Cat talk
David Williams
Cats are in fact scientists of chaos theory.
Buy them some toys, and they can be totally disinterested. But give them
the opportunity to study chaos and they will be fascinated for hours
For example, the unpatterened and erratic behavior inherent in the movement
of a moth. (Though that may just be the hunting instinct.) The same
fascination with the movement of a dangling string when batted with a paw,
or a ball, paperclip, twist-tie, or plastic milk jug ring on a Pergo floor.
Who knew they were cutting-edge geniuses?
Which leads me to believe Douglas Adams may have been wrong about the mice.
I think he should have used cats.
-David W.
Mickey
news:omT7b.31128$mp.1...@rwcrnsc51.ops.asp.att.net...
Cats can walk through walls.....
Mickey
Wendy of NJ
Mickey wrote:
> Cats can walk through walls.....
Mickey, are you really Jubal Harshaw in disguise?
-Wendy
LK
I think they are double agents for the Vorlons and the Shadows and
other group we haven't yet heard of.
The cat in my lap is restless. Does he know what I'm typ
Mickey
news:3F61C28...@hotmail.com...
>
>
> Mickey wrote:
>
> > Cats can walk through walls.....
>
> Mickey, are you really Jubal Harshaw in disguise?
Funny you should say that, as it has been mentioned to me before. Then
again, it may have something to do wit the fact that the only word of
English the guard dogs understand is FRONT. The rest of the command they
understand are in Hebrew, to prevent someone from playing with their heads
:)
Mickey
Mena Ryan
>
> Having read the other postings and observed our cat, I have a new theory:
>
> Cats are in fact scientists of chaos theory.
>
> Buy them some toys, and they can be totally disinterested. But give them
> the opportunity to study chaos and they will be fascinated for hours
> For example, the unpatterened and erratic behavior inherent in the movement
> of a moth. (Though that may just be the hunting instinct.) The same
> fascination with the movement of a dangling string when batted with a paw,
> or a ball, paperclip, twist-tie, or plastic milk jug ring on a Pergo floor.
This new cat has tackled a bottle of Windex that was sitting on the
floor. I still have no idea why but since she is a cat, it isn't worth
it to even try to figure that out.
--
-------------------------------------
If you want to e-mail me, please use coldyank1 at jolt mail dot com
Hey, what's so funny?
http://user.mc.net/~mena/CATS/laughing.htm
Joseph DeMartino
No, it just seems that way. Actualy the make the Jump to "Cat Space" and
then re-emerge into normal space on the other side of the wall. <g>
Joe
Mickey
news:6fO8b.2020$KN1...@bignews2.bellsouth.net...
> > Cats can walk through walls.....
>
> No, it just seems that way. Actualy the make the Jump to "Cat Space" and
> then re-emerge into normal space on the other side of the wall. <g>
>
LoL
Been watching too much SG-1?
Mickey
Laura Appelbaum
news:omT7b.31128$mp.1...@rwcrnsc51.ops.asp.att.net...
>
> Cats are in fact scientists of chaos theory.
>
> Buy them some toys, and they can be totally disinterested. But give them
> the opportunity to study chaos and they will be fascinated for hours
> For example, the unpatterened and erratic behavior inherent in the
movement
> of a moth. (Though that may just be the hunting instinct.) The same
> fascination with the movement of a dangling string when batted with a paw,
> or a ball, paperclip, twist-tie, or plastic milk jug ring on a Pergo
floor.
>
> Who knew they were cutting-edge geniuses?
>
not scientists, they're political activists of the highest order who have a
deep-seated aversion to our capitalist, consumerist society. By ignoring
the bespangled, brightly-colored, catnip-scented and often expensive toys we
compulsively bring home to them and instead turning their full attention,
time and time again to specks of dust, strips of paper and milk jug rings,
they are in fact delivering a pointed political commentary about the human
compulsion to buy entertainment. True enjoyment, the cats are trying to
tell us, comes serendipitously and freely, not packaged with instructions
and encased in plastic wrap. While we sit, transfixed, for house at a time
at commercial television, the cat turns to the wall and stares zen-like into
space, seeking enlightenment free from the distortions demanded by the
marketplace. And yet, so enthralled are we with our allegedly greater
brainpower, we are too arrogant, nay, too trained, too molded by an
imperialist, tyrannical society, to learn at their feet.
;D
LMA
David Williams
like that.
Though I'll counter-argue that cats are very materialistic WRT foodstuffs.
She eats her (dry) Purina Dental Diet. But, a cat who otherwise never
speaks, or even meows, becomes quite eloquent if you open the cabinet
containing the cans of Fancy Feast. Though you might not want some of her
speech translated into human. My wife opened that cabinet the other day
and, in her words, the rough translation was "Bitch! Drop the f**king
peanut butter and give me some sliced turkey!" (My wife's translation, not
mine.)
She and I argue about who is guilty for teaching the cat to lick the gravy
off the spoon after we dish it up. But it has become a veritable sine qua
non.
And of course, there's George. An EXTREMELY ratty-looking George Jetson
stuffed doll that is her bizarre secret friend. The stories go on and on,
but I'll spare you. I use this to claim that the cat is a also a sci-fi
fan, though of a somewhat lower order.
And strangely enough, she WILL occasionally watch what is on the tv. She is
also intrigued by the little dudes running around on the monitor when my
wife or I play Age of Empires. And when a show or commercial contains taped
sound fx of a cat screeching, et al., she goes NUCKING FUTS!
Enough. I need to get to bed.
-David W.
"Laura Appelbaum" <l-app...@mindspring.com> wrote in message
news:vm4bs42...@corp.supernews.com...
Laura Appelbaum
news:3F624CE1...@yahoo.com...
>
> This new cat has tackled a bottle of Windex that was sitting on the floor.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
There you have it -- it was eye level, it didn't blink, didn't move, clearly
it was challenging her (or his) authority. Can't have that. <G>
LMA
David Williams
Ummm. I'm going hazard a more serious guess that the cat just found the
stench of ammonia offensive.
-David W.
Iva
>Laura Appelbaum wrote:
> >Mena Ryan wrote: > This new cat has tackled a bottle of Windex
that was sitting on the
> floor.
> >
> > ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
> > There you have it -- it was eye level, it didn't blink,
didn't move,
> clearly
> > it was challenging her (or his) authority. Can't have that.
<G>
> >
>
found the
> stench of ammonia offensive.
Naw, if it had found that odor offensive, it would just have
tried to bury the bottle! <g>
My oldest cat does that to certain canned cat food that he will
*not* eat.
-------
Iva
David Williams
"Iva" <iv...@ptd.net> wrote in message
news:gG49b.2450$vj4.2...@nnrp1.ptd.net...
> Naw, if it had found that odor offensive, it would just have
> tried to bury the bottle! <g>
> My oldest cat does that to certain canned cat food that he will
> *not* eat.
Sitting up reading in bed one evening, I snacked on a Hershey's Kiss that
I'd picked up somewhere. My wife was reading and petting the the cat. I
rolled up the aluminum foil wrapper and tossed it to her (the cat, not my
wife), assuming she'd bat it around and play with it. It DID catch her
attention and she ran over and sniffed it. Then she looked up at me with a
disturbed look on her face as she pawed at the bed linens trying to bury it!
The look was almost like confused guilt - "How did THAT get here?!"
My wife and I were in hysterics for 20 minutes. Poor little fur-ball had no
idea. Needless to say, the Hershey company would definitely NOT want this
story to get around. (Though Nestle might...) "Chocolate that makes cats
want to bury it!"
Regards,
-David W.
Mickey
ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!
Mickey
Eliyahu Rooff
great meal that you'd worked hard to prepare, and having one or more cats
take a perfunctory sniff before going through the motions of covering it
with the carpet... Talk about criticism that hurts... :-)
Eliyahu
Eliyahu Rooff
For sure... they're far more interested in the container than the
contents...We can bring home a combination scratching post/catnip
dispenser/automatic groomer/water dish/food generator, and all they really
want is for us to get it out of the box so they can get inside that box and
play.
Eliyahu
Laura Appelbaum
> Wow. You win. I'm a "sales professional" and I've never spun a load of
BS
> like that.
Well hey, I've gotta put that honors degree in English to use *somehow.*
Lord knows it hasn't earned me any money or anything! <G>
> Though I'll counter-argue that cats are very materialistic WRT foodstuffs.
> She eats her (dry) Purina Dental Diet. But, a cat who otherwise never
> speaks, or even meows, becomes quite eloquent if you open the cabinet
> containing the cans of Fancy Feast. Though you might not want some of her
> speech translated into human. My wife opened that cabinet the other day
> and, in her words, the rough translation was "Bitch! Drop the f**king
> peanut butter and give me some sliced turkey!" (My wife's translation,
not
> mine.)
>
LOL! Corners early on came to identify a certain set of clear desert bowls
with ice cream ... now, anytime she sees anyone eating anything from them --
could be the desired ice cream, could be apple sauce, could be any number of
things she's actually have no interest in, she'll siddle up to them, smack
her lips, and keep starring, meowing, even crawling on your lap until she
gets to check out what's actually inside. It's totally Pavlovian only she
taught it to herself.
LMA
David Williams
> news:4dV8b.55436$mp.2...@rwcrnsc51.ops.asp.att.net...
> > speaks, or even meows, becomes quite eloquent if you open the cabinet
> > containing the cans of Fancy Feast. Though you might not want some of
her
> > speech translated into human.
Replying to my own post. So shoot me.
Anyway, I am helping out a colleague at a trade show for premium/incentive
buyers. My colleague has one of the hits of the show with a new product
called the "Bow-Lingual".
No lie - it's a device that measures a dog's speech and body movements and
provides translations of their meaning into human speech. A bark translator
if you will.
Suffice it to say, we are having a hell of a good time with it!
-David W.
Eliyahu Rooff
it would help, though, since the only noise Tatiahna ever makes is a soft
"meep, meep" when I clip her claws, and the meaning is quite obvious to
anyone listening: "I don't like this at all."
Eliyahu
Laura Appelbaum
news:vmfuegd...@corp.supernews.com...
>
> "David Williams" <dwilli...@comcast.net> wrote in message
> news:chS9b.275517$2x.7...@rwcrnsc52.ops.asp.att.net...
> > Replying to my own post. So shoot me.
BANG! <G>
> > Anyway, I am helping out a colleague at a trade show for
premium/incentive
> > buyers. My colleague has one of the hits of the show with a new product
> > called the "Bow-Lingual".
> > No lie - it's a device that measures a dog's speech and body movements
and
> > provides translations of their meaning into human speech. A bark
> translator
> > if you will.
> >
> > Suffice it to say, we are having a hell of a good time with it!
> >
> I understand there's now a corresponding device for cats. Not sure how
much
> it would help, though, since the only noise Tatiahna ever makes is a soft
> "meep, meep" when I clip her claws, and the meaning is quite obvious to
> anyone listening: "I don't like this at all."
>
The whole thing, being utterly fictional anyway, is just like that episode
of The Simpsons where someone voiced by Danny Devito (I forget the
character) invents a device that translates baby talk.
LMA
Wendy of NJ
It was Homer's bastard brother, Uncle something. He also bought Lisa a
pony, and Homer got to design a car.
-Wendy
Matt Ion
> Ummm. I'm going hazard a more serious guess that the cat just found the
> stench of ammonia offensive.
Or VERY enticing...