OT: The Chain Letter to End All Chain Letters
VKGARRY73
typing this for me, because I can't. She is crying. The reason she is so sad is
because I'm so sick. I was born without a body. It doesn't hurt, except
when I try to breathe. The doctors gave me an artificial body. It is a burlap
bag filled with leaves. The doctors said that was the best they could do on
account of us having no money or insurance. I would like to have a body
transplant, but we need more money. Mommy doesn't work because she said
nobody hires crying people. I said, "Don't cry, Mommy," and she hugged
my burlap bag. Mommy always gives me hugs, even though she's allergic to
burlap and it makes her sneeze and chafes her real bad.
I hope you will help me. You can help me if you forward this email to
everyone you know. Forward it to people you don't know, too. Dr.
Johansen said that for every person you forward this email to, Bill Gates will
team up with AOL and send a nickel to NASA. With that funding, NASA will
collect prayers from school children all over America and have the astronauts
take them up into space so that the angels can hear them better. Then they
will come back to earth and go to the Pope, and he will take up a collection
in church and send all the money to the doctors. The doctors could help me
get better then.
Maybe one day I will be able to play baseball. Right now I can only be
third base.
Every time you forward this letter, the astronauts can take more
prayers to the angels and my dream will be closer to coming true. Please help
me. Mommy is so sad, and I want a body. I don't want my leaves to rot before
I turn 10. If you don't forward this email, that's okay. Mommy says you're
a mean and heartless bastard who doesn't care about a poor little boy with
only a head. She says that if you don't stew in the raw pit of your own
guilt-ridden stomach, she hopes you die a long slow, horrible death and
then burn forever in hell. What kind of cruel person are you that you can't
take five freakin' minutes to forward this to all your friends so that they
can feel guilt and shame about ignoring a poor, bodiless nine-year-old
boy?
Please help me. I try to be happy, but it's hard. I wish I had a
kitty. I wish I could hold a kitty. I wish I could hold a kitty that wouldn't
chew on me and try to bury its turds in the leaves of my burlap body. I wish
thatvery much.
Thank You, Billy "Smiles" Evans
P.S. You can send money to the person who sent you this because that
person is very trustworthy.
Rick Clavejo
||o o|| [.alright...who penciled me ?
||||||||||
|||||||||| "I thought you were boy named sew...hey at least you got
a body...all I got is was a bag "
---I.dumbHuh
Steve Spang
> > My name is Billy Evans.
<snip>
This must be a cable network ... where they play the same damn movies every other
night.
I swear this must be the 3rd or 4th time I've seen this same sob story... too
pathetic for words, right now.
Hello, my name is Steve. 37 years of drum corps has caused me to lose wife, home,
and career. Please drop a nickel in my cup...
--
Steve 8-)_~
"Klaatu barada nikto"
Charlie Groh
VKGARRY73 wrote:
> ...my advice to you, Billy, is to quit while you're ahead. cg