Hi everyone,
I've been reading alot of posts lately where someone says "I saw this
guy who looked like a scalper" or "If I see a someone in Target who
looks like a scalper I'll punch em in the gut!". So what does a scalper
look like?? What are the tell-tale signs that someone is hunting for a
profit? Alot of people actually seem to have this mental picture that a
scalper is a scruffy-looking loser. Can anyone help me on this?
Shadroth
"The Universe, as has been observed before, is an unsettlingly big place,
a fact which for the sake of a quiet life most people tend to ignore." -
Douglas Adams
> So what does a scalper
> look like?? What are the tell-tale signs that someone is hunting for a
> profit? Alot of people actually seem to have this mental picture that a
> scalper is a scruffy-looking loser. Can anyone help me on this?
First the best people to really ask this are your TRU or KB employees.
I'm *not* saying they are vanheads, but they do have to see them
everyday. I know that many TRU employees HATE them, but being good
employees they still sell toys to them.
A vanhead(s) that I have confirmed living in my Area is a very short
Asian couple ... no I do not for a minute think that Asians scalp in
general, but I did want to simply state, that two very small (as in
5'4") people go to just about every retail/toy store in my region. They
bring with them a brown rusty van and about 5-6 kids. The kids
generally stay in the van, and the vanheads actually walk down the isles
and try to scalp rare figures. The husband has approached me and asked
if I wanted a Jedi Luke (this was over a year ago when he was scarce out
here) for $25. I laughed and told him that I would pay the same $5 he
did or just wait till next week (and yes, the Jedi Luke was there then).
Another vanhead that I've seen at toy shows is a smelly (he really was)
Caucassian (don't know if I spelled this right) guy about 6' and with a
funny beer belly, not that he looked whimpy ... he just looked slow, but
strong. He had a tattoo on his arm and black unwashed hair. He wasn't
doing too much business at the show, but he did brag about buying all
his toys a K-Marts and tried to talk me into his limited edition Picard
or something of the like.
Of course I've talked to people in TRU who buy figures and trade them to
comic stores. Most of these people are Caucassian males 5'8" to 6'2"
all weights, but interestingly enough most have fair skins or look like
they don't sleep well. They are young, and could easily be mistaken (if
they are not) as Grunge. I think they are College kids and a few HS
kids, but I've never seen them try and sell stuff to anybody ... they
just claim to trade to comic stores (most likely for trading cards or
comics).
But what is most interesting, is that of this crowd, those guys I've
seen with their girlfriends are just plain and simple collectors. Most
of the opening their figures! And they are much cleaner (probably why
they are girlfriended). ;)
But in general store employees seem consider most males between the ages
of 18 and 30 to be vanheads. But fear not, if you are a male and in
this age group (like myself) if you are polite and honest, employees
warm up to you.
I think the appearance is secondary to the mannerisms of vanhead. Just
look at the posts in this newsgroup. Any time you see an actually
exchange between a vanhead and a collector, sometimes the collectors get
foul o-mouth and attitude, but more often the vanheads get irrational
and blow their tops ... or at least FACPOV [From a Certain Point of
View] <--- remember Obi-wan saying this in SW, everybody does remember
SW the film in this NG, right? ;)
Michael Mierzwa
scalper= a man in late twenties to late thirties dressed in red dirty
sweat pants that don't go above his belly. belly is very large, one
could say beer belly, but i would say something more like bloated. man
smells of gpc ciggarettes and pop. there is a sweat stain around the
belly button area on his hooters t-shirt. his hair is red and wispy,
not washed with a receding hairline. probably a weeks growth of beard,
or a yellow nicotine stained mustache.
his shoes are worn out Nike Air jordans from 1989 with loose fitting sky
blue socks hanging out around his ankles. he can be heard wheezing as he
makes his way to the toy dept way at the back of Wal*Mart mumbling ,
"why does it have to be so far.." he will be thumbing through the hot
wheels and dropping them on the floor, then over to the SLU's nothing
there, then over to the SW stuff. ahh five hundred slave leias!! he buys
them all and stuffs them into a cart he snatched from an unsuspecting
mother looking for sleia for her 9 year old boy.
he screams get outta my way i'm gonna be rich!!
and runs to the counter, the employee tells him there is a limit to 25
figs per customer. he screams a raspy yell for the manager. he
explains that he is doing his christmas shopping early and slips the
manager a $5 bill. the manager says, "just this once."
look for his rusty 1984 blue chevy van, with a sliding door and plates
that say spidey or clark or something.
marc
gold might be waiting for you at the end of the rainbow!
-this is how I picture them anyways!
"Wh...What?"
"Do they LOOK like a BItch?"
"Well..yes!"
Ahem...anyway...
Shadroth wrote:
>
> Hi everyone,
>
> I've been reading alot of posts lately where someone says "I saw this
> guy who looked like a scalper" or "If I see a someone in Target who
> looks like a scalper I'll punch em in the gut!". So what does a scalper
> look like?? What are the tell-tale signs that someone is hunting for a
> profit? Alot of people actually seem to have this mental picture that a
> scalper is a scruffy-looking loser. Can anyone help me on this?
>
> Shadroth
Oh let me count the ways....
1) You saw the guy three weeks ago at the local toy show. He had one of
the
many booths that were 90% full of the latest POTF2. You laughed at
him.
You moved on to the booths that had like...vintage stuff.
2) You know the guy from the comic shop that you, for some strange
reason,
go to for _comics_ (odd). Apparently he can't afford a booth at the
show...perhaps if he stuck to selling comics in the first place....
3) The guy actually has a price guide/bible in hand, in aisle 7C, and is
thumbing thru it, glancing at the pegs, muttering to himself,
thumbing
thru it, glancing at the pegs, muttering......
4) The guy has a cartful of 20 each of the new figures from the latest
shipment. When you ask him if you can see one or God forbid..have one
of each..he either a) recoils in fright (not used to being spoken to)
and starts squealing "mineminemineminemine!!!", b) says " <burp>
shoulda
gotten here earlier, buddy" or c) 'politely' says no, but graciously
offers to sell one of each to you for $17, in the parking lot.
5) You make the mistake of striking up a conversation with him in the
faint hope that he's a collector, and he starts yammering about how
he
has 237 Leias, or how much Yak Face (or whatever the current 3 week
old
figure is) is worth.
6) If he has an NTW or Nascar hat on.
7) If he has a Def Leppard shirt from 1985 on.
8) If, at first, you mistake him for a Morlock.
9) If, at first, you mistake him for Al Bundy.
10) If you drive by TRU/Target/etc on the way to _WORK_ and see somebody
with any
combination of these characteristics, standing by the entrance at
6am.
Reid Worth
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absolut zero
>
>Hi everyone,
>
>I've been reading alot of posts lately where someone says "I saw this
>guy who looked like a scalper" or "If I see a someone in Target who
>looks like a scalper I'll punch em in the gut!". So what does a scalper
>look like?? What are the tell-tale signs that someone is hunting for a
>profit? Alot of people actually seem to have this mental picture that a
>scalper is a scruffy-looking loser. Can anyone help me on this?
The simplest and best characterization of a scalper I think is:
Someone with a pager, who looks like he has no business owning a
pager.
All the definitions I've seen in this thread hold true to my
observations as well. However all the ones I've seen have a pager
hanging off their hip in addition to being an unsavory looking person.
I mean just looking at these people I can't imagine anyone needing to
find them...much less find them fast...unless it's on of their toy
contacts, plants, or other scouts.
-Todd
Agreed!! A scalper guy I see all the time at the local Wal Mart called the
snowtrooper and royal guard "the white guy and the red guy". He is such a
jerkoff.
From what I understand, scalpers look like the new Dengar figure.
I agree too about them not being able to pronounce the figure names. That
pisses me off so much. My friend Gary isn't a scalper, but he'll race out
every day and have some sort of amazing luck that lets him find everything
weeks before I do. And being the good friend that he is, he won't even bother
to pick stuff up for me. I remember earlier this summer he was so impressed
that he found a Grandma Murfkin before me. I had no idea what he was talking
about until I saw it was a Grand Moff Tarkin. I should've ripped him out of
the bastard's hands. Grandma Murfkin. Don't even get me started on the
Skippy Lonno Crustacian (Skiff Guard Lando Calrissian)! It's time for me to
settle down now.....
Mikey
alt.music.gwar court jester
alt.mikey.gwar fallen queen
"Phuc you phagg!", Balsac, the Jaws O'Death
> Okay, this joke may have already been made, but I'm gonna do it anyway.....
>
> From what I understand, scalpers look like the new Dengar figure.
>
IMO, I think they look more like the new Rancor Keeper figure, Dengar is
not fat enough.
--
Doug Kern
AKA Monocle
dke...@idt.net
Homepage: http://idt.net/~dkern2
Visit The Shrine to Blackarachnia!: http://idt.net/~dkern2/Blackarachnia/index
Also all the scum-bags at flea-markets, toy shows, and antique marts.
Respectfully,
Thomas C. Mlot
Hail Brak,
Mike
Eb morejon <emor...@roanoke.infi.net> wrote in article
<344D2B...@roanoke.infi.net>...
> Take Dengar's head and put it on the Rancor Keeper's body and you've got
> your own custom made scalper! Or you could cut off RK's turbin, add a
> ponytail with some Super Sculpey, paint on a goatee and your in
> business. Oh, how the ladies love that look!
Hey now, I have a ponytail and a goatee! Are you calling me a scalper, do
I look like a scalper to you, am I here to scalp you? I guess the only
difference between me and the scalper then is that I don't have a Rancor
Keeper physique!
Ron