[Fanfict] Ranma 1/2
Night of Summer Side...
[Comments/questions to gall...@Arizona.EDU, subject: "Ranma 1/2 #2"]
Ranma 1/2 - Better late than never. (The delayed reaction episode.)
[Morning at the Tendo household. The birds are chirping lazily, Kasumi's
making breakfast, and, as usual, Ranma and Genma are outside fighting.]
Ranma: Hey! When are you going to give up, old man?! You can't beat me!
[Ranma suddenly jumps and attacks. Genma quickly counters and sends Ranma
flying into the pond.]
Genma: When you learn to be more careful. Wha...? [is cut off as he
finds himself suddenly underwater.]
Ranma-chan: What was that about being careful?
Kasumi: [from inside] Breakfast is ready! Ranma, go upstairs and get
Akane!
Ranma-chan: [sullen] Hai...
[Ranma-chan starts to head inside before she is smashed by Panda's sign,
which of course reads "Careless." Cut to about 5 minutes later with
Ranma-chan walking, slowly, upstairs and nursing a bump on her head.]
Ranma-chan: [winces] Ow! Why does Akane have to sleep forever? It _can't_
be beauty sleep, that's for sure... Ulp. [didn't notice where
she was going and suddenly finds herself face-to-face with
Akane] Uhh... I.. was just coming up here to wake you up...
Akane: [notices Ranma-chan's bump and smiles sweetly] You were? Well, thank
you.
Ranma-chan: [surprised] Uh... yeah. Kasumi says breakfast is ready, by the
way.
Akane: Ok. Tell her I'll be down in a bit.
Ranma-chan: Hai. [turns around and begins down the stairs, and then is
"helped" down when Akane smashes her in the back of the head
with her bokken. Ranma-chan tumbles down the stairs and lands
on her head.]
Akane: [stomps off back to her room] Jerk.
Ranma-chan: [Now pulling herself into a upside-down meditation position and
folding her arms over her chest] I don't know why I put up with
such an uncute girl.
Panda: [sign] Because she's your fiancee.
Ranma-chan: [glares] Who asked you??
[Akane comes downstairs and joins everyone eating breakfast. She glares
at Ranma-chan every so often who glares back. Finally, after breakfast is
finished, Akane goes outside while Ranma-chan heads upstairs. Soun and
Genma pull out the shogi board and begin playing while Nabiki helps Kasumi
clear away the dishes. It seems like just another normal day at the Tendo
household...]
Ranma-chan: [noticing the bumps on her head have disappeared] I guess I'll
have to take a bath now. Sometimes I really hate this body.
[Ranma-chan enters the bath, but before she touches the water, Happosai
flies into the room headed straight for Ranma-chan's chest.]
Happosai: Yippee!!! Urk.... [meets Ranma-chan's fist in his face in mid-
air and then is thrown out the window]
Ranma-chan: Doesn't he EVER learn? [sighs and steps into the hot water]
[After a while, Ranma emerges from the bath feeling a bit more refreshed.
He dries off, gets dressed, and heads outside to find Akane.]
Ranma: [entering the dojo] What are you doing in here?
Akane: [stopping her exercising to glare at Ranma] What does it _look_ like
I'm doing?
Ranma: Why do you continue to do this? No one is going to want an unfeminine
girl for a ... [all of a sudden falls over unconscious]
Akane: [getting ready to pound Ranma, now very concerned] Ranma? Hello? Are
you ok? Ranma?? [Ranma doesn't stir.] Kasumi-oneechan!!! Help!!
Kasumi: [running into the dojo] What happened?? Are you ok??
Akane: It's Ranma... he just... fainted.
Kasumi: Father!! Saotome-ojisama!! Hurry!!
[By now, everyone has arrived on the scene and huddles around Ranma as he
slowly regains consciousness. He finally focuses on Akane and his eyes
narrow.]
Ranma: What'd you DO to me???
Akane: Idiot! I didn't do anything!
Ranma: You jerk! You had to... [falls unconscious again]
[Everyone looks at each other with definite surprise.]
Akane: [blinks] ...
Panda: [sign] How unusual.
Ranma: [stirring] Wha... What happened?
Nabiki: You seem to have fainted.
Ranma: [blinks] Fainted? C'mon, give me a break.
Akane: It's true! None of us touched you; you just ... fainted.
Soun: Hmmmmm. I think we should make a visit to Tofu-sensei.
Ranma: [sighs] But there's nothing wrong with me!!
[Cut to later that day. Ranma and Akane are headed to Tofu-sensei's
place. Ranma is, as usual, walking on the fence.]
Ranma: I _still_ don't see why I need to go be checked on by Tofu-sensei.
I tell you there's nothing wrong with me!
Akane: I don't know... I think I could at least make a list... [giggles]
Ranma: [sticks his toungue out] Least there's nothing wrong with my looks.
Akane: Jerk!
Ranma: Unfeminine! [suddenly loses consciousness and falls into the river]
Akane: Ranma!! [sighs] What an idiot.
[Akane pulls Ranma-chan out of the river and half-drags, half-carries her
the rest of the way to Tofu-sensei's. By the time they arrive, Ranma-chan
has regained consciousness.]
Ranma-chan: [groans] Ow. What hap... no, let me guess. I slipped off the
rail.
Akane: [shakes head] Well.. not exactly.
Tofu: [entering waiting room] Konnichiwa! What brings you two here today?
Akane: Ranma has been having fainting spells, sensei.
Ranma-chan: [indignantly] I have NOT!
Akane: Shut up! You don't know what you're talking about!
Ranma-chan: Idiot! [promptly faints]
Akane: See what I mean?
Tofu: Hmmm. Well, let's see. [picks up the prone Ranma-chan and lays her
on a bed. He examines Ranma-chan's head] Hmmm. Has she been hit on
the head recently?
Akane: [flashback to beaning Ranma with the bokken earlier that day] Uhh...
yes. She did complain about being hit on the back of the head. I
think she and her father were practicing a little too hard this
morning.
Tofu: [flashes a smile of recognition] Ok! Let me go find a cure for this.
Be right back. [to himself] Sounds like Akane hit him a little too
hard this morning... [chuckles]
Ranma-chan: [stirring as Tofu leaves the room] Oh boy. At this rate, I may
have to carry pillows to fall onto.
Kasumi: [entering room] Konnichiwa! Oh! Hello, Akane! Dinner will be ready
in a couple of hours. I was just returning this book I borrowed on
herbs. [smiles] How is Ranma?
Tofu: [returning with a small slip of paper] Now here's the rememdy for
Ranma's condition... [notices Kasumi - glasses fog over] Kasumi-san!
Hello!! Coincidental that I am here at the same time as you! How was
your walk over here? [begins tearing up Ranma's remedy]
Kasumi: [watches Tofu rip up the remedy and smiles] I'm fine, thank you
very much. Am I interrupting anything?
Tofu: [smiles] Oh not at all! [turns to Betty-chan] Please bring some tea
for us.
Akane: [looks at the remains of the remedy on the floor and sighs]
C'mon Ranma. Let's go.
Ranma-chan: [shakes her head] Sometimes I just can't believe him.
[Tofu is still babbling while Kasumi watches and listens as Akane and
Ranma-chan quietly slip outside. On their way home, Akane explains to
Ranma-chan what Tofu told her.]
Akane: ... so that's the whole story.
Ranma-chan: So those bumps on my head cause my fainting at random times?
Akane: I'm afraid so.
Ranma-chan: This wouldn't have happened if you weren't so unfeminine...
[slowly collapses at Akane's feet]
Akane: Damn you!
Ryouga: [appearing from around the corner] Ranma!! You DARE insult
Akane-san?!? For this, you must DIE!!!
[Ryouga charges Ranma-chan, intent on inflicting major pain on her just as
Ranma-chan gets up from her latest fainting spell. Ranma-chan barely avoids
Ryouga's attack and flips over him, while Ryouga, not able to stop himself
in time, plows through a nearby wall.]
Ranma-chan: Jerk!! What's gotten into you??
Ryouga: You have insulted Akane-san's honor! I will KILL YOU!!! [charges at
Ranma-chan, who by now is quite ready for him. At the last second,
she side-steps Ryouga's attack and trips him, sending him into the
mud.]
Ranma-chan: Suits you just fine... only pigs wallow in the mud, eh *P-chan*?
Ryouga: [getting up, sputtering] Why you...!!
Akane: [watching this entire scene realises something] Ranma!! That's it!!
Ranma-chan: [turns to look at Akane] What?? [realises that Ryouga is almost
on top of her and back kicks Ryouga back into the wall.]
[Akane grabs Ranma-chan by the pony tail and runs back up the street. Ryouga
gets up and attempts to follow.]
Ryouga: Come back here, coward!!
Ranma-chan: What are you doing, idiot?? Can't you see this is a man-to-man...
[faints]
Akane: [to herself] Jerk. This is for your own good.
Ryouga: [yelling] Come back here!
[Ryouga, unfortunately, loses Akane and Ranma after only turning down two
streets. Akane and the unconscious Ranma-chan head back to Tofu's place,
while Ryouga finds himself in a construction zone.]
Ryouga: Ranma!! Where are you hiding...? [bangs a beam with his umbrella
causing the beam to bend, and ultimately cave in. The structure that
was relying on that particular beam for support suddenly collapses
on top of a water tanker, which, in turn, explodes, showering
everyone.]
P-chan: [soaked] Bwee.
[Back at Tofu-sensei's office, Ranma-chan and Akane find Tofu-sensei fixing
Betty-chan's leg. Panda is there as well already, sweeping the floor. Upon
seeing Akane and Ranma-chan, he puts the broom down, picks up a tray and
walks into another room.]
Tofu: Did the remedy work?
Akane: Um... not exactly, but I think I've found something interesting.
Ranma seems to only faint after insulting someone.
Ranma-chan: Jerk! I do not... [faints]
Tofu: I see. [scratches head thoughtfully]
Akane: Is there anything you can do?
Tofu: First, I need to test a theory. We need to wake Ranma up. [presses
a nerve in Ranma-chan's neck, and she immediately wakes up]
Ranma-chan: [screams in pain] Yeeeeoooww!!!
Tofu: Ranma, I need to test something. Insult me.
Ranma-chan: What?? I ... can't do that, Tofu-sensei!
[Panda enters with several cups of tea and a teapot on his tray.]
Tofu: Then how about Saotome-kun?
Ranma-chan: He's enough of an insult as it is. Besides, I wouldn't HAVE
this "problem" if he didn't keep butting in!
[Panda bangs Ranma-chan over the head with a sign that says "Mind your
manners!"]
Ranma-chan: ...
Tofu: Hmmm. It seems that it's not just insulting ANYONE that makes you
faint.
Akane: [suddenly remembering Ranma-chan's fight earlier] That's right! You
insulted Ryouga-kun, and you didn't faint!
Ranma-chan: [sits up with the sign still sitting on her head] So... what
are you getting at?
Tofu: It seems that your fainting is a direct psychological response to your
own actions. In other words, you're fainting because you know you're
doing something wrong.
Ranma-chan: [folds arms over chest] And what could that be?
Tofu: [pauses] I don't know. You'll have to find out for yourself.
Akane: [gets up to leave] Well, I think it's about dinnertime. C'mon,
Ranma.
Ranma-chan: [gets off the bed] Ok. [starts to follow Akane out and is
detained by Tofu-sensei]
Tofu: [whispers to Ranma-chan] Maybe you ought to start by being nice to
Akane. You do realize that every time you've fainted, it's because
you've insulted her.
Ranma-chan: [blinks] ... Am I... Will I... always be like this? Can you
find a cure?
Tofu: [pats Ranma-chan on the head] Just try and be nice to her. You'll
find that at least you'll faint less. [grins]
[Ranma-chan leaves Tofu's office and finds Akane waiting for her outside.
The two start their trek home.]
Akane: What did Tofu-sensei say?
Ranma-chan: That I might be stuck this way for the rest of my life. [sighs]
Akane: You know, it's not really so bad after all. I mean, you could be
physically disabled or something. Instead, all you have to do is
stop being mean to people.
Ranma-chan: [sullen] Yeah, I guess you're right.
Akane: [blinks in surprise and stops walking] I'm _what_?
Ranma-chan: [still walking home] You're right.
Akane: [blinks again and then rushes up to Ranma-chan] Are you feeling ok?
[presses her hand to Ranma-chan's forehead] Hmmm... no fever or
anything.
Ranma-chan: [gently pushes Akane away] I'm not sick.
Akane: [looks at Ranma-chan intensely] Then... what is it?
Ranma-chan: [glances at Akane and then looks at the ground] Well...
P-chan: [accidentally running into Akane] Bwee!!
Akane: P-chan!! [smiles and grabs P-chan and holds him tightly to her chest
at the extreme annoyance of Ranma-chan]
[Ranma-chan turns away at the picture and jumps up on the fence to finish the
walk home. Akane notices Ranma-chan's sudden disinterest in the conversation
and her unfinished sentence and realises that she probably shouldn't have
interrupted her. The two walk home in silence, with an occasional 'bwee' from
P-chan. When they arrive at the Tendo household, Ranma-chan immediately heads
upstairs to take a hot bath, leaving Akane to stare at her retreating form
with a small sadness in her expression. Ranma does not come downstairs until
dinnertime, where he notices Akane feeding P-chan. She doesn't notice him
enter until he sits down without looking at her.]
Panda: [sign] Did Tofu-sensei find a cure?
Ranma: [politely] No, he did not.
Nabiki: [almost choking on her food] And you're not upset?
Ranma: [shakes his head] There isn't a reason I should be. Since I can't
be cured, I might as well deal with it as best I can.
[Everyone finishes dinner in silence. Ranma gets up and goes outside when
he finishes, again without looking at Akane. Akane sits with her hands in
her lap, with P-chan poking her in the leg with his snout.]
Akane: [thinking] Is he really upset, or is he just being mean since he
can't yell at me anymore?
[Cut to the rooftop, Ranma is lying on his back looking at the stars and
relaxing.]
Ranma: [thinking] Maybe I should tell her... Sooner or later she'll
figure it out...
[Ranma's reverie is interrupted as Shampoo appears on her bike and lands
on Ranma's head.]
Shampoo: Ni hao! [notices where she's landed] Oh! Ranma! I sorry!
Ranma: [barely audible] ...pain...
Shampoo: [gets off of Ranma and cradles him in her arms] I take care of
you...
Ranma: [trying to get away from Shampoo] Get away from me! Stop it! [notices
Akane appear on the roof] Uh...
Akane: I guess I don't have to ask why you're up here. You're with your true
love now, ne?
Shampoo: You not take care of Ranma like I do. Ranma happier with me.
Ranma: [squirms free and stands in front of Akane] Who said anything about
being with her??
Shampoo: Ranma? You not like me?
Ranma: [turns around] Yes, I like you. It's just that...
Ryouga: [from behind] Ranma!! Now I've got you! [throws bandanas at Ranma]
[Ranma grabs Akane and jumps away to avoid the bandanas, landing safely on
the ground with Akane cradled in his arms. Shampoo, on the other hand, jumps
away in a different direction and is splashed in mid-air by Kasumi, who was
tossing out old dishwater.]
Kasumi: Ah, gomen nasai!
[Ryouga, intent on following Ranma, trips over Shampoo's bike and falls
straight into the Tendo pond on the other side of the house.]
P-chan: [stuggling to stay afloat] Bwee! Bwee!
[Cut back to Ranma and Akane.]
Ranma: [to Akane, who's still cradled in his arms] Are you ok?
Akane: [looking up at Ranma] ...
[Ranma sets Akane down and then starts to head indoors.]
Akane: [hesitates] Ranma...
Ranma: [stops] Mmm.
Akane: [looks up at the sky] It's a nice night out...
Ranma: [glances upwards] Yeah, guess it is.
Akane: [looks at Ranma] Ranma, what were you going to say to me
earlier?
Ranma: [sits] It's not important.
Akane: [turns back to the stars with a hurt expression] I see.
Ranma: [sneaks a glance at Akane] Besides, it's nothing you'd be interested
in anyway.
Akane: How would you know?
Ranma: I just know.
Akane: Shut up, jerk.
Ranma: Who's calling who a jerk? Idiot!
Akane: Bastard!!
Ranma: Uncute!!
Akane: [very surprised that Ranma doesn't keel over as she expected] Wha...?
Ranma: What?? What?? [has a confused look on his face until he remembers he
hasn't fainted] Hey! I didn't faint!
Akane: [somewhat crestfallen] Yeah, you didn't.
Ranma: [to himself] But when... [remembers Tofu-sensei's tap on his head]
That sneaky bastard... He didn't tell me on purpose, so I'd tell
Akane... [looks at Akane, who seems a little down] well, she _is_
cute though... [sighs]
Akane: Well, I think I'll go and do my homework. [starts to head inside]
Ranma: You know, you really are cute sometimes. [smiles]
Akane: [dumbfounded] ...
Ranma: [leans back to continue looking at the stars] It really is a nice
night out.
Akane: [half-smiles and then slowly sits down next to Ranma] Yeah, I guess
it is.
[Ranma and Akane watch a shooting star streak across the sky. We follow their
gaze upwards and then back down to earth again as Tofu-sensei sips a cup of
tea while watching a shooting star through his window. He smiles, finishes
his tea, and then closes the window and draws the shades closed.]
---fin