem, cough, cough* Sorry, folks, that would be "Thor Jr.", not Throe.
Stupid spellchecker. Stupid idiot operating spellchecker.
Kid Probability
tsbr...@gmail.com
On Thursday, June 12, 1997 12:00:00 AM UTC-7, TB the peacekeeper wrote:
> And now....from the home office in Ebou Dar, Altara:
>
> Top 10 Tabloid Headlines in WOT:
>
>
> 9. "PERRIN & FAILE: EXCLUSIVE PICS OF THEIR WILD HONEYMOON"
>
> 8. "MATRIM CAUTHON REVEALS HIS TORMENTED CHILDHOOD:
> 'Half the town abused me for no reason.'"
>
> 7. "PADAN FAIN SLEEPS NAKED IN OXYGEN TENT HE BELIEVES WILL GIVE HIM
> SEXUAL POWERS!"
>
> 6 "LOOSE 10 LBS A DAY ON THE NEW 'SEMIRHAGE DIET'"
>
> 5. "MOIRAINE LIVES!! Seen working in 7-11 store in Michigan"
>
> 4. "WHITECLOAK SCANDAL!! Galad Arrested With Transvestite Prostitute!"
>
> 3. "ROYAL FAMILY SHOCKER: EGWENE TELLS GAWYN 'You're smothering me, I
> want out!'"
>
> 2. "ABDUCTED BY SEANCHAN! 'They took me aboard their mother ship and
> prodded me with sharp instruments'"
>
> 1. "I'M CARRYING THE DRAGON REBORN'S LOVE-CHILD!"
Queen Of Andor Reveals That She Is carrying Dragon's Twins.
Aiel Wise One Tops Queen, Saying That She Is Carrying Dragon's Quadruplets.
First Of Mayne Falls For Whitecloak Leader.
Woman: I Married A Trolloc!
tsbr...@gmail.com
> And now....from the home office in Ebou Dar, Altara:
>
> Top 10 Tabloid Headlines in WOT:
>
> 10. "THE SPIRIT OF ARTUR HAWKWING SPOKE TO ME THROUGH MY DOG!"
>
> 9. "PERRIN & FAILE: EXCLUSIVE PICS OF THEIR WILD HONEYMOON"
>
> 8. "MATRIM CAUTHON REVEALS HIS TORMENTED CHILDHOOD:
> 'Half the town abused me for no reason.'"
>
> 7. "PADAN FAIN SLEEPS NAKED IN OXYGEN TENT HE BELIEVES WILL GIVE HIM
> SEXUAL POWERS!"
>
> 6 "LOOSE 10 LBS A DAY ON THE NEW 'SEMIRHAGE DIET'"
>
> 5. "MOIRAINE LIVES!! Seen working in 7-11 store in Michigan"
>
> 4. "WHITECLOAK SCANDAL!! Galad Arrested With Transvestite Prostitute!"
>
> 3. "ROYAL FAMILY SHOCKER: EGWENE TELLS GAWYN 'You're smothering me, I
> want out!'"
>
> 2. "ABDUCTED BY SEANCHAN! 'They took me aboard their mother ship and
> prodded me with sharp instruments'"
>
> 1. "I'M CARRYING THE DRAGON REBORN'S LOVE-CHILD!"