TP-What to Prepare For[14 of 18][FanFic]

[Twister]

Chapter Fourteen
----------------

On Saturday, Twister teleported to the Tendo dojo for another lesson
from Ranma. Nabiki was too busy with homework and meeting new friends to
join him this weekend, but she was planning to go back on the next weekend
or the one after that.
Twister had spent a fair amount of time the day before going over
all that he had been taught. In male form, since a perfect memory helped a
lot. Twister also went over that little battle with the physical
education group. As a result of all this, he was a little improved than
where he had been the week before, which surprised Ranma slightly.
Twister managed to get a few good hits in before quitting and
Ranma-chan looked impressed.
"What did you do? Practice every day?"
"No. I just tried going over everything you have taught me." Twister
was in female form as she was accustomed to practicing with it. She had not
told Ranma-chan about the little fight she had in male form since Twister was
still a little uncertain about fighting like that.
"It works." Ranma-chan chuckled, "At least we didn't destroy the
practice room this time."
"Do you mind if I stay around for another lesson Sunday?"
"What's the rush? At the rate you're going, it'll only take a few
more sessions before I have to start you on 'special' moves. _Then_ these
fights will get really interesting."
Looking a little worried, Twister sighed, "It's just that I feel like
I'm going to _need_ the extra practice. Ah, well, it's likely nothing."
Not terribly convinced, Ranma-chan let it go. "All right."
With more cheer, Twister smiled, "Anyway, I had the thought of going
to Shampoo's restaurant after I change. I'm hoping the noodles there will
restore my faith in pasta. Care to join me?" She grinned.
Ranma-chan winced and looked sourly at her, "I'd better stay here,
thanks. Akane's still steamed. Stupid tomboy."
Twister was curious about, but decided she really didn't want to know
right now.

A bell called out the entrance of a new customer and Shampoo looked
up eagerly. She was disappointed that it wasn't Ranma, but still happy to
see someone she thought of as a friend. Despite the fact she had wanted
to kill him for a while.
"Twister! Shampoo happy to see!"
He smiled back at Shampoo. "Me too. It's been a while." Twister sat
at a table. "Care to take an order? I decided to have something here since I
didn't recall ever eating here."
Shampoo nodded. "Shampoo not recall Twister do so. What like?"
Smiling, Twister told her what he wanted and she quickly walked away
into the back. He looked around, but failed to see Mousse anywhere.
*Hm. I guess he can't be in here _all_ the time.*
A delicious smell drew Twister's attention and he saw Shampoo come out
with a steaming bowl of noodles. The aroma dispelled any revulsion he might
have felt towards the great-looking pasta dish. She placed it in front of him
and smiled as he slowly and delightfully finished the meal.
Twister sighed happily. "Ahhh. My condition against noodles is
cured."
"Condition?" Shampoo puzzledly asked.
"Long story." He held up an empty glass that was on his table and
smiled. "Could you get me some water, please?"
Still puzzled, she nodded, left for the kitchen, and returned with
a big pitcher of ice water.
As Shampoo poured, Mousse suddenly rushed in crying Shampoo's name.
He quickly ran past her, bumping her in the process, and hugged a startled
customer who was about to leave. This resulted in Mousse receiving a slap
and an angry retort from the girl.
With a little contempt, Shampoo addressed Mousse, "Should wear
glasses, stupid duck-boy."
Mousse did so and spied who was sitting near where Shampoo was
standing. "Ranma! You dare come near my future bride!" Shampoo started and
looked at where she had accidentally spilled cold water from her pitcher.
Before Mousse could attack, the now-female Twister calmly said, "Try
it and I'll drag you through town again for _another_ three hours, Mousse."
Seeing the absence of a pig-tail and hearing Twister's response,
Mousse immediately calmed down. "Oh, it's just you, Twister."
Shampoo was looking apologetic. "Shampoo sorry, Twister. Clumsy
Mousse cause Shampoo to get Twister all wet..." Her voice trailed off as
she noticed Twister's still dry looking clothing. "Clothes _not_ wet!
How Twister do that?"
"Just enchanted them so that a very thin layer of air protects them
from spills and such. No biggie." Twister shrugged as she stood up. "Mind if
I go in back for some hot water?"
Looking envious, Shampoo agreed, "Not mind. Wish Shampoo could use
for own clothes." An idea struck her. "Can Twister make same for Shampoo?
Pay for meal."
Thoughtfully, Twister pondered the question. "I don't see why not.
I'll just enchant some salt. A tablespoon should manage _one_ set of
clothing in a large amount of _warm_ water. After it dries, it'll work
for about a week, or so I imagine. Just don't try more than one tablespoon
since I think that might make it last longer." Twister thought to herself
about the spell, *The Professor described this sort of one-shot enchantment
recently in class so the salt itself should keep the magic, until used of
course.*
Excitedly, Shampoo led Twister to the back and found a fair bit of
salt to her to enchant. That done, Twister used some hot water and changed
back. With a happy good-bye, Shampoo waved to Twister as he left.
She smiled. "Now Shampoo not worry about clothes in kitchen."
Sitting at a table, Mousse had heard their conversation about the
spell and got an idea. He sneaked into the kitchen with a small smile.
About an hour later, Mousse returned to the restaurant.
Wearing his glasses for once, he called out, "Shampoo! I will
kill Ranma today and then there will be no obstacle between you and I!"
Furious, because this was the second time today Mousse had barged in
like this, Shampoo came out with a pitcher of water. "Shampoo not think
so, duck-boy!" She swiftly threw the icy contents at the confident Mousse and
splashed him.
No effect.
Smiling now, Mousse reaffirmed his promise, "I now have the means to
do so! I will be back soon!" He left the store and was out of sight when
Shampoo ran out to find him.
She was shocked at the lack of success of the cold water. *Now how
did Mousse do _that_?* Thinking back, she tried to remember what Mousse could
have done to prevent the change from happening.
Then it hit her.
*Mousse's clothes were not _wet_!* Shampoo mentally kicked herself.
*Of course. Mousse was here when I asked Twister for that enchantment.*
Rushing to the back she saw that a third of the enchanted salt had been
taken. *Must have used it all to take a bath.* Eyes narrowing, Shampoo
started getting angry.
*So Mousse stole from me? Two can play the same game.*

Ranma and Twister were sitting by the pond, just talking.
"So Akane's peeved at you now?"
Embarrassed, Ranma looked away, "Now why should I care what that tomboy
thinks of me?"
Twister wasn't convinced, "Riiight. Sure. I believe you." *NOT!* "How
mad is she?"
"Pretty mad." Ranma sighed as he threw a small stone into the pond.
"I checked at her window and she threw her desk at me without a word."
"Desk?! How...?" Twister shook his head over geometric impossibilities.
"Never mind. Hm. I would say that's pretty mad." He saw Ranma's depressed face.
"You know... For someone you keep saying you don't like, you sure don't look
too happy about it."
Starting to deny it, Ranma was interrupted by a voice rapidly approaching
them.
"RANMA! Prepare to meet your doom!"
Both Ranma and Twister leaped into the air as various bladed
projectiles landed in the general area where they had been.
"Yow! Watch it, Mousse!" Twister exclaimed as he landed near the
house. "_Must_ you play with sharp objects? And why did you try to hit
_both_ of us?!"
Ignoring Twister, Mousse focused his attention on Ranma, who landed
near the pond's opposite edge.
"Now I will finally defeat you, Saotome!"
Ranma was not impressed. "Give it a rest, Mousse! How many times must
you keep doing this?"
"If destroying you is the only way to make Shampoo forget you, then
I will do what I must."
As Mousse and Ranma did the customary exchanging of various assorted
insults prior to fighting, Twister casually leaned on the side of
the house.
*This is fun. I can see it now. '_See_ the fight of the century!
_Watch_ as the combatants try to pound the other into a pulp. _Hear_ the
endless chatter before the fight even begins!' Jeez, I wonder if they've
memorized this stuff by now.*
The racket by the pond was now catching the interest of Genma and
Soun, who finally looked up from their game of Go to watch the coming fight.
Also, while Kasumi stayed in the kitchen, Akane finally came down to
reluctantly see what was going on with Ranma.
As she came up to stand by Twister, she asked, "What's with Mousse,
Twister?"
"Dunno. He seems pretty confident for some reason."
Ranma and Mousse apparently had finished the preliminaries and Ranma
waited for Mousse to make the first move. Surprisingly, Mousse jumped to
clear the pond towards Ranma.
Ranma jumped to counter him, *What's he doing? Isn't he worried that
he'll get wet and change?* When they were about to collide, Ranma kicked out
at Mousse. In another surprising move, Mousse merely dodged and grabbed
Ranma's leg. They collided and momentum to carry them to safety died.
Both dropped into the pond with a splash.
Ranma-chan came up sputtering and looked around to shout at
Mousse-duck. Nothing was floating on the pond though. She was puzzled.
*Where'd he go?*
A disturbance in the water before her caught her attention. Slowly,
before everybody's astonished eyes, a still-human Mousse stood up from the
pond and smiled.
"Now you will truly pay, Saotome!" He leaped from the pond towards
Ranma-chan who scrambled out of the way, too surprised to do much.
"How did Mousse manage not to change?" Akane got out in her shock.
Getting no response, she looked at Twister and got another surprise. He
was pale and staring at Mousse.
"Dry. Still dry. Oh, no." Twister was muttering. "That idiot."
Akane looked at Mousse again and saw that Twister was right. Even
after being dipped in the pond, Mousse was still completely dry.
*What on Earth?*
Meanwhile, Ranma-chan was really starting to get pounded because
she was still surprised over Mousse not changing into a duck, distracting
her. The kicks she _did_ land on Mousse didn't seem to effect him quite as
much as they used to either. This surprised Mousse a little as well, but he
decided to take advantage of the fact as he continued his assault.
Worriedly, Akane watched. "Ranma's blows don't seem to affecting
Mousse as much anymore."
Groaning, Twister explained what must have happened, "Akane, I was at
Shampoo's today to try the noodles there. When Shampoo saw my water and
stain-proof clothes, she asked if I could make something to protect her own
because of the kitchen. I agreed." He sighed. "All it does is protect anything
totally immersed in the solution with a thin film of air. Mousse was there
at the time and must have taken some of the stuff I enchanted. Also, the
reason the blows aren't affecting him as much is that the film of air is
cushioning him slightly."
With growing horror, Akane heard this story, "So Ranma is at a
disadvantage right now! What should we do?"
"MOUSSE!"
Raising his eyebrows, Twister remarked, "I think the injured party
who just arrived will save Ranma's bacon." He saw Shampoo biking rapidly
towards the two splashing fighters. "After all, it _was_ intended for her
clothes."
A thrown mace that hit Mousse in the head got his attention and
distracted him enough for a battered Ranma-chan to kick him to the other
side of the pond. Coming back up, Mousse faced an angry Shampoo who
jumped off her bike and leaped into the pond. She too didn't change.
"Uh, oh. She's on the rampage." Twister fairly accurately stated as
Shampoo's face revealed her anger.
From the Go table, Soun calmly said, "It's a good thing the fish are
not in the pond right now."
Genma nodded, "Indeed."
"Ranma nearly gets killed and all you can think about are fish?!"
Akane shouted to the seated pair.
"They _are_ hard to replace." Soun shrugged.
Mt. Akane was ready to blow when Twister chuckled, "No fish? Hmm.
I think it's time to stir the pot then." Turning, she saw Twister intently
looking at the pond.
Akane was puzzled, "Twister, you can't affect water. Remember?"
"Who said anything about the water? It's the _rocks_ I'm heating up
in a hurry." Mist was starting to form above the pond as a tired
Ranma-chan, and an angry Shampoo fighting a reluctant Mousse, waded in it.
Groggily, Ranma-chan wondered at the change of temperature in the
water. *It is just me or is the water getting warmer?* Forming mist helped
bring Ranma-chan to full awareness. *It is! But...* She saw a concerned Akane
and a staring Twister and realized what was going on. *He's heating the water
somehow! Yes!* Ranma-chan dived under the water when it started feeling warm.
Shielded by their films of air, Shampoo and Mousse didn't really notice
the water temperature difference. Neither had really injured the other just
yet because of the dragging effect of the water and their thin shields of air.
With a SWOOSH, Ranma in male form suddenly shot up right beside a
startled Mousse and put all his remaining strength into a surprise
punch. Mousse was knocked out of the water and landed flat on his back,
dazed.
Sighing with relief, Ranma collapsed on the edge of the pond and
lay there breathing heavily. Twister, Akane, and Shampoo rushed up to see
if he was okay.
Shampoo looked embarrassed, "Sorry, Twister. Mousse stole clothing
protector when I not looking. Bad for Ranma."
"Ranma? Are you okay?" Akane kneeled over an eyes-closed Ranma.
He weakly opened his eyes, "I'm okay. Just tired. What's with Mousse
anyway?" He shakily sat up. "And Shampoo for that matter."
"My fault. I made something to help save Shampoo's clothes from
kitchen accidents, but Mousse found another use for it." He saw Shampoo's
still sad face, "Don't worry about it. In fact, I'm sorry to say, you and
Mousse have already paid a fairly high price. How much did you use on
yourself?"
"Two teaspoons. One for clothes and one for Shampoo." She looked
puzzled now. "Mousse used much more than that, Shampoo think."
Regaining his strength, Mousse stood up, "What are you talking about?
I see no price for this!"
With a smirk, Twister walked over to face an uncomprehending Mousse.
"Ah, but there _is_ Mousse. Shampoo's second skin will last a week. Yours...
Much longer depending on how much you used. I _did_ mention something
about it lasting longer if you used more." He walked back to stand by a now
upright Ranma, who had with Akane supporting him. "The _least_ is that the
skin feels a little...confining as I tried a much shorter lasting
enchantment once. Too uncomfortable for me and it wouldn't work on this
form anyway. Another, is the slipperiness of the air skin. Shampoo must
have had a hard time coming here on her bike with her mace and _you_,
Mousse, couldn't aim your weapons very well for the same reason. I'm
amazed Shampoo managed to hit you with her mace. You both must`ve found
everything slightly slippery." Shampoo and Mousse reluctantly nodded at
that truth.
Taking a deep breath, Twister broke the bad news, "The _worst_ part
is that _water_ can't touch you!" Everybody looked confused as Twister
explained, "It's _fine_ for a day or two on humans, but this spell was for
_clothes_! YOU CAN'T CLEAN YOURSELVES OFF!" Comprehension dawned on everyone
as Mousse and Shampoo started to look horrified, "After two or three days,
you two will...um...be a little noticeable. Shampoo will only have to deal
with it about four or five days. _You_, however, Mousse, will have to deal
with it a lot longer than that. Maybe two weeks or more. I'm not sure."
"Can Twister not disenchant?" Shampoo looked desperate.
He shook his head, "I tried that once on a diamond. I disenchanted it
all right. Unfortunately, I also _disintegrated_ it too. I'm still new
at this."
Mousse took the news quietly before replying, "I see. Then I will
train outside town as best I can until this spell wears off. I am sorry
to have stolen your spell from Shampoo, Twister. _But_, I will be back
to be with her once it has." He abruptly turned around and walked away
out of sight.
"Sorry, Shampoo." Twister apologized.
Sighing, Shampoo shrugged, "Is price must pay for carelessness.
Besides," Shampoo added with an imp-like gleam in her eye, "Shampoo think
likely great-grandmother can disenchant. Too bad Mousse leave before
Shampoo think about it." She smiled a little wickedly.
"True. Cologne might be able to do that, but I _will_ make some new
stuff that will only work on clothes. I should have put _some_ thought
into that first spell."
"Shampoo thank Twister. Now..." A implike gleam shone in Shampoo's
eyes as she looked at a recovering Ranma. "Shampoo get thanks from Ranma."
Rushing up before Akane could react, Shampoo hugged Ranma and kissed him.
Twister held back Akane with a smile and whispered, "Wait..."
Shampoo looked like she was in bliss, but awareness came quickly as
she realized something with horror. Releasing Ranma, she ran to the bike,
carefully got on, and biked away, leaving a laughing Twister and a puzzled
Akane and Ranma behind.
Confused, Akane asked Twister, "What happened to Shampoo? That wasn't
what I expected her to act like."
"Remember that film of air?" Twister got out, "She couldn't feel
Ranma's lips _at all_. Just the pressure of them. Must have felt like
kissing a greased pole." He continued laughing.
Nodding, Ranma agreed, "That's pretty close. I could hardly feel much
though it."
"So Shampoo can't kiss Ranma now." Akane smiled.
"Yup. Ah, well. I'll have to think a bit more about my spells now."
"I don't mind." said a now widely-smiling Akane. "She needed _something_
to happen to her after _last_ time."
"Ah! So _that's_ why you were mad. Well, what goes around comes
around." He viewed Ranma carefully, "Almost feeling human?"
Nodding, Ranma managed to start walking towards the house. "I'm okay
now."
With a small tap, Akane hit Ranma and he fell over. "Okay, huh?"
She said sarcastically.
"I _would_ be if a certain tomboy would stop doing that!"
Twister put a hand on Akane's shoulder to prevent her retort,
"Let's get the helpless invalid to bed, hmm? There you two can rant and
rave at each other in the privacy a room and not disturb the players over
there." He gestured at Genma and Soun.
"Thank you, Twister. That's very considerate of you." Genma said from
his contemplation of the Go game and Soun nodded.
Rolling his eyes, Twister got Ranma back up and he and Akane got him
moving. The two were glaring at their fathers as they were guided by Twister
upstairs. They got to the room and carefully set down Ranma. Quickly, before
either could react, Twister did a silent teleport and came back just as
quickly with a small device. With a slight smile, he pressed the play
button on the tape player and shouting voices came out of the device.
"Pervert!"
"Tomboy!"
"Peeping Tom!"
And so on...
The voices were obviously Twister and Nabiki's.
Seeing Akane and Ranma's outraged faces, Twister grinned and explained.
"Nabiki and I thought that it might be easier for you two if we did a
substitute recording argument for you two to play. _That_ eliminates a
lot of the effort, don't you think? See ya!" He teleported to the guest room
in a hurry.
Laughing.

Sunday rolled around and Ranma appeared okay enough to practice with
Twister. He and Akane seemed pretty quiet today compared to yesterday's
hate-fest. Apparently the tape recording worked like he and Nabiki had planned.
The two's constant and exactly the same arguments _were_ a little
repetitive. Must have gotten it through their heads. Finally. And maybe
something else...
After practice, Ranma-chan and Twister just sat in the training room,
resting till Ranma-chan got enough energy to leave the room.
She sighed and rubbed a bruise from the fight with Mousse, "I guess
college is a lot calmer than around here. Right, Twister?" The helpless
laughter this provoked from Twister surprised her. "I guess not."
"Whoo!" Twister calmed down. "Anything _but_! Whatever you got Ranma,
I think I caught it. 'Dull' it is not." She proceeded to describe the various
events that had happened to her since getting to college. Twister concluded
with, "I think the most unnerving thing was the attempt those two hentai
pulled to try to get pictures of me undressed. If I hadn't smelled the chemical
I wouldn't have been able to counter it in time. Born male or not."
"You're pulling my leg." said a disbelieving Ranma-chan.
"Aha! I knew you wouldn't believe it! I've have to bring the vial
sometime to prove it. It's _potent_. Even _you_ would be affected. I know _I_
would have soon, knowing or not."
Ranma-chan snorted. "Hmp. That I'd like to see."
Twister just smiled.
Around midday, Twister left back for college after saying his
good-byes. He was getting better at doing silent teleports and could do them
almost as fast as the normal ones he had done before.
Yasuro looked around from his computer screen when he heard Twister's
door open. "Have fun visiting?"
"A fair bit. Some excitement happened, but that's the usual there."
Straight-faced, Yasuro turned back to his computer. "Not at all like
here, of course."
He got a cushion in the head for that one.

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Darren Steffler a.k.a "Twister"- mail at <umst...@cc.umanitoba.ca>
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