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LNH20: Bite-Size Tales of the LNH v20 #7: "First Republic"

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Andrew Perron

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May 2, 2012, 6:52:43 AM5/2/12
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Bite-Size Tales of the LNH v20 #7:
"First Republic"
By Andrew Perron

****

A dark room with a bright screen, lit up but blank.

"Let me explain to you the history of Earth-Chi."

With a *click*, an image is projected of Europe, with red and green
arrows crawling over it.

"World War II. Hitler is assassinated before he can break Nazi
Germany's pact with Communist Russia. A combined Nazi-Soviet-Fascist
force steamrolls, slowly but surely, through all defending forces.
Britain falls, and once the Axis has spread across Europe, they make
the leap across the Atlantic."

A *click* showing bombers over New York City.

"The United States has not been idle. They have prepared for this
moment with all their might. Their arms and men are ready."

"And they fail."

A *click* and the bombers are over Washington DC.

"They are not expecting the tactics and technology the Axis brings to
bear. They are faster than expected, and manage to sweep past the bulk
of American defense. The defenders rally, but are routed repeatedly."

A *click* shows men burning papers on the Capitol steps.

"By the time the Axis war machine approaches DC, the government is
panicking. Roosevelt tries to keep order, but congressmen and senators
flee in droves. He leaves for parts unknown."

*Click.* A man in a suit hands a rolled-up sheet of paper to a
decorated general.

"A collaborationist government is setup and delivers an official
declaration of armistice, and message are broadcast, telling the people
to stand down."

*Click.* Soldiers, faces smeared with mud, standing in a forest around
a tank, in which Roosevelt defiantly stands.

"Some do... and many do not. The Free States of America comes
together, declaring themselves the true government, and the American
Resistance begins."

*Click.* A pitched battle between two armies, planes dogfighting
overhead.

"For five long years, they battle, and though it is hard, endlessly
hard, they never stop."

*Click.* The map of Europe again, with bright blue lines over the red
and green ones.

"In Europe, the Axis cannot hold what they have taken; in victory, they
turn on each other. From without and from within, they are broken
apart, as nations rise up. Forces are called back to the mainland, and
as World War II ends years late, America is free once more."

*Click.* Cheering and celebration in the streets of a war-torn
Philadelphia.

"Now, there will be a short quiz. Just the one question."

The lights come up, showing Doc Nostalgia operating the projector. He
turns to face Configuration Man, sitting at a desk, fidgeting and
looking nervous.

"Would you say," said Doc Nostalgia, pacing back and forth, seemingly
relaxed, "that what happened is something you could reasonably call
'the US surrendering'?"

"Well, uh, I mean, technically the government did--" Configuration Man
squirmed as Doc Nostalgia looked at him. "Um, no."

Doc Nostalgia nodded, turning away from Configuration Man. "And would
you say this speaks to anything about the national character, and their
tendency towards surrender?"

"...no?"

Doc Nostalgia spun around, eyes blazing, and smacked his hands down
hard on the desk. "Then WHY, for the LOVE of EVERYTHING you hold dear,
do you assume that JUST THAT ASSOCIATION holds true for FRANCE!?"

Fearless Leader raised an eyebrow as Doc Nostalgia ranted and raved at
the quailing Configuration Man. "Not the kind of reaction I expected
from him."

January Frost shrugged. "He fought alongside the French Resistance in
Operation Dragoon. Quite the eye-opening experience, it seems."

FL nodded, and they walked off to check on the Peril Room.

"...and another thing!"

****

Author's Note: Yeah, this is basically just me putting a personal rant
into story form. But I hope it was at least interesting.

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, written in less than three hours.

Adrian J. McClure

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May 2, 2012, 5:58:20 PM5/2/12
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On May 2, 6:52 am, Andrew Perron <pwer...@gmail.com> wrote:
> Author's Note: Yeah, this is basically just me putting a personal rant
> into story form.  But I hope it was at least interesting.
>
XD

You know, I really want to see a Doc Nostalgia/Powernaut crossover
now.

> Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, written in less than three hours.

I wrote my RACCCafe story in thirty minutes. I REGRET NOTHING.

Scott Eiler

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May 2, 2012, 6:16:36 PM5/2/12
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On 05/02/2012 02:58 PM, Adrian J. McClure wrote:
> On May 2, 6:52 am, Andrew Perron<pwer...@gmail.com> wrote:
>> Author's Note: Yeah, this is basically just me putting a personal rant
>> into story form. But I hope it was at least interesting.
>>
> XD
>
> You know, I really want to see a Doc Nostalgia/Powernaut crossover
> now.

Oooh. As it happens, Powernaut 1944 is coming on the scopes - and it
has room for guest stars! Just one question for Doc Nostalgia 1944:
How good is he at surviving a hail of bullets from the Waffen-SS? :-D

Andrew Perron

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May 2, 2012, 6:36:06 PM5/2/12
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On Wed, 2 May 2012 21:58:20 +0000 (UTC), Adrian J. McClure wrote:

> You know, I really want to see a Doc Nostalgia/Powernaut crossover
> now.

YES! Nostalgia Bomb!

>> Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, written in less than three hours.
>
> I wrote my RACCCafe story in thirty minutes. I REGRET NOTHING.

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, damn, that's really good for half an
hour!

Scott Eiler

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May 2, 2012, 6:43:39 PM5/2/12
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On 05/02/2012 03:52 AM, Andrew Perron wrote:
> Bite-Size Tales of the LNH v20 #7:
> "First Republic"
> By Andrew Perron
>
> ****
>
> "World War II. Hitler is assassinated before he can break Nazi
> Germany's pact with Communist Russia. A combined Nazi-Soviet-Fascist
> force steamrolls, slowly but surely, through all defending forces.
> Britain falls, and once the Axis has spread across Europe, they make
> the leap across the Atlantic."

... I love this concept. I have never seen a serious what-if discussion
about it, though. I believe this to be a failure of serious what-if
discussions. The ones I see always go,

"What if Hitler...?"

"Hitler would never..."

"Well, what if someone else?"

"No one else would dare."

But a Nazi-Soviet-Japanese Super Axis was a very real concern to
everyone else back then.


> "Would you say," said Doc Nostalgia, pacing back and forth, seemingly
> relaxed, "that what happened is something you could reasonably call
> 'the US surrendering'?"
>
> "Well, uh, I mean, technically the government did--" Configuration Man
> squirmed as Doc Nostalgia looked at him. "Um, no."
>
> Doc Nostalgia nodded, turning away from Configuration Man. "And would
> you say this speaks to anything about the national character, and their
> tendency towards surrender?"
>
> "...no?"
>
> Doc Nostalgia spun around, eyes blazing, and smacked his hands down
> hard on the desk. "Then WHY, for the LOVE of EVERYTHING you hold dear,
> do you assume that JUST THAT ASSOCIATION holds true for FRANCE!?"

You know I believe the same way as Doc Nostalgia. But in fairness to
the opposing point of view... If the United States surrendered to the
Axis as thoroughly as France did, there'd have been plenty of U.S.
resistance movements, but we'd have seen all the following.

* Axis powers occupy the entire eastern and Gulf coasts.

* The entire remainder of the U.S. mainland joins the collaborationist
government.

* Overseas territories decide individually which way to go. For
example, Puerto Rico allows Axis planes to launch bombing runs from
there against the British Virgin Islands.

* FDR has to decide whether to retreat to Alaska or Hawaii.

* The *British* (well, probably the Australians by this point) attack
Pearl Harbor because they can't be sure the U.S. Pacific Fleet will
fight on against the Axis.

... all parallels to Vichy France and its territories.

Adrian J. McClure

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May 2, 2012, 6:44:26 PM5/2/12
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Well, if he's like Golden Age Superman than he can't be penetrated by
anything short of a bursting shell, so.

Scott Eiler

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May 2, 2012, 9:55:55 PM5/2/12
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On 5/2/2012 3:44 PM, Adrian J. McClure wrote:

>> Oooh. As it happens, Powernaut 1944 is coming on the scopes - and
>> it has room for guest stars! Just one question for Doc Nostalgia
>> 1944: How good is he at surviving a hail of bullets from the
>> Waffen-SS?
>
> Well, if he's like Golden Age Superman than he can't be penetrated by
> anything short of a bursting shell, so.

Ah, I see what the LNH Wiki says about him. But *that* leads to the
obvious next question. How come he didn't win the war in 1943?

In fairness, I can volunteer a couple of answers...

1. It usually requires control of territory to win a war. As shown in
Powernaut 1941, it usually requires more than one man to control territory.

2. Maybe Our Hero is the reason the war didn't last until 1946.

Along those lines, I admit I'm feeling an increasing need for the world
to read a Powernaut 1944 series. It won't be *next*, but I've actually
started work on it already. And this series is made for guest stars.
One of them could be Doc Nostalgia. And why stop there?

As we've seen, the Powernaut's history is a very loose thing. There's
no reason he can't team up with anyone from any universe, no background
questions asked.

So: Your Hero could be drawn into Powernaut 1944. Probably even get
his (or her) very own episode, full of him fighting the Axis! And you
get creator credit, of course, plus your series imprint when the episode
gets published. (For instance, Doc Nostalgia gets "LNH", or is it
"LNH20"?) Just point me at answers to these questions:

1. How's he dress for battle?

2. What are his powers?

3. How does he react to a hail of gunfire from the Waffen-SS?

4. How does he not win the war by 1943?

The Powernaut and several guest stars will spend this series
demonstrating their own answers to those questions. And I promise it'll
be as funny as war ever gets.

--
(signed) Scott Eiler 8{D> -------- http://www.eilertech.com/ ---------

Let's take a look, if you will, at the Second Amendment of the
Constitution, which protects every American's right to shoot another
American. This cherished constitutional right to shoot people and make
them dead is currently recognized in all fifty states, most recently
Florida.

- The Borowitz Report
(http://www.borowitzreport.com/2012/03/29/an-argument-against-healthcare/),
March 2012.

Andrew Perron

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May 3, 2012, 4:44:18 AM5/3/12
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On Wed, 2 May 2012 22:43:39 +0000 (UTC), Scott Eiler wrote:

> ... I love this concept. I have never seen a serious what-if discussion
> about it, though. I believe this to be a failure of serious what-if
> discussions.

To be fair, there could be some very real barriers that I didn't get into.
I'm not entirely sure.

> "Well, what if someone else?"
>
> "No one else would dare."
>
> But a Nazi-Soviet-Japanese Super Axis was a very real concern to
> everyone else back then.

Indeed! And I know I didn't really mention Japan.

> You know I believe the same way as Doc Nostalgia.

I suspected as much from the Powernaut!

> But in fairness to
> the opposing point of view... If the United States surrendered to the
> Axis as thoroughly as France did, there'd have been plenty of U.S.
> resistance movements, but we'd have seen all the following.
<snip list>

It's true - the sheer size of the US makes something like this hard to
accomplish. I suspect there's a lot of divergent details that Doc N didn't
get into.

> * The *British* (well, probably the Australians by this point) attack
> Pearl Harbor because they can't be sure the U.S. Pacific Fleet will
> fight on against the Axis.

Oh, man - I should totally have worked in Australians-as-Americans. (They
were the ones holding off Japan! That's it!)

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, poifect sense

Andrew Perron

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May 3, 2012, 5:23:38 AM5/3/12
to
On Thu, 3 May 2012 01:55:55 +0000 (UTC), Scott Eiler wrote:

> On 5/2/2012 3:44 PM, Adrian J. McClure wrote:
>
>>> Oooh. As it happens, Powernaut 1944 is coming on the scopes - and
>>> it has room for guest stars! Just one question for Doc Nostalgia
>>> 1944: How good is he at surviving a hail of bullets from the
>>> Waffen-SS?
> >
>> Well, if he's like Golden Age Superman than he can't be penetrated by
>> anything short of a bursting shell, so.
>
> Ah, I see what the LNH Wiki says about him. But *that* leads to the
> obvious next question. How come he didn't win the war in 1943?

I just figure there were a lot of superhumans on *both* sides. I don't
remember which setting it had that had superhuman battles as a "third
front" - probably ASH - but prolly something like that. Maybe with some
layer of clever metafiction, y'know?

> In fairness, I can volunteer a couple of answers...
>
> 1. It usually requires control of territory to win a war. As shown in
> Powernaut 1941, it usually requires more than one man to control territory.

There's definitely that.

> 2. Maybe Our Hero is the reason the war didn't last until 1946.

Yeah, that too. Battling Baron von
21st-Century-Culture-Needs-To-Stop-Associating-All-Germans-With-Nazis-Already.

> As we've seen, the Powernaut's history is a very loose thing. There's
> no reason he can't team up with anyone from any universe, no background
> questions asked.

Woo!

> (For instance, Doc Nostalgia gets "LNH", or is it
> "LNH20"?)

Definitely LNH20. And Adrian's the creator there.

> Just point me at answers to these questions:

Meanwhile, for my character, I'm-a go with the Classic LNH, and with a
character I already had show up in a World War II story: the immortal
statue, brought to life by magic, known to classics students the world over
as Galatea: http://www.lnhq.info/wiki/Galatea

> 1. How's he dress for battle?

In something a few decades and/or centuries out of date.

> 2. What are his powers?

Immortality, indestructibility, and thousands of years' worth of knowledge,
probably including mystic skills and how to operate every machine under the
sun.

> 3. How does he react to a hail of gunfire from the Waffen-SS?

T'would simply bounce off!

> 4. How does he not win the war by 1943?

Well, it takes a while for her to get involved - when you're thousands of
years old, you no longer feel like leaping in every time they decide to
hold a shindig, you know? Plus, her powers are relatively passive.

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, time to make pancakes.

Scott Eiler

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May 3, 2012, 4:10:31 PM5/3/12
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On 05/03/2012 01:44 AM, Andrew Perron wrote:
> On Wed, 2 May 2012 22:43:39 +0000 (UTC), Scott Eiler wrote:
>
>> ... I love this concept. I have never seen a serious what-if discussion
>> about it, though. I believe this to be a failure of serious what-if
>> discussions.
>
> To be fair, there could be some very real barriers that I didn't get into.
> I'm not entirely sure.

Well, there's one: Where's the Axis Navy? soc.history.what-if often
gets into religious wars about Operation Sealion for precisely that
reason. But I don't think this detail should detract from your story.
If the Red Army helps invade France, the Germans can concentrate on
building a navy.


>> * The *British* (well, probably the Australians by this point) attack
>> Pearl Harbor because they can't be sure the U.S. Pacific Fleet will
>> fight on against the Axis.
>
> Oh, man - I should totally have worked in Australians-as-Americans. (They
> were the ones holding off Japan! That's it!)

Well, mostly their tool for holding off Japan was Australia itself:
incredibly big to conquer, and out of the way to anywhere except New
Zealand. They needed American help to fight for everything else.

Scott Eiler

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May 3, 2012, 4:17:34 PM5/3/12
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Oooh, Galatea would fit the concept perfectly. I bet she'd be involved
about as soon as Axis troops appeared near the real Mount Olympus, but
she'd be more about saving artwork than saving mortals.

Scott Eiler

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May 3, 2012, 7:31:46 PM5/3/12
to
On 05/02/2012 06:55 PM, Scott Eiler wrote:
> On 5/2/2012 3:44 PM, Adrian J. McClure wrote:
>
>>> Oooh. As it happens, Powernaut 1944 is coming on the scopes - and
>>> it has room for guest stars! Just one question for Doc Nostalgia
>>> 1944: How good is he at surviving a hail of bullets from the
>>> Waffen-SS?
> >
>> Well, if he's like Golden Age Superman than he can't be penetrated by
>> anything short of a bursting shell, so.
>
> Ah, I see what the LNH Wiki says about him. But *that* leads to the
> obvious next question. How come he didn't win the war in 1943?
>
> In fairness, I can volunteer a couple of answers...
>
> 1. It usually requires control of territory to win a war. As shown in
> Powernaut 1941, it usually requires more than one man to control territory.
>
> 2. Maybe Our Hero is the reason the war didn't last until 1946.

I thought of one more. If his power is measured in terms of speeding
bullets, locomotives, and tall buildings... those are all things the
Germans have. So (for instance) Doc Nostalgia can probably stop a
train, as long as it's not pulled by *two* locomotives. This could be
an important concept to remind World War 2 comic strip fans of. 8{D>

Andrew Perron

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May 4, 2012, 2:04:22 AM5/4/12
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On Thu, 3 May 2012 20:17:34 +0000 (UTC), Scott Eiler wrote:

> Oooh, Galatea would fit the concept perfectly. I bet she'd be involved
> about as soon as Axis troops appeared near the real Mount Olympus, but
> she'd be more about saving artwork than saving mortals.

Makes sense! Though it's not that she doesn't *care* about mortals. It's
just in a sort of distant, abstract way most of the time. Sort of like how
most people care about the environment.

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, darn mortals.

Andrew Perron

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May 4, 2012, 3:23:37 AM5/4/12
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On Thu, 3 May 2012 20:10:31 +0000 (UTC), Scott Eiler wrote:

> On 05/03/2012 01:44 AM, Andrew Perron wrote:

<snip>
>> To be fair, there could be some very real barriers that I didn't get into.
>> I'm not entirely sure.
>
> Well, there's one: Where's the Axis Navy? soc.history.what-if often
> gets into religious wars about Operation Sealion for precisely that
> reason. But I don't think this detail should detract from your story.
> If the Red Army helps invade France, the Germans can concentrate on
> building a navy.

Makes sense, makes sense - hell, for all my talk of bombers and overland
attacks, that'd probably be the biggest factor in an attack on the US.

>> Oh, man - I should totally have worked in Australians-as-Americans. (They
>> were the ones holding off Japan! That's it!)
>
> Well, mostly their tool for holding off Japan was Australia itself:
> incredibly big to conquer, and out of the way to anywhere except New
> Zealand. They needed American help to fight for everything else.

Oh, sure. But what I mean was, Japan decided to expend resources there
instead of going after US outposts, once they saw that the Eastern Front
had the US distracted.

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, sure, sure, why not...

Scott Eiler

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May 5, 2012, 6:01:04 PM5/5/12
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Yeah, I can see Japan getting bogged down in Australia, once their army gets free from conquering China. They'd much rather invade India, but they *had* to hold on to the Dutch East Indies.

Sent from my HTC Touch Pro2 on the Now Network from Sprint®.

Scott Eiler

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May 11, 2012, 10:37:39 PM5/11/12
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I finally found the Galatea World War 2 story, which showed her fighting
Japan toward the end of the war. I think that'll be outside the scope
of the Powernaut 1944 story. Though I might put in a reference toward
the end.

Andrew Perron

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May 14, 2012, 2:10:32 PM5/14/12
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On Sat, 12 May 2012 02:37:39 +0000 (UTC), Scott Eiler wrote:

> I finally found the Galatea World War 2 story, which showed her fighting
> Japan toward the end of the war. I think that'll be outside the scope
> of the Powernaut 1944 story. Though I might put in a reference toward
> the end.

Well, one can't assume that that's the only battle she participated in.
Her meeting with the Powernaut might be at the beginning of her
participation in the war.

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, zoot zoot

Scott Eiler

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May 14, 2012, 9:54:04 PM5/14/12
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Good points. I'm about to take this discussion off line, though. Not
that I mind writing a story by committee, but then who'll read it?

I've plotted the Powernaut 1944 series. I could e-mail some 24-Minute
Web Comic artwork to contributors for review if you like. (You
listening, Adrian?) Of course, that might ruin the surprise...

Andrew Perron

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May 15, 2012, 5:49:49 AM5/15/12
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On Tue, 15 May 2012 01:54:04 +0000 (UTC), Scott Eiler wrote:

> Good points. I'm about to take this discussion off line, though. Not
> that I mind writing a story by committee, but then who'll read it?

Steve Englehart!

> I've plotted the Powernaut 1944 series. I could e-mail some 24-Minute
> Web Comic artwork to contributors for review if you like. (You
> listening, Adrian?) Of course, that might ruin the surprise...

Ooooo. Yay.

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, engsmsplosion!
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