Equally with all others

[Ilya Shambat]

1

Equally with all others
I want to serve you,
Drying from jealousy
My lips turned blue.
Word does not slake
A mouth dry from despair
Without you I am breathless
In empty air.

2

I am no longer jealous
But yet I want you, dear,
I carry me like sacrifice
To executioner,
And no I will not call you
Not love not glee;
The wild and foreign blood
Runs now through me.

3

Wait for one moment
And this I will tell you:
Not joy, but torment I find in you.
And, like a sacrilege,
Bitten in frenzy
Your tender cherry mouth
Still calls to me.

4

Return to me at last, love,
It's awful without you
Never more strongly
Have I felt you.
And in the midnight drama,
Asleep, awake,
I call your name out loud
Even as I shake.

By Osip Mandelshtam
Translated from Russian by Ilya Shambat
https://sites.google.com/site/ibshambat