Miss Piggy Comes Forward Says She Was Also Sexually Assaulted by Bill Cosby

[Ubiquitous]

The famous puppet of Miss Piggy was allegedly sexually assaulted by
star comedian turned sexual predator, Bill Cosby, we learn this
morning.

The aggression of the Miss Piggy puppet allegedly took place in the
1980s during a Christmas party in Hollywood where artists of the famous
Jim Henson studios were present.

Bill Cosby would have taken advantage of a moment of inattention of the
puppeteers to satisfy his sexual appetite with the famous wife of the
Kermit the Frog character.

Two of the three puppeteers present believe they were drugged during
the event.

“We were having a few drinks with Bill, when suddenly I felt my legs
weaken and my head started to spin. I woke up moments later and Miss
Piggy was gone. I found her again later in the evening, and obviously,
she had undergone some severe abuse” says Frank Oz, who was Miss
Piggy’s puppeteer for over 30 years. “I had to throw the puppet away,
it was in such a horrid condition” he told a local Fox news reporter,
obviously still in shock despite the years.

The news was received as a shock wave on social media worldwide,
leaving users utterly disturbed and a with sense of profound disgust.

“Why would anybody desecrate the puppet of Miss Piggy!? What a sick
bastard! All my childhood memories have gone up in smoke” wrote a
Twitter user, visibly disgusted by the whole affair. “I hope this sick
pervert rots in jail for a long time!”writes another.

Jim Henson studios could take legal action against the sexual predator
who is accused of sexual assault by 46 other women.


---
In the War on Women, Hillary fought an entire platoon of sexually
abused females on behalf of Bill.

[Michael Black]

On Fri, 30 Oct 2015, Ubiquitous wrote:

> The famous puppet of Miss Piggy was allegedly sexually assaulted by
> star comedian turned sexual predator, Bill Cosby, we learn this
> morning.
>
> The aggression of the Miss Piggy puppet allegedly took place in the
> 1980s during a Christmas party in Hollywood where artists of the famous
> Jim Henson studios were present.
>

She should be glad it wasn't Jared from Subway, he'd abuse her and then
put her in a sandwich to eat.

Michael

[Obveeus]

To be fair, most of us would happily convert her into sandwich material.
Poor Kermit lost a non-sharp cousin to that same outcome.

Well, ok, birds of prey don't bother with bread and tomato since they
are too busy with the nightly newscast.

[Barry Margolin]

In article <n00rtD$bf9$2...@dont-email.me>,

Ubiquitous <web...@polaris.net> wrote:
> “Why would anybody desecrate the puppet of Miss Piggy!? What a sick
> bastard! All my childhood memories have gone up in smoke” wrote a
> Twitter user, visibly disgusted by the whole affair. “I hope this sick
> pervert rots in jail for a long time!”writes another.

This is how I knew the story was a joke -- you can't see Twitter users.

:)

--
Barry Margolin
Arlington, MA

[Clu]

I COUNT THREE MAJOR NEWS POINTS FROM 2015 BEING SPOOFED HERE... AH AH
AH! (Lighting crashes).

[jmfabi...@gmail.com]

LOL you're acting like The Goth Count.

And this really did happen! Bill was sexually harassing Piggy when he appeared on The Muppet Show! I remember seeing it!!!